reputation
by Fragilelittleflame
Summary: [HOPELESS series - part two] Bella and Edward travel the world to solidify their relationship before facing what reality holds for them. Can Bella handle what it takes to be with one of the deadliest men in Chicago? A/U - AH - RATED M
1. Ready For It?

_DISCLAIMER_ : All recognizable characters belong to Stephanie Meyer. No copyright infringement intended.

 _ **reputation**_

 _Knew he was a killer, first time that I saw him. Wondered how many girls he had loved and left haunted. But if he's a ghost then I can be a phantom, holding him for ransom. Some boys are trying too hard, he don't try at all though. Younger than my exes, but he act like such a man, so I see nothing better. I keep him forever, like a vendetta. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **…Ready For It?**_

"I don't want to do this," I grumbled to myself. Edward and I had only been in Italy for a week or two before Heidi called. She wanted me to come back for a few days to attend the Grammys at the beginning of February. I told her no.

Our compromise has become me in a hotel suite in Paris, surrounded by a film crew, watching the show live. If I win, they'll broadcast me live from Paris.

I would've rather just send one of my collaborators in my place in case we win anything, but Heidi insisted. She let me run away with Edward, so this is me paying her back I guess.

The worst part was that Edward couldn't be here. We were trying to keep our travels and relationship as hush hush as possible for right now. Mostly because we don't want paparazzi following us around the world.

I didn't trust the crew surrounding me to not spill to some tabloid about the man with me, so Edward was in our actual suite on the top floor. Probably blissfully asleep while I was surrounded by people that kept giving me side glances at three in the morning. _Time zones suck._

To make matters worse, I had a check-up with my doctor this afternoon. I knew my side was feeling a million times better. I could move without pain now, which made me unbelievably happy. My shoulder would act up from time to time, but I never needed the sling anymore. The doctor said I still had to keep up with my physical therapy for my arm, but my abdomen was healed. It also meant I could resume all regular physical activities.

Which meant that tonight should have been spent with Edward making me scream his name, not surrounded by cameras and prying eyes.

On the plus side, I had already won Best New Artist and Song Written for Visual Media. I lost Pop Vocal and Pop Solo Performance, but I never thought I would win them. I'm a mediocre vocalist at best, and I know it.

Song Written for Visual Media was the only one I wanted. I had never felt like I deserved any of these fancy awards, but I can't say that about this one. This whole process was about making music that transformed into visual art. We submitted every song off of _Badlands_ for this, and _Control_ made the cut.

Now, I had to sit through the rest of the show for Album of the Year. It was the 'highest honor' of the night, and they always saved it for last. So, I spent the next hour sitting in an uncomfortable chair in a scratchy dress watching the show with people I didn't know. _Lovely_.

"And now, the nominees for Album of the Year," the presenter said.

 _You're not going to win, but it'll be okay. You're not going to win, but it'll be okay._

I repeated my mantra over and over as they listed all of the amazing albums also nominated. I did get to leave after this was over, so that's the silver lining I was looking forward to.

"And the Grammy goes to… _Badlands_ by Isabella Swan!"

 _Fuck. Shit. Damnit._

The man across from me gave me a thumbs up, telling me that the camera was live. "Oh, _wow_. I definitely wasn't expecting this. Um, there are so many people that made this whole process possible. Peter, you signed me to your label without a second thought, I hope I made it worth it. You and Alison helped me find my musical side, there would be no album without the two of you.

"All of the talented producers and musicians I got to work with to put this album together, you guys made everything come to life. And, of course, thank you to the Recording Academy and everyone who voted. This is unbelievable, thank you."

God, I hated speeches. I always fumbled over my words and never knew what to say. But, shit, I won album of the fucking year.

The camera went dead and I relaxed slightly. "Are we good?" I asked the man in charge of this whole thing. I didn't remember his name.

"Yes, Ms. Swan. Thank you, and congratulations," he told me, a kind smile on his face.

I was able to sneak out of the room while everyone else cleaned up the equipment. It was nearing five in the morning, so I didn't have to worry about bumping into anyone in the halls as I made my way back to my suite with Edward.

Not two seconds after I opened the door were strong arms lifting me off of the ground and swinging me around.

"Fuck, I'm proud of you!" Edward mumbled against my neck.

"I'm surprised you're still awake," I laughed. Edward finally set me down on my own feet, but his hands never left my body. He pulled me into him, his lips immediately seeking mine.

"Of course, I'm awake. I had to see my girl win album of the fucking year at the Grammys." Edward's smiles seemed bigger than mine. Pure joy was radiating from him, and it was infectious.

" _And_ best new artist _and_ song written for visual media," I added, because I was pretty fucking proud now. Edward had the energy I needed to get excited about these wins.

He pulled me into the small living room of our suite and there was a tray of champagne and chocolate covered strawberries waiting for us.

"Congratulations, baby," Edward said as he popped the champagne and poured us both flutes full.

"I wish you could've been down there with me," I said. The moment they said my name each time would have been much more exciting with Edward there with me.

"I do, too. Next time," Edward said confidently. _Ha, sure_.

As I looked at him standing in the dark room, his chest bare and his legs only covered by a pair of silk boxers, I had a very good idea of how I wanted to celebrate.

"I met with the doctor today, remember?" I asked him. I knew he remembered, he flew the doctor in for crying out loud. I knew he just didn't want to push me into anything.

We still fought sometimes, about the shooting and how we both handled it, but the fights weren't anything serious. We knew they would end, and neither of us would ever leave the other.

"And?" Edward asked, his face trying to hide his hopefulness that he might get laid sometime in the near future.

Aside from the morning I caught him in the shower in Chicago, we hadn't done anything other than a few heavy make out sessions. We both knew that if we let ourselves do much more we would get carried away and, until now, we couldn't let ourselves get carried away. _Now, though…_

I quickly chugged my flute of champagne and smiled at Edward. I started to make my way toward our bedroom before I replied. "I'm cleared to resume all regular physical activities."

"That's, uh, that's great." Edward coughed out, his eyes followed my every movement, while mine landed on the tent that started to form in his boxers.

I shifted my arm and pulled the zipper of the sparkly grey dress down on my side. _Game on, Cullen_.

"Fuck," Edward muttered under his breath. He downed his own glass before crossing the distance over to me in just a few long strides.

His body crashed into mine, and we stumbled backward until my back hit the wall next to the entrance to our room. Our lips met in a frantic kiss, tongues and teeth colliding with force.

Edward pulled his lips from mine, but my own never left him. I nibbled down his jaw and spent some time adoring his ear lobe. I knew what the sound of my moans did to him, so I gave him a contented sigh in his ear before trailing my kisses down the column of his neck to his shoulder.

"Are you sure you want to –"

I let the hand that I stuck down his boxers be his answer.

"Fucking vixen," Edward grumbled. He pulled my hand away from him and lifted me in his arms easily. My legs wrapped around his waist as he carried me to the bedroom, but only for a few moments. As soon as we reached the bed he loosened my legs from around his hips and gently tossed me onto the fluffy mattress.

Edward covered my body with his quickly, and pulled my dress down so it bunched around my stomach.

I tried to not think about the giant scar on my shoulder that was on display for Edward, but it started to cloud my thoughts. I had been very careful around him, he never really saw the scars I was left with after the shooting. Until now.

Edward gently traced his fingers along my neck and down to my right shoulder. Then, he bent his head down to pepper soft kisses along every inch of the scar. His kisses made their way back up my neck to my lips.

He carefully pulled out the pins that were holding my hair up in an intricate braided contraption. I didn't want people knowing my hair was shorter, it was just a little way I thought I could stay more inconspicuous.

It fell just above my shoulders now. Edward loved running his fingers through it.

"I love you," Edward whispered against my lips.

I kiss him gently for a moment. "I love you, too." I replied. After another second of gentle kisses I ground my hips up into his, letting him know I was ready for more.

More kisses were trailed along my neck and collarbone. When Edward made it down to my breasts, he palmed both of them in his hands, his lips and tongue giving each one equal attention.

Edward leaned back and slid my dress down my legs, and I felt a twinge of embarrassment at the larger scar on my side. His lips covered it in soft kisses, just like they did with my shoulder. He spent more time here, kissing and licking the skin right above where I wanted him the most.

There was no preamble before Edward gripped both of my thighs and spread them as far apart as they could go. There were no gentle, teasing strokes before he sucked my clit roughly into his mouth, his tongue teasing it mercilessly.

"Shit!" I shouted when two fingers entered me, immediately curving to find the spot Edward knew drove me crazy. His fingers pounded into me quickly and his tongue continued to work over my clit, driving me into a frenzy.

Both of my hands gripped Edward's hair, holding him in place as I started to feel my stomach tightening.

"Come for me, baby girl," Edward mumbled against my skin.

A loud moan escaped my lips while my entire body convulsed. Edward's movements never slowed, and I swore I could feel that cocky smile on his lips between my legs.

Before I had time to recover, or even just catch my breath, Edward had my legs over his shoulders and his cock buried completely inside of me. There was nothing gentle or calm about his movements as he pounded into me.

"Our trip is about to get a lot more interesting, Bella," Edward grunted out. He leaned down and grabbed both of my breasts in his hands and gave them a satisfying squeeze.

"Just think of all of the places I can fuck you," Edward continued, his hips still keeping up his hard and fast thrusts and his hands still attached to my breasts. "Think of all of the ways I can make you come."

I let out an odd, strangled, gasp. It made Edward's hips move that much faster. My legs started to go numb from being bent at such and odd angle for so long, but I didn't care.

Edward's cock hit that sensitive spot inside me during three perfect thrusts and I felt my muscles clench around every perfect inch of his cock. He never stopped moving.

Edward threw my legs off of his shoulders and he gripped my hips, lifting the lower half of my body off of the bed. I threw my head back at the force of his thrusts at this new angle.

Sweat dripped down my body and I could see tiny beads of it dripping down Edward's chest. _God, he's beautiful_. His face scrunched in concentration and his eyes focused where his cock was pounding into me. Nothing was hotter than Edward when he's focused, especially when that focus is directed on us.

Our hips made sloppy sounds as our skin slapped together. Edward's breath began to come in harsh pants, and all of my breath left me in loud moans.

"Again," Edward demanded, and two harsh thrusts later I had no choice but to come around his cock, his name falling from my lips in a scream.

Edward stilled, his cock still buried inside of me. I could see the muscles in his stomach contracting as his cock pulsed his release inside of me.

One of his hands traced along my stomach, across my breasts, and eventually landed at my neck.

"Fuck, you're beautiful," he muttered. Edward leaned down to kiss me, his hand on my neck lightly massaging the skin there.

Edward collapsed on the bed next to me, and it took us both a solid ten minutes before we could say or do anything else.

Edward looked over at me and smiled when he saw I was looking at him. "I'm really fucking proud of you." He pulled me into him, his arms snaking around me.

"It is pretty cool, isn't it? Three Grammys…" I hadn't really thought too much about them. All day had been about getting through the telecast and then by the time that was over all I wanted to do was jump Edward. But I had won three Grammys. _Three_.

"Yeah, pretty damn cool."

…rep...

When I woke up the sun was peeking through the window at an odd angle. I strained my neck to see the clock and saw that it was nearing two in the afternoon, but Edward was still fast asleep next to me.

I gently extracted myself from his heavy arms and pulled on one of his discarded button-down shirts that was lying around. I tiptoed out of the room, and gently closed the bedroom door behind me.

I needed to be alone for what I was about to do.

Academy Award nominations were today. It was early morning in the states, and I knew the nominations were going to be announced in about an hour.

I had never actually watched them, though. When I got nominated the first time, I was out of the country and asleep during the nomination announcement. I had about three hundred texts and calls when I woke up about it.

I had been nominated once since then, but I was working when the announcement happened. I lost that time, obviously, but I didn't care. I had one Academy Award and that was more than I could have ever hoped for.

Not now, though. Winning those Grammys set a fire under me. My competitive side was flaring and I wanted to win.

Heidi had been emailing me since we left town and she's let me know what award's I've won already.

I won two Golden Globes, Best Actress in a Motion Picture (musical or comedy) and Best Original Song. Surprisingly, _Hurricane_ won the globe for original song. It was odd that _Control_ would get the Grammy nom for it and _Hurricane_ the Globe. Oh well, I'll take whatever I can get.

I also managed to snag a Screen Actors Guild award for Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Leading Role. _Gotta love those little naked statues_.

Typically, if you win the SAG you get the Oscar nom, and usually the win. It was just how it worked. But that doesn't mean it was a complete science. I could still get screwed over because I hadn't done any promotion in the months leading up to the nominations.

I grabbed my laptop and flipped it open. There was supposed to be a live telecast of the nominations online. It would be easier to watch that as opposed to trying to find the right channel over here.

I got the page pulled up with two minutes to spare before the live stream started. Jesus, there was a reason I never watched this before. _Too fucking stressful_.

The bedroom door swung open and made me jump. Edward stood there, clad in a new pair of boxers, and stared at me.

"You weren't going to wake me up?" he asked, a frown on covering his face.

I just shrugged. I didn't want him here if I was just going to be disappointed after.

Edward walked over and set my laptop on the coffee table in front of us. He pulled a blanket off the back of the sofa and draped it over our laps as he sat next to me, his arm falling around my shoulders and pulling me into his side.

The screen changed and some fancy music started to play.

"Shit," I mumbled.

Edward laughed a little at me, but grabbed my hand and gave it a comforting squeeze.

The president of the Academy made a short speech, before a comedian, I didn't catch her name, came on to start announcing the nominees.

They started out with categories like Production Design and Sound Mixing, none of which I thought I would be nominated for. My legs started to bounce and I began picking at my freshly manicured nails. Damn, this is nerve-wracking.

They kept up with the announcements, going through categories like Animated Short and Visual Effects.

"How long does it take to get to the actual acting awards?" I grumbled.

Edward placed a gentle kiss on the side of my head. I looked over at him and saw he actually looked a little nervous, too. _Damn, he's adorable_.

"You didn't think you'd get any of these?" Edward asked.

"No, we didn't have the budget to go all out on wardrobe, or to get too fancy with the editing."

Edward nodded, his eyes focused on the screen.

Supporting Actress was being announced and my nerves doubled. We didn't have anyone expected in the category, but we were getting closer.

After a few other categories such as Best Foreign Film and Documentary Short, we got to Original Song. I squeezed my eyes shut and buried my head in Edward's neck. I was squeezing his hand so tight I was surprised he hadn't complained. But he was squeezing mine nearly as tight.

"… _Control_ from _Welcome to the Badlands_." That's me!

"Fuck, yes!" Edward shouted. His arms wrapped around me and my eyes shot to the screen.

"Oh, my God," I mumbled. Seeing my name on that list was unbelievable.

They went through a few other categories, but I just stared at the screen with my mouth hanging open. I think Edward kissed my cheek, but I'm not completely sure.

 _I'm nominated for an Academy Award._

They moved on to Leading Actor and I held my breath as they went through the list. "Austin Greggory in _Welcome to the Badlands_."

"Yes!" I shouted, or more like squeaked. Austin played the 'Jacob' of the movie, and he was Alison's younger brother. Alison was my best friend in the business, and her brother had taken an interest in acting while he was in college.

I had needed an actor who wouldn't draw too much attention to the project, because we wanted to keep the whole thing quiet while we shot, and someone who would do it for a pretty small amount of money. I funded the whole project, after all.

I was pretty proud of how much Austin grew as an actor on that set, and I was unbelievably proud that he was nominated.

"And now, the nominees for Leading Actress."

My eyes were glued to the screen this time. My heart was pounding and I think my ears were ringing. _This is it._

"… Isabella Swan in _Welcome to the Badlands_."

Every late night I spent worrying about how I was going to pull this movie off. Every day I spent in a recording studio meticulously going over lyrics and beats. Everything Jacob put me through that inspired that whole thing.

It was all worth it.

Edward's arms picked me up off of the couch and he swung me around in that cliché way guys do in every romantic comedy. I kind of loved it, though.

"I can't believe it," I mumbled to myself.

Shit, this is unreal.

Being nominated for an Oscar is every actor's dream. Whether they're just starting out and were doing car commercials, or if they were a little more established and working on some high-profile projects, they all wanted it. No matter what they say when they're asked.

I have been nominated twice in my short career, two times in about five years is unbelievable enough. When I won three years ago I never had any expectations that I would win another, or ever be nominated again.

To have a project I conceived completely on my own receive this kind of attention is mind boggling.

"This is… amazing, Bella," Edward said once he put me back on my feet. He gave me a quick but passionate kiss on my lips, and I couldn't stop the giant smile that took over my face.

"And now, the nine finalists for Best Picture."

I flopped back down on the couch and let my head fall back against the back cushions and my eyes close. All of that stress was exhausting. I had no expectations for a Best Picture nomination, so I could finally relax.

I could feel Edward on the couch next to me, and I peeked at him. He was sitting with his arms propped on his knees, and his head in his hands. He had a look of complete concentration on his face as he stared at the screen as movies popped up.

 _God, I love him._

I sat up on my knees and started to place kisses along his shoulder and up his neck.

" _Welcome to the Badlands_."

My lips froze on Edward's shoulder and my eyes flew to the screen. _No fucking way_.

"Oh, my God," I mumbled. I sat up and pulled the laptop into my lap. That couldn't be right. "Oh, my God," They showed a list of the films nominated for Best Picture and there it was. " _Oh, my God_."

I looked up and Edward was standing there with a flute full of champagne, and a gorgeous smile on his face.

"Congratulations," he told me. I took the glass from his hand and downed it quickly because, _shit_ , Best Picture.

"I just – I can't believe it," I told him. I stood up because I was starting to feel jittery, like every nerve in my body was bouncing around underneath my skin.

"I mean, I hoped for Original Song and maybe Lead Actress. Once the Academy decides they like you, you've kind of got an in, you know? So, I thought they might throw a nom or two my way," I said as I paced around the living room in circles around Edward.

"But Best Picture? I mean, that's… that's _Forrest Gump_ and _Silence of the Lambs_ and..."

Edward's hands gripped my arms and stopped my pacing. I looked up at him and reveled in the look of pride and wonder in his eyes. _I put that there_.

"And you're Isabella Swan. You are, without a doubt, the most talented woman I have ever met. Most of those people are good at one thing: acting. But you, you've also got three Grammys under your belt now. Don't ever think that you don't deserve a place amongst them."

I took a deep breath to calm down, and then looked up at Edward. I stared at him for a few moments. Seeing the excitement in his own eyes made my stomach fill with butterflies.

"I've got three Academy Award nominations," I whispered and a smile crept up on my face.

"That's pretty impressive," Edward whispered back. His arms wrapped around my waist and played with the hem of his shirt I was wearing.

I stood on my tip toes so I could reach his neck and give him light kisses along the column of his throat. "Thanks for watching with me."

"Shit, I don't know if I've ever been that nervous." Edward admitted. He bent down to trail kisses on my neck now.

"Nothing compares to sitting in the theater surrounded by the best actors in the world waiting to see who won. _That's_ stressful." My arms traced up Edward's, enjoying the feel of his muscles under my hands. My right hand found a bumpy patch of skin. "What's this?"

Edward looked down at his arm and shrugged. "I got grazed by a bullet about a year ago."

I sighed and leaned over to give his arm a light kiss.

"Do you want to call anyone?" Edward asked, but started to walk me back toward the bedroom at the same time.

"Not really, I think we need to properly celebrate first."

…rep…

Unfortunately, I'm forced to face reality the next morning. My phone had vibrated on the nightstand all night long. Eventually it got overloaded and turned itself off. Now it was time to finally go through the thousands of emails, phone calls, and texts I knew were on it.

Edward went to the little office in our suite to work a bit. He didn't work nearly as often as he usually did, but I knew he still had to keep an eye on his business. I think he was also playing around with the stock market.

I curled up on a chaise lounge with my phone and laptop. I pulled up my text messages on my laptop and spent a good two hours replying to all of them. I sent a simple 'thank you!' to most of them. But some of my closest friends sent paragraphs about how excited they were for me, so I took the time to truly thank them. Those were few and far between.

I sent Austin and his family a group text.

 _So, so excited for Austin's nom! I'm out of the country now, but I'd love to have you all over for dinner a few days before the ceremony if you're free and in town. Let me know!_

Alison and Austin's parents were amazing. They sacrificed everything so their kids' dreams could come true. They were always so nice to me whenever I was around them, they started to feel like my surrogate parents, too.

I knew Edward and I were going to end up in Los Angeles for at least a week for the ceremony. It was the one thing I promised Heidi before I left, that we would come back for the Oscars if we got nominated.

I dreaded it at the time, but now I was pretty excited about it. The thought of going on the red carpet made me want to vomit, but the actual show should be fine. Exciting, even.

I wanted to win. There was no denying that. I'm not a competitive person in my day to day life. But when it comes to my job, I wanted to be the best. I wanted to break records and accomplish things no one before me has. And I wanted to add another golden statue or two to my collection.

I found a voicemail from my dad and decided to call him back.

"Bells! How's it feel?" he asked, his voice booming.

"Hey, dad. Still pretty unreal."

"Best Picture! You'll get at least one more, I know it." Charlie's voice got farther away from the speaker as he called for my mother to come join him. _Perfect_.

"Bella! Congratulations, darling. We're so proud of you," Renee said. To my surprise, she actually sounded like she was proud. I must have caught her in a good mood.

"You're coming back from that odd vacation for the ceremony, aren't you?" Renee asked me.

I called them from Chicago before Edward and I left and told them I was going to be gone for a while. I couldn't have the conversation in person because I couldn't handle Renee's judgy looks. It was just easier to deal with her over the phone.

Charlie didn't mind, of course. He just told me to be careful.

"I'll be in Los Angeles for about a week, I think, for the ceremony. Then I'm going back out."

I can practically feel the disappointment radiating off of her over the phone.

"Well, we're real proud of you Bells. You let us know if you need anything from us, okay?" Charlie said.

"I will. Thanks, dad." I hung up after that.

A few minutes later I was finally done replying to texts and moved on to emails. I had about twenty from Heidi, all from within the last twenty-four hours.

Heidi is a phenomenal manager, one of the best in the business. But Oscar nominations are enough to send even the best managers into a panic.

Most of Heidi's emails were about interview requests. The month before the Academy Awards, if you were nominated, was filled with interviews. Twelve hours a day were spent talking about yourself and your project. It was exhausting.

Her emails got more frantic as she told me that, because Control was up for Original Song, it was customary for me to perform it. _Shit_.

I knew that was how things worked, it just completely slipped my mind. I had never performed on live television. I didn't really have time for award shows and such during _Badlands'_ release. Now my first award show performance of it was going to be at the fucking Oscars.

I typed out a quick response to the most pressing issues Heidi brought up.

 _I'm not doing any interviews before the ceremony. I'll do a few on the red carpet. If we win I'll do the press room, appropriate shows the next day, etc._

 _We're not milking the shooting for sympathy votes. Have Claire put out a simple thank you statement from me._

 _Tell me more about the performance and what I can do with it. Can you even say 'goddamn' on television?_

I started to go through the look-book of designer dresses that were attached to one of Heidi's emails next. It consisted of dresses by designers I typically wore. I was scrolling through the images when Edward emerged from the office.

"How's it going?" He asked me. He came over and leaned down on the floor next to my lounge.

"I'm already exhausted. I want to go to the show, but I also don't want to leave our little bubble here." I slid my laptop off of me and pulled Edward into the chair. I let him sit where I was and then situated myself in his lap.

"How long do you think we need to be in Los Angeles? A week or two?" He asked.

"Probably closer to two if I've got to rehearse a performance. At least."

"That's not too bad. Two weeks there, followed by you winning a few Academy Awards, and then we can go to… London? Ireland? Wherever you want."

I thought about it for a moment. "Somewhere with a beach. Just for you and me."

"Done."

I smiled at him and gave him a quick kiss. "Thanks for putting up with all of this."

"Bella, there's nothing to put up with. I'm so fucking proud of you, and I can't wait to see you in your element there."

I guess I was pretty excited about it too. I was ready to win.

 **A/N: Here we go – a little peak into what they've been up to! If you hadn't already guessed, this story is based off of** _ **reputation**_ **by Taylor Swift. I know Taylor is someone most people either love or hate, but just like HK you don't have to like/listen to the music in order to enjoy the story.**

 **Let me know what you all thought of this one?**


	2. End Game

_I bury hatchets, but I keep maps of where I put 'em. Reputation precedes me, they told you I'm crazy, I swear I don't love the drama, it loves me. And I can't let you go, your hand prints on my soul. It's like your eyes are liquor, it's like your body is gold. You've been calling my bluff on all my usual tricks, so here's the truth from my red lips. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **End Game**_

…rep…

Calloused hands roamed across my bare back, and soft lips left wet kisses along my shoulder. _Not a bad way to wake up_.

I hummed in pleasure and turned my head toward Edward. "Good morning."

Edward gave me a lazy smile and continued his exploration of my neck. Vacation was doing him wonders. He was less moody and had a healthy glow about him. I didn't know if the glow was from less stress or happiness or both, but I loved it.

I had decided there were two different Edward's. Not in a 'take him to the nearest mental hospital' way, but in a way that helped me come to terms with him and his life. My Edward, the one who woke me up with gentle kisses, was my favorite. He was loving and passionate and would do anything for me.

Then, there was the Chicago-Edward. He was cold and hard and ruthless. I had only seen glimpses of him, but I knew I would see him more in time. It was hard for me to imagine my Edward doing those things, but his words the night of Alice's party bring me a little bit of comfort whenever I get too worried about it.

 _I'm not a good man, Bella. I've killed people. I happily killed the man who outed you to Volturi, and I'd do it again in a heartbeat if it meant keeping you safe… If protecting what I love means I have to get my hands dirty, then so be it_.

Of course, I knew there were things his family did that weren't just about protecting themselves. They didn't need to deal the drugs and weapons that they did. That was just business to them, I guessed.

I wondered if Edward saw me the same way. _Actress Bella vs. his Bella?_

"That's too much thinking for this early in the morning," Edward mumbled against my neck.

I craned my neck up and checked the time. "Shit, I have to get up," I stumbled out of bed and into the bathroom.

Edward, being the gentleman that he is, allowed me to at least use the toilet before he joined me. He leaned against the counter while I brushed my teeth and made myself somewhat presentable.

"Last day of rehearsal, right?" He asked.

I knew what he was getting at. It was killing him that I never let him come to a rehearsal.

We had gotten back to Los Angeles about ten days ago, and from the moment we walked in the front door I had been working. Heidi had booked me a rehearsal studio, and I was there from seven in the morning until seven at night. Today was the last rehearsal, until soundcheck at the actual venue the day before the ceremony.

I didn't want Edward distracting me at rehearsal, and I knew he would. One look from those bright green eyes and I would be imagining him doing very bad things to me, and he knew it.

I did feel bad leaving him alone all the time. Every time I mentioned it, Edward told me he had work to do anyway, but I still missed our little bubble of just us.

"Austin, Alison, and their parents are coming over for dinner tonight," I reminded him.

I couldn't wait to see them all. Alison had been busy, she was on tour the same time I was last year, so I hadn't seen her in months. We tended to lose touch while we were both busy with work, but we always knew we were still there for each other when things calmed down.

Austin had been swamped the last month, too. Poor guy had to jump through all of the media hoops for his nomination.

Edward nodded. "I can work upstairs –"

I frowned. That's not what I meant. "No, I want you to meet them." I told him. Then a knot of guilt formed in my stomach. "I don't mean to… I don't like hiding you away. I just like having you to myself."

Edward pulled me into his arms and his hands rested dangerously close to my ass. "I know. We'll have to come clean eventually, but this isn't the time." His hands kneaded my ass through my sleep shorts and his lips attached themselves to my neck.

"I have to go," I mumbled against the soft skin of Edward's chest.

Edward ignored my weak protest and pulled me against his obvious arousal.

"We haven't had sex in seven days," Edward complained, his hands still grinding me against him. _Don't I fucking know it._

"I know. I'm just busy and stressed and –" Edward cut me off with his lips.

Edward pulled away from me, a gentle smile on his face. "You're like a boxer before a big match," he let me go after another quick kiss.

…rep…

I had just enough time to get home and showered before everyone showed up for dinner. Edward was dressed in a pair of dark slacks and a light grey button down. He had his sleeves rolled up to his elbows and it made me want to revisit our conversation from this morning.

I pulled on a simple black, long-sleeved romper. Edward came over just as I was straightening it, making sure if covered the scar on my shoulder. He pulled the sleeve down and kissed along the discolored flesh.

The buzzing from the gate interrupted the moment, and I straightened my sleeve again before heading down stairs. I buzzed them in and went outside to wait for them. Edward met me outside, his arm wrapping around my waist.

Alison and Austin exited the car and their parents, Sophia and Ethan, followed. I ran over and Alison met me in a big hug.

Austin wrapped his arms around me from behind and pulled me away from his sister, lifting me off of the ground.

"Put her down, Austin," Ethan scolded. I just smiled.

"Come in," I told them. I grabbed Edward's hand as I passed him and pulled him inside with me.

We gathered around the living room. "Edward, this is Alison, Austin, Sophia, and Ethan Greggory. This is my boyfriend, Edward Cullen."

Alison gave me a you've-been-holding-out-on-me smirk and I just smiled at her.

Ethan reached a hand out to Edward and they had one of those stare downs where they size each other up. _Ridiculous_.

"You taking good care of her?" He asked, his voice much more gruff and intimidating than I knew it actually was.

"I'm trying. She doesn't make it easy," Edward said, smirking in my direction.

Ethan just laughed, and I knew Edward had won him over. The boys got into a discussion about sports, football I think, and the girls wandered into the kitchen. I still kept an eye on Edward though, just in case. _I didn't like sharing_.

"He's gorgeous," Alison said the second we were in the kitchen.

"Yes, he is," I agreed with a smile. I pulled the food out of the oven and set it on the table. I couldn't take credit for it, I had ordered a meal from my favorite Italian restaurant down the street. All I did was stick it in the oven to reheat it.

"How long have you been seeing him?" Sophia asked.

I frowned. That was a complicated answer. "It was rocky at first. I met him in June of last year. We had a bit of a falling out around the time of the, uh, shooting. We've been traveling together since the beginning of the year, though."

"And how are you doing, sweetie?" Sophia asked me. Her eyes were sad and she reached an arm out to pat my hand.

Sophia was the mother I always wanted. She was kind and loving and cared. She was unbelievably proud of her children. There was never a moment she wasn't supporting them. I'll always be thankful that she decided to take me under her wing, too.

"I'm doing okay. I still have to work on getting my arm back to normal. But," I shrugged. "I'm alive."

"I still just… can't believe that happened." Alison said, shaking her head.

The men decided to come in then. Edward took the food out of my hands and started carrying everything to the table. I shook my head to clear my mind of dark thoughts. Tonight was a good night, a night of celebration.

Dinner flowed easily. I was happy to see that everyone got along well with Edward. Not that there was anyone Edward couldn't charm, but I wanted my friends to like him, and vice versa.

We talked about Austin and I's nominations, and what Sunday would bring. Ethan asked Edward about his business and I immediately tensed up. Edward just placed a hand on my thigh and went into an in-depth conversation with Ethan about his business dealings and the stock market.

I talked with Alison and Austin about how Edward was going to be with me on the red carpet, but as a member of my team and not my boyfriend. That way he could be near, but no one would suspect anything.

This was just what I needed. I needed a quite night with friends to forget about the stress that was waiting for me in just a couple days.

…rep…

Edward found me on the couch in the living room early Sunday morning. I had brought out my first Oscar and set him on the coffee table in front of me. I had been staring at it for about an hour before Edward got up.

He didn't say anything, he just came and sat next to me. He leaned back and put an arm around my shoulder without a word.

"I want to win," I blurted out. Edward's head turned toward me as I continued. "I know it's egotistical to think I deserve another. I should be happy with one. I'm young, I have time to make more movies and get more awards. But I want one for _this_ movie."

"This one is all you. You wrote most of it yourself. You made the music. It's your story. You can't tell Emmett or Jasper, but I've spent some time searching the internet about tonight. Your name has come up quite a bit as a leader in who will win."

I wanted to take comfort in that, but I couldn't. Things were too unpredictable. Most people usually just mentioned my name to get more clicks on an article.

"No matter what, you put out an incredible film. You should be proud."

I looked over at Edward and smiled. "And you'll be there to make me feel better after I lose?" I asked him.

"Win or lose, I'll always be there."

The rest of the afternoon went by too quickly. A team of stylists surrounded me nearly the second I got out of the shower, and I haven't had a moment alone since.

Kate got here early and began prepping Edward for what he could expect. Heidi and Claire, my publicist, got here not long after her and began prepping me about what I should expect.

Edward found me around one and tried to get me to eat something, but I was too nervous. I could eat later.

Time seemed to move at light speed the rest of the afternoon. I got more panicked as we got closer to the time to leave. Not panicked about the ceremony, but the red carpet.

The last time I was on one wasn't pretty. Images of Kate hovering above me, covered in my blood, flashed through my mind.

Fuck, why did I agree to this?

I looked at myself in the mirror after my stylists had helped me into my dress. It was a nude color, and from a distance it might look like I was naked, but I liked the symbolism. This movie bared my soul to everyone, so it was kind of fitting.

The dress covered nearly every inch of my skin; it had a high neckline and long sleeves, but the nude sequined lace looked nearly see through on the hanger. Of course, I was wearing nude under garments to cover the important bits, but they were practically invisible.

I must have spent too long looking at myself, because Edward knocked on the door. "Bella?"

"Come in," I told him.

He looked magnificent. Edward in a tuxedo was a sight to behold. His black tuxedo was classic and I knew he would blend in fine in the crowd. His hair was still out of control, but I liked it.

"You're… breathtaking." He told me. He took my hand in his and made me twirl, his eyes taking in every inch of my dress.

"You do seem to be missing something, though."

That made me frown. I looked down; I had heels on, my hair was pinned up in another intricate knot to disguise my short hair, and my makeup was flawless.

I looked back at Edward and saw he had a shiny black box in his hands. _Oh_.

"You didn't have to…" I started to say, but Edward opened the box and revealed the most gorgeous pair of diamond earrings I had ever seen. Each had a cluster of a few diamonds flowing up, they would look like a mini cuff on my ear. Then there was a single teardrop shaped diamond hanging down.

Edward ignored my protest, took the earrings out of the box and handed them to me. I quickly hooked them in my ears, and Edward pushed my hair back slightly so he could see them.

"Beautiful," he told me. His eyes shimmered with love and I had to force myself not to cry. Chrissy would kill me if I ruined my makeup already. "I know I won't have much time to see you once we leave, so I'm going to tell you this now."

I nodded and he continued.

"I love you. I'll love you if you win tonight, and if you don't. I'll love you if you trip on the red carpet and if you forget the words on stage. But I'm so goddamn proud of you. You're standing here even though I know you're terrified to go out there. You're the strongest woman I have ever known."

I squeezed my eyes shut, forcing the tears to back away. "You couldn't have said all of that before I got my makeup done?" I asked with a little laugh. I wanted to kiss him. I really wanted to kiss him, but I couldn't.

Things moved at light speed again, and before I knew it I was sitting in a line of cars waiting to be dropped off at the carpet. Kate was with me, but Edward had gone ahead with Heidi and Claire. They would be there when I got out.

"This is it." I told Kate.

She gave me a smile. "This is it." She agreed.

"I'm so fucking nervous. I don't remember being this nervous last time." I told her, clutching my stomach that felt like it had someone doing summersaults in it.

"That's because this one was all you. You made the movie, you _were_ the movie. It's more personal."

I frowned. "When did you get so wise?"

"Time off has done me wonders," she said with a smile. She did look pretty happy.

The car came to an abrupt stop and there was a soft tap on the window. _Fuck_.

The door opened slowly, and the rumble of the crowd creeped in. I took the outstretched hand of the valet opening the door, and plastered on the best smile I could manage.

There was a fan stand on either side in front of me, and a sea of reporters filled the center walkway. I kept a smile on my face and gave a small wave to the people in the stands. Heidi and Claire were immediately next to me, and I saw Edward standing next to Ben and Eric.

Edward told me he had them following us all through our vacation. I recognized Ben, of course, from the night of the shooting. I didn't put up a fight when Edward requested they be here, too.

I was ushered through the press line by my team, and I felt Edward's warm hand on my back, leading me through the throng of people.

"We're not doing red carpet interviews," Claire whisper-shouted in my ear. _Thank God_.

We were surrounded by chaos. I could hear my name being said by reporters as I walked past, but I never stopped to look at them. Once one got my attention I would have to stop for them all.

A few people stopped and gave me kind smiles while they were in the middle of interviews, but Heidi and Claire kept me moving.

Things were a little calmer when we got to the backdrop for pictures. I didn't spend much time there though. Claire moved me through the line quickly, much to the disappointment of the photographers shouting at us.

We did arrive a little late, so I supposed that could be my excuse. I knew they were probably doing it so I didn't get too overwhelmed, though.

Heidi and Claire went with Edward to my dressing room backstage and Kate walked with me to my seat. "You've got this," she whispered to me as I sat next to Austin.

"This is crazy," he whispered to me just as the host came out. Ellen was hosting again this year, and I was pretty excited about it. She was one of my absolute favorite people in this industry.

"Bella Swan made it tonight, and I think I speak on behalf of everyone in this room when I say we're happy to have you here and safe, even though you've beaten most of them out for one award or another in the past." Ellen said during her monologue. I knew about ten different cameras would be on me, so I laughed and gave a comical shrug.

Then, the waiting began. Most of the categories I was nominated in were typically saved for the end of the telecast, so I had to sit back and wait. My performance would be near the middle of the show, though. And it wasn't long until Kate found me again to pull me away to change.

It was complete madness backstage, but eerily calm in my dressing room. Edward stood in the corner, quietly watching over everything. He looked nervous, which made me fall in love with him more and then doubled my own nerves.

Kate helped me change into my performance outfit. It consisted of a body suit that cut of at my panty line. It was cream and had a simple floral leaf pattern along it. The straps covered my arm in just the right spot, and the sweetheart neckline dipped down just above my belly button. Then, at my waist, there was a belt that hooked four large panels of cream tulle around my waist that flowed to my feet.

A producer came in and told us we had five minutes before I had to be ready and my stomach dropped. _Shit, shit, shit._

"You've got this, Bella." Kate told me, her arms clutching my shoulders. I took a few deep breaths and nodded.

I turned to look at Edward, and his eyes burned into mine. He didn't have to say anything, his eyes said it all. He gave me a nod and my favorite cocky smirk.

I could do this.

…rep…

Everyone was cheering around me when I entered my dressing room again. I guessed that meant the performance went okay, I couldn't remember. I was pretty sure I blacked out.

The second I was in the room Edward had his arms wrapped around my waist, squeezing me as tight as he could.

"You were amazing. That _growl_ …"

It was my turn to smirk at him. I had been working on my vocals for the song for the past two weeks. I knew he would like the little growl.

"We've got to get you changed. There's about twenty minutes until they announce Original Song," Kate told us.

Edward let me go and people immediately surrounded me to help me change. I was back in my seat within ten minutes, sitting next to Austin.

My heart was still racing from the performance, and I knew I had a goofy grin on my face. The hardest part of tonight was over, and it went better than I could have expected, I think.

The actress who won Supporting Role last year walked on stage with the iconic envelope. She started reading the nominees, and I saw flashes of each face appear on the screen behind her.

Austin grabbed my hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.

"And the Oscar goes to… _Control_ , Isabella Swan."

Austin jumped up next to me and began clapping, and I sat there with my mouth hanging open for a few seconds before I was able to pull myself together.

I stood on shaky legs and gave Austin a quick hug. Bradley Cooper rushed over and held my arm as I walked up the steps. He liked to constantly remind me of the time I tripped when I won my first Oscar, so I guess this was him making up for all of the teasing.

When I got to the mic in the center of the stage and was handed that shiny gold statue my heart burst. _I did it._

"Oh, wow. I just –" my voice cracked but I did my best to power through. "I put everything on the line to make this movie and album happen. Literally every single person told me not to do it," I laughed. "But I did it anyway, and it might've been stupid at the time, but it was so worth it. Um, Alison and Peter, you taught me everything I know about music and writing songs. I couldn't have done this without you. There are a million other people to thank, and I know I'll forget someone if I try to list them all. Just… thank you."

I hugged my new golden friend to my chest and was ushered off the stage. My mind was going a million miles a minute. People around me congratulated me and gave me hugs. I didn't know most of them, but I was in too big of a haze to care.

Heidi met me with a smile at the press room. I only had time for a few questions before I had to get back for the last few categories. Most of them were simple questions like how it felt to win again, and what the day had been like so far.

Heidi took my statue and promised to look after it for me. A few people reached out for high fives as I walked past them to my seat, and Austin gave me another hug as I sat down.

He lost his category, but was a gracious as ever as he clapped for the winner. This had been Austin's first movie. For him to have gotten a nomination was impressive. I knew it wouldn't be his last.

Leading Actress and Best Picture were the last two awards to be announced. I wasn't nervous anymore, though. I was high on the adrenaline from by Original Song win.

My head fell into my hands and an impressive string of curses escaped my mouth when my name was announced for Actress in a Leading Role.

I stood on even more unstable legs than before and this time Austin helped me up the stairs.

"Oh, my God," I mumbled into the microphone, holding my second statue of the night. "This is… I just…. _Wow_." Every single person in the theater was now standing and applauding and I was pretty sure my blush was so powerful it was visible through the inch of makeup covering my face. "I've had the honor to work with and learn from some amazing people. And I know I wouldn't be here without their guidance and friendship." I shook my head, trying to think of something better to say, but my mind was completely blank. "You've been with me through the darkest moments of my life," my voice came out in a sob, but thankfully the tears hadn't started yet. I knew there were a lot of people who were going to think I was talking about them, but Edward knew. "And you know who you are and I love you. _Thank you_."

I didn't have time to go through the press room again, because Best Picture was being announced next. Someone grabbed my statue from my hands, hopefully Heidi or Claire, and I was rushed back to my seat.

Austin looked at me in bewilderment and I returned the look. As they listed off the nominees for Best Picture I knew what I had to do. I had this feeling, deep in my gut, that I wasn't winning. But I also knew I wasn't done.

I hadn't thought much about what the future would hold for me. I had contemplated giving up acting completely right after the shooting, but it hadn't crossed my mind since. That wasn't an option now though.

 _Spotlight_ won Best Picture and I stood and clapped for the cast. I was truly happy for them because I knew I shouldn't win for this. This wasn't my time. Not yet.

…rep…

The next three hours were a blur. I spent a while in the press room, and took the obligatory photo with everyone who won the main four acting awards.

I was ushered around a room filled with reporters. I was hugged by every person I saw. I sat and chatted with the man screwing my nameplate to the plaque on both of my statues. Kate sat next to me for that, but I wished Edward could be sitting there instead.

Next time.

I was in a car around eleven and on the way to a nearby hotel to change for the Vanity Fair party. I didn't really want to go, but I knew I had to. Edward, unfortunately, was already at the hotel with Heidi and Claire.

He was coming to the party, though. I would finally be able to spend a little bit of time with him after this crazy, hectic night.

I tripped walking through the lobby because my eyes were glued to the two statues in my hands. Kate caught me, thankfully.

When we entered the room, everyone went completely silent. Edward was there, still in his tux, and his eyes were green fire.

He stalked toward me, and I pushed my awards into Kate's arms. Edward lifted me off of the ground, his arms tight around my waist. His lips crushed mine, but it was an odd kiss because we were both smiling too big to do much in the way of actual kissing.

"I'm so fucking proud of you," he whispered against my lips.

I wanted to kick everyone out and spend the rest of the night with Edward. I wanted to know what he had done all night and wanted to tell him about mine, but that would have to wait.

We got separated after that because I was led into a bedroom to change into my final dress of the night. It was similar to my original in that it had a high neckline and long sleeves, but the beaded and woven detail stand out against the soft fabric of this one. It was a neutral gold, just like my two new statues.

Edward and I got to ride together on the way to the Vanity Fair party. When the car stopped and it was time for me to get out, I made an impulsive decision. I was too deliriously happy to care much, though.

"Come with me." I told Edward, a giant smile plastered on my face.

"I'll meet you inside." He told me with a smirk.

"No, come with me, _now_. This is probably the biggest night of my career. I don't want to meet you in the corner of the party. I want you by my side." I held out one of my statues to him. "You hold one, I'll hold one."

"Bella, there's a line of photographers –"

"I know. I don't care."

Edward gave me an incredulous look, but eventually he grasped the statue out of my hand.

It took some maneuvering, but Edward switched spots with me so he was out of the door first. _Ever the gentleman_.

Once he was out, his hand reached out for mine and he helped me out of the car. Claire was already there and looked at me like I was insane, but I just shrugged.

This was my night. I was going to do what I wanted.

…rep…

"Now, you have three. _Three_ Academy Awards. How does that feel?" Ellen asked me.

I relaxed back in comfortable white chair and smiled. "Not real. I don't think it's really sunk in yet. Probably because of the exhaustion," I laughed, but it was completely true. I had been up over twenty-four hours, but it was worth it.

Edward and I caused a bit of a scene at the Vanity Fair party, and I was going to have the picture of him smiling down at me, an Oscar in each of our hands, framed. I had never seen either of us so happy.

I dodged questions about him for the rest of the night and into the next morning, but it wasn't hard. I had a lot of other things to talk about.

This was my last stop, talking to Ellen on a special live episode of her show.

"You looked gorgeous last night, you had quite a few different dresses. This was my favorite." On the screen behind her, a picture of Edward and I on the red carpet at the Vanity Fair party popped up.

I laughed. "I liked that one too, it kinda matched the awards, you know?" I said seriously.

"Now, who's that handsome fella holding one of your awards?" She asked me with a smirk.

I just shook my head at her. "You're the only person I'm going to let get away with asking that and not give you a snarky remark."

"You had an amazing response when someone asked you that on the Today Show. Absolutely amazing!"

A clip started to play behind us. The woman interviewing me brought up Edward and wouldn't stop pushing the subject. Eventually I got fed up and said "I just won two Academy Awards. I have more important things to talk about other than who's arm I was on last night."

"You know, Ellen, some reporters just don't get the hint when you don't want to talk about something." I told her.

"Well, you definitely did have more important things to talk about. Last night was phenomenal for you. I'm so proud of you, the film and album were amazing." Ellen told me with sincerity.

I smiled at her. "Thank you."

The camera's stopped rolling and I slumped back in the chair.

"Are you done after this?" Ellen asked me.

"Yes, finally. I don't know if I've ever been this tired."

The only thing that motivated me to get up was knowing my next stop was my own bed. Hopefully with Edward in it.

 **A/N: Thank you so much for the response to the first chapter! I'm so glad you guys are liking it so far.**

 **I know it has been a lot of 'Hollywood' these first two chapters, but that's it for a while. See ya next time!**


	3. Delicate

_Third floor on the West Side, me and you. Handsome, you're a mansion with a view. Do the girls back home touch you like I do? Long night with your hands up in my hair. Stay here, honey, I don't wanna share. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **Delicate**_

…rep…

A tickling between my thighs woke me up.

The last thing I remembered was stumbling home late Monday afternoon after the craziest thirty-six hours of my life. I think Edward had been in the shower when I got home. All I knew was that I collapsed in bed and was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

A tongue sliding along the length of my pussy woke me up, though.

My eyes popped open and I looked down to see an Edward-shaped bulge under the comforter. A loud moan escaped me as he took another full-length lick along my lips. _Shit_.

I tossed the comforter off the bed and was met with Edward's out of control hair sticking up between my thighs.

"Good morning," Edward said, his voice thick and deep.

He took his time. He spent I don't know how long lapping slowly between my legs. Every once in a while, his tongue would flick my clit a few times, but he always resumed his slow pace shortly after.

It was torture. Delicious torture.

When I tried to thrust my hips up to meet him and move things along be threw an arm over my stomach. "Be good," he told me.

"P-please," I begged. I sounded pathetic, but I didn't care. I just needed _more_.

"Please what? You've got awards for those songs you write, baby. Use your words."

Shit. I wasn't good with the dirty talk like Edward. I loved listening to it, and I was pretty sure Edward could get me off with just his words alone, but I had no clue where to start.

Another torturously slow lick ended with the lightest pressure on my clit and I wanted to scream.

I gripped his hair and tried to get him where I needed him, but Edward pulled my hand free from his hair and pinned it to the bed. _Damnit_.

"Talk, Bella." Another light flick of his tongue and I was done for.

" _Fuck_ me," I shouted embarrassingly loud, but I was past the point of caring.

Edward didn't do anything, though. He continued his slow ministrations, his tongue lazily tracing across my wet skin.

"With my tongue? My fingers?" Edward asked, his eyes looking up at me from between my legs. _Jesus_.

"Anything."

Two fingers slammed into me and my eyes immediately rolled back into my head. _Yes_.

His fingers pumped in an even rhythm and Edward's tongue moved along my stomach, across my breasts, until his face was level with mine.

I opened my eyes as Edward brought the two fingers he was using on me up between us. His fingers glistened in the dim light. It was a surprising turn on to see his fingers coated in my arousal.

Edward traced one of his soaked fingers lightly along my lower lip. "Taste."

My tongue peaked out and lightly licked along my bottom lip. It wasn't as horrible as I would have thought it to taste. A little… tangy maybe?

Edward pulled my lower lip into his mouth and sucked. He turned us so we were both on our sides, facing each other.

My arms wrapped around his shoulders and I pulled myself as close to him as I could. The feel of his skin under my hands, his chest against mine… nothing could compare.

Edward situated our legs, scissored between each other's. He slowly thrust his cock between my legs, never entering me, but teasing me enough to drive me mad.

I whimpered when he got right _there_ , but he pulled away again. "Please, please, please," I mumbled over and over into his neck. My nails dug into his skin, but I didn't have the mental capacity to worry about scratches.

A loud porn-worthy moan escaped my lips as he finally, slowly, entered me.

One of Edward's hands gripped my ass to keep me in place and the other arm was wrapped around my neck, keeping me close. "Tell me how it feels, Bella."

I buried my head further into his neck. "So, so good. Like I'm complete. Whole. Full." Words kept blubbering out of my mouth; random adjectives spilled from my lips.

Edward's lips covered mine and his hips abandoned their slow, even strokes for faster, harder thrusts. He kept his grip on me tight, and I tried to muffle the noises coming out of me by sucking on his neck. It didn't help much, though.

"Fuck," Edward muttered, his thrusts becoming less even, more erratic.

My teeth clamped down on Edward's neck, harder than I meant them to, as my muscles clamped around him. Once my body rode out the waves of pleasure, every muscle I had sagged, and my arms fell limply from around Edward's neck.

Edward rolled onto his back, taking me with him. After our breathing returned to normal I looked up at him and caught a dark spot on his neck.

I couldn't help but giggle. "I'm sorry," I told him, my fingers reaching up to trace the hickey already forming on his neck.

"Marking me again?" He asked. His hands slid along my back, always tracing whatever skin he could reach.

"Again?"

"You practically stuck your tongue down my throat after a woman had the audacity to give me her number, unsolicited I might add, last night."

I had a very fuzzy recollection of that. I may have had a little too much to drink early in the evening.

"She wasn't just some woman, Edward. She's one of the most sought-after models in the world."

Edward rolled us so his body pinned mine into the mattress. "She was fake. You're real and passionate and mine."

…rep…

I couldn't sleep, so I left Edward snoring in bed and stumbled down the hall to the living room.

Edward and I left Los Angeles just a few days after the Oscars, and haven't looked back since. It was May and we have spent the last two and a half months on a private island. I didn't even know where the island was, but I knew it was my favorite place in the world.

I think Edward bought it, but I couldn't get that information out of him no matter how hard I tried.

The house on the island was beautiful. All deep wood, stone, and light, beachy furniture. There was in in-deck pool on the deck out back, with a gorgeous view of the beach right in front of it. There were lounge chairs everywhere; on the deck, in the house, even on the roof. There was even a pool table on the roof, as odd as it was.

It was the perfect place for us to just be us.

I had taken to waking up in the middle of the night, though. I was so used to only getting a few hours of sleep here and there, that now I never slept. Edward's body did the opposite. He hardly got any sleep in his daily life, so now his body was catching up.

My early mornings gave me time to work, though. I had all of these lyrics and story lines bubbling around in my head, and I needed to get them straight. I was nearly done, though.

The songs were written, and I had nearly every drop and effect ingrained in my brain how I wanted it. Piecing the songs together to tell the perfect story was a bitch. I knew most people wouldn't understand every little nod to what really happened, but those closest to me would. Mostly Edward.

I hadn't told him about this yet. I didn't know what his reaction would be. It was one thing for me to make a movie about my relationship with Jacob. It was over and done by the time I did that. But Edward was here for the long haul, at least I hoped he was. He was also a private man, he had to be in his line of work.

I left out all of the things that could get him arrested, of course, but I knew that wouldn't stop people that knew about him from looking for holes in the story.

I had everything laid out in front of me. Every little paper with lyrics scribbled on them surrounded me. I looked over each one and scenes flashed through my mind. _Yes, I could do this_.

Now, I just had a script to write.

…rep…

"Harder, Bella." Edward said, his voice gruff.

I slowed my swings down, but put a little more force behind them. My hands were wrapped up in cotton wraps and Edward's were covered in little red, flat mitts.

My shoulder had been doing much better. The doctor didn't need to come out as often anymore and recommended I start doing more intense workouts to increase the strength.

Edward took it to another level, though.

I had done intense physical training in the past. My role in _Tainted_ required some physical combat training, so I was used to some grueling workouts. Edward took it to the extreme.

I knew there were ulterior motives behind him wanting to workout with me. One, he wanted me to be able to defend myself. I didn't want to think about his reasons behind that, but I knew they were there. Two, he liked seeing me all sweaty and only in a sports bra.

I was already starting to see changes in my body, and it was pretty exciting. I had always been in shape, I had to be for work. But I was never like this. I had more muscle, and even some abs that were starting to form.

Edward loved licking them.

…rep…

Two weeks later it was Edward's birthday. It was pretty impossible to get him a present. We had food delivered to us once a week by a local couple on the mainland. I think Edward sometimes ordered odds and ends, but I had no clue where he had them shipped.

So, I had to get creative for his birthday.

I had spent the last few days creating a series of clues for Edward to follow. They took him all over the house, because I needed time between each one to leave an article of my clothing for him to find. It wasn't a huge house, so I had to be careful when deciding where to put each clue so Edward and I wouldn't see each other.

I woke up early the morning of Edward's twenty-seventh birthday. _Time to put my plan into motion_. I left the first one on my pillow. When he woke up he would immediately be grumpy that I wasn't next to him. I heard him grumbling from my hiding spot, but then a little laugh after he read the note.

I followed him around while he went from clue to clue, hiding as best I could. I knew Edward was typically hyper aware of his surroundings, but if he knew I was following he never let on.

I left Edward to find the last two clues on the roof and quickly and quietly submerged myself in the pool, completely naked.

I leaned my arms on the edge and looked up at the roof, waiting to see Edward. Sure enough, about a minute later, his head popped out from the edge.

"Are you coming?" I shouted up at him.

"Oh, I'm coming."

Just a few seconds later Edward emerged from the house, losing his boxers as he walked toward the pool.

I smiled what I hoped was a sexy smirk as he approached. Once he was down a few of the steps into the pool I stopped him. I stood up, water dripping around me, and pumped his cock with my hand a few times before taking him in my mouth.

His hands pushed my damp hair out of my face and began to guide my movements along his length. It didn't last long though. I released him with a pop after just a few minutes and relaxed back into the pool.

"Happy birthday," I told him. He followed me into the pool and wrapped his arms around my waist as we floated together.

"It's been one of my better ones so far," Edward said, his eyes glowing in the early morning sun.

He was so relaxed here. He was happy and free to be himself. Edward had no stresses here and he glowed because of it. I was dreading the moment we decided to go back to reality, but I knew it was likely fast approaching.

Edward twisted my body so my back was to him and moved us so we were along the far edge of the pool, the beach view right in front of us.

"I love you," he whispered in my ear. He lifted my hips slightly under the water, and I leaned my forearms along the edge of the pool.

"I love the way you feel around my cock," he accentuated the last word by slowly entering me.

"I love it when you wake me up in the middle of the night because you want me."

Some nights, when I couldn't sleep, I decided Edward didn't need sleep either. He never complained, though.

He kept an even tempo of thrusts as he continued to whisper in my ear. "I love watching you squirm."

One of his hands crept beneath the water to play with my clit. I let out a surprised squeak.

"I do love those noises you make, too. I love how you blush when I make dirty words come out of those pretty lips of yours."

My head fell to the edge of the pool and Edward's thrusts doubled in ferocity. It wasn't long before he grunted out his release as I came around him.

Later that afternoon I was in the kitchen cutting up some fruit while Edward took a shower. I had changed into some black cotton shorts and pulled on a simple black bikini top.

I started plating the fruit when a stack of papers was tossed on the table in front of me.

"What are these?" Edward asked, his voice harsh and unwelcoming.

Shit. The script.

"It's just, uh, something I've been working on. Fruit?" I asked, holding out a piece of pineapple to him.

"This is us," Edward said. "Our story."

I nodded. "Yes, it is. Are you sure you don't want some -"

"I don't want any fucking fruit, Bella. You can't do this." Edward held up the papers.

"Excuse me?"

"You can't make a movie about us. People can't know –"

"Give me some fucking credit, Edward. I'm not putting the fact that your family is the goddamn mob in it! I don't understand why you're so upset."

"This is our life, Bella. It's no one else's business."

"My life is everyone else's business, Edward. You know that." It sucks, but was true.

"Not anymore it's not."

"And what is that supposed to mean?"

"It means you don't have to do any of that anymore. You can take other roles, and –"

"I want to do _this_. Every actor relies on other people to make their career. I've had to suck up to directors and producers for years. I've had to sit through conversations with them telling me how inadequate I am, or how I'll probably get a role because of how _fuckable_ I look." My voice started to rise the angrier I got. "I have momentum right now. No one is doing what I did and I need to keep doing it, I _want_ to keep doing it."

Edward's expression was unreadable. I couldn't tell if he was still upset or not, but I didn't really care anymore because now I was pissed.

"I know you don't understand. But those people, the ones that camp out for my movies and bought _Badlands_ and went to the shows, sometimes they're the only friends I have. I didn't grow up with a big family like you and I wasn't the most popular girl in school. I didn't have any friends growing up, but _those_ are my friends now. I owe it to them to let them into my life in any way I can."

I grabbed all of my papers off of the counter and left the kitchen. I picked up my laptop as I passed it and sequestered myself in the spare bedroom on the other side of the house. Even though it was childish, I wished there were regular doors here so I could slam it to make a point. Instead I had to deal with the silent gliding of the wooden panels.

It was hard for me to realize, sometimes, that I had people I could talk to and count on these days. Growing up I had no one. There would be days when I didn't say a single word at school. I didn't have friends, and I spent years drowning in loneliness.

Then I started acting and I had a group of the fiercest friends anyone could ask for. Those fans that have been by my side since the beginning are my friends. I didn't see them any other way.

I knew it was hard for most people to understand my thought process on that. Most celebrities enjoyed their privacy, and I do too, but I also feel the need to let them into my life as much as they've let me into theirs.

I sat on the bed and surrounded myself with all of my work. I was done letting people tell me what to do. Even Edward.

The hours passed and I didn't hear a thing from him, but I was lost in my own world, our world.

I was doing this. I had to.

It was around midnight when there was a light knock at the door. "Bella?"

I rubbed my eyes and slammed my laptop shut. Most of my anger had dissipated as I worked, but I was still a little upset at how Edward handled the situation.

I pulled the door open and Edward stood there, his hair disheveled. Probably from hours of running his fingers through it in aggravation.

"I'm sorry. I assumed some things I shouldn't have."

Edward hated to apologize, I knew it. A while ago he told me I was one of the only people he had ever apologized to. He said it showed weakness, something he rarely, if ever, did in front of others.

"You're the best at what you do, and I love your desire to continue being the best." He held up a hand when I tried to protest. "I never realized how hard it was, how much effort it took for you to get to where you are today. It's not my place to tell you what you can and can't do where your job is concerned."

Just like that, all of my anger dissolved.

"Thank you."

Edward's arms wrapped around my waist and mine around his neck. I hated fighting with him.

"Why didn't you tell me you were working on this?" He asked me.

I just shrugged. "I wanted to see if I could even do it, I guess. Then I started to get worried about how you would react." Which I now knew was a valid worry.

I couldn't blame him, though. It took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that very few parts of my life were going to be private anymore. I couldn't expect Edward to be okay with it immediately

"Do you want to see some of what I've done?"

The next few hours were filled with music and laughs. I showed Edward all of the songs I had written, and he convinced me to play them for him. They would sound completely different once they were produced, but he said he liked the acoustic versions just as much.

He seemed much more okay with the whole thing after I laid out the entire plot. There was no mention of his underground dealings, or his involvement in why I was shot. By the end of the night, he was excited to see everything come to life eventually.

The next night Edward told me to get dressed up. He decided we needed a night out, away from the island. As much as I hated to admit it, I agreed. We were starting to go a little stir crazy here.

I pulled on a dark grey, flowy cropped t shirt and a pair of black, high waisted jean shorts. It was hot as hell here, so the less clothing the better.

Edward drove us to the mainland on the boat we had docked here. I hadn't been to the mainland since we arrived and even then, I didn't see much of it. I was excited to be out and around people again.

I shouldn't have been surprised to see the car waiting for us when Edward docked the boat. He never did anything halfway.

The car took us to a small bar. It looked kind of dingy, but it had character. I liked it immediately. It was odd, getting out of the car and not having people shouting at me. I had gotten too used to all attention being on me. I hated that.

It was nice to be able to be myself outside of the confines of my home for once.

Edward pulled us through the crowd and found us a tall table in the corner. The music was loud and the people were drunk, but it was a great atmosphere.

We ate cheap bar food and drank to our hearts content. Later in the night, Edward convinced me to join him on the dance floor. Dancing didn't seem like his kind of thing, so when I jokingly suggested it I didn't think he would be so eager to accept.

I was pretty sure the song playing was about sex. I couldn't understand a word of it because it was in another language, but I could just tell. The beat was too erotic for it not to be.

Edward pulled me to him and situated one of his thighs between mine. It seemed awkward and unnatural to me. "I don't dance, Edward." I laughed. The only reason I hadn't fled was my alcohol-hazed brain.

"Yes, you do. You dance with me all of the time. Just rock your hips."

My arms hooked around Edward's neck and I let his hands glide my hips with the beat.

"I don't dance with you all of the time," I told him, but I couldn't keep the smile off of my face. This was fun, new. I liked sharing new experiences with Edward.

Edward leaned his head down and whispered in my ear. "You fuck me all of the time. Those hips know to move."

Edward's hips grinded against me and I could feel how turned on he was. _He is the most insatiable man on the planet_. One of his hands left my hips and moved to the front of my shorts. I had to push his hands away when he started to unbutton them.

"You can't do that!"

Edward ignored my protest and continued to unbutton my shorts. His hand cupped my pussy and I looked around frantically to see if anyone was watching us. Thankfully, everyone seemed lost in their own little worlds.

"We're perfect together, Bella," Edward told me as two of his fingers easily slid inside me. "You needed a little adventure, a little edge. And I needed someone to pull me off of the ledge. You're fucking perfect for me, baby."

His fingers increased their pace and his thumb put pressure on my clit. A whimper escaped my lips, but thankfully the music was too loud for anyone but Edward to hear it.

"There is nothing sexier than seeing you come. Come for me, Bella."

I had no choice but to do what he said.

Edward buttoned my shorts back up and kissed me slowly. I knew he was still apologizing. Sex was how he knew everything was okay. He equated sex with stability in a relationship, which I guess is valid sometimes. It's probably not the healthiest way of dealing with things though.

But, who was I to say what was mentally healthy?

"I'll be right back, get me another drink!" I shouted at Edward over the music. He scowled at me, so I pointed toward the bathroom.

I took care of what I needed to and was washing my hands when I heard the door open. I looked over, expecting to see a group of girls, but there was just a man standing there.

"Isabella Swan, a pleasure to finally meet you," he said.

I tensed up at the mention of my name. "I should be going,"

He started to walk toward me, a disgusting sneer on his face. "I had to meet the woman that tamed Edward Cullen."

"I'm sorry, I don't –"

He had me pushed against the counter now, and the feeling of his body pressed so closely to mine made me want to vomit. "Don't play dumb, Isabella. I saw your little… show earlier. Do you only put out for him, or is it anyone who is willing to stick their hands down your pants?"

I pushed him away but he didn't budge. I lifted my knee and quickly connected it with his groin.

The door swung open and Edward rushed in. He lifted the man off of the ground and held him against the wall by his neck.

"What the fuck are you doing here, Felix?"

"Just getting to know the woman who made you go soft."

Edward slammed his head against the wall and twisted his arm at such an odd angle I heard I heard the bone when it snapped. Edward let his body fall to the ground and turned to me.

He didn't say anything, he just grabbed my arm and pulled me out of the room.

I didn't say anything during the long journey back to the island. Even though there were about a million questions going through my mind, I didn't ask any of them. I could feel the tension rolling off of Edward, and I knew he was livid about the whole situation.

I didn't know what to make of it. It was terrifying, being cornered by a strange man, but I also knew I could take care of myself if he tried anything. Edward made sure of it.

I knew that being with Edward meant things like this could happen. I assumed that when they did they would make me run for the hills. But I wasn't scared.

I looked over at Edward, who was driving the boat back to the island. He was worth it. If he could get over losing some of his privacy, I could deal with this.

I hoped.

 **A/N: I'd love to know what you all thought of this one. See you next time!**


	4. So It Goes

_All our pieces fall right into place. Get caught up in a moment, lipstick on your face. So it goes. I'm yours to keep, and I'm yours to lose. You know I'm not a bad girl, but I do bad things with you. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **So It Goes…**_

…rep…

After the incident with Felix, Edward didn't want to stay on the island much longer. It wasn't safe, apparently. So, a few days later we went to Ireland. Edward found us an adorable little cottage that seemed to be in the middle of nowhere. We were surrounded only by the gorgeous countryside.

We hadn't been the same since the night after Edward's birthday. Our bubble away from reality had popped and neither of us knew what to do about it. Things were tense and I hated it.

I would lie in bed and stare at the man next to me and feel weighed down by crushing guilt. Every day I would watch him sit at his computer to work and think about how I caused so much trouble between him and his family. It made my stomach churn. Sometimes I would purposefully fall asleep on the couch in the living room, just so I didn't have to face him.

I was pretty sure Edward thought I was quiet because of the Felix situation. I let him believe that for the time being because it was better than him knowing what was really going through my mind.

I was my mother.

Somehow, I had turned into everything that I hated. I brought unbelievable chaos into Edward's life. I made him choose between me and his family. I let him put his life on hold to run away with me because I needed time away. He never really had a chance to say no when I dragged him to the Vanity Fair after party. And I practically forced him to be okay with me making a movie about our life.

He should hate me. I hate me. He still whispers that he loves me every night though, before he goes off to sleep in the bedroom alone.

Tonight, though, he carried me from the couch and situated me on the bed. When he got in beside me, he wrapped me in his arms and placed the softest kiss on my forehead. His tenderness made me want to scream. To tell him to leave me because I didn't deserve him.

I just laid there and pretended to be asleep. After waiting until I could hear Edward's breath even out, I got up and went to take a shower. The shower had been my sanctuary ever since I was a kid, because in the shower no one could hear you cry.

So, I turned on the shower, stripped off my clothes, and let all of the guilt from the day wash over me so I could do it all again tomorrow. The spray trickled over me as I sat on the floor, my knees pulled to my chest, and cried for as long as the hot water lasted.

I stood up and turned the water off. When I pulled the curtain back to get out, Edward was leaning against the counter, his arms crossed over his chest.

"What are you doing?" I asked him. I tried to keep my voice strong, but I knew it was obvious I had just been crying from the way it cracked. Even the shower couldn't hide that.

"You come in here to cry a lot." He told me. His eyes were sad and tired. The happy, glowing Edward from the island was long gone. "I usually leave before you get out. I don't like you crying alone."

 _Fuck._ Guilt crushed my chest. He was too good to me. He should hate me.

"What's wrong, Bella?" It was a simple question, but there were so many answers to it I didn't know where to begin.

I pulled on a thin, grey cotton robe and averted my eyes from Edward. I walked past him to the bedroom. I had every intention of going back to the couch to continue my avoidance of the issues, but Edward grabbed my arm before I could leave the bedroom.

"No. Talk to me, Bella. I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong."

I could tell he was trying to be patient with me. He was trying to keep his voice calm but I knew he was frustrated. It wasn't hard to make him lose his temper, but I knew he always tried to keep a level head with me. Yet another reason I didn't deserve him.

Then the floodgates opened.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled. "I'm sorry I'm so selfish. You've done… everything for me. You abandoned your family. You left work behind for months. You put your life on the line for me, and what have I done for you?

"I forced you to be okay with a movie about your private life. I don't have the right to do that. I _won't_ do that. I forced you to choose between your family and me. What kind of person does that?"

I pulled my arm out of Edward's, because I didn't deserve to feel the comfort of his skin on mine. "I don't know how you can even look at me and not be consumed with hate. Because you know what? I'm my fucking mother."

Throughout my whole rant, Edward just stood there. His expression was unreadable, the only emotion clear was concern. He probably thought I was insane. Which, I guessed, was pretty true.

"All my mother cared about growing up was her happiness. If she wanted to do something, we did it. If she wanted to go on vacation to California, my father made it happen.

"I just, I didn't even fucking realize it, Edward! How long have I been like this? How long have I been just as terrible as her? She's, shit, she was the reason I never wanted children before."

Some emotion finally broke through Edward's face. I had never told him I never wanted kids. His forehead creased and his mouth opened, probably to interrupt me but I never gave him the chance.

"I didn't want to fuck up a kid like she fucked me up. I thought I could never do that to someone else but here I am, doing it to you."

Edward tried to approach me, but I backed away. I bumped into the wall behind me and let myself slide down, resting my arms on my knees.

"I can't even look at you anymore because I just get crushed with guilt. I'm just – I'm _so sorry_ , Edward." I leaned my head on my arms and squeezed my eyes shut. I couldn't look at the disappointment in his eyes.

A had was on my cheek, lifting my head up, but I fought it. "Look at me, Bella." Edward said. I didn't move. "Damnit Bella, look at me."

I winced at is harsh tone, but lifted my head up and opened my eyes to look at him. My heart skipped a beat seeing his face so close to mine, it always did. But now it was always followed by crippling sadness.

"You are not your mother. Everything you do is to make other people happy. Those movies and songs, they're not just for you. You write them so other kids going through what you did don't feel alone."

I shook my head at him and started to drop it again, but Edward cupped his hand under my chin and forced me to keep eye contact with him.

"No, listen. You're career driven, it's one of the things I love about you. You want to have a long, prosperous career and there is nothing wrong with that. It doesn't make you selfish, it makes you passionate. If the movie still bothered me, I would let you know.

"Don't ever think you haven't done anything for me, Bella. Before I met you, I was on a… bad path. I was getting cocky and thought I was invincible. I didn't care about the consequences of what I was doing and I didn't care who I hurt in the process. I did some stupid shit, but that all stopped the second I found you.

"I had a goal, an end game I needed to play out. And I couldn't get there if I kept going in the direction I was.

"You didn't make me choose between you and my family, they're still waiting for me back home."

Edward cupped my face with both of his hands and wiped the tears off of my cheeks. "I'm no relationship expert, but I'm pretty sure they're about give and take. I hold you up when you need help, and you do the same for me."

"You don't… you don't hate me?"

"I could _never_ hate you. When I look at you I see a woman who has worked non-stop since she was seventeen, a woman filled with kindness and compassion. Please, don't ever think I hate you."

Edward pulled me into his arms and switched our spots so he was sitting against the wall with me in his lap. I didn't know how long we sat there, but eventually I fell into the most peaceful sleep I had in weeks.

The next morning, I woke up alone. I vaguely remembered Edward lifting us off of the ground and putting both of us in bed, but that was it.

I tightened my robe around my waist and got up to search for Edward. I followed the scent of freshly made coffee out to the small deck, and there he was. His back was to me, and he had a cup of coffee sitting on the old wooden banister.

I looked at him for a minute, just stared at him while he looked across the countryside. He seemed very deep in thought, and I hated to interrupt. But, eventually I walked over and hooked my arm with his and rested my head on his shoulder.

"I need to go back to Chicago."

Oh. _Oh_. I finally drove him off. Edward must have seen the look of despair on my face, because he continued, "I'd like you to come with me."

"Is there a reason why you have to go back?"

"Just some work that needs to be taken care of, nothing for you to worry about." Edward dropped a quick kiss to the top of my head. "So, will you come with me? At least for a while, before you start back up with work again?"

"Of course. I don't really know what I'm doing next. I'll have Heidi send me some –"

"You're making your movie. _Our_ movie," Edward said very matter-of-factly.

"No, I'm not."

I was not going to do that to him. He would lose what little privacy he had left after word got out we were together.

"Yes, you are. You've done amazing work on it, Bella. It should be shared with the world."

"I can't ask you to share all of your private business with the world. I signed up for that, you didn't. People send me twenty roles a day, I'll be fine."

Edward pulled me to him, sandwiching me between the banister and his body. His arms rested on the banister on either side of me, and his smirking face looked down at me. "Bella, you were nearly killed because of my job. You making a film about us is hardly equivalent to that. Do you hold the shooting against me?"

"No, of course not."

"So, you're going to do your job and I'm going to be right next to you, supporting you in any way that I can, because I know you'll do the same for me."

I wrapped my arms around his waist and laid my head on his chest. I matched my breathing with his heartbeat. "Vacation has made you very wise."

Later that afternoon, things were starting to get back to normal between the two of us. I sat on the couch next to Edward reading a book on my iPad while Edward made our travel arrangements to go back to the states.

"I should probably visit my parents. I promised my dad I would when we got back." I mentioned to him. I could feel the tension thicken up the room.

"I'll go with you. We can stop there before we head to Chicago."

"You don't have to. I'll only stay a day or two."

"I don't want you there alone."

…rep…

Edward drove the large Range Rover through the forests of Washington with ease. I looked over at him and couldn't help but feel incredibly thankful. Despite all of my freak outs, and all of the baggage he knows comes with me, he's still here. He's still happily here.

"Thank you."

Edward gave me a quick glance before turning his eyes back on the road. "For what?"

"For never giving up on me."

Edward pulled my hand up to his lips and gave my knuckles a soft kiss. There had been so many bumps in our relationship lately. The movie, the man in the bar, my meltdown in Ireland… and then the fact that my father was a former cop and could recognize Edward for his less than legal business dealings.

We talked about it on the flight, and Edward told me there was a very good chance Charlie would have heard of him. Even though Charlie retired early about two years ago, he still kept in touch with his cop buddies.

Edward said they were just rumors to most people, though. If anyone had definitive proof of their dealings they would all be in prison.

That wasn't as comforting and I think he meant it to be.

I had called Charlie before we left Ireland and he was excited to see me for a couple days. When I told him that I was bringing a boyfriend he seemed to tense up a little, but seemed glad either way.

I had never brought a boy home before. Ever.

This was entirely new territory for all of us. Especially Edward. He had never met a girls' parents either. Apparently, he was always the boy girls would hide from their parents.

Edward also convinced me I should probably tell my parents about the complications I had during my surgery. I knew he was right, it was wrong of me to keep something so big from them, but I needed time to come to terms with it on my own before I told them.

I hadn't fully come to terms with it myself, but I was getting there. Kind of.

It was late when we arrived, nearing midnight. International flights were a bitch on the internal clock, so neither of us were tired at all. I was hoping to make quick conversation with my parents and then fake tiredness and head to bed. I thought small doses of my parents would be a good way to ease Edward into them, especially my mother.

I didn't know if I would be quick enough to stop him from shooting her if she said something stupid. I knew he always had a weapon on him… somewhere.

"It's a lovely house," Edward said as he grabbed our luggage out of the car.

"Thank you," I replied automatically. He gave me an odd look so I explained, "I bought it."

"You bought your parents a house?"

"I bought them a new place and paid off all of their debt, including my sister's collage loans," I shrugged.

Before Edward could say anything else Charlie came out to greet us. "Bells!"

Charlie gave me an out of character, enthusiastic hug. I didn't question it though, I just hugged him just as tight.

"Dad, this is my boyfriend, Edward Cullen."

I watched Charlie's reaction when I said Edward's name, but he didn't give any indication that he knew who he was.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Swan," Edward said, holding his hand out for Charlie.

"You taking care of my little girl?" Charlie asked, his eyes narrowed on Edward.

"As best I can," Edward said sincerely. His answer must have been enough for Charlie, because he gripped Edward's hand in a firm shake.

"Let's get you two inside, you must be exhausted." Charlie helped Edward bring in the luggage.

"Where's mom?" I asked when we got inside.

"She fell asleep a while ago. She'll be excited to see you in the morning, Bells."

Figures.

"I think we're just going to head to bed. Thanks for waiting up, dad," I gave him another hug and started to trek up the stairs. I didn't bother trying to be quiet.

I turned into the room I usually stayed in and waited for Edward to follow me.

"Well, uh, goodnight," Charlie said, shuffling off to his bedroom.

"Should I sleep –"

"You should sleep here. I bought the house, they're hardly in a position to say you can't sleep in my room. Which, isn't technically 'my room.' My mother loves to call it the guest room."

I tossed my shoes in the corner and collapsed on the bed. The days of traveling to get here were starting to take their toll, but I also knew I needed a shower before I could get a good night of sleep.

"I need a shower," I grumbled, but burrowed further into the bed. _So comfy_.

Edward lifted me off of the bed and threw me over his shoulder. It left me with a wonderful view of his ass. He carried me into the adjoining bathroom and set me on the counter.

He stood between my legs and looked at me. I could feel myself blush at his stare, and distracted myself by lifting his t-shirt over his head. Our clothing was shed one piece at a time and it wasn't long before we were standing under the hot spray of the shower.

We took turns washing each other, but nothing ever turned sexual. It hadn't since the island. Things were just… wrong between us then. I knew my parents' house wasn't the place to resume those kinds of activities, but it felt nice to be close to Edward again.

"I love you," I told him as he leaned my head back under the spray to rinse out my hair.

"I love you," he replied, giving me a slow, passionate kiss that said more than any words ever could.

I sat on the bed the next morning and waited for Edward to get dressed. I threw on a pair of yoga pants and a cream sweater. Edward was rolling up the sleeves of a dark blue button down when he laughed at me.

"What?"

"You shouldn't be so nervous in your own home."

I shrugged. "It's not really mine."

We walked downstairs hand in hand. My parents were in the kitchen, cooking from the sounds of it.

"Hey, you two. You sleep okay?" Charlie asked.

"Yes, thank you," Edward replied.

"Mom, this is my boyfriend, Edward," I told her.

She looked up from the eggs she was cooking and gave Edward a pleasant smile. "It's nice to meet you, Edward." She said.

Huh. Odd response, but I supposed it could have been worse.

We all sat down at the table as they finished breakfast. I folded my napkin in my lap and Edward squeezed my thigh comfortingly.

"So, where did you guys travel?" Charlie asked.

"We spent a lot of time on a private island. It was beautiful," I told him. We got into an easy conversation with Charlie about the places we had been. He and Edward talked a lot about Ireland, and Edward told him about his family's tradition of going there for St. Patrick's Day every year. I guess they went without him this time.

I couldn't understand my mother. She was never silent like this, she always had something to say about everything. Why had she chosen now to show a little respect?

After breakfast Edward and I went for a walk around town. Nobody here cared about who I was, I had known most of them since I was a kid, so it was nice to be out and not have to worry about prying eyes.

I walked him past where I went to high school, even though I hated every minute there. I showed him where we would always have dinner at The Lodge. It was nice to just talk and not worry about anything else.

We got back home late in the afternoon, and Edward and Charlie bonded over some game on television. I helped my mother in the kitchen, and she was just as quiet as she was earlier.

It was driving me crazy by the time we sat down to dinner. I knew I should enjoy it, but I couldn't. _What was her issue?_

"What are you doing when you get back to Los Angeles, Bells?" Charlie asked me.

"I'm actually going to Chicago with Edward for a while."

My mother huffed. Here we go.

"What?" I asked her.

"It just took you finding a man to quit. I would've thought nearly dying would have done it."

"She's not quitting." Edward said, his voice firm. "She's working on another project, similar to _Badlands_."

"That's great," Charlie tried to cut in, hoping to dissolve some of the tension I'm sure.

"Oh, please. You've always been desperate for attention, Bella. That's why you picked up this whole acting thing. Now you have a rich boyfriend to give you attention, so you're quitting."

My stomach dropped. I couldn't believe this woman was my mother. I couldn't believe I survived seventeen years living under her care.

"You know what? Yeah, maybe part of the reason I love my job is because people pay attention to me. Lord knows I never received any from you growing up."

"You had a lovely childhood, Bella. Don't throw that in my face."

"Lovely? I had no one! You and Jane were always off together while Charlie was at work and I was all alone."

"It was better than what it could have been! You should be grateful we took you in!" Renee shouted at me.

Took me in? That didn't make any sense.

"Renee! That's enough." Charlie snapped.

"No, what does she mean? Took me in?" I looked to my father, desperate for answers. I knew he was the only one who would give them to me.

Charlie looked so sad. His mustache was practically frowning. "When I was patrolling one night, I found you. You were just a few hours old and someone had just – they left you in a trash can in the park.

"We never found your parents. We agreed to foster you for a while, but I couldn't let you get tossed in the system. I knew what happened to kids there."

I was frozen. My mind was moving too fast for me to understand any of my thoughts. My heart was beating too fast and my ears were ringing so loud I couldn't hear anything else.

"You're… not my parents."

Charlie looked like I had just slapped him across the face. "Biologically, no."

"I've spent my whole life trying to be good enough for you." I looked at the woman at the table across from me. "I bought you this goddamn house, paid off all of your debt, I deposit $300,000 into your bank accounts every year. But, no matter what I did, you always hated me. I fucked up your perfect little family, huh? A literal piece of trash you had to bring in and take care of."

Charlie reached across the table and tried to grab my hand. "Bella – "

"Don't fucking touch me." I stood up from the table. My head was dizzy but I managed to stay on my feet. "We need to go." I told Edward.

He quickly got up and kept a hand around my waist as we went upstairs. I started tossing things into bags, I don't know what I took or where I put it, but I needed out of here.

My hands started shaking uncontrollably and my breath began to come in pants. Edward walked over to me and pulled me into him. He cupped the back of my head and held me to his chest. "Just a few more minutes. Just keep it together for a few more minutes and then were gone."

Edward grabbed our bags and took them downstairs, and I followed closely behind. They were standing in the foyer in front of the door. She looked happy. Relieved, probably. He looked sad, ashamed. I didn't care though.

"Move," Edward said. His voice was cold and demanding. It wasn't a voice you disobeyed.

They got out of his way, and I followed as closely behind him as I could.

I held it together better than I would have thought I was able to. Tears fell as Edward drove us out of the town I once thought was my home, but it wasn't a complete breakdown. I was too numb for that.

Edward held my hand in his while he drove to Seattle. He called and made a hotel reservation, I think, but that was it.

The hours we spent in the car on the way to Seattle were spent going over every interaction I could remember with my parents, looking for any signs I could find that might have clued me into this sooner. Was I so naïve that I couldn't even tell my parents weren't my parents?

Edward checked us into the hotel and I waited in the car. It was one, almost two in the morning. I wasn't as tired as I should have been though. I was defeated. Alone.

I had no one left.

Edward led me up to the suite he booked for us. It was a luxurious suite, because I noticed a Four Seasons logo as we walked up, but it wasn't like the one we had in New York City. This one was more simple, smaller.

I sat on the edge of the bed and just stared at the wall in front of me.

Edward approached me slowly, and kneeled in front of me. His hands rubbed gently at my thighs, trying to comfort me in any way he could.

"I don't have anyone." I said, my voice cracking slightly.

"You've got me. You'll always have me." Edward told me.

It made me want to cry, but I didn't think I had any tears left. Edward and I, forever. That was all that mattered.

I leaned down and kissed him. It was a desperate kiss, full of need; need to be wanted, need to be someone's priority, need be loved. I slid off of the bed and into Edward's lap, never breaking our kiss.

"Bella, we should talk –"

"No, please. We can talk later. Right now, I just, I need to know you love me." I was getting dangerously close to losing it again, and I needed Edward to keep me grounded. I needed to know I had him no matter what.

Edward spent the rest of the night doing exactly that. His body melted with mine over and over again, and the feeling of his skin pressed against mine was the only thing that held me together.

It was hours later when we finally wore our bodies out. We were a mass of tangled limbs and I didn't really know where Edward stopped and I began. Our kisses were languid, our bodies too tired to turn them into much more than gentle nips and tugs.

"I don't… I don't know what I'm supposed to do now." I admitted to Edward.

Edward's hand wove through my hair, pushing it out of my face. "You'll come with me to Chicago. You'll finish your movie. You'll live your life for you, not for the approval of Renee or Charlie."

It didn't go unnoticed by me that he didn't call them my parents. Because they weren't. I didn't have parents anymore.

…rep…

Alice, Jasper, and Emmett were at Edward's penthouse when we arrived. We had dinner and talked about our vacation. It was a similar conversation to the one we had with Charlie and Renee just two days ago, but this one didn't end with my life being turned upside down.

"So, what are you doing next, Bella?" Alice asked.

I looked over at Edward and he gave me a nod and a smirk. Okay, then. "I'm actually going to make another visual album, like _Badlands_."

"Wow, really?" Jasper asked, his interest piqued. It made me smile.

"Oh, about you and Edward?" Alice asked and I nodded. "How romantic! Oh, am I in it? Who should play me? Let's see…"

"Slow down, Alice. I still need to get a lot of things in order to even see if I can make it happen. I need to meet with Netflix, because this time they'll actually have to pay me."

We had an odd agreement last time, because I had to fund everything myself. After the success of Welcome to the Badlands they did pretty much tell me that if I ever wanted to do another one they were in, but I still needed to get a deal going.

"So, I guess that means you won't be here for long then, huh?" Emmett asked. He had come along to dinner, thankfully, because I didn't have the energy to deal with Rosalie. He said she was at some spa, I think.

"I have to record the album first, and there are plenty of places to do that here. I just need to convince my producers to take a little vacation to Chicago."

Things started to move very fast after that night. I got the green light to make the album from Peter and the label. Some of my favorite producers from before flew in and helped me get started. I spent twelve hours a day for a solid month in the studio, perfecting everything.

Edward and I had a routine. We would both get up around five, he would shower for work and I would attempt to make us something for breakfast. Edward would leave for work after breakfast and then I would get ready and go to the studio. I would get home around seven, and Edward usually not long after me. He always had food delivered for us.

We had our own little happy life here, and I loved it. Finishing the album let me keep my mind off of other not-so-pleasant things, and Edward did a good job of distracting me when I wasn't working.

I had video conferences whenever I had meetings in Los Angeles, because I couldn't handle going back there yet. I had signed on the dotted line with Netflix, and the movie was officially in pre-production. Everything was different this time, because I didn't have to do so much of it myself to save costs.

I had a team location scouting, I had more set designers and a high end wardrobe team. I had everything I needed.

Alice actually helped me with casting. We spent a lot of nights watching clips of movies online, looking for the perfect people. I didn't want a cast full of big names, I wanted to help younger, newer actors get their chance.

I got to see Jasper and Emmett a lot, too. They were often over late with Edward, discussing things I didn't want to know about, but they were quickly becoming brothers to me. Emmett had taken to finding old photoshoot shots of me and sticking them up in random spots around the apartment. It was frustrating as hell, but I think it was his way of welcoming me into the family. He was the prankster of the bunch, and it was his way of accepting me.

Jasper often asked me about the processes behind making a movie. He seemed genuinely interested in it, and we would spend a long time discussing films and certain scenes and how they were created.

I hadn't seen Carlisle, Esme, or Rosalie since we had been back. I didn't mind, though. I was sure Carlisle had turned Esme against me, and I didn't really feel like dealing with their judgement.

It was early August by the time I had a finished album in my hands. We were going to start shooting the movie next week. I had as much scheduled to shoot in Chicago as I could, there were some great old warehouses that were easily converted into stages where we could build our own sets. I would have to go to Los Angeles for a few weeks eventually though.

I got finished early and met Ben at the car around noon. He had been driving me wherever I needed to go. I knew his job was to protect me, but I felt better about just seeing him as a friend driving me wherever I needed.

"Can you take me to Edward's office?" I asked him. I had never been to his actual office. I saw it on skype a few times while I was on tour, but that was it. I was too excited, too hopped up on adrenaline at holding the finished music in my hands to go home alone.

"Of course," Ben said, and we were off.

It didn't take long for him to park right in front of a giant, shiny skyscraper right in the middle of the city. _Wow_. Ben walked with me into the building, and we rode the elevator to the thirtieth floor.

Everything was pristine. The walls were dark blue, and the desks a stark white. There were people everywhere, frantically working, but I wouldn't have expected anything less. Edward liked perfection.

Ben and I walked up to what appeared to be a reception desk, and I took a quick look at myself. I was completely underdressed to be here. The women around me were in smart business attire, and I was in a pair of ripped jeans and a flowy white tank top. The woman behind the front desk didn't even look up as we approached.

"I'm here to see Edward Cullen." I told her.

"Do you have an appointment?" She asked, still not bothering to look up from her computer.

"No, I -"

"Then you can't see him."

"Jessica! I told you I needed that information two hours ago. Where the fuck –"

Edward emerged from his office to yell at the poor girl who seemed to be his secretary. She looked absolutely terrified, and I felt for her. He stopped his yelling when he saw me standing at the front desk.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, a surprised smile on his face. He looked at the girl he was just yelling at, "Thirty minutes and then I need those files." He told her.

She looked at me as soon as he had walked past her and mouthed 'thank you' at me. It made me smile.

"I came to see you, I hope you don't mind. I don't have an appointment…"

"She doesn't need one." Edward scolded the receptionist.

"Of course, sir."

Edward wrapped his arm around my waist and tugged me back toward his office. Ben took a seat in the waiting area.

"What are you doing here?" Edward asked again once we were in the privacy of his office. I was too distracted to answer.

His office was stunning. Crisp, white walls and a big dark wooden desk took up most of the space. But there was also a sitting area with a couch and coffee table there too. It was bigger than the room I grew up in.

"Wow, this is beautiful," I told him, walking over to run my hands along his desk.

Edward came up and pinned me between the desk and his body. His lips attached themselves to my neck and it took everything in me not to moan.

"This isn't… I didn't come here for this." I breathed out as one of his hands started to travel toward my shorts.

Edward sighed, but smiled down at me.

I pulled the jewel case out of my purse and handed it to him. "I finished. I wanted you to be the first to listen. You don't have to do it now, I know you're busy. I just wanted you to have it." My words started coming out too fast. I didn't realize how nervous I would be to have Edward listen to the album. All of these songs were about us. How we met… how we fell in love. It was terrifying.

Edward carefully took the case from my hands and studied the track list written on the back. He looked at me with a mischievous smile. "Let's go."

"What?"

Edward grabbed a few things off of his desk and pulled me to the door. "Let's go."

"Where are we going?" I asked him. He just tugged me out of his office.

"I'll be back tomorrow morning." He told his secretary as we passed. She looked incredibly relieved.

I got an odd glare from the receptionist before the elevator doors closed around us. "Are you going to tell me where we're going now? I didn't mean to take you from work, I just wanted to tell you –"

Edward interrupted me with a firery but quick kiss. We reached the underground garage and he pulled me toward his black car. I immediately started to go to the passenger side, but Edward led me to the other side of the car. "You drive."

"Me?"

"I'll need to focus on this. I'll tell you where to go, just get in."

I unlocked the car and got myself situated in the tiny space. I had driven sports cars before, but I knew this car was expensive as hell. I didn't want to get a scratch on it, so I spent a while figuring out how everything worked.

Edward laughed at my nervousness. "You'll be fine. _Drive_."

So, I did. I drove Edward and I out of the city, and Edward navigated us to some deserted back roads. We only passed a car or two out here. It was very peaceful. Once we were out of the city Edward put the CD in and turned the volume up practically as high as it would go.

I wanted to watch his face as he listened, but I had to focus on the road in front of me. Every time I peeked over, he had his head resting back and his eyes closed, a soft smile on his lips.

We had been driving through deserted roads for about an hour before the album was over. Once the last song ended, Edward told me to pull over.

Edward moved his seat back as far as it could go, which wasn't very far. He pulled my arm and I knew what he wanted. It took me some maneuvering, but I managed to get myself situated in his lap.

"That was… fucking amazing, Bella. Shit, I lived through it and you just… made it sound like it felt."

"Are you sure you're okay with this? Just say the word and I won't…"

"I'm fine. I'm very proud of you." He told me with his voice, and his eyes. He looked at me like I was the most magnificent thing, the most extravagant treasure.

…rep…

Filming was going almost too smoothly. It felt good to get back to what I truly loved. There was nothing like the thrill of hearing _action_ and completely transforming into someone else. Although, there wasn't much transforming for this one for me. It was still a high, though.

Even though we were both busy, Edward and I were as solid as ever. Flowers would be waiting for me nearly once a week in my dressing room. We were good about making sure we still had time to see each other, even if that just meant collapsing into bed and talking for thirty minutes before we fell asleep.

I had never felt as connected with someone. I knew, one hundred percent, that I could rely on Edward for anything. I could go to him and tell him I murdered someone and he would help me clean up my mess. Of course, that was kind of his job I think, but still.

We would do anything for each other. It was an amazing feeling, knowing I had that kind of companionship in my life.

Today was my birthday, but I decided to treat it like any other day. I didn't think my birth was much to celebrate. My actual parents, whoever they may be, weren't excited about it. The woman who was supposed to be my mother was never excited about it. Charlie tried his hardest, but who knew if any of that was real?

I told Edward I didn't want to do anything. I just hoped he listened.

I was already in a bad mood when I woke up. I had a four am call time, so I was awake before Edward for once. I got ready as quietly as possible, but when I exited the bathroom Edward was sitting up in bed.

"Hey," I whispered. Something about it being three in the morning made me feel like I needed to whisper.

"I know you don't want to –"

"I don't."

Edward sighed. I knew he loved giving me presents, but I didn't want anything to celebrate this day. He got up from bed and kissed me gently. "Have a good day."

I didn't. Everything that could go wrong, did. Nothing felt right. Everything seemed forced and unnatural and I hated every take we did. It wasn't just me, everyone seemed off. Maybe it was just because I was in such a bad mood.

I got home around six and all I wanted was some greasy food and Edward. I threw my bag on the front table. "Edward?" I shouted.

There was no answer. Figured.

When I went to the kitchen for a glass of water, a note was popped up on the center of the island.

 _Clothes are waiting for you in our room. Ben will bring you to me at seven._

Edward's elegant script was printed across the paper. I wanted to be upset with him, but I couldn't. He just wanted me to have a special day, so I did what the note said.

The dress waiting for me was deep maroon. The front stopped around my knees, and gradually flowed to the ground as it wrapped around my legs. The layers of fabric flowed easily. Once I was dressed I slipped on a pair of nude heels that wrapped up my ankle. I fastened the bracelet that Edward got me for my birthday last year around my wrist and went to wait for Ben.

He was on time, of course, and we were quickly off to our unknown destination. I was starting to really learn my way around the city, but we weren't going anywhere that I recognized.

The car stopped and Ben helped me out. I still had no clue where I was. A fancy hotel was in front of me. Did he get us another suite? I could go for trashing another suite. It might help my mood.

Ben led me through the front door and the lobby was surprisingly empty. There wasn't even anyone at the front desk. _Weird_.

Ben stopped at a pair of double doors and held it open for me. I gave him a questioning look, but he just shrugged. No clues for me, then.

I walked into a large ballroom. It seemed vaguely familiar. There was a single table sitting in the middle of the room, and the marble floor was covered in what had to be thousands of deep red rose petals.

Assuming my spot was one of the two chairs at the empty table, I made my way over to it. My heels echoed loudly in the empty room.

I sat at the table and looked around. I felt like I was missing some kind of clue. The doors opened again and Edward was there. He was in an impeccable black suit. _God, he's gorgeous_.

He walked over to me, his eyes never leaving mine once. As he approached I had a flash of him doing this exact same thing, but the room was more crowded and Emmett was by his side. _This was where the police benefit was. This was where we met_.

Edward sat in the chair next to me gracefully. "You look beautiful."

"Thank you for the dress," I told him, playing with the hem.

He grabbed my nervous hands and wrapped them in his. "I'd give you anything you could ever want."

I smiled at him, because I knew it was true.

Edward took a deep breath before he started speaking. "I knew you wouldn't like your birthday. I know your upbringing wasn't great, and I know it's even harder to think about now. But, to me, today is the most important day of the year. I couldn't let it go by without celebrating."

Oh, please don't let people pop out and shout surprise.

"I was hoping I could erase all of the bad memories, and maybe make a few better ones."

Edward pushed his chair back and kneeled at my feet.

 _Oh_.

 _Oh_.

 _Oh_.

My eyes got wide, and could swear Edward could hear my heart pounding in my chest.

"I love you. I love your drive and passion, and I love the way your nose scrunches up when you laugh. I could list a thousand things I love about you, but I know you'd hate it. Just know that no one has ever loved anyone as completely as I love you, Bella Swan."

Edward reached into his coat pocket. He pulled out a shiny black box and my heart stopped.

"Will you marry me?"

I think he opened the box, but my eyes were glued to his face. He looked adorably nervous. But the sincerity of his words was evident on his face. There was no way I would ever refuse him.

" _Yes_."

His smile was blinding, and I was sure I had a matching one on my face. He was on his feet and had me wrapped in his arms within a second. I was going to have his arms wrapped around me for the rest of my life.

I was going to be Mrs. Edward Cullen.

 **A/N: I was really impressed with some of your reviews on the last chapter – a lot of you caught on to some of Bella's underlying issues, a lot of which are now out in the open.**

 **This turned out to be a monster of a chapter, but I hated to split it up. Things just got kinda crazy and I went with it! Sorry it took a little longer to get it posted.**

 **As always, thank you for the reviews and all of the follows/favorites. I hope you like this one – see you next time!**


	5. King Of My Heart

_Late in the night, the city's asleep. Your love is a secret I'm hoping, dreaming, dying to keep. Change my priorities, the taste of your lips is my idea of luxury. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **King Of My Heart**_

…rep…

I was never one of those girls who had their whole wedding planned by the time they were ten. I never imagined myself in a big white dress walking down the aisle toward my prince charming. I didn't have centerpieces picked out, and I didn't know what song my first dance would be to. I think I was just too scared to imagine those things, because I was afraid they would never happen for me.

The fear of never finding someone to spend my life with, the fear of constant loneliness kept me from ever thinking about a wedding.

But things have changed a lot since then.

The room around me was a mess. My dress was hanging off of the dresser, and parts of Edward's suit were scattered across the floor. We were in such a frenzy when we got in last night, that I didn't even remember how the clothes got off, just that once we were skin to skin everything felt right.

Now, everything just felt sore. But in a good way.

I lay tucked into Edward's bed, only the sheet left to cover us. Looking down at my left hand, I inspected the new ring on my finger. I held my hand up at every possible angle and watched as the small bit of light from the window reflected off of it.

The oval diamond in the center of the ring was just… massive. It had a halo of smaller diamonds surrounding it that made it look even bigger than it already was. It took up nearly the whole top of my finger. The band had two smaller strips of diamonds intertwining around my finger.

I knew some people would probably consider it gaudy or over the top, but I loved it. I loved the weight of it on my hand and how it reminded me of Edward every time I felt it. I loved the way it sparkled in the sun. I loved what it represented.

Quiet chuckles brought me out of my ring-induced fantasy. _Busted_.

"Do you like it?" Edward asked me. He sleepily rolled over and nearly squished me with his weight. Most of his body was now covering mine as his arm wrapped around me.

"I love it." I told him sincerely. I placed my left hand on his chest, just wanting to feel his skin under mine, but I got distracted by the pretty diamond against his skin.

Edward's lips surprised mine in a quick kiss, distracting me from my ring. He hovered over me, his forehead resting against mine and his hips grinding his cock against where I wanted him most.

"I don't want a long engagement." I breathed out as he easily slid inside my slick folds. I was sore, but it didn't take much to make me want him again. It never did.

His thrusts were slow, but deep. His lips matching his pace against mine. My arms wrapped around his back, holding him to me with all of my strength.

"I want you to be my husband," I whispered against his lips. He didn't respond verbally, but I knew he heard me. His hips faltered slightly, but then recovered with a sharper, harder thrust.

"I want to be your wife." I told him. He groaned against my lips and his hips began a frantic pace.

Edward's lips moved to my neck and began nipping at my skin. His hands grabbed whatever skin they could reach; my arms, my breasts, my ass, everything was fair game.

Just a few hard thrusts later every muscle in my body clenched around him, and I could feel Edward's tense with his release as well.

It was much later that afternoon when we finally got out of bed. Neither of us had to work today; Edward usually tried to take off days he knew I was free, because I was typically filming seven days a week. I had today off because I was going to Los Angeles tomorrow for two weeks.

Neither of us were very happy about it.

"Does anyone know?" I asked Edward as he carried two cups of coffee over to me on the couch. I took the cup from him carefully, and smiled at the small clink my ring made as it hit the mug. _We're engaged_.

"Not that it happened. I asked Charlie for your hand before our last night there."

That made me sigh. _Charlie_. I didn't have a lot of free time lately, but he had been nagging at me in the back of my mind. He tried to call me once a week, but I never answered. Jane had also tried to call me a few times, but I ignored her, too.

I knew I was probably being petty, but a lifetime of lies was a lot to come to terms with. I would have to deal with that whole mess sooner or later, but not today. Today was about celebrating.

"I meant what I said before," I told Edward, smiling over at him as he read the newspaper next to me.

"Which was?"

"That I don't want to wait a long time. I don't want a big, fancy wedding in front of five hundred people. Just close family and maybe a few friends."

The more I thought about it, the more I realized I had no clue how to plan a wedding. Centerpieces, menus, guest lists… God, that sounded like a lot of work.

Edward must have been able to see the panic start to invade. "I'm sure Alice would love nothing more than to help plan." He offered. Yes, Alice would know what to do.

The mention of Alice brought his family to my mind. "Your family doesn't like me."

Edward sighed. "They don't dislike you, Bella. They just would have preferred I marry a woman who would make better business sense than one I actually loved."

"But, Carlisle..."

"Carlisle is getting old and paranoid. He's not going to be in charge forever, and I'll be taking over for him. He had a fantasy of joining forces with Volturi. It was a weak move, though. I never supported him with it and he was bitter and took that out on you."

"So, did they try to set you up with someone else? Once they knew we were together?"

"Just once. I put an end to it."

I frowned. I didn't like that.

"I've talked to him about you since we've been back. He realizes that you're not going anywhere, and that he needs to treat you with respect. He thought he still had a chance of getting between us, that's why he tried to push so many buttons."

I didn't know what to make of that. Carlisle said some horrible things to me that day in New York City. But I supposed they made sense if he wanted Edward to be part of a bigger deal. It was fucked up, putting a 'business' deal in front of your own son's happiness. But a lot about the way the Cullen's did things was fucked up.

"What about the whole, uh, children thing?" I asked.

"I'm not the only Cullen who can continue on the line. I know Em and Rose plan on having children. There will be plenty of kids to pass on the business to."

"But aren't you –"

Edward shook his head. "It doesn't matter, Bella."

"I'm sorry." It felt like my fault. It was like I was defective. I should be able to give him children.

"There's nothing to be sorry for, Bella." His words were sincere and final. I knew he hated me apologizing for something that was out of my control, but I couldn't help it.

"So, I guess we should tell your family then?"

Edward smiled. "Yes, we should."

I was still getting dressed when everyone arrived later that night. I quickly pulled on a burgundy sweater and dark jeans and called it a day. I looked down at my hand for the millionth time today and smiled. I took a deep breath and went downstairs to greet everyone. _Here we go._

Alice, Jasper, and Emmett all greeted me with smiles and quick hugs. Rosalie was here, and gave me an odd, forced smile. That was new. Carlisle, surprisingly, gave me what seemed to be a genuine smile. Esme did the same.

Maybe this wouldn't be so bad.

Edward wrapped his arm around my waist and led me to the dining room. Everyone sat, and as I was about to do the same, Edward pulled me into his side.

"Bella and I have some news to share." Edward said.

Okay, so we were doing this now. Despite what Edward said earlier, I still didn't think Carlisle would be okay with this. I was hoping to have a drink or two before we got into a family fight.

"We're engaged." Edward said simply.

Alice squealed, Emmett clapped, and Esme came over and immediately wrapped me up in a hug.

"Oh, congratulations!" I wasn't sure who said it, but I appreciated it.

It was surreal to actually have other people know. I was engaged to Edward Cullen. I was getting _married_.

It was a mess of hugs and congratulations for a while. Alice and Esme were already planning, but it sounded much bigger than I wanted it to be. I would have to shut that down after dinner. Edward was pulled into conversation with Emmett and Jasper, and Carlisle approached me.

"Could I speak to you for a moment, Bella?" He asked. He didn't seem the same as he did the last time I saw him. He was calmer, kinder even.

I didn't know if I could trust his mood would last, but I agreed to his request.

We went to the kitchen and I stood on the other side of the island. I figured keeping that between us was a safe bet.

"I'd like to apologize to you. I said some inexcusable things the last time I saw you."

I huffed. "Yes, you did."

"Ah, you are perfect for him, aren't you?" Carlisle chuckled to himself. "I have a very stressful job, Bella. Sometimes I can take things too far, a trait I'm afraid Edward has inherited as well. But, I was out of line to try to interfere in your relationship.

"If you're the woman my son has chosen, then I respect that."

He seemed incredibly sincere. I was good at reading people, it was my job. I spent hours studying people acting, I could tell when someone was lying. And Carlisle was either being truthful, or was a phenomenal actor.

"Thank you." I said sincerely. I could forgive what he did in the past, but I sure as hell would never forget it. A man who can so easily whip a gun out and point it at his sons girlfriend isn't one you ever trust completely.

"You're a very strong woman. I had a gun pointed at your head and you didn't flinch."

I barked out a laugh. I wasn't expecting that. "Or stupid."

"You're not stupid. I've done my research, and I was surprised to see what a stellar businesswoman you are."

I just shrugged. Business smarts were necessary in this industry. I didn't just read lines off of a paper. I had to deal with people and big corporations, I had to make deals worth millions of dollars. Yes, I had professionals help me with a lot of those deals, but I also made sure to be part of every negotiation and meeting. I wanted to know what I was getting into.

Edward walked in then, and eyed his father warily. "Everything okay?" He asked me.

I smiled at him, letting him know I was okay. "Yes, everything's fine."

"Alice and Esme want to talk with you before dinner. I believe they're almost done planning the whole wedding."

I hoped so. The less I had to do with that the better. I gave Edward a kiss on his cheek and went to go find them. They were huddled around the table, all of the food around them forgotten, and scrolling through their phones.

"Bella! We could do an old Hollywood theme! You would look amazing in – "

"Hold on. Before we get too far into this I have some ground rules. One, I would love you to help me plan, or plan most of it if you're willing. I don't have a lot of time right now, but I don't want a long engagement. I'd like to be married by the end of the year." Alice's eyes nearly bugged out of her head when I mentioned she only had three months to play. It seemed like plenty of time to me. "Two, I want a small wedding, and Edward agreed. Just our closest family and friends."

Alice took a deep breath before she started to talk again. "Okay, I can do that. I'll plan everything, of course. A New Year's Eve wedding would be so romantic! You're going to Los Angeles tomorrow, right? Is there a specific designer you want to do your dress? Three months isn't a long time, but I'm sure you have some connections…"

"I can take care of the dress while I'm in LA. I'll send you pictures of the sketches so you can help me choose."

Maybe this wedding planning thing wasn't going to be too bad.

Dinner was spent talking about the wedding for the most part. Rosalie surprisingly offered up her opinion on a few things, and Edward seemed excited about the idea of a New Year's Eve wedding.

Carlisle and Esme took Alice and Rosalie home after dinner. Edward had some business to discuss with Emmett and Jasper. I didn't ask any questions.

I left the boys alone in Edward's office and I went to get packed up for tomorrow. I didn't need to pack too much, I still had a full wardrobe at my house in Los Angeles. I guess I should start bringing some stuff here.

Are we going to live in Chicago? Probably, Edward needed to be here. That was okay, though. I was starting to really like the area, and it was a nice change of pace from Los Angeles. It still had a good, big city feel, but it wasn't as hectic.

By the time I was all ready for tomorrow it was nearing midnight. I walked down to Edward's office to say goodnight to him. I knocked lightly on the door, and heard Edward tell me to come in.

"Everything okay?" He asked. I noticed him covering up some papers on his desk and I had to resist the urge to roll my eyes at him.

"I just wanted to say goodnight." I walked over to him, past Emmett and Jasper who were sitting across from Edward at his desk. He gave me a crooked smile when I leaned down to give him a quick kiss.

I caught the words _California International – Los Angeles_ on one of the papers on Edward's desk. It also looked like there were blueprints. Shit.

The words were out of my mouth before I could think them through. "Are you robbing my bank?"

Three pairs of eyes snapped to me.

"What do you have there?" Edward asked, his eyes narrow and his voice serious.

"I have a few safety deposit boxes." I shrugged. "It's supposed to be one of the most secure banks in the world. _Please_ don't get arrested robbing a bank."

"You have safety deposit boxes there? Shit, that makes it almost too easy!" Jasper shouted, an interesting gleam in his eyes. He enjoyed this too much.

"You went through the whole finger print and retinal scan process?" Emmett asked me.

"Yeah, it's how I get to the boxes."

"Shit. We have a way better chance at hacking the system and adding her name to the box than adding us into the system."

I leaned against Edward's desk and crossed my arms over my chest. "What are you trying to get?"

"Aro just moved something in there. I don't know what it is, but I want it. You're not doing anything, though." Edward's voice was harsh and final. He gave his brothers a look that said the conversation was over. No one ever disobeyed that look. Except me.

I looked to Jasper. "What would I have to do?"

He hesitated for a moment, but eventually gave in. "All you would have to do is go in and say you want to empty one of your boxes. It's box 1290C. I can get into the system and assign that box under your name. They already have your security information online. Just go in like you were checking any of your other boxes."

"You're not doing it, Bella. It's illegal. Go to bed, I'll be there in a few minutes."

I sighed and leaned down to kiss the top of Edward's head, through his mess of bronze hair. Then I looked at Jasper and nodded.

I could do that.

…rep…

My first week back in Los Angeles was jam packed. I filmed for about fourteen hours a day, and then I had other meetings to get through as well.

I met with Elie, one of my favorite fashion designers. She had only really started to gain popularity the past year or so, but I started wearing her at my first movie premiere. She was excited to help me, despite my time crunch. She said she would send me a few sketches within the week and I could choose from those.

I also had to meet with some executives with Netflix to discuss the project. They were already planning a media circus to revolve around the release, but I shot that down pretty quickly.

I was going to change the way I did things this time around. Everything was going to be on my terms. It was a tense three hours, arguing with five men twice my age, but eventually I won them over with Heidi and Claire's help.

I had only been able to talk to Edward a few times since I got here, and it was putting me in an awful mood. I missed my fiancé. _Fiancé, I loved that_.

It didn't help that, for the past three days, I had to make out with Noah Carter, the man I had casted as Edward in the film. We were on to the dreaded sex scenes and I hated them. They were awkward and uncomfortable, but necessary. The film was about Edward and I, so passion was a must.

Edward knew they were in there, but he told me he didn't want to hear about them.

I had a robe wrapped around me and was watching a playback of the scene we had just shot. It was one in the morning and we were all exhausted, but this was our last shot for the day. I still wasn't completely happy with it though.

"Just one more, I think." I told everyone, and we began to reset the scene.

"So, I finally get to see the talented Isabella Swan at work, huh?"

I whipped my head around so fast I got a bit of a head rush. There, behind me, was the real Edward. My Edward.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him. I didn't let him answer before I crashed into him and covered his lips with mine.

"I managed to get forty-eight free hours and they all belong to you." Edward told me with a smirk. _God, I missed him._

"Three minutes!" Someone from behind us shouted.

Shit. Sex scene. With Edward here. _Shit_.

"Um, so you're staying?" I asked, suddenly incredibly nervous.

Edward looked a little hurt, and it made me feel terrible. "Is that okay?"

"Of course. It's just – this probably isn't the kind of scene you want to see filmed."

Edward furrowed his brows for a moment and then his face lost all traces of emotion. _There it is_.

"I'll be fine. You get to work and I'll take you home when you're done." His words were comforting but I could feel the tension in his body. I didn't have time to talk about it, though.

I went back to my cue and cleared my mind. Noah walked over and we waited.

There was no dialogue for us to do, just visuals. I wanted some close ups of hands roaming and such. Pretty simple, unless your possessive fiancé was watching from a few feet away.

"Action!"

Noah approached and slid his hands around my waist, his lips covering mine. They were just pecks, we never did anything more when filming.

He pushed me back on the bed behind me and pulled my shirt over my head. My bra, thankfully, stayed on for this scene. I don't think Edward could have handled seeing more than some heavy petting.

Hands roamed for a few more moments before we were done. We only shot for about two minutes, but it seemed to drag on forever.

Kate hurried over and covered me in a fluffy robe.

"I didn't know you were shooting this tonight. I would have warned him before I got him in." She whispered to me. Of course, she got Edward on set.

"It's okay. Tomorrow is tame." He would enjoy that much more, I hoped.

I wandered over to Edward and took his hand. His eyes were intense, and his body rigid. I reached up on my toes to kiss his cheek.

"I just need to change and then we can go home."

The ride home was tense to say the least. I rode with Edward in his rental car, a large SUV, and I could practically feel electricity sparking around us.

We got home not much later, after the silent car ride. We walked in, hand in hand, and I looked up at him when we were in the safety of my home.

"Are you –"

"Bedroom." His voice was stern, so I did as he said. I knew it was wrong, but I was excited for the aftermath of his tension if he was taking it out in the bedroom. I made my way upstairs quickly.

I stood in the middle of my room, suddenly nervous. He wasn't actually upset, was he?

Edward approached me and took my left hand in his. He traced his thumb over my empty ring finger, and his eyes bore into mine.

I used my right hand to pull the chain out of my t-shirt. I had put my ring around my neck while I was here. There were too many prying eyes around, but I always wanted it close.

Edward dropped my hand and unclasped the necklace. He let the ring fall into his hand and gently sild it back on my finger.

He placed his hands on my hips then, and started to ease me back. When my legs hit the edge of the bed, Edward lifted me by my thighs quickly and threw me onto the mattress. I landed with a little yelp.

His body was immediately covering mine. His lips devoured my own, his tongue staking his claim as it invaded my mouth and melded with mine.

Edward sat up over me, his legs on either side of my hips pinning me down. He tore my shirt over my head and tossed it to the side, then quickly disposed of my bra. He was hovering over me again, his lips exploring all of the skin he just exposed.

I started tugging at the tie around his neck, but he quickly tore my hands from him and pinned them above me. _Shit, that was hot_.

His eyes were wild, and his hands were frantic. Edward kissed his way across my breasts, sucking on each nipple in turn. When one of my hands reached down to hold his head to me he bit down sharply. I screamed out in a mixture of pleasure and pain. He released my nipple with a pop and put my hand back above my head.

Edward sat up above me again and began loosening his tie. Once he had it free from his neck he pulled both of my hands to him, and wrapped his tie quickly around my wrists. His eyes met mine for a few seconds before it was completely tightened, and I gave him a small nod.

He would never do something like that if I didn't want it.

Edward threw my bound hands back above my head and I tested out my new bindings. It was tight, but not uncomfortable. The tie was soft and silky.

"You're mine, Bella." Edward whispered against my stomach. His lips roamed and licked, and his hands skimmed and squeezed. He licked along the tattoo covering my side, and spent ample time kissing the muted scar on my abdomen.

I squeezed my thighs together, trying to get any kind of minute relief. Edward noticed, though, and placed himself between my legs so my thighs couldn't meet.

"This is mine, too. Every orgasm is mine to coax out of you. Every sound you make is for me." He cupped my pussy through my shorts and I nearly exploded then and there.

Edward pulled my shorts and panties down together. "Jesus, I can _smell_ you." He trailed two fingers lightly along my slick folds, but never entered me. He leaned down and placed one long lick along the entire length of me, but nothing more.

My moan was a mix of a moan and a scream, because then he was gone from the bed.

Edward stood at the foot of the bed and stared at me, naked and tied up. He removed his clothing, but took his time doing so. He didn't seem to be in a hurry, but I was.

I wanted to try and free my hands, and I wanted to throw him on the bed to have my way with him. But, I was also eager to see how the rest of this would play out. Because this jealous, possessive Edward was here to play and I wanted to know what he had in store for me.

Once he was naked, Edward stroked his cock for a few moments while he stared at me and fuck if that wasn't one of the hottest things I had ever seen. He grabbed each of my legs and pulled me closer to him. He hooked my legs over his arms and spread me wide open for him. His cock slid easily inside, and Edward immediately set a punishing pace.

His hips slammed into mine so fast I could hardly breathe. The sounds of sex filled the room; slapping skin and erotic moans bounced off the walls.

"No one else, Bella. Never anyone else," he grunted out between thrusts. His eyes were focused intently on me; my eyes, my breasts as they rocked with each of his movements. He spent the longest time staring at where we were continually joined together.

"Never."

I was there. Seconds away from what I could tell was going to be one of the most intense orgasms of my life, and Edward pulled out just before I could reach it.

"No!" I shouted, but he didn't respond. I was flipped over, and Edward pulled my knees up beneath me.

He got on the bed behind me and gripped my hips in his hands. He set a slower pace this time, and all I could do was grip the sheets between my bound hands and beg for more. When I tried to push myself back into him, he tightened his grip on my hips to keep me still.

His pace started to pick up and my begs turned to loud moans again. One of his hands released my hip to gently massage the flesh of my ass, just seconds before it slapped down on the tender skin.

"Shit," I mumbled under my breath.

"That's it, baby," Edward muttered. My entire body felt like a live wire and I knew I couldn't hold it off any longer. "Come for me, Bella."

I was right. It was the most intense orgasm I had ever had.

We both stayed in our relative positions for a few minutes. I, quite literally, couldn't feel any of my limbs and had no choice. Eventually Edward got me situated at the head of the bed. He untied my hands with a smirk.

I sided up to Edward when he got into bed beside me and laid my head on his chest. "I'm glad you're here."

Edward trailed his fingers lightly along the skin of my arm and hummed. "Me, too."

"Should I start moving more of my stuff to Chicago? That's where we'll be most of the time, right?" I asked out of the blue. It had been on my mind since the night after we got engaged.

"Are you okay with that? I know you have a life here."

I just shrugged, as well as I could with Edward wrapped around me. "I like it there. I'll probably keep this place, because I'll have to be here for work a lot, but Chicago will be my new home base."

Edward was quiet for a few moments before speaking again. "I have a confession."

Uh oh. "What did you do?"

"Nothing bad. I just built us a house."

My eyebrows shot up and I pulled away from Edward slightly so I could get a better look at him. "Built us a house? Where?"

"A little ways outside of the city. I've had the plot of land for a while. It's in a gated community, but the houses are acres apart. We'll have our privacy."

Huh. I was expecting something along the lines of 'I accidently killed someone' not that he built us a house. "When did you start building a house?"

"Right when we got back from vacation."

Shit. That was four months ago. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Edward just shrugged. He brushed some of my hair out of my face with a smile. "I didn't want to scare you off."

That made me laugh. "If I didn't run when you told me you were some mafia prince I definitely wouldn't have run when you said you were building us a house."

"Yes, you are always stronger than I give you credit for."

I blushed at that, and Edward ran his fingers lightly over my pink cheeks. "Oh, I almost forgot!"

I jumped out of bed, nearly tripping because my limbs were still a little bit like jelly, and grabbed the three boxes that were sitting in my closet.

Edward sat up in bed and I set them between us. I pulled a blanket around my shoulders, something that Edward huffed at, and pulled one of the boxes in my lap.

"I wanted to wait until I was with you to open them."

"What are they?" Edward asked.

"Grammys."

…rep…

Having Edward on set was surprisingly fun. He would ask me questions between takes about what we were doing, and how I remembered everything. It was kind of adorable.

Part of me wished I didn't have to work so I could have spent more of the day with him, but I also knew he enjoyed his time on set with me. He had to leave the next afternoon and all I wanted was to spend the day locked inside with him.

The days started to drag after he went back to Chicago. Set life was suddenly boring without Edward there, and all I wanted was to get back home. Los Angeles wasn't my home anymore.

It was surprisingly freeing to realize that. I was excited to start this new chapter of my life.

I was finally heading back later tonight, but I had one stop to make before going to the airport. California International Bank.

Jasper called me last night and told me everything was set up. Box 1290C was officially under my name, and I had called and made an appointment to empty it this afternoon.

I walked into the bank and was met with marble floors and glass chandeliers. I had been here a few times before, but it was still as extravagant as ever. I kept some important documents and such in my boxes here, and Charlie always told me to check on them every once in a while.

That's not what I was doing today, though.

I was immediately ushered to a back room where a manager named Sue started the process of getting me checked in. They did the retina scan, and checked my fingerprint before asking me which of my boxes I wanted to empty.

Jesus, what if Jasper didn't do something right and I was about to ask for a box that wasn't mine? That hast to be a major red flag to these people.

I kept my face calm and polite despite my inner worries. "1290C, please."

"Of course, Ms. Swan. I'll be right back with that."

I exhaled loudly the second she was gone. The hardest part was over. I just had to get whatever was in the box out of here and I was fine. Everything was fine.

She brought me the box a few minutes later and stood back, giving me a bit of privacy.

I lifted the heavy metal lid and saw a single manila envelope. I looked inside, because that was what someone would do, right? Check to make sure everything was there.

There was a single picture inside of a woman placing a baby in a trash can.

…rep…

I knew Emmett and Jasper would be at Edward's when I got back. They both knew what I had done, and Edward was the only one in the dark.

He was going to be pissed. Beyond pissed, probably. But if I could get it done easier and save my fiancé the possibility of getting arrested doing something stupid, I was going to do it.

I spent the whole flight, on Edward's jet, of course, staring at the picture. It was black and white and grainy, but I knew what it was. That was me. The woman, or girl really, she was probably sixteen or seventeen. She was my biological mother.

I was furious.

For one, I didn't know why, or how, Aro had this picture. Edward told me after the hit went wrong Aro called it off. He got his point across, that he could get to me if he wanted, and was fine with that for now.

Second, the longer I stared at the girl in the picture, the angrier I got. Not at Volturi or the situation, but at her. I didn't have a single maternal instinct in my body, but I would never dump my child, or anyone's child, in a fucking trash can.

I stayed on the plane for a while once we landed. I had brought over some things from my Los Angeles place. I figured I could make little trips here and there and bring my stuff over. Edward told me he had people to do that, but there were some things I didn't trust other people bringing over.

My awards, for one thing. I had some clothes and trophies packed up, and I could see men loading them into a black SUV outside the window.

I started to get more nervous the closer I got to Edward. He was going to be furious, I knew it. I should have just called him this morning and told him what I was doing. It's not like he could have stopped me from Chicago.

I took a deep breath when the car stopped. I triple checked that the file was in my tote bag and got out. I knew better than to try and carry up any of my luggage, so I went straight to the elevator.

When I reached Edward's floor, I could hear him shouting at someone, probably Emmett and Jasper, from inside.

"Get the fuck out. Why are you both still here? Bella's going to be here soon and I don't want –"

They were coming down the stairs in a herd, and Edward stopped his ranting when he saw me in the living room.

"Hey," I said. I may have been nervous as hell, but seeing him after a week-long separation still made me smile.

Edward approached me quickly and captured my lips with his. I wanted to revel in the sensation of his lips and tongue melding with mine, but I couldn't. Not yet.

I pulled away and Edward frowned.

Reaching into my bag, I pulled out the manila envelope.

"What is this?" Edward asked. He opened the envelope and I knew he would realize what he was looking at.

"Where did you get this?" His voice was serious now, he was in work mode.

"Safety deposit box 1290C at California International."  
"Shit. _Shit, Bella_." He dropped the file on the table and ran his fingers through his hair. He started pacing the room, and I sat on a plush chair to wait for my scolding.

Jasper and Emmett walked over to look at the file, but they didn't understand what the picture was.

"Do you know how fucking stupid that was? It was illegal for one. If anyone found out you could be arrested."

"You do things that could get you arrested all of the time." I replied.

"What on earth makes you think that's an okay excuse? I'm not taking those kinds of risks with you."

"We wiped all traces of her there, Edward. Security camera's, online files, she's clean." Jasper said.

Edward turned on him, his eyes glowing with rage. "You put my fiancé in an inconceivable amount of danger. If you go behind my back again I will kill you."

There was no denying the threat of his words. You would think that a threat between brothers would be empty, but I knew Edward's wasn't. He always followed through.

"We did what we had to do, Edward. We needed to see what was in the box. You're ignoring the fact that everything went fine. Now we need to figure out what the fuck this picture means." Emmett held up the photo.

"Get out." Edward said, but I ignored him. They were going to find out eventually.

"It's me."

Both of their eyes went comically wide. "You have a kid?" Emmett asked.

"What? No. I'm the baby in the picture."

"Oh. _Oh_." They both said, nearly in unison.

"Charlie and Renee, the parents I grew up with, aren't really my parents. I just found out a few months ago."

" _Shit_. And Volturi knows. What's his motive, though?"

"Get the fuck out of my house!" Edward shouted angrily.

Emmett and Jasper didn't ignore him this time. They gave me shrugs as they passed by me. So much for them softening the blow.

Edward stood at the wall-length window in front of me. His back was to me, but I could still see how tense he was as he gripped the windowsill.

I wanted to go over and comfort him, because I knew he was hurt, but I also knew he was livid. I doubted he wanted my comfort at the moment.

"I'm sorry that I didn't tell you, but I'm not sorry I did what I did, Edward." His eyes snapped to me and he looked at me like I had lost my mind. I kept going though, I had to get all of this out before I lost my nerve. "He took everything from me, Edward. If you're taking him down, I want in."

"You're not _in_ anything, Bella. You're not pulling another stunt like that again, do you understand?"

"I won't go behind your back again, I promise."

Edward just sighed. He knew I was playing with my words and not agreeing to what he wanted. He let it slide though.

 **A/N: Another monster of a chapter. I hope you enjoyed it! Let me know what you think?**

 **I'm curious, what are some of your favorite fics at the moment? I need some recommendations!**


	6. Dress

_Inescapable, I'm not even gonna try. And if I get burned, at least we were electrified. I'm spilling wine in the bathtub, you kiss my face and we're both drunk. Everyone thinks that they know us but they know nothing about all of this silence and patience, pining and anticipation. My hands are shaking holding back from you. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **Dress**_

…rep…

The next few months went by in a blur. I met with Alice once a week to talk about wedding plans. I owed her something expensive because there was no way I would have been able to do what she had done. She made everything wedding related just fall into place.

We would be having the ceremony in Carlisle and Esme's back yard. They lived in the same gated community Edward and I were moving to, but they were about twenty minutes away from our new home. They had a lot of land and a beautiful patio for Alice to work with. It was a bit crazy, having an outdoor wedding on December 31st in Chicago, but Alice assured me she could pull it off.

Thankfully she kept to my small wedding demand. Only Edward's immediate family would be in attendance. There were a few aunts and uncles coming that I had never met, but that was it. I was relieved I wouldn't have to walk down an aisle in front of five hundred various mob members and their wives.

My list of invitees was pathetic compared to his. I had invited a few of my closest friends, Alison and her family and a few of my closest from the _Tainted_ movies. Edward convinced me to invite Charlie and Jane.

The whole paternity issue was something I was still struggling with, but I knew my grudge wasn't against Charlie or Jane. It was with Renee. If she didn't want me, why did she agree to it in the first place? She loves Jane, she loves being a mother to her. Was it just because I wasn't hers?

After spending many sleepless nights thinking about it, I realized I should have thanked Charlie instead of shutting him out. He saved me from a life in a system that I knew scarred kids for life. I was just hoping he forgave me when I was finally able to apologize to him in person. He and Jane quickly sent in their RSVP's. It was clear on their invitations that they were just for them. Renee was not invited.

Everything for the wedding came together nicely. Elie had sent me sketches, as promised, and Alice helped me pick. They were all gorgeous, but there was one that stood out to both of us.

Kate was my maid of honor and Emmett was Edward's best man. Kate flew up a month before the wedding to help with last minute things. I loved her for it.

I was officially finished with the film portion of _Hopeless Kingdom_ about a month before the wedding. We had a few setbacks, and filming ran over by a few weeks, but it was fine. We got what we needed and I was happy with it. Really fucking happy.

The last thing I wanted to do after a crazy six months of working was plan a wedding, but with Alice and Kate working together, all I had to do was watch and go with what they said.

Edward had gotten swamped at work again, and it wasn't unusual for the only time I saw him to be when his snores woke me up in the middle of the night.

We were now five days away from the new year and our wedding. I was imposing a new rule, and Edward wasn't too happy with it.

"I just don't get it, Bella." He complained as he got ready for work. I had woken up to kisses trailing down my stomach and, unfortunately, had to put a stop to them. Now, Edward was putting on a suit in his closet and grumbling about the five-day sex hiatus.

"It'll make our wedding night more fun," I told him

"I should've been told about this in advance. Last night would have gone a lot differently," he huffed and exited the closet, looking entirely too handsome in his impeccable dark grey suit. It made me regret my rule, but only for a minute. Okay, maybe longer than a minute.

"We've had sex before, Bella. Lots of sex. Great sex." Edward stared at me and I knew he had distracted himself. He could be such a man sometimes. "Why do we have to deprive ourselves?"

I walked over to him and smoothed down his suit jacket, wishing I was sliding it off of his shoulders instead. I leaned up to kiss him, and he immediately deepened the kiss, his tongue sliding over mine before I could even think. "You're cute when you whine."

I pulled his jacket and led him to the edge of the bed. I pushed him to sit down, and he had the face of the cat that ate the canary. He was always so smug when he thought he won.

I dropped to my knees in front of him and made quick work of the slacks he had just put on. With his cock free I looked up at him. "This is the last time I'm touching you until Saturday, so you better enjoy it." I warned him, stroking him a few times with my hand.

I took my time. I sucked and lapped at the head of his cock and enjoyed the loud moans that escaped his mouth above me, and reveled in the feeling of his fingers brushing through my hair every few minutes. I knew he wanted more, but I was waiting for those dirty words to bubble out of his mouth. Nothing brought my dirty talking Edward out to play like a good blowjob.

"Goddamn perfect fucking mouth…" He mumbled. " _More_ , Bella."

I continued to suck at just the tip, and looked up at him with a smirk. His eyes flared and I reveled in the unabashed need written all over his face. This man was going to be my husband. _Mine, forever._

"Jesus, suck my fucking cock, Bella." Edward shouted down at me. _There it is_.

I took as much of him as I could in my mouth, and relaxed my throat to take just a little bit more. Edward grabbed a fistful of my hair and held me still as his hips bucked into me. I moaned around him and it set him off again.

"Stupid fucking rule," he mumbled. His hips started moving faster and I tried to relax my throat even more. " _Fuck_ , baby," a few more thrusts and Edward was holding me in place as he came down my throat.

I cleaned him off and zipped his pants back up. When I stood, I kissed his cheek and said, "You're going to be late for work," before going off to take a shower.

…rep…

Alice was throwing me a bachelorette party because she found out Emmett and Jasper were taking Edward out for a bachelor party. I made them promise no stripers were involved, and had been assured they were just going to a casino for some fun and gambling. I reminded them of how I broke the law to help them out, just in case they were lying to me.

While I had no issues with Edward going out for a night of bachelor fun, I was not looking forward to my own party. Alice had a habit of going overboard with things, and I was worried she would take all of the extravagant ideas I shut down for the wedding and put that energy into this. I really didn't want to sit through a night where everything was penis shaped.

There would only be a few women here, so hopefully that led to a calm night. As far as I knew, it was only going to be Alice, Kate, Esme, and Rosalie. I was shocked when Alice said Rosalie wanted to come. She hadn't been quite so cold to me in the last few months, but we still hadn't said more than ten words to each other.

Edward left with Emmett and Jasper a few minutes earlier, and I knew in a few minutes the apartment would be flooded with noise. I enjoyed the quiet as I pulled on a pair of black leggings. I threw a white t-shirt on and covered it with one of Edward's worn grey button up shirts. It still smelled like him, and I missed him.

Stupid, stupid rule. Saturday could not come fast enough.

I was rolling up my sleeves when I heard the elevator ding and excited laughs come up the stairs. _Here we go_.

I met everyone downstairs and was assaulted with hugs from everyone other than Rosalie. They spent the next half hour decorating, even though I told them not to bother. Streamers were hug, balloons were blown up, and drinks were had. Lots of drinks. I stopped after two because I was never a big fan of letting my inhibitions down around anyone, but that wasn't the case for the women around me. I learned a lot of things I never wanted to know.

Then Alice decided it was time to play a game. She had made cards with various questions on them. Each person would take turns reading the card and we had to go around the room for everyone to answer. Alice called it a wedding party team building exercise, and I called it torture. I put on a smile for the game even though I was skeptical.

"Okay, first question!" Alice said, picking up a card. "How long did you know your current partner before you had sex? Bride to be goes first, of course!"

 _Don't roll your eyes at her, she planned your whole wedding. Don't roll your eyes at her, she planned your whole wedding._ "Um," I thought back to that fateful night in Chicago. Edward came out to Los Angeles… three weeks later? "Three weeks, I think."

Rosalie decided to pipe in then. "That's not true. Emmett told me he saw you leaving Edward's place the morning after your first show."

I just shrugged. "I didn't sleep with him." _This is why these games never go well_.

Rosalie huffed, and everyone went around the circle with their answers. Surprisingly, Edward and I had the longest period before sex.

When Kate answered, I assumed she would say the week that I knew it took her to hook up with her last boyfriend, instead she said three days.

"What? With who?" My voice was high and shrill, but I didn't care. I was too out of touch with Kate these days.

"Well, while you were frolicking across the world I met this sound technician, Garrett. He's amazing. At _everything_."

I couldn't help but laugh at Kate's innuendo. Maybe this game wasn't so bad, after all.

"Okay, next question," Esme said. Oh, God, Esme. She was here listening to her daughter and future daughter in law talk about sex. She seemed oddly comfortable with it, though. "When was the last time you had sex?"

"Is every question sex-related, Alice?" I asked her, and she just shrugged.

Of course, being the bride-to-be as Alice put it, I got to answer first. "Um, three days ago?" Everyone looked at me like I was crazy. Three days was a long dry spell for Edward and I. "I cut him off five days before the wedding. I told him it would make our wedding night more fun, but…" Could I trust them not to tell Edward? Probably. "I got this and I didn't want him to see it before the wedding."

I pulled the waist on my pants down slightly and showed the women the small tattoo now on my hip. It was simple, just Edward's name in elegant script. I knew he would love it, though.

"Oh, he'll love that. Edward is a possessive one, isn't he?" Esme, of all people, said. _Jesus, this was weird_.

"Don't the tattoo's hurt?" Alice asked. She grabbed one of my arms and started tracing the ink of them.

"The first one was the worst." I traced the words on my inner elbow. "It's mostly mental." I shrugged, and Rosalie scoffed.

I looked over at her indifferent expression and had it with her. "If you don't want to be here, you're free to leave."

"Excuse me?"

"You don't like me, I get it. If you don't want to be here, then just leave."

Rosalie sighed, and had the decency to look a little ashamed. "I don't dislike you, Bella. I envy you."

Well, I wasn't expecting that. "What?"

"You're gorgeous, for one. You have that old Hollywood, classic beauty that can't be bought. I know it's selfish, but it's just how I feel. And you're… real. You're talented and self-made and you're every man's dream."

I had to scoff at that. "I'm not every man's dream. I only look 'old Hollywood' when I have a team work on me for three hours, and I may be self-made but that also means I spend an ungodly amount of time working. That's not every man's dream."

"It was Emmett's. I heard him talking to Edward one day about how impressed he was by you. I know he loves me, but I just… overreacted maybe."

Even though it should go unsaid, I felt the need to say it to her. "I'm not a threat to you, Rosalie."

"I know. I'm sorry I've been so bitchy. I just get stuck on an idea sometimes. Then it's hard to think of a situation any differently, you know?"

"Yeah, I know." I did understand where she was coming from. She had no need to be jealous of me, but I understood the reasons. "So, we're good?" I asked her. I hoped we could get over all of the animosity, it was exhausting. I might not have agreed with the way she handled things, but I'm in no position to just her for overreacting. I'm prone to it, too.

"Yeah. If you can forgive me for the way I acted. I suppose it was a little childish."

Once the tension with Rosalie was out of the way, the night actually went pretty well. I learned more than I wanted to about the women sitting around me, but it was nice. It was a good bonding experience. We played more games and drank too much, but it was a much better night than I thought it would be.

Edward got home around two in the morning, effectively ending my party when he scooped me up and threw me over his shoulder. "Sorry, ladies. She's mine for the rest of the night."

I giggled as he carried me upstairs. He kept a hand firmly planted on my ass, and I knew I would have to be careful around him. He was obviously drunk, and a drunk Edward was a horny Edward.

He set me down and I got a good look at him. His eyes were a little glassy, and his smile was too relaxed. Yes, definitely drunk.

I walked over to the closet to choose something to change into for bed. I had to actually wear clothes to bed the last few days, which was a drag. But, I had to keep my hip covered, and I knew I needed to stay as clothed as possible if I had any hope of holding out against Edward. "How was your night?" I asked from the closet.

"It was good. I won about a million dollars."

The shirt I had in my hands fell to the ground. I walked back out and saw Edward lying in the middle of the bed, his clothes still on. The picture of casual as he threw out he won a million dollars. "You won a million dollars? Doing what?"

Edward shrugged. "Playing poker. I'm very good." He smirked at me. I knew just how good he was.

I leaned against the door-jam of the closet. "And what are you going to do with your winnings?"

"Hmm." Edward looked over at me and his eyes raked over my body. It was the definition of an 'eye-fuck' and it made me hate myself for the stupid rule. "I will buy you anything in the world you could possibly want, if you come over here and sit on my cock."

I shrugged my shoulders and smiled at him. "You'll already buy me anything I want."

Edward let out an exaggerated sigh and rolled over on his stomach. "That's true."

I couldn't help but laugh at him. I got changed into some flannel pajama pants and a t-shirt and hopped into bed. He was taking up most of my side, but I managed to squeeze in. It took me about ten minutes, but I managed to get his clothes off with a lot of maneuvering, and a lot of dirty requests spewing out of his mouth.

"Love you," Edward mumbled once he was situated behind me with an arm wrapped around my waist and his head resting against my neck.

…rep…

Tomorrow night at this time I would be married to Edward Cullen. In twenty-four hours I would be Isabella Cullen.

My thoughts all day had been full of thinking about what I would be doing tomorrow at this time. I woke up thinking about how I would be eating breakfast with Kate and Alice and the girls I would be getting ready with. Then, in the afternoon I thought about how I would be getting into my dress and having the finishing touches put on my makeup. Then, at five I envisioned myself walking down the aisle toward Edward, and what his face would look like. Now, it was eight and I imagined us dancing under twinkle lights, husband and wife. _I have become a romantic sap, apparently_.

I got home from my final dress fitting and found a note on the counter. It was directions through the hotel in Edward's handwriting. I followed them, and somehow ended up on the roof. It was stunning; there was a great patio with a fire pit and lounge chairs surrounding it, and a cozy canopy covered in twinkle lights. Soft music played from somewhere in the background.

Edward was there, of course. He stood near the edge of the roof, his arms resting on the ledge looking out over the city.

"What is this?" I asked him.

He turned and smiled at me. "This is our last date before you become my wife." He picked up a single red rose that I didn't notice sitting on the ledge and walked over to give it to me.

I held it up to my nose and reveled in the comforting, floral scent. "We don't go on many dates," I said, mostly talking to myself.

"No, I suppose we don't. But, I thought the night called for a special occasion." Edward wrapped his arms around me and slowly started to sway us in time with the music. His hands rested comfortably at my waist and I let mine drape over his shoulders. I smiled up at him and it hit me. _This man was going to be my husband_.

I looked up at him and took in his messy hair and sparkling green eyes. I memorized the way his jaw jutted out against his neck, and the exact curve of his nose. "I really… really love you, Edward Cullen. You take care of me when I don't even know I need to be taken care of. You believe in me when I don't believe in myself, and you're there for me during the good times and the bad. And I just… I really love you."

…rep…

I was oddly calm. The day had gone smoothly so far. I woke up in the room designated as Edward's at his parent's house. He had never actually lived here, but they had rooms for their children in case they needed them. After our date Edward drove me here and we were forced to say our goodbyes. Until tonight. When we got married.

Kate spent the night, too. I was pretty sure she was waiting for me to break down or run away. I knew I wouldn't though. I also knew, if I wanted to, Kate would be there to drive the getaway car.

Esme had a wonderful brunch set out when I got downstairs. There was enough food to feed the entire wedding later, but I knew this was just for the five of us getting ready here.

After brunch we ended up in Carlisle and Esme's impressive master bathroom. It was the size of the average living room, so all of us fit with plenty of room to spare. I thought the morning would drag on, but there was more to do than I realized. Hair. Makeup. Nails. Jewelry. Dress.

The ceremony wasn't set to start until five, and I was ready and patiently waiting to put on my dress by half past three. My hair was half up in an impressive braided contraption. I was on strict orders not to touch it. My nails were a modest, neutral pink, and my makeup was simple but perfect.

At four I heard a car pull up, and snuck over to the window to peak out. I saw Edward's black Aston Martin pull up and held my breath as the door opened. Edward exited the car, the picture of ease. He had a small smirk on his face, I think. It was hard to tell from this distance. His black tuxedo was perfectly pressed, but he straightened it as he got out of the car.

I couldn't help myself. I tapped my finger against the window quickly, and his head snapped up to me. He was definitely smiling now, I could tell. I gave him a little wave, and got one in return. Then a bony hand pulled me away from the window.

"He's not supposed to see you yet!" Alice squeaked at me.

I sighed. "I'm not in my dress yet, Alice."

She walked over to the door that held the bag containing my dress. "Well, you're about to be." She unzipped the bag and pulled out some of the fabric at the bottom. It made my heart skip a beat.

I've worn a lot of fancy dresses. I've gone to the most prestigious award shows and movie premieres in dresses that cost more than my home. But nothing compared to this dress. It wasn't completely white. Most of it was a taupe, skin colored shimmery fabric. But, it had white embroidered details covering it. They reminded me of tree branches or bolts of lightning, all jagged edges and harsh lines.

It sounded weird when Elie described it to me, but the final result was beautiful. The deep sweetheart neckline stopped about an inch beneath my breasts, and the thin straps had strips of fabric, with the same embroidery on them, flowing down my shoulders. The dress began to flow out at my waistline, and an extra layer of tulle overlapped the detailed skirt.

Kate helped me into the dress, and I let out a deep breath the second it was zipped up. _This was it._

My whole life, I never felt like I belonged anywhere. I knew, now, why I always felt like an outsider in my own home in Forks. I didn't, technically, belong there. I'm thankful for what Charlie did for me, but I was never meant to be there. I started to feel like I belonged to the Hollywood elite for a while. I was good at what I did, and I fit in with them. I understood how the world worked there, and I would have lived that life for as long as I could.

I don't belong there anymore, though. I belong with Edward. He was what I had been missing for so long. A companion that I could trust completely, that would do anything for me just as I would do anything for him.

I'll still work, I loved acting and making music. But my job isn't my whole life anymore. I don't need to live my life to the standards of Hollywood. I'm going to live my life how I want, and if that means I never get another role then I'll continue to make my own on my own terms.

Maybe they'll flop. Maybe people will lose their interest in me because I'm married. But I don't care. I'd rather have a lifetime with Edward than another chance at an Academy Award.

I stood there and stared at myself in the full-length mirror. My ring glistened in the faint sunlight as I gripped the skirt, just to feel the material. _Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry_.

Kate touched my shoulder, and I turned to her. "Your, uh, Charlie is here."

Charlie and Jane got in last night. I didn't have time to see them then, but I knew Charlie had agreed to walk me down the aisle when Kate talked to him about it. I was too scared to ask him myself.

Charlie entered the en suite, looking handsome as ever in a suit and tie. He even shaved his mustache. We stood there for a few moments, just staring at each other.

"I'm sorry." I whispered.

Charlie shook his head. "You may not be my blood, Bella, but you're my daughter."

I shuffled over to him, and wrapped my arms around him. He wasn't my biological father, but he was my dad. He ate Oreo's with peanut butter with me and taught me how to drive a car.

Charlie pulled back and looked at my dress. "You look beautiful, kid." His voice caught on the last word and I knew I wouldn't be able to hold it together if Charlie started to cry.

Thankfully, Kate came back in then. "It's time."

Kate handed me my bouquet and led Charlie and I downstairs. Music started playing and Kate walked out the back door first. I knew the aisle was right there, which meant Edward was just a few feet away. Charlie wrapped my arm with his and we were walking.

I should have taken in all of the decorations that Alice had been talking about for months, or looked at the faces of the people around me. I didn't know half of them, but I probably should have at least acknowledged them. All I could do was look at the man waiting across the aisle for me.

I had never seen him smile so big. He stood there, his hands clasped together in front of him, and his face nearly split in half with his smile. I was pretty sure I was wearing a matching one.

When Charlie and I got to the front, he took his seat next to Jane, I think. I handed Kate my flowers and Edward gave my hands a gentle squeeze. The next twenty minutes were a blur. We went with traditional vows, so thankfully I didn't have anything to memorize. I knew I had said what I needed to, but all I wanted was for this to be over. I wanted to be his wife and I really wanted him to kiss me. I think Edward could tell how impatient I was, because he laughed a little bit while he was saying his vows.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."

The priest didn't finish his sentence before Edward had his hands cupping my face and his lips pressed to mine. It was a chaste kiss, unfortunately, but it was a kiss I would never forget. Edward parted our lips and rested his forehead against mine. "I love you, Mrs. Cullen."

I had been so good all day. Hardly a tear was shed on my part, but those words broke me. Tears started to fall silently down my cheeks and I hid my face in Edward's neck. I couldn't hide long though, because Edward pulled me back down the aisle.

We were supposed to wait inside for about half an hour as the reception was set up for us. Edward led me upstairs, to the room I slept in last night, and closed the door. His arms wrapped around my waist and he picked me up and swung me around the room. My dress flowed around us, and our laughter filled the air.

When he set me down on my feet, his eyes roamed over my dress, and his hands trailed along my waist. He grabbed one of my hands and helped me do a little twirl, and whistled at what he saw. "You are absolutely stunning."

"You have to say that, because you're my husband." I smiled up at him because damn, it felt good to say it.

"Damn right I am," and with that, his lips were on mine. This was a much different kiss than our first as husband and wife. This one was all about tongues invading and teeth nibbling at lips.

"None of that now, kiddos. Time to party!" Emmett barged into the room, and I swore I could hear a growl come from Edward. He behaved though, and wrapped an arm around my waist to take me downstairs.

Edward's family was surprisingly normal. There were a few relatives I had never met that were invited, but they all welcomed me with hugs and congratulations. It wasn't what I expected from a family full of criminals. Who was I to talk, though? I robbed a bank a few months ago, technically.

I got to talk with Charlie and Jane more, and it was good to have the air clear. They didn't make me feel bad for my reaction to the news, and they weren't upset I needed time to come to terms with everything.

We did all of typical wedding activities. We cut the cake and fed each other bites. Edward enjoyed sticking his head under my dress a little too much to get my garter.

Edward only relinquished his hold on me when I danced with Charlie. He was nearby the whole time, dancing with Esme, and kept his eyes on me. I was pretty sure he hadn't looked at anyone other than me since I walked down the aisle.

I didn't remember any of the conversations I had with the people around me. I knew Alison and Austin were here, and I think I talked with them a bit. I hoped I did.

It felt like we had been here forever, but when I grabbed Edward's hand to look at his watch, it had only been a few hours. I sighed and sat back in my chair. I wanted to leave. It was rude, I knew that, but I didn't care.

"How much longer do we have to stay?" I whispered to Edward. We had a few moments to ourselves. Most people were dancing, even Charlie and Jane seemed to be having fun on the dance floor, but I needed to sit for at least a few minutes.

They must have been the words Edward was waiting to hear, because not a second later he had me out of my seat and was pulling me toward the door. I looked around to see if anyone noticed our quick escape, but everyone was enjoying themselves, so I didn't feel too bad.

Edward helped me into the car, which was quite a task with the dress around me. As he drove, he played with the fabric of my dress, tracing the embroidered design.

He had gotten us a suite at a hotel downtown. I didn't know anything about it, or where it was, just that I wasn't allowed to leave it for the rest of the weekend. I wasn't complaining, though.

Edward had already checked into the suite earlier today and dropped off some stuff for us, so we didn't have to waste time at the front desk. I refrained from attacking him in the elevator, because I knew once I started kissing him I wouldn't stop for the rest of the night. Once the doors opened on our floor, Edward swept me up in his arms, and made his way down the hall.

I took the key from his hands and opened the door for him, and he carried me into the extravagant room. The floors were marble, the furniture pristine, and the view phenomenal. There was even a golden piano in the corner, which seemed a little tacky to me, but I didn't care.

I dropped the key on the floor and wrapped my arms around Edward's neck. "Bedroom." I whispered, still resisting the need to kiss him.

I didn't bother to look at any more of the room as we passed through it. I kissed Edward's cheeks and nose and neck and any bit of skin I could reach.

The bedroom was dark when we entered, only the light of the city illuminating it from the window. We stood there for a few moments, both of us still in our fancy clothes, a little rumpled from the evening so far. Edward pulled me to him, but just wrapped his arms around my waist and looked down at me.

"I love you, Isabella Cullen."

The sound of my new name on his lips made me uncontrollably happy. "I love you, Edward Cullen."

His hands slid up my sides and began to play with the thin straps of my dress. His fingers, light as feathers, gently pushed the straps down my shoulders. I lifted my arms out of the dress and Edward gently pulled the material down my body, letting the dress pool at my feet.

I was left in a pair of nude colored lacy boy shorts and nothing else. The new tattoo on my hip was still covered, and a tiny surge of excitement shot through me at the thought of him finally seeing it.

Edward dropped to his knees in front of me. The sight of this strong, powerful man at my feet, with his hands gently tracing along my legs, made me weak. I held on to his shoulders so I wouldn't fall, because his lips began kissing up each leg and I didn't think I could handle it.

Once he made the circuit up and down each leg once, he gripped the edges of my panties on either side of my hips and slowly slid them down my legs. His lips began kissing along my belly button from hip to hip, and I felt him freeze when he saw the dark script on my skin. Fingers traced the letters softly before he looked up at me.

"Is that real?" He asked me.

"Yes. It's the main reason we needed a sex embargo the last five days."

Edward's eyes returned to his name imprinted on my skin and his tongue traced and licked along the letters. I heard a few mumbles from below me, but no coherent sentences.

He stood then and helped me step out of the pool of clothing that surrounded me. Gentle hands pushed me back toward the bed and situated me in the middle of it, resting my head of the fluffy pillows at the top. Edward's eyes didn't leave mine as he removed his jacket and dropped it on the floor. They didn't wander as he unbuttoned his shirt and slid it down his arms or as he unzipped his pants.

His bare skin met mine as he covered my body with his. Lips kissed their way up my stomach, across my breasts, and along my neck until we were finally face to face. No words were needed, or possible really when our lips were so busy.

Nothing was hurried. Our kisses were slow and deep with Edward's tongue taking over mine. Edward's hands trailed along my waist and wrapped my legs around his hips while mine held him impossibly close, not caring about the indentations I knew my nails were making in his back. No foreplay was needed, but that didn't stop him.

One of Edward's hands slid down my body and started to play with the wetness between my legs. He made me come on his fingers in a matter of minutes, and swallowed my screams with a powerful kiss. He drew my next orgasm out for what seemed like hours. He situated himself between my legs and feasted upon me like a starving man. His movements would intensify, just enough to get me to the edge, and then he would slow back down to gentle, loving kisses to my thighs. My toes curled and my legs tensed; my fingers pulled at his hair and my head was constantly thrown back in pleasure.

When he finally let me come I couldn't control myself. Pillows were thrown from the bed and I was pretty sure there were holes in the sheets from my fingers digging into them. My brain was mush and my thoughts were a constant string of Edward's name and a few choice curses.

Edward kissed his way back up my body slowly, stopping to show my breasts attention yet again, but I pulled him away and attached my lips to his. I took control this time, savoring his taste surrounding me all over. With our bodies finally lined up just right, he sank into me and everything was right. His thrusts were slow, but powerful and passionate. His arms surrounded me, searching for the support he needed to drive into me as deep as he wanted. The bed creaked and the nightstand cleared as Edward searched for more traction to pound into me at just the right angle.

No coherent words escaped either of us. We were a mess of moans and groans and the occasional name. My legs tightened around him and my hands squeezed the arms hovering over me. My hips met his as quickly as they could. Edward nuzzled my neck and sucked lightly on my earlobe. "Come for me, my wife."

That was just the beginning. Edward let me rest for a little bit after our first time together as husband and wife, but I woke up a short while later to kisses along my freshly-tattooed hip. He pulled me on top of him then, and traced his fingers along the tattoo as I rode him. We both needed a shower then, and Edward held me against the cold tile and fucked me until we were both spent.

We weren't interrupted for the rest of the weekend. Or we were, and we just ignored it. I didn't care. Edward made love to me in every possible spot of that suite. He took me across the top of the gold piano in the main room, and he bent me over one of the chairs in the bedroom, fucking me while I looked down on the people below us. I sat on the small bench in the marble shower and put him through the same torture he put me through the first night, sucking his cock for as long as I could before letting him come.

We had exhausted ourselves by early Monday morning. It was still dark out and both of us collapsed in bed. I didn't think I had ever felt so worn out, but I knew I fell asleep with a smile on my lips and my husband's arms around me.

 **A/N: I hope you enjoyed the wedding chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. Bella's wedding dress is by Gali Karten if anyone is interested in searching for it - 2018 collection. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this one!**


	7. Gorgeous

_You're so gorgeous, I can't say anything to your face, 'cause look at your face. And I'm so furious at you for making me feel this way, but what can I say? You're gorgeous. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **Gorgeous**_

…rep…

Everyone always talks about how hard marriage is. It can be, I was sure of that, but when you put a little effort into it, it wasn't that complicated. It can get complicated, however, when you wake up to a news report about how your husband is thought to be involved in a double homicide. That's when things can get hard.

I had been able to push aside that part of Edward's life for a long time. As far as I was aware, the last time he killed someone was the man who shot me. Maybe it was stupid of me to overlook such a serious aspect of Edward's life, and maybe I was going to Hell for loving a man who had committed so many crimes, but I didn't care anymore. He was my husband and I was going to be by his side no matter what.

I was still pretty pissed about the double homicide, though.

Edward was showering before he had to head out to work, and I was frozen watching the news in bed. I twirled my wedding rings around my finger and listened to the newscast.

"Two bodies were found mutilated in the residence. Police have reason to believe the killings are mafia related, and strongly believe the two Cullen brothers, Edward and Emmett, are probable suspects."

"They can't just throw his name out there like that. Shouldn't that be a private police matter? What bullshit. 'Probable suspects' is another way to say they don't have anyone and want people to believe it's them." I told myself. I turned off the TV and got out of bed, but jumped a little when Edward was standing in the doorway to the bathroom.

"How long have you been standing there?" I asked him, hoping he didn't hear my little rant to myself.

He shrugged. "Long enough."

I took a deep breath and asked the question I wasn't sure I wanted the answer to. "Did you…" I pointed to the television, like it would finish my question for me.

"Yes."

"Oh." I replayed the news segment in my mind, and my eyes widened and my heart pounded. "They know! They said –"

"Bella, it's fine." Edward wrapped his arms around me and hugged me to his chest. His heart was beating evenly, and I used that to calm my own. "They blame Emmett and I for every dead body they find. They were right this time, but they don't actually know it."

That was… better I guessed. I don't know, maybe not. He still did it, but his work wasn't my business. I had to remember that.

"We have dinner with your family tonight," I reminded him. I hoped changing the subject would get my mind off of the news. "Do I bring something? That's what you do, right?"

I was hopelessly unprepared for what being a wife entailed. I knew there was a _proper_ way to act around people, especially the people in Edward's life. Women were supposed to act a certain way for their husbands, but I had no clue what that meant. I also thought that most people would offer to bring food to a big family dinner. That was a thing, right?

"Alice and Rose usually bring something, I think. I never really paid attention." Edward looked at me, an odd expression on his face, for a moment before he continued. "You're not like them, Bella. You work, a lot, and I don't expect you to cook me dinner every night or throw a charity event in your spare time."

I ignored him. "Cookies. I think I can make cookies. They have a recipe on bags of chocolate chips, right?" The alarm on my phone went off then. "Shit! The album photoshoot is today. I can buy cookies."

I grabbed my phone and silenced it. Edward tugged my face up to look at him. "Don't worry about the cookies. Just show up and my mother will be happy. I'll pick you up from here at seven?"

"Okay, I'll be here."

…rep…

"Fucking extensions… who wants clumps of fake hair on their head… shit!" I stumbled in and tripped over one of the many boxes cluttering the apartment. Edward and I were finally moving into the home he built us this weekend, but that also meant a lot of our stuff here was packed up and in our way. He had people come in every day and take it over to the house, but there somehow always ended up being boxes everywhere still.

I was late and exhausted and I didn't have any fucking cookies. The photoshoot was a success, we got the shots I wanted for the album, but it took eight hours when it should've taken six. I was pulling my hair out, literally, as I got home and rushed upstairs to change.

"I'm late, I know. I just need five minutes!" I shouted as I ran past Edward's office. I ran to the closet and pulled on the first things my hands touched, which ended up being a pair of dark jeans and a grey sweater than hung off of one shoulder. I went to the bathroom to see what could be done about my hair. It was a teased mess, but I was pretty sure I had gotten all of the extensions out. I pulled it up into a bun on top of my head. It would have to do. My makeup was a lost cause. It looked fantastic, but it was definitely too much for a family dinner. I didn't have time to do anything about it, though.

I quickly grabbed a pair of boots and ran out the door. "Okay, let's go!" I shouted as I hopped down the hall, putting on one boot at a time. Edward managed to catch me before I fell over in the process.

"Slow down, it's fine."

We were forty-five minutes late, but nobody seemed to mind when we showed up. Esme ushered us in and seated us for dinner. I pushed my food around on my plate and listened to everyone's conversation throughout dinner. Alice and Rosalie were planning a charity event for a local children's hospital, and the men talked about some sporting event. I couldn't suppress the yawn bubbling inside of me, and I tried to hide it, but Esme caught me.

"Are you okay, dear?"

"I'm fine. It was just a long day."

"Well, let's let the men clean up and we'll go in the living room and chat for a bit before you two head home."

Edward kissed my cheek as he passed me and whispered in my ear, "Ten minutes, and then we'll leave."

I joined the women in the living room and listened to more discussion about the charity event. "Bella, you're coming, right?" Alice asked me, pulling me out of my exhausted mind.

"Oh, um, when is it? I'll have to check my schedule." Alice gave me the date and I was pretty sure there was no way I could go. I was about to put out _Hopeless Kingdom_ and Heidi was pushing me to do the awards season circuit. I hadn't made any decisions yet, but I knew I would be busy. I kept that to myself for now, though.

"We should make a shopping date, too, Bella." Alice told me.

"Why, what do you need?"

"Oh, not me, silly! We should update your wardrobe to be more… Cullen wife friendly."

I frowned at that. This sweater fifteen hundred dollars. I knew the Cullen's liked their luxury, and I dressed up when I needed to be. I spent a lot of time wearing what other people told me to. Sometimes I just wanted a comfortable sweater and jeans, I didn't see what was so terrible about that. "My wardrobe is fine, Alice."

"I'll pick up some things for you and have them sent to the house. When are you guys moving in again?"

"Tomorrow, actually."

"Oh, good. You'll have time to get settled before Em and Rose's wedding next weekend!"

With that the conversation was finally off of me, and on to Rosalie. I had heard a lot about Rose's wedding, of course. It was going to be quite the event. Over five hundred people had confirmed they were going, and the church it was being held in was huge. I was looking forward to it more now that Rose and I were at least on speaking terms.

Thankfully, Edward emerged from the kitchen just in time to save me from plans about where we should brunch on Thursday's now that their regular place was closed. _I don't have time to fucking brunch_.

"Oh, Bella, I made some copies of some of Edward's favorite recipes for you." Esme handed me a file folder, thick with papers.

"Thank you, Esme," I told her, as sincerely as I could.

This wife thing was more work than I realized.

…rep…

"Add remaining ingredients, and cook until tender. Adjust the seasoning to taste." I scoffed at the instructions. "What kind of instruction is that? To taste?"

The kitchen was a mess; the beautiful kitchen in the wonderful house Edward built for us. Last night was our first night here, and my first time actually getting to see the house in person. It was extravagant, everything about Edward was extravagant, but it felt like home already, and I didn't know how he did that.

He had a movie room put in the basement, just for me, and there was a piano in a sitting room off of the foyer. He told me this was my room. He had beautiful floating shelves covering one of the walls, and had arranged all of my awards there himself. He even hung a few plaques I had gotten for album sales along with them. There was a couch, one of the most comfortable couches I've ever sat on, in the corner covered in blankets and pillows. A television hung on the wall opposite of the awards. A desk was in the corner, my laptop already sitting on it.

Our bedroom took up nearly the entire top floor of the home. It was wonderful. The walls were a deep blue and the bed more comfortable than anything I had ever slept on. There was a sitting area and our closet seemed like it was a mile long. The en suite was just as impressive as Carlisle and Esme's had been. The entire house was the definition of luxury.

But, I couldn't get my conversation with Alice and the other women out of my mind. I didn't feel bad about not having time to host a charity function, or having the desire to even do it. I had started the Isabella Swan Foundation a few years ago, and made hefty donations to charities across the world often.

The more I thought about it, the more I realized how unprepared I had been to become Edward's wife. The Cullen's were some of Chicago's most elite, of course they were expected to dress a certain way and attend certain events. I was Edward's wife now, so I would be expected to do the same. I should be poised and polished and have dinner on the table every night at seven o'clock sharp.

I didn't see that happening today, though, because my stew smelled God-awful. And smoky. That wasn't right, was it?

"Bella?" Edward shouted from the foyer.

"Kitchen!"

I had been so focused on the stew in front of me, I didn't notice the smoke steadily filling the room. "Shit!" I pulled the oven open and more smoke invaded the house. I blindly reached in with an oven mitt and grabbed the sheet full of burnt bread out of the oven.

I threw the tray on the island in front of me and screamed in frustration. Edward came in and opened some windows to let out the smoke. With my luck, the fire alarm would go off any second.

"Are you okay?"

"No. I can't cook to save my life, I don't dress 'appropriately' to be your wife, apparently, and I don't have time to go to _fucking_ brunch every Thursday!" I shouted, throwing my arms up. It made Edward laugh. "Why are you laughing?" I grumbled at him.

He came over and cupped my face in his hands. "Because you're adorable." I got a quick kiss before he continued. "You don't need to cook dinner. Throw the recipes my mom gave you away, I don't care. We can hire a cook." I tried to protest but he didn't let me. "Let me finish. I love the way you dress. Alice and Rose are stuffy and proper, but I love those shirts where your shoulder peaks through, or the jeans where I can grab your knee and feel your skin and not just denim. I'd much rather you skip the fucking brunch on Thursdays and have more time to spend fucking me on Thursdays."

He was trying to be funny, but I wasn't really in the mood for it. "This isn't a joke, Edward."

He sighed. "I know, but I meant what I said. My parents tried to set me up with girls just like Alice and Rose, women who would have made a perfectly proper wife. I could have had all of those things a long time ago if I wanted." A surge of irrational jealously took over my body at the thought of Edward with anyone else. "But I didn't want them. I want you. And I'm completely serious about Thursdays."

Edward finally got the laugh he wanted out of me. I wrapped my arms around his waist and buried my head in his chest. "Thank you."

"I actually had something I wanted to talk to you about. Emmett and Jasper are in my office. Do you have some time?"

Huh. That was odd. But, because every element of my dinner is either burned or otherwise inedible, I was free for the rest of the night. "Sure."

Edward held my hand as we walked to his office, his thumb rubbing soothing circles into my skin. Emmett and Jasper were there when we walked in, sitting in chairs right across from Edward's desk. There was a new, third chair there now. I took what I assumed to be my seat and Edward sat across from us.

"You guys don't need me to rob a bank again, do you?" I joked with a laugh. None of them laughed though, and my eyes went a little wide. "Do you?" I asked more seriously.

"No, no banks this time. I do have something to ask of you, though. If you're not comfortable with it, you can say no. Don't feel like you have to do it, okay?" Edward said. His eyes bore into mine, almost as if he was begging me to say I didn't want to do it.

I nodded. "Okay."

"Have you ever heard of an actress named Elena Rossi?"

I thought about the name for a few moments, but it didn't sound familiar at all. "Should I have?"

"No. She's a relative nobody as far as we can tell. Aro is helping her for some reason. He's been contacting agencies in California to represent her, and is trying to get her into award shows and parties. It's an odd move for him, but we want to make it as hard as possible for him to do it."

"That makes sense. Thwarting any and all of his plans will piss him off, at least."

Edward took a deep breath. "How much pull do you have in Hollywood, Bella?"

Ah. That's where I came in. "A lot." It was true. I had made connections with the best of the best in that town. "What do you want me to do?"

"Can you have her blacklisted? Make it so nobody wants to work with her?"

"Yes." I shrugged. "I've done it once before." I got varying looks of amusement, confusion, and pride from the men around me. "One of the guys from the _Clash_ movies… the ones I backed out of… he went around telling people I was difficult to work with and rude to everyone. He pissed me off, so I made it so he never got anything more than a role as an extra. It's not my finest moment."

I felt a little bad about it now. Caleb was an asshole for sure, but I might have overreacted a bit.

"You can say no to this, Bella." Edward reminded me.

"I know. I can do it, it's not that big of a deal."

"There is one more thing." I waited for him to continue. "Can you get us into the events?"

" _You_ want to do awards season?" This was definitely not the conversation I expected to be having with Edward tonight. I had made up my mind to skip all of these things, but he wanted to go? Then it hit me. "You're goading him."

"Yes. I want him to know I can take anything away from him and have it for myself."

I didn't like seeing this side of Edward. I knew it was in there all of the time, but the criminally genius part of him always made me nervous. No one was invincible.

"Or do you want to show him you only go to the best of the best?" I had three pairs of confused eyes looking at me, so I elaborated. "I won at all of the big shows last year, the globes, SAGs, Grammys, and Oscars. If you win the year before, you're usually invited back and asked to present an award. But, what if we skip everything except the Oscars?

"The Oscars are the best of the best. If this woman is a serious actress, that's her end goal. But, we skip everything except the Oscars. We'll announce our marriage that day, maybe right before we arrive. We'll take over the biggest night in Hollywood."

The room was silent, and I started to think I was over stepping my bounds. Who was I to tell them what to do in this situation? "We can do whatever you want, I was just –"

Edward held up a hand and cut me off. "That's brilliant."

"Are you sure you want to do this? We'll be putting a lot of attention on ourselves. The press is going to butcher us." I knew it was coming, of course. The second word got out I was married to Edward Cullen, everyone was going to search for anything they could on him. People would speculate about his underground dealings even more, and I knew a lot of people would look at me differently once they knew.

I had envisioned a very low-key wedding announcement, and release of the film to field any questions about us. I wasn't going to do a lot of press, but if that was what Edward wanted, I would do it.

"He's up to something. He's been too quiet lately, and then this? We're going to beat him at his own game."

Later that night Edward kept staring at me. It wasn't his impatient get-over-here-I-want-to-feel-you-up stare, it was a worried stare. I wasn't sure what it was about, but it was putting me on edge.

I finished brushing my teeth and got in bed. Edward was sitting up on his side reading, so I curled up next to him. He was tense, though. "Are you okay?"

He sighed, so I knew he heard my question. He didn't answer, though. "Edward?"

"I don't want you to think… I didn't know Aro was going to take this Hollywood route. I don't want you to feel used."

"I don't feel used. I didn't think that at all, Edward. If I can help you out, I'll do whatever I can. You wouldn't do that, I know it."

"I would." I tensed immediately. "Before. Before I met you, I wouldn't have hesitated to seduce you if I thought I could use you to my advantage."

Every once in a while, Edward would let things slip about what he was like before. The before Edward is not someone I would have wanted to know. He was irrational, irritable, and a jackass. To be fair, he can still be kind of a jackass, but never to me.

…rep…

As had become our tradition, it was nearly midnight but Edward was still working in his office at home, and I was situated on his couch on my own computer. I loved my little office he made for me downstairs, but it was also nice to spend some extra time together even if we were just working in the same area.

"Do you know of any good concert venues in town? Smaller ones, that hold a few thousand?" I asked him.

I was planning a little release party and concert. _Hopeless Kingdom_ was coming out the Friday after the Academy Awards, and I had a lot of planning to do in the next two months. I was going to invite fans to a private event here in Chicago, but I needed a place first.

"Jasper owns a few, actually. One of them technically doubles as a strip club, so I wouldn't recommend that one." Edward stretched out in his chair before he went on. "His other is a good place, though. What are you planning?" He got up and came over to join me on the couch.

I had a fan's twitter page pulled up. I was making a list of people I found online to invite to the event. I liked to scroll through their pages for a while first, just to make sure there were no red flag posts. Kate also usually looked them over too.

Edward pulled my laptop out of my hands and started scrolling through it himself.

"'I need Badlands 2.0 in my life now bellaswan,'" Edward read from the page. He kept going, reading some of his favorite out loud. "'Not to be dramatic, but I need Bella to make her comeback already.' Doesn't comeback imply that you've been gone for longer than you have?"

I shrugged. "Not really. Last time anyone really saw me was the Oscars last year. I haven't gone that long without releasing anything since I started."

"Well, we better make this a damn good party, then. Jasper can show you around his place next week." He shut my computer and pulled me up from the couch. It was late and we had to be up early for Rose and Emmett's wedding tomorrow. Edward was Emmett's best man, but I wasn't in Rose's wedding party. Not that I expected to be. I would still be getting ready with all of them in the morning, like we did for our wedding.

"Is it petty of me to have bought a three-thousand-dollar dress because Rosalie and Alice told me my clothing was unacceptable?" I asked him as we made our way to bed.

Edward laughed a bit at that, but then turned serious. "No. They had no right to talk to you like that."

The next morning was… bearable at least. Rosalie and I got along a lot better than we used to, but we weren't best friends by any means. We got ready at Carlisle and Esme's home again, but Emmett and Rosalie were having their ceremony in a big church downtown, and then the reception at one of Edward's nicer hotels. It was a big event, and I was more thankful than ever that my wedding didn't have to be such a big ordeal.

I was ready first, and excused myself as Rosalie and her parents and future relatives got her ready. I knew she wouldn't care if I was there or not. I wandered downstairs, remembering my own wedding just over a week ago.

Jasper startled me out of my memories. "You're already here. I've been instructed to be your date for the ceremony, until your husband can take over. Are you ready to go?"

 _You always take such good care of me. Thank you for the date._

I sent Edward a quick text as I rode over to the church with Jasper. For some reason, I seemed to get along better with Emmett and Jasper than Rosalie and Alice. They were amazing women, but they didn't have the same priorities I did. I don't care about brunch or cooking. I worked hard and had more important things to focus on. They just didn't understand that.

"Edward told me you have a couple concert venues downtown?" I asked Jasper as we arrived. We were some of the first, and took our seats near the front of the church.

"Yeah, you interested in stripping? I could make a shit load of money if you're –"

"You know that's not the one I was asking about."

He laughed it off. "I know. Yeah, I've got a concert venue downtown. Holds about twenty-five hundred."

"Can I take a look around next week?"

"Of course."

People started filing in then. There were just… people everywhere. I could never have handled this as my wedding.

"You fit in well, Bella." Jasper told me out of the blue.

"Not so much with the women of the family." I mumbled.

"I love my wife, but she cares more about the clothes on her back than the actual charities she throws those events for. You don't, though. You work hard and you care about what you put your time into. You're perfect for Edward."

After hearing the women tell me all of the things I should be doing for Edward, and completely failing at them, it was just what I needed to hear. "Thank you, Jasper."

The wedding was beautiful, I think. I didn't pay much attention. Edward stared at me from his spot next to Emmett the whole time and distracted me. As soon as Emmett and Rosalie made their way back out of the church, husband and wife, Edward relieved Jasper of his date-duties.

"Thanks, Jasper!" I called after him as Alice dragged him off. Edward pulled me into his arm. Pressing every inch of himself against me.

His hands skimmed along the beads of my dress. "You look beautiful."

My dress was covered in colored beads and pearls that faded from a beautiful cream to a muted blue at the hem near my knees. The deep v neck dress cinched at my waist and the stiff skirt flowed out. "Thank you."

Edward took me to his car, parked out back behind the church. We were right on time when we got to the reception, but Edward pulled me away from the ballroom and into an employee-only lounge. "What are you doing?"

He pulled me deeper into the room and lifted me up on the back of a couch. His lips captured mine in a kiss that let his intentions be known. "Edward, we're –" His lips hit that spot on my neck that he knew caused my brain to go to mush. It was a dirty trick. He let his lips continue down my chest, obviously enjoying the deep v neck of the dress. I knew I had to put a stop to it once he pushed his hand into the top of my dress to grab my breast. "Edward, we can't do this here."

"We'll be quick. I promise." His words were muffled against my chest, but it didn't make them any easier to fight. He knew he had me when I let him push his hand under my dress and cup my pussy. "You're just as dirty as me, baby, just as impatient."

I quickly pushed his slacks out of the way and freed his cock. I pumped him a few times with my hand, but he didn't need it. He was hard and knew what he wanted.

Edward pulled me closer to the edge of the back of the couch, and pushed my dress aside. There was no slow build up or anything like that, Edward got right to a punishing pace of his thrusts, but I didn't mind.

My arms wrapped around his neck and pulled at the hair at the base of it. I let out a loud moan and Edward quickly covered my lips with his to silence me. His hands gripped my ass under my dress to keep me in place, and his thrusts began to get erratic.

He reached between us and rubbed my clit in time with his thrusts and I was gone. I buried my head in his neck to muffle my moans, and bit him, probably a bit to roughly, when I couldn't take it anymore.

With both of us sated, Edward straightened himself up, before finding some tissues to clean myself up. It always astounded me how he could go from frantically fucking me and whispering dirty things in my ear to being so sweet the next, gently cleaning up my thighs.

He threw away the tissues and lifted me off of the couch. I stumbled a bit, my legs a little sore, but Edward held me up. His arm was thrown over my shoulder and we were walking toward the door when it flew open.

A man in a suit with a hotel logo embroidered on it and a name tag halted when he saw Edward and I. _Shit_.

"M-Mr. Cullen. I didn't expect to see you back here. Is there anything I can do for you?" He stuttered.

"No, thank you, Patrick. I was just showing my wife around before we headed to the reception." Edward nodded at him and ushered us past him out the door.

The second we were out of earshot of poor Patrick I couldn't contain the laughter that had been bubbling inside of me. We stood in the middle of the lobby just laughing for a few minutes. We took our time getting to the reception after that, which was in full swing by the time we got there. "Jesus, there are a lot of people here." I mumbled to Edward as we entered.

"Rosalie does love attention."

Edward pulled my chair out for me and then sat next to me. We were at the family table, of course, and most everyone else was already seated. This was much more formal than our reception. A five-course meal was served, and everyone talked amongst themselves. Edward kept smirking at me, though, which made the evening more fun.

I was taking a sip of water when Emmett spoke up. "Is nobody going to talk about how those two snuck off and totally screwed somewhere?" My water got stuck in my throat and Edward patted my back softly while glaring at Emmett.

"Oh, leave them alone Emmett. The sooner I have grandbabies, the better."

I couldn't keep the wince off of my face, no matter how good of an actress I was. I knew I would have to tell them soon, it was in the movie, but I also dreaded it. I knew the looks I would start to get from everyone once they knew.

"What is it, dear? You'll be a fabulous mom."

"Stop, mother." Edward's voice was harsh. Everyone gave him puzzled looks, but I couldn't do more than stare at my full plate of food.

Edward grabbed my hand from under the table and gave it a few quick squeezes. He looked at his mother and said, "Bella can't have children."

The whole table went silent. I could feel Carlisle getting upset from across the table, and Esme looked shocked and sad. I knew I had to say something. "I, um, I was pregnant. A year ago, when I was, uh, shot. I… I lost it, and there were complications."

"We should have known about this, Edward." Carlisle said, his voice equally as harsh and intimidating as his son's.

"It's not your business, Carlisle."

Edward stood up and pulled me with him. He started leading us toward the exit, but Rosalie of all people caught up with us. She didn't say anything at first. She just looked at me, and then wrapped her arms around me. "I'm so sorry," she whispered in my ear, and then went back to her table.

 **A/N: I hope you're all still liking where this is going. I didn't get much feedback on the last chapter, but I hope you still enjoyed it.**

 **Also, Hopeless Kingdom was nominated as one of the Top Ten Completed Fics over at twifanfictionrecs (.com) – which is pretty exciting! Feel free to head over there and vote if you'd like :)**


	8. This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things

_This is why we can't have nice things, darling. Because you break them, I had to take them away. This is why we can't have nice things, honey. Did you think I wouldn't hear all the things you said about me? Here's a toast to my real friends, they don't care about the he-said-she-said. And here's to my baby, he ain't reading what they call me lately. ~ Taylor Swift, **This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things**_

…rep…

"You're sure about this?" I asked Edward one more time. I had been talking with Heidi and Claire for the last three hours, planning everything we needed for the media circus that would be my life once Edward and I showed up at the Oscars together. Heidi was, of course, thrilled that I decided to do so much promotion. It wasn't just for me, though I couldn't tell her that.

Edward nodded. We had talked at length about this the past couple weeks. I knew there were two reasons why he was okay with so much media attention for this. One, the Aro situation. I had done my part and had that woman blacklisted, but he still wanted to show Aro he could have what he wanted. Two, he told me he was proud to be my husband and wanted to support my job.

I had told him about how I was thinking of slowing down on the media and promotion aspect this time, because I knew how people would react to us being together, but he didn't want me missing out on those things because of him. It wasn't that I enjoyed the media attention, it was all about being seen and having people watch your projects. That was it for me, especially now that I had my priorities sorted out.

Edward first. Work second. That was it. For now, the two seemed to mesh. If Edward wanted to bring out the big guns to intimidate Aro, then I could do that.

I might be over exaggerating. This wasn't that much press, but it was more than I wanted to put Edward through. I could handle people calling me names, I learned to deal with that a long time ago. I just didn't think I could handle people talking badly about my husband.

We had just about a month until the award show and we needed to finalize everything.

"Yes."

I took a deep breath and started to read off of the notes I took from my phone call with Heidi. "Okay. The Oscar's are February 25th. I'm presenting Best Picture, and the first ad for _Hopeless Kingdom_ will premiere at the end of the ceremony, then we'll have the Vanity Fair party. I've got a Rolling Stone interview in a few days, that cover piece will come out the beginning of March. Then an appearance on Fallon on Wednesday. The album and movie are out at midnight that Thursday, and I have the release party Friday night.

"Compared to what I've done in the past, it's really not a lot of press. But it is just enough to get people intrigued. They love a good mystery."

Edward looked over the schedule in front of him. "Are _you_ sure about this? You'll get questions about my… business." he asked me.

I shrugged and gave him a sly smile. "I lie for a living, Edward. I think I can handle it."

…rep…

My day was long, and my entire body was exhausted. All I wanted when I got home from the shoot for the Rolling Stone cover was to take a bath and fall into bed. Well, what I really wanted was for Edward to be there next to me but he got called to some _meeting_ in New York. I had no clue if it was a legitimate business meeting, but I didn't really want to know.

All of my relaxation plans were thwarted when Esme, Alice, and Rosalie greeted me in my own living room. "What are you guys doing here?" I asked after a round of hugs.

"We thought you might need a little girl time. You spend too much time with the boys. I brought some clothes for you, too!" Alice squealed.

I tried my best to stay calm and not let my temper get the best of me. "I told you I didn't need clothes, Alice."

"We'll just leave them here for you, darling. You can do what you'd like with them." Esme interjected. "We also wanted to talk about what happened at the wedding." Esme said quietly.

I knew this was coming. I had been avoiding all of them the past few weeks. I was busy, so I thankfully had good excuses. "I've had a really long day, I just –"

"We should talk about it, dear. It's a big deal, you being Edward's wife and not being able to have a child."

That's what this was. They didn't want to see if I was okay, it didn't matter how I was dealing with the fact that I could never have a child of my own. These women could be so infuriating sometimes. "It is a big deal, but it is an issue I discuss with my husband, not you."

I stared at Esme, daring her to push the subject again. I was in no mood for games. She got the hint, and dropped it. "Look, I've had a busy day and I'm exhausted. I think you all should leave." I didn't let them reply before I walked to the front door and held it open for them.

It took all of my restraint not to slam it shut behind them. Who did they think they were, coming over here uninvited? Bringing me clothes so I would be presentable enough to be Edward's wife was a low blow and they knew it. Talking about how I couldn't have Edward's child was just another way for them to make me feel inferior to them.

That was it. They were jealous. They got sucked into being preppy housewives and doting on their husbands twenty-four-seven, and they don't like that I'm not fitting into that mold, so they're trying to squeeze me into it.

I went over to the bar Edward kept just off of the kitchen. I knew he had it stocked with some of the best stuff money could buy. After a particularly rough day at work he would make a beeline for the bar and pour himself a bottle of… whatever was in this crystal container. If it was good enough for Edward, it was good enough for me.

I felt much better by the time the bottle was empty. I grabbed my phone and called Edward as I stumbled up the stairs.

"Bella?" Edward's velvet voice greeted me over the phone.

"Edward!" I sighed. His voice made me happy. "I miss you. Come home."

"Are you drunk?" He didn't sound as happy as I did. That was a shame.

"Yes. Your mother and Alice and Rose were here when I got home today. They brought me," a hiccup escaped me before I could continue. "Fancy clothes because the ones I have aren't acceptable. And then! And then they tried to talk to me about how I can't have a baby. It's not my fault, you know, but they keep acting like it is." I had reached our bedroom at this point, and was finally able to throw myself on the bed. "I'm in bed but you're not here. You should be here."

A smooth chuckle filled my ear, and it made me smile. "I'll be there tomorrow. Are you going to bed now?"

" _No_ , I'm talking to you! I can't wait until we don't have to hide anymore. I can wear my ring all of the time and you can wear yours. I love my ring. It's very shiny."

"Go to sleep, Bella. Drink some water and take an aspirin first, okay?"

"No, I don't want to sleep. I want _you_." I whined.

Edward's voice got deeper and a little more hushed. "And what is it that you want from me?"

"A lot of things. A hug, first, because you give the best ones. Then a kiss, because you're pretty good at that too. Especially when you kiss my pussy. Very good."

" _Jesus_ , Bella."

I sighed and buried my head in the bed. "I'm tired and I miss you."

"You're a very distracted drunk, did you know?"

"What?"

"Drink some water. Take an aspirin. Go to sleep. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

" _Fine_."

My head was pounding. It was like an entire school band was playing their drums on my brain. Very unpleasant. I rolled over and saw it was one in the afternoon and groaned. There was a glass of water and two pills next to my bed. Did I put them there before I fell asleep? I must have, so I took the pills and downed the glass of water quickly.

I pulled on a sweatshirt, because, apparently, I only had enough energy to remove all of my clothing last night and not put anything else on. I didn't remember anything after I found Edward's stash behind the bar.

My head was starting to feel a little more normal so I decided to search for some food. I started to make my way down the hall, past Edward in his office, toward the –

I backed up a few steps and stopped in front of Edward's open office door. There he was, sitting at his desk, smirking at me. "When did you get here?"

"I came back early. I had a very interesting phone call last night."

Shit. That was me. _I think_.

"Oh, yeah?"

Edward beckoned me over to him and when I got close he lifted me up on his desk and situated himself between my legs. His hands gently trailed along my thighs. He smirked up at me. "You don't remember, do you?"

"Um, a little bit. I'm a distracted drunk, you know."

"Oh, yes, I know. Do you remember what you said to me about my kisses?"

…rep…

An hour ago, Claire released a statement confirming our marriage. Now, Edward and I were in the back of an SUV on our way to the Oscars. Quite a difference a year can make.

I had scrolled through all of my social media since then and things were just… insane. Most people thought it was a joke, so while we were in the car waiting, I grabbed Edwards hand and put it on my thigh, and placed my left hand above his. I snapped a quick picture and posted it on all of my platforms with the caption 'On our way!' and that was it. Nothing had been posted there in nearly a year, so I knew that would get people going.

I smiled up at him. "Well, we're officially public, Mr. Cullen. You're stuck with me, now."

Edward grabbed my left hand and gently kissed my knuckles and my ring. "What are we going to do with our new freedom to go wherever we want?"

"Well, maybe it's time you took me on a proper date."

"Noted, Mrs. Cullen."

The car stopped and there was a tap at the door. Edward grinned and helped me out.

It took us an hour to get to our seats in the theater. Unlike last year, I stopped for an interview or two on the red carpet. I could tell everyone was flustered. Those red-carpet correspondents spent months preparing and figuring out what to ask everyone they were interviewing. I threw them a major curveball. Thankfully, they didn't have time to find out much about Edward before they talked to me, so I got pretty basic questions about him. All easily dodged.

The ceremony was much more relaxing for me this year. I wasn't nominated so I could just sit back and enjoy myself, as much as one could at an event like this. I whispered with Edward a lot, just little quips about people around us and my experiences. He got a good laugh at them.

I knew every camera would be trained on us the whole time, and I had told Edward that beforehand. He knew to keep a polite smile on his face at all times, as unnatural as that was for him.

I left him with a kiss ten minutes before the end of the show. I was presenting Best Picture, and then the preview for _Hopeless Kingdom_ would premiere just a few minutes after that.

I managed to present the final award without tripping or stuttering over my words, so I considered it a success. Then, once I was back in my seat next to Edward and the cast had said their thanks, the lights dimmed and The Prologue I wrote a year ago played over the loud theater speakers.

…rep…

I had been in a perpetual good mood since Sunday night, in large part to the fact that I hadn't used my phone or the internet since then. I didn't want to know what was being said about Edward and I, I knew it would only piss me off.

It was Tuesday morning and I was flying out to New York later tonight for Fallon tomorrow. That would be when my blissful, ignorant bubble would pop. Heidi and Claire would be there to tell me about everyone's reactions so far, but for now I didn't want to know.

I was in a good mood and I was going to take advantage of it. I had a tray of coffee in my hand and took a short walk from the Starbucks down the street over to Edward's office. Ben and Eric where both close behind me, but it felt nice to be out.

The receptionist gave me no issues this time and I walked right into Edward's office. His head snapped up, and his mouth popped open, probably to scold whoever dared to enter his office without knocking first.

"What are you doing here?" he asked me, a smile replacing his scowl.

I sat in the chair across from him, and pushed a cup of coffee toward him. "I came to visit my husband. I can do that kind of thing now, and not worry about who might see me."

Edward took a sip of his coffee and came to lean against the front of his desk, next to me. "You're in a good mood."

I sighed. "For now."

Edward pulled me to my feet and immediately captured my lips with his. He dominated the kiss, his lips overpowering me and willing me into submission. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he gripped my waist, pulling me into his rapidly growing erection. I didn't need any other encouragement to reach my hand down and squeeze him through his slacks.

Before I could do much more, an annoying buzz sounded from his desk. "Mr. Cullen, Anthony Watson is here for your meeting."

"Shit." Edward mumbled against my lips. I pulled away and started to pick up my purse, but Edward stopped me. "Don't go."

"But your meeting – "

"It's just a formality, it'll be twenty minutes at the most." Edward pulled me behind his desk and pulled out his chair.

I looked at him with a raised eyebrow. I wasn't following any of this. I only got it when his eyes drifted to the cutout for his legs at his desk, and then back to me. My eyes got wide and my mouth hung open. "You want me to…"

Edward gave me his sexy half smirk that he knew I couldn't resist. I laughed a bit to myself, and threw my bag under his desk. "I'm going to be pissed if I get caught." I warned him.

Edward kept that sexy smirk on his face, and told his secretary to send Mr. Watson in. He sat down before the man entered his office, hiding the very visible bulge in his slacks. As quietly as I could I undid his belt and pants, and eagerly pulled his cock out.

This was wrong on so many levels, I knew that. It was inappropriate and stupid but I couldn't help the excitement and adrenaline that started running through my veins as I grasped his hard cock in my hand and pumped a few times.

"Edward, good to see you, my boy!" a man's voice sounded in the room and I froze.

"Anthony, good to see you." Edward said. One of his hands covered mine and pumped a few times, before leaving to rest on his desk. I continued the movements he started, and sucked the tip of him into my mouth.

And thus began one of the most erotic twenty minutes of my life. I shouldn't have been turned on in this situation, I knew it. But I could hear little disturbances in Edward's voice when he would talk to the unsuspecting man across from him. He would stumble over his words if I took him too deep into my mouth suddenly, or cough if I sucked too hard. It was wrong, but I loved it.

I had no clue what the men talked about, but I didn't care. I caught their goodbyes, and heard the door close. Edward waited a moment before he pulled my head away from him and stood me up on my feet. He made quick work of my jeans, and immediately felt between my legs as soon as they were gone.

"I knew you'd like it, baby." He mumbled against my lips. He kissed me hard for another second before breaking away and turning me around. I was bent at my waist, and my hands gripped the edge of the desk. "You have to be quiet."

I nodded and Edward quickly thrust into me. My fingers gripped the desk until my knuckles were white. His thrusts weren't fast, but they were hard and sharp. "God, you're perfect," his hands gripped my hips harshly, but I could feel Edward's fingers gently trace the tattoo on my hip. He let one of his hands trail up my back, underneath the blouse I still wore. His hand on my back, softly trailing along my skin, was a stark contrast to the deep thrust of his hips.

There were three quick taps on his door before it started to open, just a crack. "Mr. Cullen, we need you – "

I tried to get up, it was just my reflexive reaction, but the hand on my back kept me in place. "Not now!" Edward growled, and the door snapped shut at his harsh tone.

"Shit, shit, _shit_." Edward covered my body with his, and turned my head to face him. He pressed his lips to mine, to shut me up I think, and thrust three more times before I locked my muscles around him. I swallowed a few of his groans, so maybe the kiss was to keep both of us quiet.

"Oh, my God," I whispered to myself, my entire body sagging against his desk. Edward pulled my limp body up and sat me on the edge of his desk. "I can't –" I couldn't go another round. Not now.

"I know, baby. I just need to clean up and then we can leave." He got a tissue and cleaned up my thighs, and picked up a few things that I guess had fallen off of his desk. I didn't remember hearing anything fall, but that didn't mean much.

When I started to feel my legs again, I pulled my jeans up and grabbed my purse. "You're a bad influence on me, Edward Cullen."

…rep…

"Mother _fucking_ assholes! Did you see this one?" I thrust the computer at Kate. The article in question described me as, and I quote, _Edward Cullen's New Whore_.

Kate, Claire, and Heidi knew about the rumors surrounding Edward, it was their job to know. They probably knew before I did, so they were already prepared for all of this. I was prepared, too. I knew how brutal the press could be, but Jesus they were butchering us.

In one article I was his whore, and in another I secretly had his baby during my year-long hiatus. Usually there was a small seed of truth in the articles these trashy magazines wrote, but they were just trying to get as many stories out as possible now. These things were ridiculous.

Sure, it might be a bit hypocritical of me to be offended at being called his whore when I let him have his way with me in his office twenty-four hours ago, but whatever.

I was only in New York for the afternoon to do Fallon, and then I was back on a plane to Chicago, thankfully. So, I sat in my dressing room for two hours and googled myself and Edward.

With an hour to go, Kate forced me to close the laptop. I pulled on the asymmetrical leather skirt with a diagonal zipper up to my waist, and tucked my black silk blouse into it. It had a deep v neck down my chest, which was filled with a delicate diamond chain. Edward gave it to me before I left yesterday.

 _Edward_. I knew he had been reading about people's reception to us since Sunday, but kept me in the dark because I asked him to. We'd have a lot to talk about when I got back.

When I was finally in the chair opposite of Jimmy I put all of the articles out of my mind. "We've got a lot to talk about, huh?" he asked me.

I sat back and crossed my legs, I wrapped my hands around my knee, making sure my ring was right on display. "Just a little bit, I think."

"Okay, so first, the marriage. You're married, congratulations!"

"Yes, thank you! We got married on New Year's Eve, so it's been about two months."

"And how long had you known Edward before then?"

"I met him June the year before, so we were together about a year and a half before we got married."

"And nobody knew! I can't believe you were able to keep it a secret that long."

I laughed at that. "We did have a little slip up early on. It was actually right after the last time I was here! We had a 'wild night out' in New York."

"Ah, I remember! People were saying you trashed a hotel room at the Four Seasons?"

"Well, first of all, I wouldn't have called the room trashed by any means. It was just a little… messy."

"And we actually have a picture of you two here, at the Vanity Fair Oscars party last year." Jimmy held up a picture of Edward and I, and I couldn't help but smile.

"Yeah, that was an impulsive decision on my part. It was just an unreal night and I wanted him with me." I shrugged.

"Now, there are a lot of rumors going around about this, too. He's rumored to be into some… shady stuff."

I sighed and leaned my arm on the armrest. "I think we all know better than to believe anything written on the internet. I just saw an article earlier today that said I had twins just a few months ago, but I can definitely confirm that did _not_ happen." I laughed, but also kind of felt like crying because it didn't happen. "I've got Hopeless Kingdom coming out tomorrow night, so I think that will answer a lot of people's questions."

…rep…

 _Hopeless Kingdom, the second visual album from three-time Grammy winner Isabella Swan, now Cullen, takes us on a journey unlike any other. Cullen gives us a view inside her life, the fame and fortune she is surrounded with, as well as the deeper side of her. The side that craved friendship and companionship, and the lonely girl who was struggling with her newfound fame._

 _Cullen cast Noah Carter, a relative unknown actor prior to this weekend, as her now-husband in the film. Both give award worthy performances. Cullen, as usual, brings a level of rawness to her roles that few are able to achieve as naturally as she._

 _It is easy to see, from the album alone, how complex their love story started out. While the story ends just when you want to know more, it gives Cullen a great opportunity to expand their story and a wide opening for another album._

 _The biggest reveal in the film is the complications Cullen suffered when she was unexpectedly shot at the premiere of the final Tainted movie last year. Little information had been revealed about the incident, and we now know why. Cullen suffered a miscarriage during her life-saving surgery, and other complications that left her unable to conceive another child in the future._

 _She has yet to talk about this publicly, letting the film and album do all of the talking for her. The film ended on her reconciling with her now-husband Edward after the shooting, following a falling out due to both of their busy schedules. We can only be thankful for him, because it seems he might have saved his wife from a possible suicide attempt, though Cullen's team has denied it was that serious of a situation._

 _Hopeless Kingdom, the album, has been out less than twenty-four hours but at the time of publication had sold 150,000 digital copies. Physical copies are available in stores today._

Edward read what seemed like the hundredth review to me as we lounged in bed Friday morning. There was nothing like the sense of relief that followed releasing a project as big as this one. I was done. It was out. I was free.

The reviews were mostly positive. No one would ever expect everyone to agree on something, so I knew there would be people who hated it, but I didn't care.

"Shit, this is amazing, Bella." Edward said, scrolling through his computer looking for more articles. I pulled his laptop away from him and set it on the bedside table. I took its spot, situating myself over his lap.

"Thank you." Edward cocked his head to the side, confusion on his beautiful face. "For letting me do this. I know it kind of worked out good for both of us, with this whole Aro situation, but you could've said no to it a long time ago."

"You're good at what you do, Bella. Really fucking good. I couldn't not let you do what you love. Everything worked out better than expected anyway," he smiled at me and gave me the sweetest of kisses.

We got to Jasper's venue early that afternoon. People wouldn't start arriving for a few hours, but I had to do a final sound check and make sure everything looked okay. I had the lobby transformed with LED lights with song titles and lyrics everywhere, and some outfits and props from the film. There were bags of merch lining the room for everyone to take as they left later, and an area for food later.

Edward sat with me as I got ready, or as Chrissy got me ready, and continued to read more reviews as they popped up. "Five stars from Rolling Stone, Bella. _Five_."

I couldn't help but giggle at his enthusiasm. It was adorable.

His family showed up a while later. Things were still tense between me and most of them, except for Emmett and Jasper. They were kind, but very formal around me now. I didn't have it in me to care too much about it.

I was ready for the first part of the evening, and in-depth Q&A with everyone out there. The lights dimmed and I walked out to the single stool in the center of the stage.

"Well, hey, guys," I said with a smile. The questions started flowing, and it amazed me how much better they were than anything any reporter asked me. They were in-depth questions about lyrics and scenes. They were questions that mattered.

"What were some of the hardest scenes for you to shoot, emotionally?" A girl, maybe fifteen, asked me.

"Definitely anything from the shooting, on. Actually putting on a replica of the dress I wore that night was… emotionally draining to say the least. But, I'm really glad with how everything turned out, so it was worth it."

"Is your husband here?" someone asked, and the whole room erupted in a unanimous 'aw!' when I said yes.

"What made you not continue the album up until now? So much more has happened that could have been on it, right?"

"It was actually a very conscious decision to stop it there. I felt like that was a really important time in my life. I went through a lot of things, things that I thought were important for people to know, and I didn't want to rush any of that. I felt like I needed to make this so I could move on from what happened. Okay, I think we have time for one more question." Kate was giving me a signal to wrap it up from backstage.

"What is the best part about being married?"

That one made me smile. "I think the constant companionship. You're partners for life. There's nothing like knowing you'll have someone by your side for the rest of your life."

 **A/N: A few people have asked why we haven't heard much more about the picture and the whole Aro situation. More will be revealed in the next chapter, but Edward is handling most of that, and he tries to keep Bella as far away from that part of his life as possible. Like I said, more to be revealed in the next chapter!**

 **Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this one. Next update will likely take a day or two to get up. It's an intense chapter.**


	9. Dancing With Our Hands Tied

_I loved you in spite of deep fears that the world would divide us. So, baby, can we dance through an avalanche? Say that we got it, I'm a mess but I'm the mess that you wanted. Oh, 'cause its gravity, keeping you with me. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **Dancing With Our Hands Tied**_

…rep…

I had been called some pretty nasty things since I started acting. Being a public figure gave everyone the idea that they could lose all niceties and call you whatever they wanted, just because they didn't like you. People I have never met have called me a horrible person with no provocation, and I've learned to deal with it. I understood that I could never please everyone, and there would be people who didn't like me.

But, it was never like this. I had never felt so _hated_. Genuinely hated by everybody.

I think it started with one article by a local Chicago newspaper. They, obviously, knew the most about the Cullen's reputation and didn't have to do as much digging as other news outlets. They were quick to point out all of Edward's past relationships, and how frequent they were. I was quickly labeled his newest whore, someone to keep his bed warm and his body satisfied; I was a ditzy actress who was seduced by his power and money.

I knew it wasn't true. I loved him, and he loved me. I knew that. But once you read something enough, your resolve starts to crack no matter how strong it was in the first place.

I _was_ seduced by his power. I loved the way he could command a room. People respected him, and it showed. I also loved the way he commanded our room. Did that make me his whore? I let Edward bend me over his desk in the middle of the afternoon while his office was full of people, so maybe I was.

A lot had changed about me in the last year and a half, almost two, since I met Edward. My recklessness had skyrocketed. I never would have considered helping anyone else essentially rob a bank, but I never batted an eyelash when I did it for Edward. I was spontaneous, nearly dragging Edward out of the car at the Vanity Fair party last year. I was so morally corrupt I didn't even know where to begin.

None of those things were necessarily good character developments. They were all typically things you hoped to grow out of as you got older.

It was late; one, maybe two in the morning. I snuck out of bed once Edward was asleep and came down to my little office. Once I started looking at the articles written about us, I just had this uncontrollable need to keep looking at them. Tonight, I had found one that was titled '27 Reasons Bella Swan Should Have Never Married Edward Cullen.'

I slammed my laptop shut and rubbed my eyes. My head was killing me and my brain was overloaded with 'what ifs', and that was never good. I turned off the dim light in the office and went back up to our bedroom. I didn't get into bed, it didn't feel right after what I just read, so I got in one of the comfortable chairs in the lounge area of our bedroom. Yes, the room was so big there was a lounge area.

I sat down and covered myself in a blanket, and stared at my husband sleeping in the bed across the room from me. His perfect face and rumbled hair and chiseled chest all called out to me, but I stayed frozen in my chair. I watched his chest rise and fall with his breaths, and listened to the soft snores that left him. Eventually he rolled over, his arm reaching out as if it were looking for me, and I heard a deep sigh when he found nothing but an empty bed.

Edward sat up, looking adorably exhausted, and ran a frustrated hand through his hair. He must have felt my eyes on him, because his head snapped to mine. "What are you doing?"

I averted my eyes from him the second he looked at me, and shrugged at his question. Pulling the blanket tighter around myself, I curled up in an even smaller ball in the large chair.

Edward walked over, clad only in a pair of boxers, and kneeled on the floor in front of me. The room was dark, nearly pitch black, but I could just make out his features in the dim light. He put his hands on my knees and for the first time, maybe ever, I flinched at his touch.

"What's wrong?" His eyes are on me; I could feel them, but I couldn't look at them. Edward's hand reached up to pull my attention to him, but I squeezed my eyes shut. "Bella. Look at me."

My eyes popped open and my heart broke all at once.

"What's wrong?"

My voice was small when I answered, weak. "Am I your whore?"

" _Bella_ ," I could hear the shock in his voice. I was sure that wasn't what he was expecting me to say. He didn't know I had been spending every night this week searching the internet for articles about us.

"You're a powerful man, it's one of the things I love about you. I don't care about the business power or your money, but you have a commanding personality. I like it. I like it when you use that and… take control when we're together.

"I think… I've had to be so in control of everything since I started working. I like that I don't have to be like that with you. Does that make me –"

"Stop. You are never to call yourself _my whore_ again, do you understand?" I didn't respond. "You're my wife. Our marriage is more than sex, Bella, and you know it. Where is this coming from?"

I wanted to shrug and hide myself away from him, but I knew that wouldn't solve any of our problems. I also knew Edward wouldn't let me do it. "I've been reading some things online." I admitted.

His hands cupped my face and gentle fingers pushed my hair out of my face. He looked so sad, so hurt that I would think these things. I hated my propensity to get so caught up on a thought that it ruled everything else, that it made me forget what I knew was true.

"You're my girl. I love you for a hell of a lot more than your body, as spectacular as that is."

I slump into the chair. _I knew that_. "I'm sorry. Sometimes I just get… lost in my mind and things get fuzzy."

Edward wrapped his arms around me and easily lifted me into his arms. "No more articles online, okay?" He settled me into bed and got in beside me, his arms clutching me to him.

I sighed and buried my head into his neck, letting the comforting scent that was just Edward envelop me. "Okay."

…rep…

This was my last free weekend for the foreseeable future. I had to go to New York next week for some meetings about the tour, and then the tour announcement on the Today Show. Then, once I got back, it was a solid month of rehearsals before two months of shows. There were only ten shows total, but there was a good amount of downtime between them sometimes. It had only been a week since _Hopeless Kingdom_ came out, but we wanted to keep the momentum going.

Edward tried to talk himself into staying home from work today after my freak out last night, but I told him I would be fine. He would spend all weekend with me before I left, and that was more than enough. He missed too much work because of me.

It was raining, which fit my still gloomy mood after last night. I pulled on the button-down shirt Edward wore to work yesterday and went to sit at the piano in my office. I just sat there for a while, tinkering with the keys and letting odd little lyrics escape.

" _Pauses, then says, 'You're my best friend.' And you knew what it was, he is in love."_

"That's beautiful."

My head snaps around and I see Alice and Rosalie standing in the doorway. "What are you doing here?"

"We knocked for a long time, but you didn't answer. We wanted to apologize."

I took a good look at them. They weren't in their usual pretty dresses or fancy blouses. They had on comfortable yoga pants and t-shirts. Their hair wasn't perfectly styled, and their makeup not impeccable as usual.

"It's easy to get sucked into this life. Things are expected of us, and we forget about ever living any way else. You know how to draw a line, though. You just… you intimidated us and we didn't know how to act around you." Alice said.

Rosalie stepped up. "We didn't mean to make you feel bad about yourself. We didn't know another way to make us feel good about ourselves, as horrible as that sounds. We're sorry."

I stared at them for a minute. I didn't know if I could really trust that they would never piss me off or make me feel like shit again, but they were trying. I could try, too. "Thank you."

"We brought junk food. Lots of junk food. We thought we could spend some time together… if that's okay with you?"

We got comfortable in the movie room and put on a random romantic comedy that Alice brought. We spent most of the movie talking, though. There were no backhanded compliments or rude comments about my clothing or schedule. There was just food and laughs. It was nice.

"Was it weird? Filming about your life with Edward, but it not actually being Edward you were with?" Rosalie asked me at one point.

"It was weirder than it was with Badlands, because I still had Edward. But, it's also my job. It kind of just comes naturally. The worst part was the sex scenes. Bleh."

"Yeah, but Noah's hot."

I scowled at that, but it was true. Noah was attractive, and had features that were similar to Edward. That's why he got the part. "Yeah, but he's no Edward."

"I always thought Edward would be amazing in bed." Rosalie blurted out with a laugh.

"Excuse me?"

"No, no, I never would have followed through with it. But, the women in our circle talk. A few of them have, uh, been with Edward."

I didn't like that. The idea of another woman with Edward made me want to throw up.

"I'm sorry, I messed up again, didn't I?"

"No, it's okay. I can't be mad at how many women he was with before we even met."

"Yes, you can, it's a wife's right. But, I'm sure you have a string of guys devastated you're married now, too." Alice smirked, stuffing some more popcorn in her face. She was adorable when she wasn't being so condescending.

I had to laugh at that. "Not exactly."

"How many guys had you dated before? Surely every guy you ever met was dying to go out with you. You're… you."

"Um… three? I didn't date much before Edward."

"Three? But every magazine…"

"All trash. Never believe anything you read in those."

"So, who…?"

"Well, Peter and I, my friend who owns the label, we dated for a month or two. He was my first 'boyfriend.' We were much better as friends though. Nothing serious ever happened between us. Then Theo, the guy from the _Clash_ series, we dated for about six months. He was my, uh, _first_. And then…" I had never really told many people about Jacob. Our relationship was very hush hush, but I knew these girls wouldn't go blabbing to a magazine. "Then there was Jacob."

"Jacob Black? He's who _Badlands_ is about?"

I shrugged. Everything about that relationship was doomed from the start, but my naïve little brain thought it was perfect. I was so stupid, I knew that now. But, I also didn't give a crap about it anymore.

"Okay, I bet _he's_ good in bed." Alice laughed.

"Actually… no. I don't have much experience, but compared to Edward he was just awful." Both of the girls looked at me with their mouths hanging open before they burst into a fit of giggles. "I thought he was, at the time. I didn't know better, I was just figuring out sex myself for the first time. I mean, I was only nineteen when we were together. Sex made me shy and uncomfortable, but I knew he wanted it. I got more into it eventually, but I started to like the idea, the fantasy, more than the actual act. That's _not_ the case with Edward."

"I knew it. I knew he would be good!" Rosalie laughed. "Well, you definitely seem to have come into your own now."

We spent the afternoon watching movies and talking about boys. It was the most normal afternoon with friends I had ever had, I think. Alice mentioned in passing that Edward had a thing for snickerdoodles and I asked her and Rosalie to teach me how to make them. They made a batch with me and showed me how, and then I made one myself.

While I was focusing solely on cookies, they wandered into my office, and I could vaguely hear them talking about the awards hanging everywhere. Just as I was pulling out a tray of cookies from the oven, I heard the front door close.

"Bella?" Edward shouted. He sounded nervous, but I couldn't blame him. I'm sure he could smell something cooking in here, and me and the kitchen didn't really mix well. His eyes looked over the various trays full of cookies as he entered the kitchen. "What is all of this?"

He immediately reached for the batch the girls and I made together. "No! Try one of these." I handed him one I just took out of the oven, and was rewarded with a deep groan as he ate it. _Success!_

"Do you like it?"

Edward quickly finished his cookie and lifted me on to the counter. "It's fucking delicious. You made these for me?" His smile was adorable, especially with a little bit of sugar still stuck to his lips.

I was so distracted by the lips and the eyes and the hair that my fingers were running through that I forgot to answer. I kissed him, tasting the sweet sugar on his lips but enjoying the taste of him more.

"Bella! When did you get an Emmy? I didn't know – "

Alice and Rose returned, each holding some kind of statue in their hands. They stood there and smirked at us as I pushed Edward away and slid off of the counter.

"Um, I got it for my guest role in _Unknown_." I wiped my mouth and tried to remember what I was doing before Edward got here.

"I told you he liked snickerdoodles." Rose laughed as she looked over at Edward with a cookie in each hand.

He eyed me for a moment, and it was like we had a silent conversation. He wanted to know if I was okay with Alice and Rose being here, so I gave him a small nod.

The girls left not long after that. I thoroughly enjoyed our day we spent together. All of the grudges and animosity were gone, and we could just be friends. I didn't have many genuine friends; I was glad I could potentially have a few new ones in Alice and Rose.

Edward pressed me against the door the moment they were gone. "Are you sure you're okay?" His forehead rested against mine and his hands wrapped around my waist.

I sighed and leaned into him. "Yeah, I'm good."

…rep…

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Seriously? These fuckers.

I was in a meeting with various people from Pacific. They were a large credit card company and had approached me about a partnership and a tour sponsorship. I readily agreed, and the main reason I was in New York this week was to sign on the dotted line.

Except, now they were backing out.

"Ms. Swan –"

"It's Mrs. Cullen," I corrected the man across from me. If they were going to play games like this, I was done with the pleasantries.

He cleared his throat, obviously uncomfortable, and continued. "Mrs. Cullen. We don't feel that we are a good fit for your image anymore. We're withdrawing our sponsorship and partnership agreement."

They didn't like my husband. That was all it was. They were scared of him and that was it. I had discovered that people were either dying to work with Edward Cullen, or they were petrified of the thought of him. The people at Pacific seem to be in the latter group, unfortunately for me.

"Fuckers," I muttered under my breath. I stood to leave, and my lawyer and Kate followed closely behind.

Flashes erupted around me as I left the building, and vulgar heckles surrounded me.

"Give us a sexy smile, Bella!"

"Bella, what's it like fucking a murderer?"

Ben wrapped an arm around me and did his best to shield me from the photos, but I could still hear everything. I could still hear the shouts as we got into the car. Once we were on the road I pulled my phone out to text Edward.

 _Tour is off. Coming home this afternoon._

His response was immediate.

 **What happened?**

 _Sponsors pulled out._

I rested my head back against the seat and closed my eyes. Just a few hours and I would be back home.

It was late afternoon when the plane landed in Chicago, and when I turned my phone back on I had a message from Edward telling me to meet him at his office when I got back. That was fine with me, because I had a rant building up inside me the whole flight, and I needed to get it out.

Unlike the swarm that followed me in New York, there were only two photographers waiting outside of Edward's office. I gave them each a small smile as I passed.

I ignored everyone I passed on my way to Edward's office; the receptionist and his secretary tried to talk to me as I strolled by, but I didn't have time for them.

"Those fucking cowards." I growled once I had the door closed behind me. Edward sat back in his chair and rested his clasped hands on his stomach. He gave me a nod, giving me the go ahead to continue on my rant.

"We had the whole goddamn contract written up and everything. Money had been allocated, people hired, the whole deal. Then they decide they don't like my _image_ anymore?" I threw my purse on an empty chair and started pacing back and forth. "I've given the public… everything. They know everything about me. I let them in and they're fucking me over now."

I plopped myself in the chair across from Edward and laid my head back. I was suddenly exhausted from everything. The meetings, the flight, and the fuming.

"You're too nice."

My eyes popped open and I stared at my husband. "Excuse me?"

"You're too giving to the public. You're right, they have fucked you over. So, maybe it's time to fuck them. Figuratively speaking, of course."

"I don't understand."

"E.C. Inc. would like to sponsor the _Hopeless Kingdom Tour_. You can do whatever you want, but I would like to make one suggestion."

The second the words left his mouth I shook my head. No. I wouldn't let him do that. He didn't give me a chance to protest, though.

"Get exclusive. Do how many shows you want, not how many you think the public wants. You can do small venues or go for a fucking stadium. Do things your way, not theirs."

"Edward, you can't – "  
"Oh, I can. Come with me." Edward helped me out of the chair and tugged me toward the door. His hand rested on my waist as he led me through the office. Nearly every eye in the place was focused on us. We got to another door and Edward held it open for me.

It was a conference room, filled with people, mostly men, sitting at a long table. Everyone stood when we walked in. Edward nudged me toward the end of the table, and pulled out the chair for me. I sat, because I didn't know what else I could do, and Edward placed a folder I didn't know he had in front of me. _What is happening?_

Edward went to sit at the other end of the table, completely opposite of me. "Isabella, this is the board of E.C. Inc. We're here to discuss the terms of our sponsorship contract."

…rep…

It took me a week to sign the contract Edward had written up. I needed to think. Plan and strategize. I didn't know what I wanted to happen now. The only thing I knew for certain was that I was cutting back. Cutting back on press and appearances, and cutting back on all interaction with people regarding my career.

After spending hours on the phone with Heidi and Claire and my tour manager, and about a million other people, we had a plan.

Ten shows. All stadiums. Nothing else.

Once this tour was done, I was too. At least for a while. But, until then, I was going to work my ass off and pray that I could actually sell out a stadium.

A month after that disastrous meeting I was heading back to New York to announce the tour. I was awake at an ungodly hour and was sitting in my chair, waiting patiently for the commercial break to be over so my segment could begin.

Just seconds before we went live, I saw Kate trying to get my attention. It was hard to see her past all of the lights and the crew, but I could just make out mild panic on her face. _That can't be good._

"We're back with three-time Academy Award winner Isabella Cullen. Isabella, we know you've got an announcement for us, but we'd like to talk to you about a story that just broke first. An interview was just released with a woman, Tanya Denali. She claims to have dated your husband for a period of time three years ago. She described him as demanding and volatile. What do you think about that?"

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Nothing could go right these days. "That's definitely not what I'm here to discuss." I said as politely as I could.

"I understand. But apparently a few women have come forward about stories regarding your husband. One woman described him as "very demeaning, emotionally and sexually.' You've always been an advocate for equality, especially for women."

"Jesus," I muttered under my breath. "I'm not here to discuss my husband." I ignore the interviewer as she opens her mouth to keep asking rude and intrusive questions. I look at the camera with a smile and keep talking. "I'm here to announce a ten-show stadium tour across the country. These will be the only shows supporting my _Hopeless Kingdom_ album. You'll be able to find a full list of dates and sale times online." A man right behind the camera starts counting down. "It'll be the last time you all see me for a while, so I hope to see you all there."

The camera shut off and someone announced a commercial break. I look to the woman across from me. "Ambush me again and I won't be so nice about it."

I got up and started pulling all of the mic strings off of me. I tossed the pack on the floor and stormed past Kate. "We need to get the fuck out of here."

I didn't speak to anyone. I didn't talk to Kate in the car on the way to the airport, and I didn't text Edward that I was on my way home like I usually would.

I read the articles on the plane. There were four women, all who had dated Edward in the past. They talked about their relationship with him, and discussed where their relationships went wrong. One even said she were worried about me because she thought Edward was probably manipulating me.

I wanted to strangle them.

I was scrolling through Twitter when I decided I had enough. I typed out what needed to be said, sent it, and deleted the app from my phone.

 _I've spent five years letting you all into every aspect of my life. I have given you everything I had since the moment I started my career. But, this is where my openness ends._

 _You know why. You know what you've done._

I was exhausted by the time I got home. It was only late afternoon, but all I wanted was to curl up in bed and sleep for the next month. Heidi tried to call me about ten times, and Edward double that. I just didn't have the energy to deal with any of it.

After a quick shower, I pulled on one of Edward's shirts and curled up in bed. Just as I got comfortable I heard the door slam downstairs. I heard his steps as he wandered through the house looking for me. My eyes closed and I evened out my breathing.

After a few moments I felt one of his hands gently run through my hair, but I did my best to stay still. I needed time to sort out my own thoughts before I talked to him.

Soft lips pressed lightly to my forehead. "I'll be in my office."

Damn. He knew I was faking.

I drifted off to sleep eventually. It wasn't a restful sleep by any means, it was filled with visions of Edward and countless beautiful women. Words and scenarios from the articles I read earlier flashed through my mind and I hated every second of it.

It was irrational, I knew that. I couldn't be mad at Edward for having a past, but I could be mad at those women for looking for five minutes of fame by talking about my husband. I doubted anything they said was an outright lie though.

Edward was never demeaning toward me, emotionally or sexually, but he was demanding. He liked it rough sometimes, but I did too. I just needed to forget about this whole situation.

My focus needed to be on these ten shows that could very well be my last, and that was it. The public's opinion on me was no longer my concern. I was going to do what I wanted and if they liked it, great, if not, that was fine.

I sat up with a sigh and stumbled out of bed toward Edward's office. I shouldn't have ignored him when he got home.

He was in his office, as he said he would be, but he wasn't working. He was just sitting there, and I could tell he had been fuming.

"Hi," I whispered as I walked in. I ignored the chair opposite of him and opted for his lap instead. I straddled his legs and wrapped my arms around his neck, playing with the short hairs there that I could reach.

I knew he was about to apologize, but I cut him off with a kiss before he could. This wasn't his fault. Those women did what they did because they wanted attention. I couldn't blame them for being disappointed they no longer had Edward, I would be devastated if I ever lost him.

My lips were harsh against his. I needed him to make me forget all of the shit we've had to deal with lately. It seemed like every few weeks something new went wrong, and I was tired of it.

Once Edward got the hint his hands cupped my ass and squeezed, crushing me into his growing erection. He pulled his lips from mine, but I just moved on to his neck. "We should talk about… fuck."

My hips started a steady rhythm over his. "I'm done." I told him, my words muffled against his neck. "I'm done making everyone else happy. I don't care anymore." I moved over to the other side of his neck, because it deserved some attention, too. "After these ten shows I'm coming back here. I just need time to be me, to be with you."

Edward pulled me away from his neck and held my head in his hands so I couldn't distract him. "You're okay?"

I smirked. "Yeah. Fuck them. Now, if you wouldn't mind fucking _me_ …"

In a matter of seconds Edward was standing with my legs wrapped around him, walking down the hall toward our room. Our lips duel on the short walk, his tongue sliding with mine in the most amazing dance.

Edward set me on my feet at the foot of the bed. I switched our positions, so he was closer to the bed, and pushed him backward. I couldn't have moved him if he didn't want to be moved, but he fell backward with a smirk. He let out a string of curses as I dropped my panties from underneath my t shirt and climbed into his lap.

I got the shirt he was wearing out of the way quickly and took my time kissing, licking, and enjoying the feeling of his skin under my hands. Simply put, Edward was built. He had those perfect abs that looked so good you thought they were airbrushed. The muscles on his arms bulged out, but they weren't so big he looked too bulky. I never felt safer than when they were wrapped around me.

I spent the most time kissing the new script that was inked over his heart on his left pec. Our wedding date. I turned into a blubbering mess when he showed it to me, and it was now my favorite part of him to kiss.

Edward took advantage of my distraction and slid a hand under me. An odd squeak escaped me when he started rubbing gentle circles against my clit. I pulled his hand away, a bit begrudgingly. "Don't distract me."

I shimmied Edward out of his sweatpants and threw them to the side. When I situated myself back in his lap, his hard cock sandwiched between his abdomen and me, he finally lost it.

"Either get to riding my cock, or let me take over." Edward's voice was rough and ragged. His hands gripped my hips and rocked me over his cock, coating it in the wetness that had gathered between my legs.

I pulled his hands from my hips and pressed them into the mattress. Gripping the heavy weight of his cock in one hand, I sank down onto him, eliciting a delicious groan from Edward.

I gripped his shoulders for support and started rocking my hips with his. Edward's hands gripped my hips and helped guide my movements. My nails dug into the flesh of his shoulders. I looked down at the man underneath me and I suddenly couldn't get close enough to him.

I wrapped my arms around him and nestled my head into his neck. My lips attached to the soft skin there, and Edward's arms wrapped around me and rolled us both over. I groaned at the weight of him pressing me deeper into the mattress.

Edward wrapped both of my legs tightly around his waist and began pounding into me. Every thrust of his hips, every slap of skin made me groan or moan or scream. Everything was too good; his breath surrounded me every time he huffed out a jagged breath and his skin slid easily against mine as our bodies worked up a sweat.

"You're fucking perfect," Edward mumbled against my lips. His teeth came out to nibble on my bottom lip. "I can never get enough of you." He kissed down my neck and attached his lips to my breasts, showing each one equal attention. "There's nothing better than feeling you come around my cock." He grunted out, his thrusts becoming more erratic.

My arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him as close to me as possible. My right hand started to shake, leftover nerve damage from the shooting made it do that sometimes. Edward felt the tremors against his neck and grabbed my hand in his. He kept our intertwined hands between us, holding it against his chest.

Edward's hands got harsher and his thrusts harder. His name left my mouth in a scream as my entire body started to spasm around him. I felt him come in long spurts inside of me.

"I love feeling you come inside me." I mumbled, not really even sure what was coming out of my mouth. Sometimes my thoughts slipped out due to my Edward-induced-haze.

"There's that dirty talk," Edward chuckled. "Always late to the game, but always sexy." He kissed me quickly and rolled us over again so I was lying on his chest.

"I'm not good with the dirty talk like you." I whispered. I could hardly even talk about dirty talk.

A contented sigh left Edward as his hands rested lightly on my waist and his eyes closed. "We'll have to keep working on it."

We gave ourselves a few more minutes to catch our breath and then Edward carried me to the shower. His hands were feather light as they washed over every inch of my skin, and I returned the favor.

We ended up in bed again, but indulged in nothing more than light touches and chaste kisses as we talked. We steered clear of the topic of the women coming forward about Edward, and talked more about my newfound outlook on life.

"Are you sure this is what _you_ want?"

"Yes. I feel… free. I've been so bogged down by wanting to make everyone else happy that I wasn't happy. But I don't have all of that guilt now." I looked over at the clock behind Edward and saw it was still relatively early, only about nine. "Let's go out."

Edward's brows shot up. "Out?"

"Yeah. Take me on a date. We could go to a late dinner or to a bar… anywhere."

We ended up going to a small Irish pub downtown. Jasper owned it so we had a nice reserved table in the back corner. We sat and drank and laughed. It felt good to be out with Edward, it felt good not to care what people were thinking about as they stared at us.

It felt good to be free.

…rep…

"Who are you, and what have you done with my best friend. Bella Cullen, have you seen her?" Kate asked as she came up to me after rehearsal. We just had about a week left of rehearsals before the first show, and I was feeling good about the whole thing.

Everything was falling into place and I was happy. Truly, blissfully happy. It wasn't a mood Kate was used to seeing on me.

"I've missed you," I told her, wrapping my arms tightly around her. We were back in work mode, so Kate came up to Chicago the last week before the tour started. I was happy about my decision to take an extended break from work, but that also meant I wouldn't be needing Kate as much. She would be fine, financially, I knew. I paid her well and she and Garrett were moving in together once her lease was up. She would be well taken care of, but I would miss her constant companionship.

Kate and I talked for a while after rehearsal was over, and parted ways as she went back to her hotel to call Garrett and I headed back home. I was a mess, wearing a sports bra and a pair of cropped leggings, and I was sweaty and sore.

I expected the house to be empty, Edward wasn't due home for another hour or so, but the moment I walked in there were shouts coming from the living room.

"You should've fucking told me!" Edward shouted. His entire family was here. Carlisle was on the receiving end of Edward's wrath, and Jasper and Emmett flanked him. Alice and Rosalie sat huddled together on the sofa, and Esme stood next to her husband.

Part of me wanted to sneak upstairs and not get involved in whatever this was, but I knew that wasn't an option.

"Edward, your father has done the best he can, considering the circumstances."

"No, he fucking hasn't. He should've stepped aside before it got this bad."

I stepped forward, unsure of what else to do. Alice and Rosalie shook their heads at me, but I ignored them and gently grabbed Edward's hand. "What's wrong?"

Edward's head snapped toward me. His eyes were harsh, but I knew it wasn't because of me. They softened as he looked at me until he looked so sad I could hardly stand it.

"What is it?"

Edward's fury was back as he looked at his father again. "Are you going to tell her about how your fuck up nearly killed her, or should I?"

Carlisle looked sufficiently rebuked, but equally annoyed. "We don't have time for this, Edward."

"We're making time!" Edward bellowed.

I had never seen him this mad. He was practically shaking with rage. I didn't know what was going on, but I knew I needed to diffuse the situation before things got too out of hand. "Edward, it's fine. Whatever it is –"

"Carlisle has a brain tumor." _Shit_. That was definitely not what I expected. I looked over at Carlisle and Esme, and she nodded her head sadly. If we were having this big of an argument about it, maybe it wasn't too serious. Maybe there were treatment options.

My brows furrowed. I didn't understand what that had to do with me.

"It's pressed right up against the part of his brain that controls his emotions. It's been why he's acted like an even bigger dick than usual the last few years. It's why he tried to push us toward the Volturi's so much. It's why he hated you so fucking much he paid off James to go to Aro and tell him about you."

"He didn't know what he was doing, Edward!" Esme shouted at him.

"She can't have kids! She's got scars covering her body and she'll have tremors in her arm for the rest of her life! He _knew_. He knew he was out of control and he should've had me take over before he nearly got my wife killed. Jesus, you were so unstable you pointed a gun at her fucking _head_." Edward violently pushed his hands through his hair. He was losing it, but I was frozen in my spot. I couldn't think, couldn't move.

"After this, I want you gone. I don't care where you're getting the treatment, just get the fuck out of this city."

Edward grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the room, toward the stairs. The door slammed behind us, shaking nearly the whole house. He didn't look at me, he paced the room and shoved things out of his way as he went. A chair was flipped over and a lamp shattered on the floor.

I sat on the edge of the bed, my mind racing. "I… I don't understand."

"That fucking… he's sick. He's going to a hospital in the northeast for treatment. They say he's got good odds. The tumor is pretty big, they think it's been there for at least two, maybe three years, but they're optimistic they should be able to remove it with the right treatment. He's been more impulsive lately, made stupid, reckless decisions. That's why.

"It's why he was always so hot and cold with you. It's what gave him the stupid fucking idea to work with Volturi. He knew about you before I ever told him about us. He paid James off to out you to Volturi. He was just sabotaging every fucking thing with no clue about what he was doing."

I stared at my hands and started nervously picking at my nails. It was an anxious habit that rarely came out anymore. I heard a loud crash and looked up to see a dresser on its side.

Edward came to kneel in front of me, his hands cupped my face and brushed away the silent tears that I didn't even know were falling. " _I'm so sorry_."

"It's not your fault."

"There's one more thing."

Fuck. "What?"

"Carlisle is leaving, stepping down because he can't be in charge anymore. I'm taking over."

He didn't have to say the words. I knew what he was taking over. The family. The business. The city, practically.

"There's a small ceremony, just with the family. You'll need to be there."

I nodded because I didn't trust my voice to not betray me.

"Is this… you've wanted this, right? It's a good thing?"

Edward waited a moment before responding. "Yes. This is what I've worked toward for a long time."

I gave him a determined nod. If this was what he wanted then I could get behind him on it. "Okay." I brushed past him and went straight for the shower.

I had to get ready.

…rep…

I was nervous. Really, really fucking nervous. Tonight, was the first show on the Hopeless Kingdom Tour and we were starting out in Chicago. Soldier Field. Sold out.

Every show had sold out actually. It was amazing. And stressful.

Edward has been unbelievably busy since he took over for Carlisle a week ago. He was hardly sleeping and only ate if I practically forced it down his throat. I hated how overworked he was becoming, but I didn't say anything about it. He told me that day he took over that he would be busy for a while. He needed to solidify his status now that he was in charge. I didn't ask for many details about what that meant, but the papers told me.

There had been an influx of murders lately, and I was pretty sure my husband was behind most of them.

I couldn't think about that, at least not right now. Ben and Eric followed closely behind Kate and I as we made our way back to my dressing room. They were constantly by my side these days. It was just a precaution, and I had to admit I liked having them near. Just in case.

Kate and I relaxed in my dressing room for a while. I needed idle chit chat to calm my nerves. This tour was different from my last. There were no meet and greets, no items to sign before the show. We were focusing solely on the music this time.

Flowers arrived for me around two, with a note from Edward.

 _Bella, something has come up. I will be there for the show, I promise. In case I don't get there in time to see you before-hand, good luck. Not that you need it. I love you._

I sighed and tossed the letter on the table in front of me. I brought the beautiful vase of flowers to my lap and sniffed. The flowers made me smile, but they didn't make up for the fact that Edward wasn't here. I missed him.

Alice and Rosalie showed up a little while later. They were decked out in Hopeless Kingdom merch and it made me smile. They talked with Kate and I while Chrissy got me ready.

I texted Edward an hour before the show was set to start, but I never got a response. I knew when I hadn't heard from him twenty minutes before I was set to go on he wasn't going to make it. My suspicion was confirmed when I got a text five minutes before show time.

 **I'm so fucking sorry.**

I didn't respond, and I tried my best not to think about it during the show. It was easy to get lost, the music surrounded me and the sea of people singing the words back gave me the peace of mind I needed to put on a good show. Or, as Kate told me when I got off stage, a really fucking good show.

Ben drove me home, alone. Edward never showed, and I didn't know if he would even be home when I got there. My usual post-show high had been dulled by the disappointment of Edward not showing up, so all I wanted to do was take a shower and get in bed.

I heard Edward shouting in his office when I got in. I trudged up the stairs and saw him in his office, phone glued to his ear. He looked up at me as he listened to whoever was on the other end, his apology clear in his eyes. I gave him a sad smile and a little wave and went to take a shower.

A few minutes later strong arms wrapped around my waist as I washed my hair, and kisses were peppered along my neck. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay." I shrugged. I wasn't really okay with it, but I couldn't blame him for being busy. I had no clue what his jobs entailed, but I knew they were stressful.

"It's not. It won't be like this forever, I promise. Shit just… got out of control tonight."

I turned around to rinse my hair, coming face to face with Edward. "I understand."

His hand cupped my cheek as he looked down at me. "I really am sorry."

I reached up to give him a quick peck. "I know."

Edward turned his head so my quick peck turned into needy tongues slipping and sliding together. He backed me up so I hit the cool tile. "Let me make it up to you."

"You don't have to." I breathed out, but he was already trailing warm kisses down my body. He stopped at each of my breasts, and then spent time showing some attention to the tattoo on my hip, his tattoo.

I yelped a little bit when he lifted both of my thighs over his shoulders. I felt unstable at first, but his hands rested on my lower back and gave me a little more support. There was no teasing, he just dove right in between my thighs, his tongue caressing my wet skin in slow, even strokes.

It wasn't enough. "More."

"Yes, ma'am." One of his hands left my back and he quickly thrust two fingers inside me while he sucked my clit. His fingers were fast and harsh and his tongue matched their pace.

"Tell me how it feels, Bella."

"So – ah – so good," I could hardly think straight. I looked down at the bronze mop of hair between my legs and caught the sight of Edward's tongue peeking out and flicking over my flesh. His eyes, dark with lust, met mine and I lost it. I had no control while my hips sought out more of him as I fell apart around him.

Edward brought me down from my high slowly, softly lapping at my sensitive flesh before he set me back on shaky legs.

"You… you're forgiven."

…rep…

Edward made it out to three of the ten shows. He sent me flowers before each one, and always called me right before and right after if he wasn't there. I think he was still trying to make up for missing the show in Chicago, but that was long since forgiven.

The last show was at the Rose Bowl in California, and when it was done I was free. I spent a few days after it in Los Angeles, but Edward had to go right back to Chicago. I finally met the man who stole Kate's heart, and gave her my complete approval, not that she really needed it. I was happy she was happy.

I packed up a few random things I had decided I wanted with me in Chicago, since I wouldn't need to be back in Los Angeles for the foreseeable future.

Edward had a big business party tonight, so I was flying back this afternoon for it. It had something to do with the profit they made this quarter, or something like that. He used a lot of business terms when telling me about it and most of it went right over my head, but I nodded at the right parts and agreed to be there for him.

As difficult as it was, I got ready on the plane. We were supposed to take off earlier, but I got stuck in traffic on the way to the airport this afternoon. I straightened my navy blue body-con dress as I got off of the plane and into the car waiting for me.

I texted Edward that I was on my way; we had agreed to meet at the event because I was running late. I was escorted in the hotel by Ben, and he led me to the ballroom the event was taking place in.

My eyes only had to search for a few moments before I saw Edward's messy mop of copper hair. I immediately zeroed in on the blond fawning over him. I recognized her immediately from the photos that went with the articles written months ago. The one's about Edward's past girlfriends.

I walked over to them with a purpose, Edward's back was to me so he didn't know I was coming. I did see him step away from her multiple times, but she was always quick to follow. When I reached him, I hooked my arm with his and gripped his bicep. "Sorry I'm late."

I smiled up at Edward and he smirked down at me. "I'm sorry, we haven't met. I'm Bella Cullen." I held my hand out to the woman who was just fawning over my husband. She was an attention seeker, and I knew subtly letting her know I didn't recognize her would drive her crazy.

"Tanya," she scoffed, ignoring my outstretched hand.

Edward's voice was low and menacing when he spoke before taking a sip of his drink. "Don't disrespect my wife."

Tanya was quick to shake my hand after that.

I spent the rest of the night on Edward's arm. He introduced me to his colleagues, and I recognized several faces from the meeting I had with him about his company sponsoring the tour. Most of them came to the Chicago show and made polite conversation about how they enjoyed themselves.

It was a surprisingly pleasant evening. Edward and I were on our way out when his name was called. He turned, but immediately tensed. I turned as well, and saw Aro Volturi walking toward us, a young woman on his arm.

 **A/N: I wasn't originally going to stop this one here, but this chapter kind of got away from me. The next chapter will answer a lot of questions and I'll get it out as soon as I possibly can.**

 **As always, thank you to everyone who reviews. I may not reply to all of them, but I read every single one and they make my day.**

 **I would also strongly recommend listening to the songs these next few chapters are titled after, or at least taking a good look at the lyrics posted before each one. Lots of little hints in the lyrics!**


	10. Look What You Made Me Do

_I don't like your little games, don't like your tilted stage. The role you made me play, of the fool, no, I don't like you. I don't like your perfect crime, how you laugh when you lie. You said the gun was mine, isn't cool, no, I don't like you. But I got smarter, I got harder in the nick of time. Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **Look What You Made Me Do**_

…rep…

"Don't say anything." Edward whispered to me just seconds before Aro and the young woman approached us.

"Aro, I don't recall you being on the guest list this evening."

"Oh, I wasn't dear boy. I just had someone I wanted your lovely wife to meet." Aro gestured to the woman next to him. She looked oddly familiar, but I couldn't place her. "Isabella, this is Elena Rossi."

Shit. She was the woman Edward had me blacklist. I nodded at her politely. "Hello."

Edward's arm around my waist tightened. His whole body was tense. There was definitely more to this than Aro introducing me to an acquaintance, but I couldn't figure out what it was.

Edward spoke up, his voice rough. "Don't do this to her here."

"Ah, how else am I supposed to get to her? You keep her so… well guarded."

That was a thinly veiled threat, and everyone here knew it. I kept my eyes on the woman. She was just so familiar. I knew I had seen her before, but I couldn't figure out where for the life of me.

"Not that you need to protect her from me. I am her father, after all."

My stomach dropped.

My heart stopped.

My ears started ringing.

"I went through a bit of a rebellious phase in my youth and met Elena in Port Angeles in Washington twenty-four years ago."

Twenty-four years ago. I was about to turn twenty-three. This woman was my mother. The one who left me in a goddamn trashcan.

The woman in front of me took a step closer, her arms raised, asking for a hug.

"Don't fucking touch her."

"She's my daughter." The woman scoffed. "She's mine."

I backed away from her, my body shaking with… something. Rage. Sadness. Everything. "I'm not your daughter. You left me in a fucking trashcan."

"I had to, baby. I wasn't ready to settle down. But, look at you now! You followed my dreams, and now you can help me, too. I always dreamed of being an actress. Going to fancy award shows, having people fawn all over me… you can help me be there, right by you!"

I was pretty sure she was high. Her eyes were a little red and she just seemed too over the top. I didn't know her sober, but I doubted this was it. All I could do was shake my head and try to put as much distance between this woman and myself as possible.

"Stay away from her." Edward told the both of them, the threat in his voice clear. He wrapped his arm tighter around my waist, and supported most of my weight as he rushed me out to the car.

The drive home was silent. My heart was pounding and I felt nauseous. I was worried if I opened my mouth the contents of my stomach would come out, and not the million questions I had bouncing around in my head.

I rushed into the house the second Edward parked the car, and ran up to our bedroom ensuite. Edward found me there, hunched over the toilet. He pulled my hair out of my face, and ran a soothing hand along my back. When there was nothing left in my stomach, I began dry heaving, which eventually turned into me hyperventilating.

"You need to calm down, Bella. It's okay. I've got you, you're fine." Edward repeated words of comfort, but they did little to calm down my overactive mind.

Aro Volturi was my biological father. I was, biologically speaking, a member of the family Edward always wanted nothing to do with.

"I – I don't understand." I gasped out. My heart was still racing, but I just couldn't piece all of this together. There were too many missing pieces.

Edward let me brush my teeth before he pulled me into the closet. He helped me unzip my dress and pulled one of his shirts over my head. We sat on the plush chairs in our little sitting area. Edward rested his elbows on his knees, and held my hands in his.

Then he told me the story. My story, really.

Carlisle's father, Ronan, had a long history with the Volturi's. They were always rivals, so Ronan was having all members of the Volturi family followed, Aro included. He found out about the affair twenty-two-year-old Aro had with sixteen-year-old Elena in Port Angeles. Ronan knew about the pregnancy and planned on holding it over the Volturi's. The picture I got out of the safe deposit box was his.

Ronan used the photo's he had to blackmail Aro's father, Dontai. Dontai was in the process of arranging a marriage between Aro and a respectable Italian woman and knew that if word got out he had an illegitimate child, the deal would be off.

Dontai Volturi killed Ronan Cullen. He got all evidence of the child, of me, and was able to keep the arranged marriage between Aro and Sulpicia.

Edward told me he thought Aro had kept tabs on me most of my life. He knew I was out there, and didn't want me causing him any trouble. He didn't like that I ended up with a Cullen, after everything his father did to get out from under the Cullen's influence. So, he killed two birds with one stone so to speak. He put a hit on me, his illegitimate child, but also the woman his rival's son was in love with. It was a win-win situation for him.

He started looking for my biological mother, Elena, when I survived the shooting. I guess he thought it was amusing that she had always dreamed of being an actress, and I ended up being one as well. That was why he was trying to pull strings for her, strings that I cut.

I had a lot to think about. A lot of things to come to terms with, but the most important was the man sitting in front of me. "I'm everything you hate."

Edward still had my hands clasped in his. "No, you're not. You're not a Volturi, Bella. You're a Cullen, through and through. Never think otherwise."

I twirled his wedding band around his finger for a while, just thinking. There was so much to come to terms with, I knew it would be spinning around in my brain for days. There was one question I needed answered now, though. "How do you know all of this?"

Edward flinched slightly at my question, like he was hoping I wouldn't ask it. "It's my job. Aro is our biggest threat, I needed to know what he was up to."

"So… you've known. All of this? For how long?"

"A couple of months. I found out after Carlisle left."

Months. He knew about this for months and never told me. He was only telling me now because Aro had cornered him into it. I pulled my hands out of his and sat up straight. "You've known for _months_?"

Edward nodded and stared at his empty hands.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"It's my job to keep you safe. This would have just hurt you, confused you. You were on tour and I didn't want to distract you."

"Bullshit." I was too furious to sit down. I stood and started pacing around the room. "This is my life. I deserved to know the second you knew."

"Bella, you know there are things I can't tell you –"

"I know! I don't ask about your work, Edward. I don't ask about the articles that mention you, and I don't ask questions when you leave the house a two in the morning. But I robbed a fucking bank for you. I blacklisted that… _woman_ because you asked me to. I was part of this and I deserved to fucking know!" I shouted.

The more I thought about it, the more betrayed I felt. I never gave Edward a reason to think he couldn't trust me with this information. He knew how affected I was by the whole adoption thing. He should've told me.

"No! You're my wife, Bella, you're not part of this side of things."

I stared at him, shocked at his words. He could use me to do things when he needed it, but I wasn't actually 'qualified' enough to know the end result when it was my own life. I grabbed one of my blankets off of the bed and a pillow. Edward grabbed my arm as I passed him. "I was just trying to protect you."

I pulled my arm out of his grasp and went to one of the guest rooms.

…rep…

I came upstairs from the basement. Edward had a nice gym down there, and I started back up with my daily workouts now that I had more free time. I had my headphones in and swayed my hips to the music as I walked into the kitchen. When I got there, I noticed Emmett and Jasper sitting at the island, plates of food in front of them.

I plucked my headphones out of my ears and set my phone down on the counter. "Emmett, Jasper," I greeted them with a smile.

Heading over to the corner where the blender was, I pulled it out and set it in the center of the island and went about getting the ingredients for my post-workout smoothie.

"How's, uh, how's it going, Bella?" Emmett asked me. I took a little pride in the nervousness of his voice.

It had been two weeks since the disastrous run in with Aro. I haven't talked to Edward since that night. I always go to sleep in the guest room, but every night Edward carries me to our bed. It pisses me off that he does it, but I also sleep infinitely better with him than I do alone. It was the only thing I let him get away with, though.

He would tell me good morning, but I would never reply. He calls me sometimes, and I answer, but simply wait for him to tell me what he wanted. Usually the call just ends with a grumbled "Fuck," before he hangs up.

Edward started working from home more. He tries to trick me into having to talk to him all of the time. It was annoying and only made me not want to talk to him more.

"I'm okay, you?" I asked Emmett, grabbing a banana out of the bowl behind me. I set it next to the blender and turned to the refrigerator for some milk and strawberries. Edward, of course, was leaning against it with his arms crossed over his chest.

"I'm, uh, good."

I reached my hand out for Edward's crotch, but he grabbed my arm before I could get there. "Not this time, sweetheart."

Before he could thwart my other hand, I quickly stuffed it down the front of his slacks and grabbed him through his boxers. I wasn't harsh, quite the opposite. I stroked his shaft a few times and felt him start to harden in my hand. He was much easier to push out of the way when he was distracted.

I pulled my hand out of his pants and grabbed what I needed out of the refrigerator.

"Man, she's literally got him by the balls." Jasper whispered to Emmett.

I set my supplies on the counter and pulled out a knife to start chopping up the fruit.

"Shit, she's got a knife. We're not doing this now, Edward." Emmett said.

My hand froze mid-slice and I looked at the two men across from me. "Doing what?"

"Well, Edward wanted us to tell you that we knew about it too. The whole Volturi situation."

I shrugged. "Yes, I assumed you both did. You're part of the family business. I'm just used whenever people deem me useful." I heard a frustrated sigh behind me as I resumed making my smoothie.

"So why are you talking to us?"

I dumped all of my ingredients into the blender and plugged it in. "Neither of you are my husband. You don't owe me anything."

"Bella," I started the blender before Edward could finish his sentence.

Jasper spoke as soon as the blender stopped. "We don't tell Alice or Rosalie about these things, Bella. It's not safe for them to know, just like it wasn't safe for you to know."

"It wasn't safe of me to steal that photo from be bank, either. You all had no problem letting me do that." I said as I poured my drink.

"It was for your own good, Bella." Edward whispered as he stood next to me.

I hated this. I hated being mad at him and I hated the fact that they were ganging up on me.

"I've been lied to and deceived about this my whole life. No one has ever told me the truth unless they were backed into it. I've been used for other people's personal gain more times than I can count. I just never thought you would be one of the people doing that to me." I locked eyes with Edward as I spoke, one of the first times I've really looked at him in days. He looked tired and sad and lost; exactly how I felt.

"So, excuse me for needing some time to fucking deal with it." I brushed past Edward and left a gaping Emmett and Jasper in the kitchen.

…rep…

Thunder cracked so loud I could feel the house shake. I hated storms, always have. It was irrational but when the wind would pick up and the thunder was so loud it made my ears ring, I was always afraid it was just going to blow the house away. It was stupid, but I had been scared of it since I was little.

Now, I was sequestered in the guest room I had been living in the past two and a half weeks. I had a blanket wrapped around my shoulders and stared out the window at the pouring rain, waiting for the next bolt of lightning to signal more thunder.

I wanted Edward; I wanted to be cuddled up next to him in bed as he read or worked. I wanted him to squeeze my hand every time he saw a flash because he knew the crack of thunder was coming right after, and I just wanted him back.

He didn't keep the information about Aro away from me vindictively, I've known that from the moment he told me. It just hurt. Everything hurt; him not telling me about the situation and then saying I wasn't part of that side of his life.

I had no desire to be one of his little minions or an active member of the family business, but I helped Edward when he needed me. But, I had to let it go. I had too many other more important things to worry about now.

I sucked up my pride. I tightened the blanket around my shoulders and hugged my pillow to my chest. When I got to our room the door was open, and a dim light was peeking out into the hall. I knocked on the doorframe lightly before glancing inside.

Edward was sitting in bed, his computer on his lap. He had on an adorable pair of thick-rimmed glasses and was scowling at the screen. His head popped up when he heard me knock.

"It's your bedroom, Bella, you don't have to knock."

"You were just trying to protect me." I mumbled.

Edward sighed and pushed his glasses up on his head. "I was just trying to protect you. I'm sorry I went about it the wrong way. For what it's worth, I would have told you soon."

I scurried across the room and hopped into bed. I knelt on the comforter, facing Edward. "I'm sorry I ignored you."

The room lit up with a flash of lightning and seconds later a bolt of thunder shook the house. Edward closed his computer and set his glasses on it on the bedside table. "Come here."

I laid my head on Edward's chest and wrapped my arms around as much of him as I could. Our legs intertwined and his arms pulled me as close to him as possible.

"I've missed you," I mumbled into his chest. I was asleep nearly instantly, but I was pretty sure I heard him say the same.

I woke before Edward in the morning, which was a rare accomplishment for me. He was always the first up, so I decided to take advantage of this little fluke.

I could already feel his morning wood against my thigh. After gently rolling Edward onto his back, I pushed the sheets off of us and settled myself between his legs. I pulled his cock out of his boxers and kissed along his length. Edward sighed, but didn't show any signs of waking up yet.

When I sucked lightly on just the head of his cock he let out a deep moan and his eyes snapped down to me. I kept up my ministrations and started a steady rhythm, bobbing my head over him.

"Your lips look so good around my cock, baby. So good." He groaned out. One of his hands came down and cupped my cheek, his thumb trailed along where my lips were stretched over his length.

Just a few minutes later Edward pulled my hair and let his cock pop out of my mouth. "Clothes off." He grunted out, and I quickly obliged.

Edward lost his boxers while I tore my own clothes off. He sat up, his back against the headboard, and motioned for me to straddle him. I did so quickly, and had his cock right at my entrance, but he stopped me before I could sink down onto him.

"Not yet," his warm hand cupped my center, and my head fell onto his shoulder at the sensation. Two of his fingers trailed along my slit and I bucked my hips into them. "Sucking my cock always makes you so wet." His fingers finally pushed their way inside and I groaned at the feeling. "Ride my cock, baby." His fingers were removed and he flicked the head of his cock over my clit a few times.

A deep groan filled my chest as I sank down on him, taking all of him in at once. I took a few moments to revel in the fullness, but it was too long for Edward. He smacked my ass, not too hard, and said, "Ride, Bella."

I immediately started bouncing my hips into his. Edward's hands roamed over my legs and up to my waist, eventually landing on my breasts. He kept one nipple in his mouth at all times. My arms wrapped around his neck and used his shoulders for leverage.

"Oh, God," I moaned out as one of his hands reached between us.

Edward pushed me back toward the foot of the bed and immediately covered my body with his. He pulled out of me, just his tip left, and slowed his pace. His thrusts were torturously slow.

The mood shifted as we went from frantic fucking to passionate love making. Edward's lips covered every inch of skin they could reach and his hands intertwined with mine above my head. No more words or apologies had to be exchanged. We let our bodies reconnect and made up for two weeks of stress and anger.

…rep…

Edward started talking to me more about his job after our fight. It was never anything overly specific, simply general comments about what he had done that day, or what he was having to deal with.

He thinks he has a mole in his ranks somewhere. He had a shipment, of what he didn't tell me, come in and a group of some of Volturi's men were there and tried to sabotage it.

His company is in the process of buying a weapons manufacturing plant on the east coast. It is supposedly the largest one in the country, but Edward is in the final stages of the negotiation process. He gets this mischievous glint in his eyes when he talks about it. It is equally sexy and terrifying.

I had been enjoying my newfound freedom. I didn't have any work to worry about, and I didn't have any deadlines or interviews to clog up my brain. I hadn't been on the internet in a month. It was an instant stress reliever.

Edward was already at work when I woke up. I went to the basement to work out, and turned on the television that was hanging in the corner. I kept it on for some background noise as I got on the treadmill, but the image of a familiar face halted me just a few minutes into my workout.

I quickly shut off the treadmill and grabbed the control to turn the volume up.

"The Chicago Police Department has confirmed a search for missing businessman Aro Volturi. Sources say Volturi's family first reported him missing three days ago, and the police have since started an investigation into his disappearance."

I turned off the television before they said anything else. I knew what would come next – the accusation that Edward was involved in it.

My mood was instantly crushed with anxiety. I felt like I should call or text Edward, but would that look suspicious? It was only ten in the morning and I already wanted to crawl back into bed.

 **Meet me for lunch at noon?**

Well, that was awfully convenient timing to receive a text from Edward.

 _I'll be there._

Ben and I got to the restaurant, one of Emmett's establishments, and I was immediately escorted to a table in the back. Edward, Emmett, and Jasper each had businesses all over the city, and the moment any family member walked in they were treated with the utmost respect and made their number one priority. I didn't even have to say anything to the hostess before she escorted me into the restaurant.

When it got past twelve fifteen I started to get uneasy. Edward was always on time. We met for lunch or dinner three or four times a week, and never once was he late. Never.

Just before I was about to call Edward to make sure everything was alright, a group of men in suits rushed into the restaurant, and headed straight for me. They were all familiar, I recognized several various bodyguards that had worked for Edward.

One of them, a man named Liam I think, handed something to Ben and whispered to him. All of the new men surrounded my table, cutting me off from the small crowd surrounding us in the restaurant.

"What's going on?" I asked, to no one in particular, just anyone who would answer.

Ben approached me and placed a hand on my shoulder as he leaned into my ear. "There's a situation, ma'am. This is from your husband." He handed me a folded piece of paper.

 _Bella, I just got word that the police have evidence that tie Emmett, Jasper, and myself to the Aro's disappearance. I'm so sorry to do this to you, baby, but I need to put you in charge of everything. With all of us locked up the next in line would normally be Liam, but I don't know who I can trust right now, except you. I've made all of the arrangements, no one will question your authority._

 _You just have to keep things running until I get out. Trust Ben and Eric, but no one else. No one, Bella._

 _I love you._

 _Edward_

I read the note five times over, expecting it to be different each time. Edward wouldn't leave me in charge. In charge of what, exactly? His business? The family business? _Everything?_

"Where is he?" I asked and four different men started to answer immediately. "Ben?"

"Your husband is currently being transferred to a CPD precinct where he will be questioned. We'll know more in a few hours."

"I – I don't understand." I held up the note like it was the answer to all of my problems.

"You're the head of the Cullen family and the interim CEO of E.C. Inc." Ben replied.

Fuck.

I was ushered into a waiting car and driven to Edward's office. It was just a few blocks away so it only took us a few minutes to get there. The second I got to his floor all eyes turned to me.

Jesus, all of these people expected me to have answers for them. I had no goddamn clue how to run a company. Absolutely no idea.

Jessica, Edward's secretary, approached me with a hand full of paperwork. "Mrs. Cullen, I have a few things that need your signature on them. There are some lease agreements regarding the property Mr. Cullen was purchasing out in Los Angeles, and we have some more documents from the plant in New York."

"Oh, uh, okay," I took the papers out of her hands and started walking toward Edward's office. Ben followed closely behind, and stood to the left of the door as I entered.

As I dropped the stack of papers onto his desk my phone rang. I didn't recognize the number, but I answered immediately.

"Hello?"

"Hey, baby."

"Fuck, Edward. What the hell are you thinking? I can't do this – "

"Yes, you can. I won't be here long. A few days tops. I just need you to keep things running smoothly. I trust you, Bella."

"How are you even calling me?"

"I get one phone call, you know."

"Shit, shouldn't you call a lawyer or – "

"My lawyer knows. He'll be here soon. Are you okay?"

"No. I have a stack of papers about shit I don't know anything about in front of me. I'm sitting in your office with no fucking clue what I'm doing."

"If you have any questions, ask Ben. He's more than just a bodyguard. He's been with us forever, he'll help you with anything you need."

Hearing how calm Edward sounded should have soothed me, but it just made me want to curl up in a corner and cry. "You'll be okay, right?" I asked, almost too afraid to know the answer.

"I'll be fine. I promise. I've got to go, but I'll be home soon. I love you, Bella."

"Love you," I whispered, but I was pretty sure the line had already gone dead.

…rep…

It had been a week, and Edward was still locked up somewhere. No one would let me see him. I called every day and every day the officers told me I was hindering their investigation and that they could give me no information at that time. Fuckers.

I've slept approximately five hours in the week since Edward got arrested, and spent ninety percent of my time locked in his office downtown. Edward had told me my main job was to just keep things running, but that was when he was only going to be locked up for a few days. It has been a week and, according to his lawyer, it could be a few more before he's out.

They have a lot of questions for him, apparently.

I spent a lot of time thinking about the note Edward sent me. Edward had mentioned that he had a mole somewhere in his ranks, and if I was the only one he trusted, that person had to have been pretty high up. Liam was a possibility, he had to be if Edward didn't leave the business to him when he was arrested.

There were so many other options, though; so many other people knew information about things that had been revealed to other organizations.

I spent a lot of my time talking to people. I talked to Liam and studied every movement he made around me. I talked to Mike, a man who worked mostly with dealers across the world and organized shipments to Chicago. He seemed too perfect. Every word he said seemed very calculated.

There were tens of Mike's in the Cullen organization though. Too many possibilities. I knew it was foolish to think I could figure out who the mole was when Edward, who had been doing this his entire life, hadn't yet. But I wanted to know, I needed to know.

What if they were framing Edward? I was fairly certain that he had nothing to do with Aro's disappearance. He would have told me, he would have let me know that I didn't have to worry about my biological father anymore if he knew he was no longer a threat.

I stood from Edward's desk and straightened my cream pencil skirt and made sure my black top was tucked in just right. I think I had been wearing this outfit for two days, but I didn't have time to go change. I grabbed my file and made my way to the conference room.

"Oh, Mrs. Cullen! I just got off the phone with Alice Cullen. She'd like you to call her when you have time." Jessica said as she followed me.

"I don't have time." I told her distractedly. Alice and Rosalie were both messes, but I didn't have time to console them. I didn't have time to console myself. They seemed to forget my husband had been arrested as well, and I also had to run the entire fucking family.

Charlie called me the day after Edward had been arrested. He shouted at me for an hour about how he knew Edward was a bad man but let it slide because he knew he had no power over me, especially now that I knew he wasn't my biological father. He didn't let his disappointment that I was now running one of the largest crime families in the country go unnoticed. He's tried to call me every day since then, but I never answered.

I entered the conference room where three men were already seated. One of them, Alexander Oliver, was the current owner of the weapons plant Edward had been in the process of buying. The other two were lawyers, one of his and one of mine. Well, Edward's.

"Gentlemen," I greeted them as I entered. They all stood politely and handshakes were exchanged as we all sat down.

"Mrs. Cullen, how are you?" Oliver asked. He seemed like a genuinely good man, as good a man as can be in this type of business. He was polite, but I knew not to trust him too much.

"As well as can be expected. Thank you for agreeing to continue the sale with me as opposed to my husband."

Pleasantries were over with and we got on to business. All that was really left was to sign on the dotted line, but we ran into some issues because the deal was in Edward's name. Thankfully Oliver was amenable to changing to deal to my name so we could be done with this.

I was about to purchase one of the largest weapons manufacturing plants in the country. The thought made me long for the days when my biggest worry was what I was going to wear to the People's Choice Awards.

An hour later the deal was done, and I was exhausted. I was walking past Jessica's desk, and Lauren, the receptionist, was sitting there talking with her.

"I hope she stays here. It's so much more pleasurable working for her than Mr. Cullen." Jessica whispered, unaware that I was within hearing distance.

I stopped in my tracks and look at her incredulously. "Speak about my husband like that again and you're fired. Get me some fucking coffee."

I slammed the office door behind me and hightailed it to the adjoining bathroom. My breathing started to come in pants and my head was spinning. I wet a washcloth and started patting it along my face and chest.

I couldn't handle much more of this.

I had a plan, though. I knew Edward would tell me not to do it, that it was the stupidest thing I could do in my position, but I didn't care.

I needed my husband back.

…rep…

Three days later and not much had changed except that I was in a new, clean, skirt and blouse. I rarely left the office because camped outside was a swarm of photographers. It didn't take long for the public to realize who was in charge now that the boys were behind bars.

I didn't have to look up any articles to know what they would be saying about me. At least there hadn't been any murders lately that I could be blamed for. I didn't think so, at least.

I didn't think I had done anything illegal yet. I met with some shady people, but that wasn't a crime, right? They were actually surprisingly kind, considering they could have completely screwed me over. They explained their situations and told me what Edward would likely do were he here. I guessed they could still be screwing me over, but I talked with Ben and Eric and they told me I was doing fine.

It was five when Ben reminded me of my meeting. I had to talk with a group of suppliers, and I was supposed to meet them at Edward's old penthouse in the city. The irony wasn't lost on me that this was probably a similar meeting he had been holding when I showed up after my disastrous birthday a few years ago.

I hated to admit that I enjoyed the meeting. It was like a giant puzzle that needed to be solved. An illegal puzzle, but still. When the meeting was over, I stood in the elevator surrounded by the suppliers and Ben and Eric.

"You're free to go once you drop me off at home. I'd like to be alone tonight." I whispered to Ben. I was tired of being surrounded, constantly. I was exhausted and needed a night alone to think.

"Mrs. Cullen, I don't think – "

"I want to be alone." I snapped.

He dropped the subject after that.

I felt instantly relaxed as I walked inside. I had hardly been here since my failed lunch with Edward. The relief was quickly tainted with longing. I wanted to walk upstairs and see Edward sitting in his office, or sleeping in our bed.

I had held myself together fairly well, I thought, considering the circumstances. But I needed tonight. I knew I couldn't keep it together much longer, and I needed to be able to breakdown in the comfort of my own home.

I ran the water in the bathtub and quickly got rid of my clothing. As soon as I was submerged I looked at the room around me and saw Edward everywhere. I saw him in the shower, his hands in my hair as he washed it for me. I saw him bent over the counter, carefully shaving before work. And I could almost feel him behind me, his strong arms wrapped around me and his lips at my neck.

My tears started to fall and I did nothing to stop them. I sat in the tub until the water became too cold to stand and got ready for bed. I pulled on a pair of Edward's boxers and the same Northwestern shirt I wore the first night I spent with him so long ago.

Sleep never came. I curled up in the middle of our bed, that was losing Edward's scent more and more every day, and sobbed. I was crying so loud I never even heard the footsteps I knew I should have as they came up the stairs.

I didn't know he was in the room until he said my name.

"Isabella."

My skin broke out in goose bumps and I froze for a few seconds before my head popped up to see Aro Volturi standing in the doorway.

He was on top of me before I could scramble off of the bed, his hands wrapped around my throat.

I grasped at his hands and tried to loosen his hold, but he was surprisingly strong.

"You ruined everything." He grunted out at me. "I could have gotten that old fool to hand over everything he had. I knew I should've gotten rid of you when you were a child."

My vision was starting to blur but I managed to get my own hands to his face and scratched everywhere I could reach. I felt one of my fingers hit is eye socket and it shocked him just enough for me to slip out of his hold.

I ran out of the room and was able to lock myself in Edward's office before he got to me. He may be stronger, but I was faster.

Rushing over to his desk, I tossed everything out of the drawers. I knew he would have something in here. I reached under the center of the desk and my hands found the handle of a glock.

Aro was pounding on the door, and eventually shot through the lock. I ducked behind the desk and looked at the weapon in my hands. All of Edward's lessons over the last year and a half flashed through my head. _Safety off. Finger off of the trigger until you're ready to shoot. If you're in danger, shoot to kill_.

I went over the lessons in my head for too long and Aro found me crouched behind Edward's desk. He pulled me up by my hair, and tugged my head back so I was forced to look at him.

He roughly pulled the gun out of my hands and tossed it behind me. "I was going to bring some colleagues with me tonight. Let them have their way with you before I got rid of you, I knew your husband would love that. But I decided I wanted you all to myself. I wanted to see the life leave your eyes on my own."

He pushed me down and my head hit the corner of the desk. It made my head fuzzy, but I knew I couldn't let myself pass out. I could see the gun a few feet away from me, but knew I needed to be smart about the timing before I went for it.

"I didn't do anything to you, I never asked for anything. I don't want anything from you now that I know who you are. I won't tell anyone, I promise. Just _please_ leave me alone." I cried out. I started slowly backing up on the ground when he started walking toward me.

"It's too late for that, child. I would make it quick if you would stop fighting me." He sneered as he stalked toward me. He raised his gun the second my right hand felt the metal of the gun behind me.

I gripped my hand around the handle, my finger ready on the trigger. I was shooting before he knew I had the gun in my hand, and it was only second later he had four bullets in his chest.

Aro fell to the ground and I backed up quickly so I wasn't stuck under him. I stared at him for a few seconds, my mind taking too long to process everything that was happening around me.

I kicked his gun away from him, just in case. On shaky legs I stumbled through the office and grabbed Edward's desk phone.

Ben answered on the first ring.

"I need help."

 **A/N: Oh boy. Stay with me, folks.**

 **There are some legal things in the next few chapters. I'm going to try and be as accurate as possible, but I'm sure I'll get some things flat out wrong. It is fiction, after all. Just bear with me!**


	11. Getaway Car

_X marks the spot where we fell apart. He poisoned the well, every man for himself. I knew it from the first Old Fashioned we were cursed. It hit you like a shotgun shot to the heart. You were drivin' the getaway car, we were flyin', but we'd never get far. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **Getaway Car**_

…rep…

I heard the door swing open downstairs, and his quick footsteps as he ran up to me. My eyes met his in the doorway as he took in the scene before him.

I stood in the office, my gun pointed at Aro's lifeless body in front of me. Blood trickled down my face, but I didn't know where it was coming from. My whole body was shaking but I was frozen in place at the same time.

Ben knelt down next to Aro and placed two fingers on his neck. He nodded to himself then approached me slowly. "Bella, give me the gun." He held out his hand. "He's dead. You're okay. Give me the gun."

I flicked the safety switch and dropped it into his hands. The second the heavy metal was out of my grip my legs gave out from under me. Ben caught me and helped me stumble downstairs.

Eric was there and he took me from Ben's arms. He set me down in a chair at the dining room table and wrapped a blanket around my arms. He didn't leave my side.

I saw red and blue flashing lights outside after a few minutes. Officers rushed in and Ben directed them to Edward's office. They were up there for a while, or maybe it was only a few minutes. My brain was too fuzzy.

I pulled the blanket tighter around me and rested my head against my knees. My mind was spinning and there were too many noises around me.

A gentle hand rested on my shoulder and I flinched violently. I looked up into the eyes of a female police officer. "Mrs. Cullen, can you come with me? We have some questions for you." She was polite, but I knew not to trust it.

I was Edward Cullen's wife. Police were never going to be nice to me unless they wanted something from me. But, I looked up at Eric and he nodded slightly. It must be a normal question to ask, so I nodded at the officer and followed her.

"I will drive her. Which precinct?" Eric asked, a strong hand on my shoulder to keep me from following her any farther.

Eric escorted me to one of our SUV's and helped me in. I didn't bother changing out of what I was wearing, I didn't have the energy to go upstairs and walk past Edward's office.

 _Edward_! Aro was alive and free. He got to me, so Edward had nothing to do with his supposed disappearance. He couldn't have, he's been locked up with no communication outside. He should be released, this should be enough evidence to clear him of any crime.

"They're already breaking protocol." Eric said as soon as we were driving away from the flashing lights behind us.

"What?"

"They should have sent you to a hospital. Your forehead is bleeding and you're about to have a nasty shiner on your right eye. They're hoping to trick you into something, I'm sure of it. Don't say a word to anyone when we get to the precinct."

"Oh… okay."

…rep…

I was sitting in a cold, metal chair next to Detective Clearwater's desk. I was ushered into the building quickly, but they've had me sitting here for an hour at least. I was cold and tired and I wanted to go home. No, I wanted to go to the penthouse. It was closer and wasn't filled with police at the moment.

Eric stood next to me, ever vigilant. The police department around us was chaos. People were shouting at each other, and I got many cold glares, as if the commotion was all my fault.

Then I heard it. A voice I would recognize anywhere.

"She's not answering any of your questions. She's the fucking victim! I'm taking her home, you can't hold her here. I'll bring her back later for her statement." Edward shouted. His voice was close. I turned around and looked toward the front desk and there he was.

His hair was an even bigger mess than usual. He was in a casual t-shirt and I could see his muscles of his arms flex as he tried his best to remain calm. All I wanted was for those arms to be wrapped around me.

Without thinking about it, I hopped up from my chair and ran. I bumped into people left and right, but I didn't care because my eyes were locked on Edward. He saw me coming and was able to take a few steps closer to me before I jumped at him. His arms wrapped around me and I was finally safe.

The moment I had my head buried in his neck my sobs started. My body started shaking and if it weren't for Edward's arms holding me up I would have fallen to the ground.

"It's okay, I've got you. You're safe now." He murmured over and over again. His hands rubbed my back but all it did was make me sob harder.

Edward pulled my head from his shoulder and looked at me. I could see his expression darken as he saw the mess covering my face. I hadn't actually looked in a mirror, but I knew I looked just as shitty as I felt.

"Jesus Christ," he grumbled. He set me carefully on my feet, and pushed me behind him. Jasper, whom I didn't realize was next to Edward, put a steadying arm on my back and Emmett a calming hand on my shoulder.

"It isn't protocol to take the goddamn victim straight in for questioning when she's got a fucking gash in her head! She doesn't even have shoes on!" I looked down at my feet and sure enough, he was right. I wasn't wearing any shoes. "You'll be lucky if I don't sue this entire fucking department." Edward grabbed a few things off of the counter and then wrapped me up in his arms again.

Edward, Emmett, and Jasper formed a sort of circle around me as we left. Edward helped me into the back seat of an SUV, and Emmett and Jasper got in the front. He held me in the back as I cried, unwilling to let go of him for a second.

Edward carried me bridal style into a building. I looked around for a second and saw we were at his penthouse. I sighed into his neck and let my eyes drift closed.

"You can't sleep yet, baby, I'm sorry. There's a doctor here to look over you." Edward whispered to me.

When we got inside Edward set me on the couch. He pulled another blanket around my shoulders. I looked down and realized I was still in his t-shirt and boxers. I couldn't find it in myself to be embarrassed though.

Edward froze as he was wrapping the blanket around me. I looked at him and saw his eyes were locked on the shirt. It was light grey, so the bright flecks of red blood stood out clearly.

"It's not mine." I choked out.

Edward nodded and wrapped me up. Another man walked over then and kneeled in front of me.

"Mrs. Cullen, can you tell me how you got this?" he pointed to my forehead. He had a bag next to him and started pulling things out and cleaning up my wound.

"Um, the desk I think."

"Ah," his hands were gentle as he placed a bandage over the wound. "You'll likely have a black eye. I don't' think we need to worry about a concussion, though." He told me. His fingers gently poked and prodded around my head. I hissed as his hands reached my neck. He looked at me questioningly.

"He, um, had his hands around my neck." I whispered. I heard a mumbled "Fuck," next to me from Edward.

"Well, we can expect some bruising here as well. Is there anything else on you that hurts?"

I stretched my body out, but nothing drastic seemed wrong. I was sore all over, but I thought that was to be expected. "No, I don't think so."

"I'll be back in a few days to look at your head again. Mr. Cullen has my number in case you need anything. Don't hesitate to call."

I nodded at him and then he was gone. Edward took his place, kneeling in front of me. "Let's get you cleaned up, okay?" I nodded again and Edward took me back in his arms.

As he was carrying me toward the stairs I heard the elevator ding. I looked over and saw Emmett and Jasper getting in. I wondered if Alice and Rosalie knew what happened, or that their husbands were free.

Edward set me down once we were in the ensuite. He let the blanket fall from my shoulders and quickly got rid of my messy clothes. He turned on the shower and followed me into it, still fully dressed. I flinched at the warm water at first, but eventually relaxed into the spray.

"Careful," Edward warned, covering up the patch on my forehead. He washed my body with careful, soft hands. He had to scrub some parts of my arms, because there was blood caked onto my skin. The water flowed around us with a tinge of red staining it.

Edward's fingers massaged my scalp lightly and I rested my forehead on his chest. I was so tired I couldn't keep my head up on my own.

"I want to go to sleep," I told him.

"I know, Bella. Just a few more minutes."

Once he rinsed out my hair he shut off the water and led me to our closet, wrapped in a towel. Edward stood next to me, soaking head to toe, and carefully lifted my arms so he could put one of his t-shirts around me.

Edward got me comfortable in bed, but then turned to leave. "Don't go."

He kneeled next to me and tucked some of my hair behind my ear. "I just need to change. I'll be back in two minutes, okay?"

I nodded but didn't take my eyes off of him. I watched him in the bathroom as he brushed his hair, all wet and knotted from the shower. I watched his shadow as he moved around in the closet, and followed him with my eyes as he came back over to bed.

I got myself as close as humanly possible to Edward once he was lying next to me. "You'll be here when I wake up?" I asked.

"Yes, I promise." His arms tightened around me and I fell into the first peaceful sleep I've had in weeks.

The peacefulness didn't last long though, because I woke up not long after that screaming. In my mind I was back in our bed at the house with Aro's hands back around my neck. I pushed the hands wrapped around me away as hard as I could, but they wrapped around my wrists and held me in place.

"It's okay! You're safe, Bella. I'm here, you're safe." Edward repeated to me, his voice breaking through the residual images from my nightmare that were clogging up my brain.

"I was in bed and I just – I didn't hear him come in at all. He was just suddenly there and his hands were around my neck. I got away though, somehow, and got to your office. You had a gun there and I remembered everything you told me. _Safety off. Finger off of the trigger until you're ready to shoot. If you're in danger, shoot to kill_." I took a deep breath before I continued. "But he got to me again and threw me on the ground and tossed the gun away. I hit my head on the desk when I fell. I was backing up toward the gun while he was saying… horrible things. He pointed his gun at me but somehow, I got to him first. I – I killed him."

I started sobbing again, but I didn't know where the tears were coming from. I would have thought I had none left after everything that's happened the last twenty-four hours.

Edward held me to his chest, his arms crushing me to him. "Do not feel guilt over killing him. It was you or him in that moment. He is at fault here, Bella, not you."

"I killed someone," I breathed out. I wasn't upset that Aro Volturi was gone. It made no difference to me if he were dead or alive, but I couldn't get the sight of his dead body out of my mind. I took someone from this earth by my own hand, and I couldn't get rid of this knot of guilt from my chest.

"Don't think of it that way. You saved yourself."

…rep…

The next time I woke was much more pleasant. I was alone in bed, but the bathroom door was open and I could hear Edward in the shower. I didn't like the distance, so I got up and joined him.

I kept my head away from the water and wrapped my arms around Edward's waist as he rinsed his hair. "Hi." I whispered.

"Hi."

"How do you feel?"

I could see him staring at my neck, and I knew there were probably grotesque bruises wrapped around it. "Still tired, mostly."

Edward nodded and started carefully washing me, just like he did last night.

I had a question I needed to ask, but it was also an answer I was afraid to know. "You're… back for good, right? They're not going to take you in again?"

Edward nodded. He gently traced my cheek that wasn't bruised. "Yes, I'm here for good."

"Good. Because I – " my eyes started to water and I couldn't hold the tears back now. "I can't handle you leaving like that again." I wrapped my arms around him and clung to him like I was drowning. I needed him, now more than ever.

He shut the shower off and carried me out. I was wrapped up in sheets and Edward's arms before I knew it.

"I'm sorry," Edward confessed. "I'm sorry I left you in charge, I had no other choice. I'm sorry he got to you and I wasn't there to protect you." He looked so sad, the brokenness in his eyes echoed my own.

"You're here now. That's what matters."

We slept for a while longer. Well, I slept, I was pretty sure Edward just stared at me the whole time. I didn't mind though, I felt very protected with him next to me. It was late that afternoon that Edward got a call from the police department. They wanted me to come in and make an official statement about what happened.

"We can put it off." Edward shrugged off the call. He was in no hurry to give the police what they wanted.

"I'd rather just get it over with and never have to think about it again."

Edward nodded. "I'll call Jenks and have him meet us there in a few hours."

"Jenks?"

"The family lawyer."

…rep…

They took me to an interrogation room. I always assumed cop shows had to be wrong about the small room with the double-sided mirror on the wall for others to look in, I didn't think those actually existed.

But they did, I was in one I sat in another cold, metal chair across from Detective Clearwater. He seemed like a nice man, professional. I didn't get the feeling that he held any prejudice against me because of my last name.

Jenks, Edward's lawyer, sat next to me. I talked to him for a while before we got here. I had to tell him what happened, and he told me there was no reason I couldn't tell the truth about all of it. It was slightly unnerving hearing him say that, like he had advised people to lie to the police in the past.

I have been 'advised' not to say anything about Aro being my biological father. According to Edward, the police have no real connection between the two of us, other than Edward's business dealings with him. He said that was good, it placed all of the motive on him.

"Okay, Mrs. Cullen, let's start with what you did right when you got home that night."

"My bodyguard dropped me off at home. I told him I didn't want him around that night, I just wanted to be alone."

"Why did you want to be alone?"

"Because I was stressed and tired and scared." I shook my head, that didn't sound right. "Not scared for my safety. I was scared because my husband was locked up somewhere and I hadn't seen him in weeks."

"Okay. And what had you so stressed?"

I frowned at that. These weren't the kind of questions I expected them to ask me. "I had become interim CEO of my husband's company. It's a stressful job."

Clearwater nodded. "Okay, and what did you do when you got home?"

"I took a bath. I just sat in there for a while, the water was icy by the time I got out." I got another nod, so I continued. "Then I got dressed and got into bed. The next thing I know Aro Volturi is staring at me and his hands are wrapped around my neck." My voice cracked and I wished Edward could be sitting next to me instead of Jenks. I did know he weaseled himself into the viewing room behind the window, though, after he threatened to sue the department again.

"You didn't hear him come in?"

"No. I was crying in bed." I admitted.

"Your home has an extensive security system. Did you not set the alarm before you went to bed?"

Shit. I didn't. Edward usually did that every night. I faltered for a second before I responded to him. "I guess not. My husband usually did it and I just forgot."

"That's a big oversight. You're a public figure, leaving your house unprotected like that is dangerous."

"I know." I snapped. I had the marks around my neck to prove just how dangerous it was. "I scratched his face, I think I hurt his eye and then I got out and ran to Edward's office. I knew he had a gun in there, for protection."

Thankfully, the weapon Edward had in his office was fully registered and he had a license for it, so I had no problem admitting where I had gotten it from.

"He shot through the lock and found me behind the desk. He pulled me up and threw me on the ground. I hit the desk, that's how I got these," I motioned to the growing black eye and bandage on my forehead.

"Did he say anything to you while this was happening?"

I couldn't tell them about the threats he made about me being his child, but I could tell them one thing he said. I knew Edward wouldn't like hearing it though. "In the office he said something…" I tried to remember his exact words, and just the thought of them made me nauseous. "Something along the line of how he was going to bring colleagues with him that night. He said he was going to let them, um, _have_ me before he killed me."

I jumped at the sound of a large crash somewhere behind me. Edward was surely responsible for it.

"So, he threatened you?"

"Yes. He said he wanted to see the life leave my eyes on his own."

"Then you shot him?"

I nodded. "I started scooting back, getting closer to the gun he threw aside. I told him I never did anything to him, begged him to leave. Then he pointed his gun at me, but I was faster."

"Four shots to the chest is quite impressive."

I frowned at that. "My father is a police officer and my husband also taught me how to shoot."

The detective looked at his notes for a few moments. "Thank you for your time, Mrs. Cullen. We'll call if we have any more questions."

I nodded and stood immediately. Jenks put a hand on my back and led me out of the room. Edward met us right outside and brought me into his chest right when he saw me.

"Who knew Edward Cullen had a heart?" The detective grumbled behind us.

"Fuck off, Clearwater." Edward grumbled and pulled me away.

We went out the back entrance to the precinct because outside was a swarm of photographers. Word had gotten out about what happened and it seemed every photographer from around the country was now out to get a picture of me, post-attack.

It was bad enough having the police photographer taking pictures of all of my bruises earlier today.

But it was all over with now. I wouldn't need to come back in. I wouldn't need to think about it anymore.

I could tell Edward had more questions for me about it, but he was holding them in. We were on our way to his office. I didn't want to mope around at home any more, and he wanted to see how big of a mess I had made of his company since he had been gone.

I had used the term mess, Edward just wanted to see how things were going, and I needed the distraction.

When we reached his floor Jessica rushed at us, stacks of papers in her arms. "Mrs. Cullen, we have a lot of things for you this morning. These agreements need to be – Oh. Um." She looked at Edward standing next to me, then back at me.

"I don't want those." I said bluntly. It made Edward laugh, which made me smile.

Jessica blubbered on about various things but I could thankfully ignore her. That was no longer my responsibility.

"Everything can wait until next week. I'm just here to check on a few things." Edward brushed past her and led me into his office. I took a seat in the chair opposite of the desk, but Edward dragged me, and the chair, on the other side next to him.

"So, tell me what you did." Edward said, logging on to his computer.

"Oh, um, not much really. Just day to day stuff Jessica kept throwing at me. I almost fired her yesterday when she said you were hard to work for."

Edward smirked at me. "I am hard to work for."

"I know, but I didn't feel like listening to her talk about it."

…rep…

The next few days were odd. I kept feeling like there was another shoe to drop, that there was something else waiting for us around the corner. Edward told me I was paranoid, and I was starting to believe him.

Edward and I kept to ourselves for the most part. We spent most of our days in the penthouse adjusting. Him to finally being out of police custody and me to… everything.

I felt different. I couldn't say exactly what felt different or how, I was just different. After my talk with Edward the night I woke up screaming I had no guilt over Aro Volturi's death. I did what I needed to do. I saved myself. I shouldn't feel guilt over that.

Edward and I were making out on the couch. It the most intimate we had gotten since the whole ordeal. I still had nasty bruises on my neck and my eye, but I wasn't as sore anymore. Edward had been extremely careful with me since the attack, but now I wanted more.

Before we could take it any further the elevator dinged, signaling someone's arrival.

"Fuck," I muttered. I squeezed him closer to me for just another second, while I still could.

Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie, and Alice wandered in, their arms full of food and decorations.

"What are you doing here?" Edward grunted. I moved to get off of his lap, but he dug his fingers into my hips to keep me in place. Maybe it was to cover his growing erection, or maybe it was because he just didn't want me to move. Both were strong possibilities.

"We thought you two could use some fun. We've got games and food!"

Despite Edward's grumbles early on, we had a good night. We at food and talked about inconsequential things. No serious topics were brought up, for which I was thankful. It was nice to have a night without fears or worries.

Eventually we all ended up in a circle in the living room. Edward was sitting on the couch next to me, his feet propped up on the table. I laid with my head in his lap while his fingers gently tugged through my hair. Emmett and Rose took up one of the armchairs, and Alice sat cuddled up next to Jasper on the floor.

"Hmmm… best sex of your life?" Alice asked. After spending more time with Alice and Rose, I discovered the whole family was quite open about their sex lives. That's why all of Alice's questions at my bachelorette party were sex related. It was just how they were.

"Oh, the boat! Remember the boat, Rosie?" Emmett shouted. Rosalie nodded enthusiastically. Alice and Jasper both agreed that the night Jasper proposed to her won out for them.

Then all eyes were on Edward and I. I rolled on to my back and looked up at Edward. "I have two."

"What are yours?"  
I held up one finger. "Your office." That got me a cocky smirk. I held up another finger. "Wedding night."

"Hmmm. Both good options." Edward nodded.

This was what I needed. I needed family and friends and inane talk about unimportant topics. Soon I would feel normal again. Soon.

…rep…

A week later, things were starting to get back to normal. We were still at the penthouse. I didn't think I could handle being at home again just yet. Edward had gone back to work, but never stayed at his office for more than a few hours. He worked from home mostly, so I wasn't alone. I had become a bit of a hermit, but I kept telling myself I just needed time.

Edward was at his office now, but he had been there nearly the whole day. He told me he might get stuck a little later, but I didn't think that meant all day.

I went up to our room to read. I pulled a random book off of the shelf but it didn't hold my attention very long. I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew Edward was shaking me awake.

"Bella, I need you to wake up, baby. We need to go." Edward's voice was quiet but rushed. I looked over at the clock and was surprised to see it was nearly midnight already. Did he just get home?  
"Go where?"

"I'll explain in the car. I packed some things for you, come on."

I sighed, but got out of bed. I was still in my stretch pants and tank top from this afternoon, so they would have to do for whatever this outing was for. I doubted I needed to look much better for wherever we were going at midnight.

Edward practically dragged me down to the parking lot. I sighed as he ran around the car to get to the driver's seat. "Want to tell me what this is about, now?"

He got the car going just as screeching tires sounded around us. I looked around and saw Emmett's jeep barreling toward us. Edward pulled out before Emmett could block him in, forcing Emmett to swerve and hit a few of the parked cars on the other side.

Emmett jumped out of his car and screamed something, I couldn't hear what it was though. He pounded on the car a few times before Edward sped away.

"What the hell is going on?" I asked as I stared at Emmett getting smaller and smaller behind us.

Edward's hands gripped the steering wheel so tight I thought it was going to snap in half. "They think you planned it."

"What?"

"The police. They've been building a case against you. They're about to charge you with conspiracy to commit manslaughter and first-degree murder."

All of the air left my lungs. My entire body went numb. "About to charge me?"

"They're issuing a warrant for your arrest. They'll have it within the hour."

"H-how do you know this?"

"Do you remember Detective Clearwater?"

"Yes."

"He works for us."

"He works for you? Edward, this makes no sense!"

Edward slammed his hands on the wheel. "They will do anything to take down a Cullen, including you. They're pissed they didn't get any charges to stick on us and now they're going after you."

My heart, which had seemed frozen since we got in the car, started to beat in overtime. "So, where are we going then?" My voice was embarrassingly high-pitched. I didn't have time to worry about that now, though.

"Anywhere. I'm not letting them take you away from me."

…rep…

We didn't talk much. Edward drove through the night, and I sat in the passenger seat and stared out the window. I had no clue where he was taking us, I just watched as the white stripes on the road passed us by.

Edward stopped in a small town about five hours away. He went in to a small motel and got us a room. It was a seedy place where you paid by the hour. It wasn't Edward's usual hotel of choice, but I knew why we couldn't stay there.

Once we were checked in Edward ushered me into the room before he went back out to get some of the bags he packed for us. I looked around the room, and it was surprisingly clean. It smelled fresh and the bed didn't look as disgustingly used as I imagined it would. I sat on the edge of the bed and looked around.

Is this what our lives would be like from now on? Seedy motel rooms and constantly needing to look over our shoulders?

Edward came back in and quietly closed the door behind him. "We'll rest here for a few hours." He said, taking a seat next to me on the bed. He grabbed my hand and gave it a squeeze. "Don't worry. I'll take care of everything."  
The bubble of anxiety and fear that had steadily been building in my chest exploded and I just needed something, anything, to ground me. I dropped his hand and straddled his waist. I could see the shock on his face, but didn't pay it any mind as I kissed him with everything I had.

I pulled his shirt over his head roughly and that was when Edward pulled away, holding my face in his hands so I couldn't continue my attack.

"We should talk." He told me, but his voice was gruff and I knew what he really wanted.

"We're fucking fugitives. There's nothing to talk about." I pushed him down on the bed and covered his upper body with my own. I needed skin on skin, and I needed it now. I threw my shirt across the room and kissed my way down his chest.

Something snapped in Edward. He let out an odd groan and flipped me onto my back. He stood at the foot of the bed and made quick work with the rest of my clothing.

I scooted back up on the bed as he got rid of his pants and moaned as soon as we were skin to skin. His lips met mine in a demanding kiss with his tongue invading my mouth and sliding along my own in the harshest way. I reveled in it, though.

Despite the rough kiss and his wandering hands, he steered clear of my neck, which still had a lightening bruise. His hands traveled along every inch of skin he could reach while his lips tormented my breasts in the best way possible. He kissed his way down my stomach and up my legs, then lifted my legs on his shoulders to place a surprisingly delicate kiss to my center.

"No. Inside." I didn't need foreplay. I needed him.

Edward dropped my legs from his shoulders and flipped me on my stomach. He molded my body into the position he wanted, and I did as I was instructed. Bent at my waist. Hands clutching the wooden headboard. Legs spread.

His hands trailed along the skin of my back, leaving tingles in their wake. The sensation made me arch my back and I could just picture his smirk behind me. I could feel him pressed into my thigh.

" _Please_."

He was inside of me in one, even stroke. He bent his body over mine and his hands covered mine on the headboard. Edward rested his head against mine, his lips at my ear as he pounded into me.

"You're mine." He grunted. "I'll do anything for you."

I moaned, too loudly for when we weren't in the privacy of our own home, but Edward didn't mind. "Louder. I want to hear you scream." He accentuated each of his words with thrusts harder than the last.

My fingers dug into the headboard and Edward's squeezed mine as tightly as he could. His breath huffed right next to my ear with each thrust. Screams and groans echoed throughout the room, but I couldn't find it in me to be embarrassed.

"Edward," I moaned, dropping my head to my chest as his thrusts got more erratic. My toes curled and my entire body tensed as my orgasm rushed through me, bringing Edward along with me.

My upper body collapsed into the bed, and the rest of me followed when Edward pulled out and situated me into a more comfortable position. I gave him a few minutes to catch his breath before I hooked a leg around his waist and pulled him on top of me.

" _More_."

…rep…

I expected the wave of disappointment that washed over the when Edward finally passed out next to me, exhaustion taking over. I was just as tired, but I couldn't sleep. I let myself lie there and look at him for a while. I traced his features, always so relaxed as he slept. His lips were a little red and swollen from our night together, and it made me smile. I ran my fingers lightly along his face.

The sun was already up, and I knew Edward said he only wanted to stay here for a few hours. I had to hurry.

I cried as I slipped out from underneath his arms, and I cried as I pulled on some clothing from the bag he packed for us. My hands shook as I fished his keys out from the pocket of his discarded jeans. I had to take a deep breath before I leaned over him and kissed his lips lightly, one more time.

"I love you," I whispered, even though I knew he was fast asleep. I just had to say it.

My legs were shaky as I left the room and I almost tripped down the stairs as I walked to the car. It felt like I was walking through water with every step I took. My legs were heavy and didn't want to do what I was forcing them to.

Tears blurred my vision by the time I was at the car. My hands were shaking so badly I dropped the keys as I tried to put them in the ignition. I fumbled around to find them on the ground. The passenger door popped open, but before I could scream I saw Edward sitting there, clad in only a pair of boxers.

My silent tears turned to sobs as I looked at him. "I can't, Edward. I can't run for the rest of my life, and I can't have you do the same."

For the first time in the years I've known him, I saw tears fill Edward's emerald eyes. "They'll tear you apart, do whatever they can to get their charges to stick."

"I know. But I didn't –"

"I know you didn't. They probably know you didn't, too. They just want to take us down."

"There are systems in place, though. To make sure innocent people don't get blamed for other prejudices." I argued weakly.

"There are. But, a lot of innocent people are rotting away in prison right now."

I flinched at his words. "I know."

Edward was silent for a few minutes before he spoke again. "If you want to do this, I won't stop until the charges are dropped and you're home with me again. It's your decision."

I looked out the windshield at the bright sun and clear blue sky. The day looked promising, but it was like mother nature was rubbing it in my face. "We can't run forever. It'll be hard now, but at least we would know our fate."

Edward reached over and grabbed the keys out of my hand. "I need to change and grab our bag. Don't go anywhere."

He was only gone for a minute or two. Then he lifted me out of the driver's seat and situated me in the passenger side.

Edward held my hand for the entire drive. His thumb rubbed soothing circles as my sobs filled the car. He didn't say anything though. There was nothing to be said.

 **A/N: Hang in there. More bumpy times ahead, but I will tell you this: I don't read a twilight fanfic without knowing there's a HEA. We'll get there, trust me. Next chapter is about half way done - I'll get it up as soon as possible!  
**

 **As I said before, please bear with me on some of the legal stuff discussed in here as we proceed. I'm sure some of the situations are improbable or impossible, but this is fiction.**

 **I'm also thinking about doing a little outtake in Edward's POV of some important parts of this story. Is that something you all would want? If so, let me know any specific parts you'd like!**


	12. I Did Something Bad

_I never trust a narcissist, but they love me. So, I play 'em like a violin, and I make it look oh-so-easy. 'Cause for every lie I tell them, they tell me three. This is how the world works, now all he thinks about is me. I can feel the flames on my skin, crimson red paint on my lips. If a man talks shit, then I owe him nothing. I don't regret it one bit, 'cause he had it coming. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **I Did Something Bad**_

…rep…

Edward made a few calls during our drive back to the city. He talked with Jenks about a peaceful surrender. I didn't know the exact details of it, but it was pretty easy to guess what it meant. I rolled my window down to let the wind in. I stuck my hand out of the window and enjoyed the sunshine.

I didn't know how much sunshine I would see after this afternoon.

When the Chicago skyline came into view Edward pulled the car over. I looked over at him, confused about why he would stop on the side of the highway.

"I have to… I need you to know that you're the most extraordinary woman I've ever known. You're brave and strong and such a fucking fighter. I love you, and I promise I will not let you get stuck there for the rest of your life."

I gave him a weak smile. It was the best I could do at the moment. I wanted to tell him I knew he wouldn't let me rot in prison, but I knew there were some things even Edward Cullen couldn't control. "I love you."

"Everything will be okay." He said, but I had a feeling he was saying it more to himself than me.

He pulled back onto the highway and it was just a few minutes later that we were approaching the same police precinct where I gave my statement a few weeks ago. As we approached Edward started talking again, his voice much more serious this time.

"They'll keep you in the jail in this precinct. If anything happens, if you're ever in any kind of danger, find Detective Clearwater. He'll protect you. Jenks is already in there, never talk to anyone without him present. Not the guard that they'll keep outside your cell, or even another civilian."

"Will… will I be able to see you?"

"I'll make sure of it." His voice was so strong and sure I had no choice but to believe him.

Edward parallel parked on the street in front of the precinct. Officers surrounded the area, thankfully keeping back a few of the photographers that were standing in the street.

I looked down at my hand, still in Edward's, and saw the familiar sparkle of my wedding rings. I pulled my hand out of his and slowly slid the rings off of my finger and held them out to him. "Keep these safe for me?"

I dropped them in Edward's hand. He leaned across the console and ran his fingers through my hair, resting his hand at the back of my neck. "I will love you until the day I die, Isabella Cullen." He whispered to me before placing the softest of kisses on my lips.

I tried to respond, but my voice failed me. Edward nodded. He knew.

He got out of the car and calmly walked over to my side. He held his hand out for me, and I took it gratefully. I squeezed his hand and he pulled me out of the car. His arms wrapped around me and he tucked me into his chest, so no one would be able to see my face in any of the pictures.

My footsteps faltered as we entered the building. Edward had to practically push me through the door.

When the door was closed securely behind us two people approached. I recognized Detective Clearwater but I didn't know who the other man was. He looked at me with a sneer and I knew he already hated me, already assumed I was guilty.

Clearwater reached out and gently grabbed my arm, but I panicked. "Wait! Wait! Please, just wait a second." Clearwater nodded and the man next to him rolled his eyes at me.

I turned and wrapped my arms around Edward's neck, pulling him as close to me as I could. With my lips next to his ear I whispered, "I love you. Forever."

Edward hugged me close for a few moments, but eventually he started to push me away. My fingers dug into his shoulder, never wanting to let go. He pressed a soft kiss to my forehead. "It'll be okay. I promise."

The second Edward's hands left me harsh ones pulled both of my arms behind my back and snapped handcuffs around them, making me wince.

"Careful," Edward demanded, his eyes narrowed on the unnamed officer that was with Clearwater.

"Calm down, Cullen. I'll take excellent care of her for you," the man chortled. He traced a finger down my cheek and I flinched away.

I looked over at Edward and he looked murderous. Emmett and Jasper walked in then, thankfully, and grabbed Edward before he could attack the man. They both looked at me with sad eyes, and gave me a small nod.

"Isabella Cullen, you have the right to remain silent…" Clearwater started reading me off my rights and pulled me further into the building. I trusted him to lead me and turned my head to look at Edward for as long as I could before he disappeared from my sight.

"Sorry about the cuffs. Riley just wanted a rise out of Cullen." Clearwater told me, quickly releasing my hands. "I'm Seth. If you have any problems with Riley, let me know, okay?" His words were simple, but I understood their true meaning now that I knew he worked for Edward.

I nodded, rubbing my wrists. I only had the cuffs on for a minute or two, but it just felt too unnatural.

"Where is everyone? Last time I was here it was a mad house." I asked. Seth was sitting at a computer typing something up. I sat in the same chair I was in when they brought me here after the incident.

"We got rid of anyone non-essential for the day. This case has become the priority for the department."

"Making a new friend, Clearwater?" Riley sauntered over. He pulled a chair up in front of me and sat in it backwards, his arms resting over the back. "So, this is the infamous Bella Cullen."

"Isabella." I corrected him. I didn't like him seeming so familiar with me. I already hated him with a passion.

"Ah, feisty." He gave me a disgusting smirk and then looked over at Seth. "Book her and then bring her to interrogation room B. I'll see you soon, _Isabella_."

When Riley was gone I relaxed into my chair a little bit. I knew I would have to be on guard whenever he was around.

"Don't trust a single thing he says. He's been out for a Cullen for years, he'll do anything to convict you." Seth told me and handed me a little black board with my name on it, and a few other things about my arrest. "Can you stand there for me?" He pointed to a plain white wall, and I got up and stood with my back to it.

I turned this way and that as they took my mug shot, and I knew it would only be a matter of time until they were on TMZ and every tabloid cover across the country.

Once he had that shot he picked up a more portable camera. "I need pictures of all of your tattoos." He told me. I held my arms out for him and pointed to each one. I lifted my shirt for the one on my side, and had to pull my jeans down a bit for the one on my hip. Edward's tattoo.

"Okay, come with me." Seth led me to another room in the back. It was small, and there were stacks of blue uniforms piled high against one of the walls. "I trust you don't have anything on you? Weapon, drugs, phone…?"

"Um, no. Just earrings." I reached up and pulled the studs out of my ears. Edward got them for me a week after our wedding. I dropped them in Seth's hand. "Can you get them to Edward?" I didn't like the thought of them just sitting in a bag for who knows how long. They were too important. I should've given them to Edward when I gave him my ring.

"Of course. If anyone asks, I did a full pat down and, uh, cavity search. You'll need to change into these," He handed me a pair of what looked like dark blue hospital scrubs. He turned around and let me change.

Seth got my fingerprints next, which left my hands stained blue. "Riley is the head detective on the case, and he's requested to question you alone. Your lawyer should be in there, so you won't be alone." He told me as he walked me across the precinct. There were a few more officers scattered around, and I got glares from every one of them.

Seth opened a door for me, and I was ushered into the same room where I gave my statement. This time, Riley was sitting opposite of me, and Jenks wasn't here.

"Where's her lawyer?" Seth asked.

"Someone told him the wrong precinct. He'll be here soon." Riley smirked, and I knew he was the one who fucked it up on purpose. He grabbed my arm away from Seth and pushed me toward the chair.

"Don't fuck up on a little thing and get the whole case dropped, Biers." Seth muttered before Riley kicked him out. The door slammed and then it was silent.

Riley paced around the room for a few minutes before sitting down in front of me.

"Why'd you do it?" He asked.

I stared at him and kept my face completely neutral.

"Edward's not the type to let someone else fight his battles. He wouldn't have asked you to do it." He waited a few seconds to see if he could get a reaction from me before he continued. "Maybe you just wanted to prove yourself. You were the head of the Cullen family."

"I'd like my lawyer." I told him calmly.

Riley got up and started walking in a circle around the table like a shark circling its prey. "You're a great match for Cullen. Both cold blooded murderers, willing to do whatever it takes to get what you want." He stopped right behind me and I could feel his hands resting on the back of my chair. It made the hair on the back of my neck stand up. "So, tell me, why did you want Volturi dead?"

"I'd like my lawyer." I repeated. I didn't see it coming, I couldn't have with him standing behind me. He gripped the back of my head and slammed it into the table.

"Jesus Christ!" I shouted. I could feel the blood begin to drip from my nose. Thankfully, I didn't hear or feel a crack, so I didn't think it was broken.

The door swung open and Seth and another officer came in. They pulled Riley away from me and Seth handed me a tissue.

"Who do you think you are, assaulting my client! And questioning her after she repeatedly asked for me? What the fuck are you doing, Biers?" I could hear Jenks out in the hall shouting.

I sat in the interrogation room alone while Jenks continued shouting at various people. I held the tissue up to my nose to stop the bleeding and couldn't believe that a few hours ago I was just driving down the highway with Edward.

…rep…

I woke up in a cell the next morning. It was dark and cold and just… horrible. Sleeping on the cot in here was like sleeping on the floor. Though, I didn't sleep much, or at all really.

For most of the day I just sat against the wall. There wasn't anything else to do. There was a guard sitting at a desk right across from me, but he didn't say anything and neither did I. _Never talk to anyone without Jenks present. Not the guard that they'll keep outside your cell, or even another civilian._

That afternoon Seth came down, a pair of handcuffs in his hands. "Your lawyer is here to see you. Stick your hands through here," he pointed to a small cut out in between the cell bars. I did as he instructed and winced as the metal closed around my wrists.

The loud bang of the cell door swinging open made me jump, even though I knew it was coming. _I hate this place, I hate this place, I hate this place_.

I expected to get taken to the interrogation room again, but Seth led me to a small room right around the corner from the cells. My heart nearly burst out of my chest when I saw Edward standing in the corner of the room.

I had to wait for Seth to undo my handcuffs but the moment they were off I was in his arms.

Jenks cleared his throat after only a few seconds. "We have a lot to discuss, Mrs. Cullen."

There was a small table in the center of the room with three chairs arranged around it. I sighed and sat down in the chair across from him, and Edward sat next to me.

"Your arraignment is this afternoon. They're charging you with conspiracy to commit manslaughter and first-degree murder. With your approval, we'll plead not guilty to both charges."

I nodded. "I was protecting myself."

"Exactly. They've named Benjamin Cheney as your conspirator. The police have issued a warrant for his arrest, but have yet to find him."

I looked over at Edward and he nodded, just slightly. Good, he took care of Ben. I didn't want him getting in any trouble over this.

"They will deny you bail, there's no doubt about it. The good news is they want the trial to start as soon as possible. They think they have all of the evidence they need. We've got our evidence, too."

I cocked my head to the side. What evidence?

"You have an exemplary record, Mrs. Cullen. You've donated millions to charity within the past year alone. Everyone I've talked to about you have done nothing but sing you praises. Your character will be out biggest ally."

"So how long do you think… how long will this trial last?"

"If things stick to this pace, a year, maybe two at the most."

Fuck. Two years. I know criminal trials last years, but it's a hell of a lot different when you're the one that is locked up the whole time.

Jenks started to pack up his things. "I'll see you at the courthouse. Let me know if you have any questions at all, Mrs. Cullen."

As soon as he was gone I dropped my head into my hands. Why did I think I could do this? How am I supposed to survive two years of this?

Edward's arm wrapped around me and pulled me into his chest. "I know this is hard, and I know it's horrible sitting in that cell all day. But we will get you out of here, Bella. Please don't give up."

It took me a few minutes to compose myself enough to pull away from him. "That detective…"

"Seth?"

"No, the other one. Riley? He slammed my head into the table yesterday."

Edward gripped my chin and studied my face. "Are you okay?" I nodded. "Fucker has been out for us for years. He's bitter. I'm sorry he's taking it out on you. Jenks is already in the process of having him removed from the case."

Jenks must have already told him about it. He's much too calm.

"I feel like I should have something big to say. It's like now, every time I see you might be –"

"I'll see you at the arraignment, and I'll be here every time Jenks meets with you. Even if it's just to hold your hand while he talks to you, I'll be there."

"Is that normal? Do people usually –"

"No, but I have some connections." Edward smirked.

…rep…

Jenks had been right about the arraignment. They denied bail, saying that I was a high-risk candidate. They thought I would run. Which, I suppose was a valid worry considering Edward very nearly had me run before they arrested me.

We submitted my plea of not guilty. I could feel the eyes of everyone in the room on me when the words left Jenks' mouth. They were all wondering the same thing. _Could she have really done it?_

Two weeks after the arraignment I was told I had a visitor. It made me smile, assuming Edward was surprising me. Seth and I followed our usual routine, though I still didn't know why I needed to be cuffed for the short walk to the visiting room. Protocol, I guessed.

I was disappointed that Edward wasn't the one waiting for me. Instead, Charlie sat in his place.

"What are you doing here?" I hadn't heard from Charlie since he called to chastise about Edward being arrested. I assumed, after that call, he wanted to cut all ties with me. I didn't blame him, though.

"What are you doing here, Bella?" Charlie's voice was harsh, harsher than I had ever heard before. I was a good kid growing up, I never snuck out or got caught drinking or anything like that. There was never any reason for him to be mad at me. Until now, I guessed.

"I didn't do anything."

"Bella, this man has ruined you! You're so talented, Bells, you could have done –"

"I don't need a lecture, Charlie. I won't sit here and let you talk badly about my husband."

"He's the reason you're in this mess, Bella. The man that attacked you was going after you because you were his wife!"

"No." I hissed. I lowered my voice and continued, "He attacked me because he was my biological father. He would have come after me anyway, whether I was married to Edward or not."

Charlie sat there, stunned for a few minutes. I let him absorb the information, and enjoyed the change of scenery while I could.

"The only reason I'm alive is because of Edward. He had a gun. If I had been alone, or at my place in Los Angeles I wouldn't have had a way to defend myself. So, don't blame Edward. Thank him."

"Bella…"

"It's a fucked up situation, believe me, I know. You don't have to stick by me. You can go back to Forks and enjoy your life with Renee and Jane. They're your family, your true family. I know you feel obligated to look after me, but you don't have to anymore."

"Do you know the things he's done Bella? How many people he's…"

"Stop. I know my husband. Just… go home Charlie."

He would never get over this. My father never even had so much as a speeding ticket. He was the most by-the-book man I had ever met. I knew after my call with him a few weeks ago that I had lost him when he realized who Edward was. He could never forgive me for marrying someone who stood for everything he hated.

I stood up from the table and knocked on the door. Seth opened it and snapped the cuffs back around my wrists.

…rep…

Two months. I had spent two months in this tiny cell and I was starting to think I was slowly going insane. I just felt wrong. Unstable.

I met with Jenks once a week, and Edward was usually with him. It was hard though, seeing him but not really being able to be with him. We couldn't sit down to a meal together and talk about our day, and we couldn't fall asleep on the couch wrapped in each other's arms. It was one big tease.

Sometimes I thought it might be easier if I didn't see Edward so often, yet not enough. Then I started to feel guilty, because those fleeting moments with him were the only things keeping me going.

I could see it was slowly killing him to see me falling apart. Every time he saw me I looked worse, I knew it. Right when I would walk into the room, while Seth was undoing my handcuffs, Edward would stare. His eyes would roam over my body and I knew he saw every little change. He saw how I had lost weight because I rarely ate, and he saw how empty my eyes were most of the time.

When he would touch me, I could feel his desperation. With every graze of his fingers along my arm, with every gentle kiss to my forehead, he was trying to slowly put me back together in any way he could.

The trial was starting in a few weeks. It was fast, according to Jenks, but that's what we wanted. The prosecutor was rushing things because they knew Edward would stop at nothing to find holes in their case. Jenks thought that they were hoping a rushed job would mean I got locked up for the rest of my life.

At least, once the trial started, I would have more to do during the day. Instead of sitting in my cell I could sit in a courtroom full of people who would decide my fate. I also had the extra bonus of knowing the trial was going to be broadcast on the news.

Jenks fought against it when the judge allowed cameras in the courtroom, but the judge had already decided. Cameras it was.

The rustling of keys made my eyes pop open, and I sat up in my uncomfortable cot. I expected to see Seth there, he was the only officer I ever really saw down here, but instead it was a man I had never seen before.

He had dark, cropped hair, and his skin was tanned like he just walked off a beach in Greece. He wore a police uniform.

"What's going on?"

"You have a visitor."

"Where's Detective Clearwater?" I asked, but tried to sound somewhat uninterested. I didn't want to blow his cover.

"Busy. Hands through the door."

I followed his instructions, though I didn't really want to. I was uneasy about being cuffed around someone I didn't know, or without Seth at least here. The last time I was alone with someone like this was when Riley slammed my head into the table.

Once the door slid open the officer grabbed my arm in a firm grip and tugged me toward the visiting room.

No one was there.

I turned around to ask what was going on, but I was met with a fist connecting with my cheek. It was horrid timing, but the only thing I could think of was how I had just gotten rid of my last black eye a few weeks ago, and now I was going to have another one.

My wrists were still cuffed, so there wasn't much I could do for protection. I tried to fight him off, but the hits just kept on coming. I fell over eventually and as soon as I was down one hand was around my neck and the other covering my mouth and pinching my nose.

My bound wrists tried to pull his hands off of me, but he was too strong and I was at an odd angle because of the cuffs.

The door swung open just as my vision started to black out. I watched through blurry eyes as Seth pulled the man off of me, but he managed a swift kick to my ribs before Seth got him out.

I was left panting on the floor for a minute before another officer walked in. He leaned down next to me, but I pushed myself as far away from him as possible. My ribs protested and my head swam, but I couldn't take anymore.

"Please don't touch me. _Please_."

"It's okay, Mrs. Cullen. I'm not going to hurt you." He said calmly. He held out his hand in a peaceful surrender.

My vision started to blur again, then everything went black.

…rep…

My head was pounding and everything hurt. I was far too comfortable to still be in my cell. This wasn't my usual cot, the mattress underneath me was actually padded and comfortable.

I squinted my eyes open but hissed at the bright light and closed them as fast as I could. There was rustling somewhere in the room, and then the bright light still visible through my closed eyelids disappeared.

Cracking my eyes open, I saw a dark hospital room. I tried to sit up to take a better look around, but two things stopped me. One, the painful ache of my ribs. Two, the handcuffs hooking each hand to the edge of the bed. _I'm so fucking sick of handcuffs_.

"How do you feel?"

My head snapped to my left and saw Edward sitting in the dark. He was in a dark suit, but looked adorably rumpled. Like he had been in it for too long. "Like shit."

He came over to stand next to me and grabbed one of my hands, as best he could around the cuffs, and ever so gently cupped my cheek with his other. He was barely touching my face, but I could feel the heat of his skin there.

"Will you tell me what happened?"

"Seth is usually the one who comes to get me if I ever leave my cell. This other guy was there today. He was in a police uniform, I assumed it was fine. He got me to the visiting room and just… attacked. I was still cuffed, there was nothing I could do."

Edward pulled his chair closer and sat next to me. "He was a hitman. He snuck into the precinct with the uniform and knew exactly where to find you." He took a deep breath before he went on. "You have a concussion, a broken rib, and another black eye."

Edward's head fell and be peppered kisses along my arm. The light pressure of his soft lips made me want to burst into tears. "I don't know how much longer I can do this." I admitted.

"I know, baby." Edward sighed. "The trial will start soon, then we're on the downhill slope. Jenks has a strong case, Bella."

"I miss you." I sighed.

"I'm right here." He told me, giving my hand a gentle squeeze.

"No, I miss _you_. I miss my husband who would send me dirty text messages in the middle of the day, and I miss the way you would kiss me like your life depended on it when you hadn't seen me for a few hours. I miss our life together and every day I feel like the odds of us ever getting that back diminish a little bit more."

Edward looked at me; his eyes showing how defeated he felt. "Every time before I see you I try to think of something to say that will make you feel better. I want to tell you it'll be all right but then shit like this happens.

"You have no idea how… furious I was when Jessica gave me the message from the police department. I swear, I almost shot her for not interrupting the meeting I was in. You were helpless, fucking handcuffed while he tried to kill you. Every time I think of it I want to pull my hair out.

"It fucking kills me, watching you get cuffed and hauled out of the visiting room. Having to leave you there just _kills me_."

He was losing it, the calm, cool composure he always worked so hard to have whenever he saw me was breaking apart. I knew how horrible it was to be the one out the outside, too. I spent every day Edward was locked up imagining him stuck in a small cell, withering away.

Instinctively, I started to reach up to wrap my arms around him, to comfort him in any way that I could, but the cuffs around my wrists stopped me. Edward leaned over me and pressed a kiss to my forehead. It was the best he could do with my current situation.

"I like this," I muttered. It earned me an incredulous look from Edward. "Not this whole situation, obviously," I said, jingling my handcuffs against the bed frame. "The whole not constantly talking about me or the trial. I haven't gotten to just talk to you in a long time."

Edward pressed kisses all over my face, always careful of the sore spots, and sat back in his chair next to me. "Well, let's see. Alice and Rosalie are complete messes. They want to come see you, but I know how they'll react. It'll be all about them, you shouldn't have to put up with that. Emmett and Jasper are out for blood. I have them looking into who hired the man from today." He grabbed my hand and started playing with my fingers as he continued. "Emmett told me he and Rose are also trying to get pregnant."

"That's good. I know Rose wants a baby." I whispered.

Edward nodded, but quickly changed the subject. "Kate calls me once a week to see how you're doing. She's planning to come up once the trial starts."

"She is?" I was surprised at that. I got a visit from her a while ago, and she was kind and caring, but I could tell she was nervous, too. We had grown apart the last few months before everything fell apart. I still considered her as one of my best friends, though.

"Yeah. She's just worried about you. I'll have her set up at Five while she's here."

"Thank you."

There was a commotion outside, and Edward squeezed my hand before going to see what it was. When he returned, just a minute later, he had his whole family with him. Alice and Rose were carrying balloons and had a giant stuffed bear held between them. Emmett and Jasper both took up a spot on either side of me. They just stood there for a moment, and I was confused about why, but then I felt the metal around my wrists drop.

"Oh, my God! Thank you!" I shouted. I rubbed my wrists and smiled up at them.

"No problem. Eddie should have thought ahead and brought his kit." Emmett smirked, zipping up a small black pouch and stuffing it into Rose's purse.

"What are you guys doing here? Are you going to get in trouble?" I asked, looking around at them. The sight of so many familiar faces made me want to cry, but I didn't want to ruin the moment.

"You're about to go on trial for murder and want to know if we're going to get in trouble for visiting you in the hospital?" Jasper asked, an eyebrow cocked in my direction. The room was completely silent after Jasper's joke. When I started laughing, everyone followed suit.

"Stupid question, huh?" I asked through my laughs.

I scooted over in my bed, as much as the pain in my ribs would allow, and patted the spot next to me. Edward got in bed carefully and wrapped his arms around me.

I laid my head on his chest and relaxed for the first time in months. I didn't do much talking. I listened to my family around me, and the steady beat of Edward's heart.

…rep…

I sat in the back of an armored car. My wrists were cuffed to a chain on the ground, but I was out of the blue jail uniform for the first time in nearly four months. I had never been so relieved to be in a pair of jeans and a sweater. It was nearly October, so it was getting pretty chilly out. Or so I'm told.

Today was the first day of the trial. Jenks and his associate, Mark, were starting the process of jury selection. He told me that it's a process that could take weeks because of how much attention the case has gotten in the news.

I didn't like to think about that, the news coverage. I knew it would be all over the place, but thankfully I haven't had it thrown in my face at all. Yet.

Jenks told me that the trial itself would be a circus. News outlets from across the country would be waiting outside the courthouse, and a few were even allowed inside the courtroom. And there was the added bonus that the trial was going to be broadcast live.

The car stopped and made my heart do the same. This would be the first time I was really outside since the arraignment. I didn't know if I was ready to see the flashing lights or hear the things people would call me. I needed this to be over with as soon as possible, though. I needed out.

The door swung open and Seth hopped in to deal with my cuffs. I was supposed to be constantly cuffed because I was considered a maximum-security prisoner. I was pretty sure they thought Edward would break me out and were just trying to make it that much harder for him to do.

The one thing I knew I couldn't do was shrink down against the scrutiny. I needed to keep my head held high and my confidence in my innocence intact. I couldn't let anyone see a weak spot.

So, with my hands cuffed together in front of me and my eyes trained on the courthouse doors just up the steps ahead of me, I let Seth lead me out of the car. The chaos around me was unparalleled; the red carpet at the Oscars didn't have this many flashes and calls.

It was a little calmer once we were actually inside the courthouse, but not much. There were still people everywhere, and all eyes were on me. Seth weaved us through the crowd and through the doors of the courtroom.

The courtroom was a different story. There was no empty seat, but the people here were much more quiet and subdued. Respectful. Seth led me down the aisle and I scanned the crowd for Edward.

I saw him right in the front. He stood as I walked past, and gave me a nod. It took all of my restraint not to throw myself at him.

Once I was in my seat next to Jenks, Seth released my wrists. Right in front of me on the table was a tiny vase with a small daisy in it. I looked over at the table on the other side of the room, but there wasn't one there. Edward must have put it there for me.

I turned around and mouthed 'Thank you' to him, and was rewarded with a rare smirk. It had been a long time since I had seen a sincere smirk or smile on his face.

Selecting the jury took two weeks. It seemed ridiculous to me, but a lot more went into choosing jurors than I ever knew. There were profiles to study and a million things to consider; their marital status, their relationships with people who could possibly have a connection with the Cullen's, Jenks even asked everyone how often they spent watching movies or television.

I had gotten into a routine during the jury selection. I was able to get out of my cell and watch as Jenks and Mark did their job. It wasn't very stressful, because the trial, while officially started, hadn't really gotten too serious yet.

Then, the day came where we had all jurors and alternates chosen. The morning I walked in for the opening statements I was a mess. I was nervous and terrified. I grabbed the small daisy out of the tiny vase, a new one was placed there every day, and ran my fingers over the petals as Jenks stood to address the jury, formally, for the first time.

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the prosecution will try to paint Isabella Cullen as a monster. They are going to invasively dig into her personal life, her career, and her relationship with her husband. But, Isabella Cullen is more than Edward Cullen's wife. She's a philanthropist, having donated millions of dollars to charities across the world since she was seventeen. She's a business woman who deals with multi-million-dollar contracts on a regular basis. And she's an award-winning actress and songwriter.

"She isn't the monster the prosecution will try to convince you of. She's a young woman who defended herself in a way you would all want your own children to do if faced with a similar situation. I hope, after we are done with this trial, you will see Isabella Cullen for who she truly is."

I watched the jury closely as Jenks spoke, but they didn't give away much. I saw one woman, maybe in her forties, nod when Jenks talked about wanting their own children to protect themselves. That had to be a good sign, even though there was still so much more to be said.

The prosecutor got up across the room. He glared at me as he passed, but I just stared at him. Anger shot through me, and I suddenly had the overwhelming desire to defend myself. This entire thing was such bullshit. I shot a man who broke into my home and have spent four months in jail because of it.

Ever since I married Edward it seemed as though the entire world has looked for a reason to take me down. I've had to deal with invasive questions about Edward's past girlfriends, and I've had to deal with men attacking me for no reason other than the fact that I was Edward Cullen's wife.

I did something bad, there's no denying that. I murdered someone, and that was something I would have to live with for the rest of my life. But, he did something bad, too. He had it coming. I defended myself when I needed to, and I was proud of it.

I looked around the room at the cameras and the people taking copious notes about every word said and every look exchanged. Most of the people in this room wanted to see me burn. They wanted to tie me to a stake and watch me, my career, my life go up in flames. It was my own personal Salem witch trial.

 _They're burning all the witches even if you aren't one. So, light me up._

 **A/N: If this story inspires you to listen to one song, I hope it's I Did Something Bad. It just fits so well with this chapter I think. I hope you enjoyed this one. The last italicized line is actually another lyric from the song.**

 **We've got three more chapters, an epilogue, and then a likely EPOV outtake coming. I'm not sure how much I'll do in EPOV, it could be one long chapter with various outtakes, or a few. We'll see. Let me know any specific EPOV scenes you'd like!**

 **A lot of people have asked how Bella got arrested if Edward had Seth on the inside. The answer is, Seth is mostly there for information. There is no way he could have stopped the whole investigation without drawing some major attention to himself.**

 **Good news is the next chapter is already written and I'll post that for you all tomorrow night!**


	13. Don't Blame Me

**I'm going to go ahead and issue a tissue warning here, considering I cried about five times writing this. Remember, we'll get that HEA!**

* * *

 _Baby, for you I would fall from grace, just to touch your face. If you walk away, I'd beg you on my knees to stay. Don't blame me, love made me crazy. If it doesn't, you ain't doing it right. Lord, save me, my drug is my baby. I'll be usin' for the rest of my life. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **Don't Blame Me**_

…rep..

 _THE DOWNFALL OF ISABELLA CULLEN_

 _Isabella Cullen, 24, had the world at her feet. She has an impressive list of accolades including three Academy Awards, three Grammys, and an Emmy. She was a major contender for most major award shows throughout the last year, but every organization took her off of the ballot following her arrest. She was in her prime until she met businessman Edward Cullen three years ago._

 _In her most recent music/film crossover, Hopeless Kingdom, Cullen documents her love affair with the man suspected of being one of the most ruthless members of Chicago's underground scene. That first meeting at a police benefit in Chicago was the beginning of the downfall of Isabella Cullen, formerly Swan. Here is our outline of everything that went wrong for Swan, and the events that led to her fall from grace._

 _Swan met Cullen while on her tour promoting her first music/film crossover project, Welcome to the Badlands. They began a whirlwind romance with late night visits and backstage meetings. While no mention of her future husband's illicit dealings are mentioned in the film, it is safe to assume at the beginning of their relationship she was unaware of who exactly the man she was seeing was._

 _In her film, Swan depicts a falling out between her and Cullen a few months into her relationship. They reached a boiling point of sorts, with both of their busy schedules to blame for their falling out. But, this is where most believe Swan found out about Cullen's dealings. Had Swan broken things off with Cullen when she discovered he was the second in command of one of the most dangerous families in Chicago, she likely wouldn't be sitting in a jail cell right now._

 _But, weeks after their fight they are shown reconciling at Cullen's sisters birthday party, where they have their infamous wild night in New York City, spending upwards of $60,000 on a hotel suite and amenities. They leave on good terms, agreeing to talk more about their situation when Swan gets back from promoting the final Tainted film._

 _The next big piece in Swan's downfall is the shooting that occurred at the Los Angeles premiere. Swan was shot twice, in her shoulder and abdomen, and spent a week unconscious in the hospital following a ten-hour life-saving surgery. The surgery, however, also lost her unborn child with Cullen and her ability to conceive again._

 _Sources say that the shooting was not connected to Swan at all, not really. A hit was placed on her because of her association with Cullen. Cullen, who was being groomed to take over for his father, had never been seen in such a serious relationship by his colleagues. Taking out Cullen's girl was an act of war, so to speak._

 _After the shooting, Cullen supposedly saved Swan from what looks to be a suicide attempt after being gone on business following the attack. In reality, many suspect he was out finding the man who shot Swan, a man the police have never been able to track down._

 _Swan and Cullen laid low following the shooting, aside from a surprise appearance from Cullen at the Vanity Fair part after Swan won big at the Oscars. Their romance wasn't confirmed at the time, and Cullen remained a relative unknown following the appearance. They didn't reappear until a year later at the same event after announcing their marriage._

 _One would have to assume that Swan, now Cullen, would know about her husband's dealings once they were married at the very least. Now, the girl who used to be America's Sweetheart was sharing the bed of a stone-cold murderer and seemed happier than she had ever been._

 _This is the pivotal turn in Swan. She expected the world to accept her new husband and enjoy their love story with the release of Hopeless Kingdom. They did, to an extent, until they discovered who her husband truly was. Following a botched interview where she was attacked with Cullen's past conquests, Swan left a cryptic message on her social media and disappeared from the internet all together. She went on a small tour in support of her new project, only 10 stadium shows across the country. Her husband's company sponsored the tour after it was reported that the original sponsors dropped her._

 _Swan was digging herself into a deeper hole, attaching her career to her new husband. Her most loyal fans were divided into groups that were happy to see her so happy, and ones that were shocked that she could love someone like Cullen. That didn't stop her from selling out ten stadium shows, though._

 _The moment the old Isabella Swan was truly dead was when her husband, his brother, and brother-in-law were arrested for the disappearance of Aro Volturi, another prominent member of Chicago's crime scene. Swan took over her husband's business, and many suspect she was the head of the Cullen family for the duration of their arrest because weeks later she killed the man her husband was suspected of murdering. She cleared his name while landing herself with conspiracy to commit manslaughter and first-degree murder charges._

 _Now, Isabella Cullen's trial has been in full swing for five months. Cullen herself is set to take the stand next week and many expect her testimony to last weeks. It will be the first time the public has heard from her in the nine months since her Hopeless Kingdom tour ended. It is safe to assume she is no longer the woman we once knew her to be._

"Jesus Christ," I muttered, throwing the magazine down on the table. They knew everything, or suspected at least. It was a Time's article, so it was a more credible source, but still. Fuck.

"So, the public is sure I did it." I said.

Edward paced the visiting room, and Jenks sat calmly across from me. My trial started five months ago. It has been a constant struggle to sit in that courtroom. I knew there was a camera on me at all times and I had to keep my face neutral, but there were times I just wanted to scream or cry.

The prosecution did exactly what Jenks said they would do in his opening statement. They made me out to be a complete monster. They depicted me as a selfish gold-digger that wanted to be with Edward because of his status. They've used my bank statements to say that I was frivolous and irresponsible. They said that I peaked with my own career, and now I was looking for something more exciting from life. They said I was an adrenaline junkie. They accused me of being hooked on pills. Nothing was off limits.

The last five months have been hell. Absolute hell. Now, in two days I have to take the stand and deal with questions from the prosecutor. He's an asshole. He's rude and demanding and every time he looks at me I want to vomit.

"The public is speculating. Everything in there is a guess." Jenks said.

"Now, I think you're prepared for your testimony. I'll give you two a few minutes alone. I'll see you Monday, Mrs. Cullen. Mr. Cullen," Jenks gave us both nods and quietly leaves.

Edward sighed and sat next to me. He took both of my hands in his and traced the constant red marks that were now always around my wrists. "Carlisle is back."

"What?" I asked him, shocked. I hadn't really thought about Carlisle in a long time. I knew that was terrible of me, he was sick and I should have made more of an effort to be concerned about him, but I just didn't have the mental capacity to worry about everything at once.

"He's fine, back to normal. He'd like to visit you this weekend if you're okay with it." His fingers locked with mine. It was the most intimacy we'd had in nine months. I felt like I didn't even know my husband anymore. I just got glimpses of him in the courtroom and fleeting moments like this after Jenks left us alone. "There's something else, too."

"Oh?"

"Members of the… underground community are getting nervous about your testimony. They think I've given you information to help you get a reduced sentence. Plus, there's what you already know on your own."

My heart started to race. That wasn't good. "So, what does that mean?"

"It means they see us both as threats. Carlisle wants me to leave town."

"Oh. _Oh_. You need to leave… me?"

"No, you're my wife, Bella. Nothing will ever change that. I just won't be able to be in the courtroom with you for a while. It's not safe for either of us."

I looked down at our hands to hide my tears, but my quick sniffle gave me away. Edward pulled me into his chest and whispered loving words to me, but it didn't help calm me down.

This trial had officially taken everything away from me. My freedom, my career, and my husband.

"The trial should be over in just a couple more months. Then it's you and me again, I promise." Edward lifted my head to look at him and brushed some of my hair out of my face. It had grown a lot and was a bit of a mess, but I didn't really care about it anymore.

"So, this is the last time I'll see you for a long time." I whispered. I rested my forehead against his and got myself lost in his mossy eyes. I needed to memorize the exact shade so I could remember it the next few months.

"Yes," Edward sighed. His eyes were doing exactly what mine were, memorizing every detail they could. "Carlisle will be at your trial, keeping an eye on you. I know you don't really know him, not the real him, but you can trust him now. I wouldn't let him near you if I thought he was a threat."

"Okay."

"I love you."

"I love you, too. A lot."

We had a few more minutes together and talked about random things to distract ourselves from our inevitable separation. "Who will take over everything?"

"Emmett. He knows the ins and outs of everything. It's just for a while."

"Did you ever find the mole?" I asked. I had completely forgotten about it, and Edward hadn't mentioned it.

"Uh, no, actually. They either left or stopped leaking information. Maybe they got scared. I'll have to deal with it when I get back."

There was a knock at the door and our time was up. We stood and I hugged Edward with all of the strength I had. He kissed me softly, our kisses never went past soft pecks here, and squeezed me to him for a second longer.

I stared at him for a minute, told him that I loved him, and then listed off the men I met with the night of the attack.

…rep…

A day later, I was seated across from Carlisle. It was completely awkward after everything that had transpired between us in the past. But, I had to remember that it wasn't really him that did those things, he couldn't control himself.

"I'd like to apologize to you, Isabella." He started.

"Bella," I corrected him. I didn't need formalities.

"Bella," Carlisle smiled at me and it was nearly identical to Edward's. It made my heart clench. "I have never been myself around you. I apologize for all of the hurt and pain I have put you through. I know an apology isn't enough, but it's all I have to give you at the moment."

"It's okay. I understand. Is, um, is Edward okay?" It had only been a day, but ever since he said we were both in danger all I could picture was the worst.

"Yes, he's fine. I'll make sure of it." Carlisle nodded. "I just wanted to meet you again and let you know that you can trust me. I'll make sure you're safe."

I nodded and looked down at my hands. "Thank you."

"You're a very strong woman, Bella. You make my son a better man. I will make sure you get back to him."

…rep…

I had straightened my skirt about twenty times since I sat down. The judge was about to start for the day, and today would be the first day I had to take the stand and address everyone myself. It was also the first day I didn't have a tiny daisy in front of me.

Carlisle was here though, as promised. He smiled warmly at me as I was walked past him, and it did comfort me for a moment.

I smoothed down my black pencil skirt yet again as I walked toward the stand.

"Would you please state your name for the court?"

"Isabella Cullen."

"Please spell your first and last name."

"I-S-A-B-E-L-L-A C-U-L-L-E-N"

I put my hand on the Bible in front of me. "Do you swear that the evidence you are about to give is the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God?"

"Yes," I nodded.

"Please take a seat."

I got myself situated in the seat and took a deep breath. I looked out at the packed courthouse in front of me and had to count my breaths to keep myself from becoming too overwhelmed. The prosecution would be questioning me first, and Jenks as soon as they were done, but I knew the prosecution would hold nothing back. When Jenks questioned me, I would know what he was asking and already have the perfect answer ready. This was a different story

His questions started off simple. He asked me about my life growing up and I painted the picture of my quiet upbringing in Forks. My actual upbringing, the part where I was the consequence of an illicit affair and dumped in a trashcan, was thankfully still a secret. We spend days going over my career and how it shaped me into who I was today. I could see where he was going.

"So, you enjoy the attention your career as an actress gives you?"

"I don't know if I enjoy the attention so much as the work. I like making movies and music, and I like seeing people's reactions to them. I don't necessarily want them involved in every aspect of my life, at least not anymore."

"So, at one point, you did want all of the attention?"

"At one point I thought I owed the public a look into my life. I thought I owed them that because they got me to where I was."

"But, you don't feel you owe them anything anymore?"

"No. I gave them everything I had for years. I'd like some privacy again."

"Privacy with your husband, Mr. Edward Cullen."

"Yes, I'd like some privacy with my husband."

"So, you'll never make another project like…" He made a point of looking at a piece of paper on his desk before he continued. " _Welcome to the Badlands_ or _Hopeless Kingdom_?"

"I wouldn't say never. After everything that's happened I'd like to tell the world my side of the story eventually."

"You'll use the death of Aro Volturi to promote a new project, then?"

"No. That's not what I said."

The days dragged on in a similar fashion to that. The prosecutor, Embry Call, dragged me through the dirt. He pointed out every possible mistake I could have made in my life, they had videos of every interview I did and showed how I seemed to have a problem with authority at times. They tore me apart.

By the time we got to the subject of Edward, nearly a week after I had first started my testimony, I was exhausted and frustrated. Call knew it, too.

"Mrs. Cullen, what was your first encounter with your husband like?"

I actually smiled a bit at the question. "I was at a police benefit in Chicago. I had been donating to the department for a while because they helped me out of a sticky situation a while back. I was seated at the Cullen's table. My husband and his brother came to sit down, and they were talking about the 'airhead actress' that had descended upon the event."

"So, he insulted you the first time you met him?"

"I wasn't insulted. If he had known who I was he wouldn't have been talking about me like that to my face. He politely apologized after he realized what happened."

"Did you talk to him much after that?"

"I talked with his family mostly, he chimed in a bit as well."

"What did he say to you?"

"Objection! Your honor, Mrs. Cullen is protected by spousal privilege, she doesn't need to disclose conversations she's had with Mr. Cullen."

The judge nodded and looked over at Call. "Sustained. Change the subject, Mr. Call."

"How did Mr. Cullen act around you early on in your relationship, Mrs. Cullen?"

"He was very kind to me. He made sure I was happy and comfortable wherever we were."

"When did you first have sex with Mr. Cullen?"

"Objection! Is that really a necessary invasion into the Cullen's privacy?"

"Your honor, I'm trying to determine what kind of woman Mrs. Cullen is."

"Overruled. Please answer the question, Mrs. Cullen."

"Um, it was three, maybe four weeks after I had met him. I don't remember the exact number." I replied. I hated the fact that I was blushing and the whole country could see it. I hated everything.

"Did you and Mr. Cullen have an active sex life?"

I furrowed my brow at that. "Yes."

"Did you and your husband ever engage in those activities outside of the privacy of your home?"

"Objection! Mrs. Cullen isn't here to talk about her sex life!"

"Your honor, I'm just establishing what I believe to be the start of Mrs. Cullen's deviant behavior. Mrs. Cullen, if you could answer the question, please."

Edward's office. He knew, he had to if he was asking this specifically. Someone from his office must have heard us. There was no point in lying if he already knew. "Once, yes."

"And, where were you?"

"My husband's office."

"And what was the nature of your –"

"I had sex with my husband in his office." I snapped, narrowing my eyes at Call. "I sucked his cock while he sat at his desk and then he bent me over it and _fucked_ me. Is that what you want to know?"

The judge called for a short recess after my outburst. Jenks tried to talk to me during it, but I didn't really absorb anything he said. Call was baiting me and I couldn't ignore it anymore. I was a little less tense when we resumed, though.

"Mrs. Cullen, back to the three to four weeks you said it was before you were intimate with Mr. Cullen. Is that about how long it was before you slept with your previous partners?"

I shrugged, confused by why any of this mattered. Jenks didn't object though. "I guess so. It varied, I think."

"What about your last partner, before Mr. Cullen?"

"Objection! Judge, this is all irrelevant."

"Either get to your point or move on, Call."

"Let me rephrase, the man you were with before Mr. Cullen was Jacob Black, correct?"

 _Shit_. I had done a good job at keeping eye contact with Call the whole time. Jenks told me that was important, it let him know I wasn't intimidated by him. Even as I admitted to my indiscretions in Edward's office I maintained eye contact. But, at the mention of Jacob my head fell and my eyes locked on my hands in my lap.

Welcome to the Badlands was about our relationship, but I changed the whole part about me finding out he was married. I thought it was too much of a giveaway. In the movie, he just cheated on me.

"Yes."

"Mr. Black has been married to his wife for seven years. Were you physically intimate with a married man, Mrs. Cullen?"

 _Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry_. I repeated my mantra in my head until I replied. "I didn't know he was married."

"To be clear, you had an affair with a married man, sixteen years your senior prior to your relationship with Mr. Cullen?"

I hesitated, not wanting to admit the truth. "Yes, but as soon as I found out he was married I ended it."

The courtroom erupted in conversation and all I could do was sit there while everyone tore me apart. The judge called an end to my testimony for the day.

I didn't let myself breakdown until I was back in my cell. It was odd, the first few months I was here I wanted nothing more than to get out of it, even if it was just to go to the courtroom for the trial. Now, the trial seemed like the real prison and my cell was the only place I felt safe anymore. I was even more mentally fucked than I had been when I first got here.

I sat in the corner of my cot and cried. I cried because I felt like I was going to be stuck here for the rest of my life and because I just wanted to hold Edward's hand. I just wanted another second with him next to me and no worries distracting us. He was all I had left, and I hadn't seen him in weeks.

I looked over at the officer stationed right outside of my cell. "Can I talk to Detective Clearwater?" I asked. He just nodded and scurried off.

Seth came back, alone. "What's wrong?"

"Can I call Edward?" I whispered. Edward had given me a phone number before he left that last time but told me it was for emergencies only. I just needed to hear his voice.

Seth nodded and took me out, cuff-free, and let me sit by the desk. I picked up the old land line and dialed the number I had memorized.

"Hello?"

The second his voice was in my ear I broke down. My body hunched over as I held the phone to my ear and I could hardly breathe through my sobs.

" _Bella_ ," I could barely hear him over my tears, but just knowing that I had a little part of him with me, his voice, made me feel a little bit better. "It's okay, Bella. Fuck, I'm so sorry, baby." Edward talked to me for a while, just muttering sweet nothings to me because it was all he could do.

"I can't keep doing this, Edward." I breathed out.

"Just a little while longer, sweetheart."

"I miss you, just seeing you sitting behind me. Any my little daisy every day. I just –" I took a few steadying breaths, trying to hold more tears back. "I miss you."

"I miss you, too. Every day, Bella." He whispered over the phone. His voice was deep with emotion suddenly. "Whatever happens, no matter what, you have to stay strong. You have to come back to me, okay?"

His words seemed out of place. Like he was talking about something other than the trial. But I would take any conversation with Edward I could get. "Okay."

…rep…

I repeated Edward's words in my head throughout my testimony for the rest of the week. _Whatever happens, no matter what, you have to stay strong_. I could do that. I had to do that.

It was a relief when Call finally stopped tearing my character apart and got on to the actual case. I had no problem talking about that night anymore. It was hard at first, reliving the night over and over again, but I had described it so many times since then I had become kind of numb to the whole thing.

"Mrs. Cullen, can you tell us about the day leading up to the attack?"

"I was in my husband's office for the most part. He left me as the interim CEO of his company, but I was mostly there to just sign some documents when needed and make sure things didn't get too out of control."

"That night, after you left the office, what did you do?"

"I went to our penthouse in the city and met with some colleagues."

"What kind of colleagues?"

"Other members of his business. Honestly, I don't even know if I remember any of their names, it was a chaotic time for me." That was a lie. I knew their names.

"And you went home after this meeting, to your house outside of the city?"

"Yes. I told my bodyguards that I wanted to be alone when we got there."

"And why, Mrs. Cullen, would you want to be alone?"

"My husband was in jail, I had the stress of running a multi-million-dollar company on a high school education, and I was exhausted. Sometimes you just want the house to yourself."

"You would think a woman in your situation would want the protection. You're a well-known public figure."

I waited for him to continue, but he just stared at me. "I didn't hear a question."

Call smirked at me, but it wasn't a friendly one. "You have an extensive security system in your home, correct?"

"Yes."

"A system that was disarmed when Mr. Volturi got there, correct?"

"Yes. I forgot to set it. My husband usually took care of it."

"It seems like an awful big coincidence for you to want to send your guards away, and for you to forget to set the alarm. Were you trying to lure Mr. Volturi to you, Mrs. Cullen."

" _No_. I was tired and stressed and scared. Things fall through the cracks when you're as worn out as I was. I was 22 and had no clue what I was doing running that company. It was exhausting."

"Then why would your husband put you in charge?"

"Objection! Spousal privilege, your honor."

"Sustained. New question, Call."

"Did you want to lure Aro Volturi into your home so you could kill him and clear your husband's name?"

"No."

"Did you leave the security system down because you wanted Aro Volturi to break into your home so you could kill him?"

"No."  
"Did you ask your security guard to leave you alone because you wanted Aro Volturi to break into your home so you could kill him?"

" _No_."

…rep…

Two days later, after the weekend to cool down from the last day on the stand, I was back in the courtroom. I tried to take things one day at a time. When I was in the courtroom I didn't have much time to think about the questions they were asking me, or what they were trying to accomplish with them. I just answered them as truthfully as I could.

But, when I got back to my cell, all I could do was relive every second of it. My weekends weren't spent relaxing or recuperating. They were spent reliving and worrying.

Carlisle wasn't here yet, which was odd. But there was a small daisy sitting in front of me that made me smile.

Just before the judge could call the session in order, loud shots sounded throughout the area. They weren't in here, they were muddled a little bit, but they were close. It seemed like everyone froze in the seconds following the shots, but my brain was moving in overtime.

I looked at the small daisy in front of me, and then behind me at where Carlisle should be seated. The pieces started to fall into place.

I stood up from my chair despite the numbness that started to take over my body and started to walk toward the door. Guards started shouting at me but I started running toward the door.

"Edward," I whispered to myself, my legs moving a little bit faster. I managed to push the courtroom door open just a little bit before a guard pulled me back. Carlisle was crouching over a body, covered in blood. I could see the top of his head, though. His ruffled copper hair that I loved to run my fingers through.

"Edward!" I screamed, but the guards pulled me away from the door. They lifted me off of my feet, but I started kicking and screaming. "That's my husband! Let me go!" I cried. Two guards were surrounding me now. "Please, I need to make sure he's okay! Edward!" I kept shouting, but no one was listening. The guards were too big for me to get away from. It was like they didn't even feel my arms or legs and I punched and kicked anywhere I could reach.

"Take her to my chambers," the judge said.

Jenks appeared by my side and I stared at him like he had three heads. "Do something!" I shouted at him. He shook his head at me sadly.

"I need to see him!" I screamed as I fought the guards until they had me pushed out of a back door.

…rep…

I pulled the dress up around my body. I didn't really pay attention to the design or feel of it. It was black, that was all I knew. Black was what you wore to a funeral.

My hands shook as I pulled the zipper up my back. I couldn't get it up all of the way, but Rosalie came over and finished it for me. She didn't say anything, though.

I had been released from custody for twelve hours. I had a tracker around my ankle that would alert someone if I deviated off of a set path. The path from Carlisle and Esme's home to the church, and then to the cemetery where I would bury my husband.

The thought made my stomach lurch and I pushed away from Rosalie and curled myself around the toilet. I brushed my teeth quickly, again, and reached for the jewelry Alice had brought over for me.

It felt stupid, worrying about accessorizing my outfit considering everything that had happened, but they were important pieces. My wedding rings, the bracelet that Edward gave me for my birthday the first time I celebrated it with him, and the pair of earrings I gave Seth the day I got arrested.

He made good on his promise to get them to Edward, and Edward set them neatly in my jewelry box when he got them. At least, that's what I imagined him doing. That's where Alice found them.

When we walked into the church, the same church where Emmett and Rosalie got married so long ago, everyone stared at me. Some were pity stares for the twenty-four-year-old widow, and some were stares of people worried I would whip out a gun and shoot them myself.

Jasper held my arm as we walked. He didn't say anything, he just grabbed me and slowed his pace to match my own. The church was nearly full, we were some of the last to arrive.

My legs froze right at the entrance of the church. Everyone else went ahead, and Jasper stood with me. "Who did it?" I whispered to him.

"Bella, you don't –"

"Who did it?" I asked again, my voice harsher this time.

"Felix and Demetri."

I didn't know why I needed to know then. I just couldn't walk into that room full of all those random people without knowing.

Carlisle told me that a lot of people would be here, business men and women, politicians… Edward was a powerful man with a long list of acquaintances. I hated them all. I hated everyone these days.

The picture of him situated next to the casket was an old shot from a piece done on him before we met. He wasn't smiling, but you could tell there was mischief in his eyes. I stared at them throughout the entire service.

Everyone started to get up to leave, but I kept my eyes on the picture in front of me. A hand was on my shoulder and a disgusting voice in my ear.

"Let me know if you want a conjugal visit from me sometime, baby." Felix whispered in my ear. Aro must have never told him that I was biologically his sister. I grabbed his hand off of my shoulder and pulled back four of his fingers until I felt satisfying snaps.

"Once I'm out, I will have absolutely nothing left to lose. I will spend every second of the rest of my life hunting you and your brother down. I will stop at nothing until I have your blood on my hands."

Felix stared at me, but I never took my eyes off of the picture of Edward. I think it was Emmett that told him to get lost, but I wasn't completely sure.

Everyone around us started to leave, but I was frozen in my seat.

"We've got to go, Bella." Jasper whispered to me.

I looked around and realized the entire church was empty except for the two of us now. "Who's going to take… him?" I asked, looking toward the closed casket.

"People will be here to bring him to the cemetery in a few minutes."

"We shouldn't leave him alone. I'll wait. He – he shouldn't be alone." I whispered. I had a continuous string of tears flowing from my eyes since I first heard the gunshots three days ago, now was no different.

Jasper took his seat next to me, and we waited.

We were the last to arrive at the cemetery, but that was okay. It was only family. Edward had a large extended family, and nearly all of them showed up for the funeral, but most of them stood back for his immediate family here. I hadn't met most of them, but I didn't care at the moment.

I started hyperventilating as the casket was lowered into the ground. My sobs were grotesquely loud, louder than Esme's and Alice's as they clutched each other. I couldn't breathe.

Once everyone started to leave the cemetery Carlisle pulled me aside and wrapped his arms around me. I still didn't know the man very well, but I rested my head against his chest and tried to get my breathing under control.

Carlisle rubbed my back and whispered something to me. It didn't stop my sobs, though, it just made me cry that much harder.

…rep…

I was back in my seat on the witness stand. The trial had been postponed for a week after the incident, but we were back to it today. Jenks had talked to me for about an hour yesterday, but I didn't really listen to any of it.

So, I sat in my usual seat and waited for Embry Call to tear me apart again.

"Your honor, the prosecution would like to offer Mrs. Cullen a one-time deal. If she admits her guilt to the murder of Aro Volturi and can disclose information on Edward Cullen's involvement in certain past crimes we will drastically reduce the sentences we have lined up following her prosecution."

"Your honor, this is neither the time nor place for a deal like this. It should be done -"

"We'd like Mrs. Cullen to make the decision on her own, your honor. Consulting with Mr. Cullen's former lawyer is hardly ethical, do you think?"

The judge was silent for a bit and looked from Jenks to Call to me. "Mrs. Cullen, it is your decision. You still have spousal privilege, you do not need to disclose any information about your conversations with your husband. You may choose to take the deal or leave it."

I closed my eyes and took three deep breaths. I was exhausted, I hadn't slept in a week. I hadn't eaten a full meal in two. I just wanted this to all end.

"My husband… he is – _was_ – my best friend. The best man I have ever known. Everything he did from the moment we met was to make me happy. He would make sure my favorite snack was waiting for me when I got to a hotel room, or he would surprise me when I was on tour, even if it was just for an hour or two." I smiled to myself, remembering the joy of walking into a dressing room and seeing Edward there waiting for me.

"The first week after we got married, he gave me a gift every day. He told me I was the greatest gift he could ask for, so it was the least he could do." I sniffled and did my best to blink the tears away. "He held me every night for months while I cried because I couldn't have his child, and already lost one of them.

"He knew I would always go to the shower to cry, it was my secret spot when I just needed to cry in peace. But, he figured out what I did and would follow me in there and just sit on the counter because he didn't want me crying alone. He never wanted me to be _alone_." I cried, my voice cracking as I spoke.

"I called him, the night before he was shot. I cried and told him I missed him. I think – I think he was coming here that day because he didn't want me to feel so alone. He was coming here because he would do anything for me, no matter the consequences. It's my fault he's dead."

I took a minute to compose myself and the courtroom was completely silent. I wiped away some tears but new ones quickly replaced them. "I have never denied the fact that I killed Aro Volturi. He broke into my home and attacked me. I don't deserve to go to prison for his death. But, I would gladly spend the rest of my life in prison because I caused the death of my husband. That is something I will never be able to forgive myself for."

I looked Embry Call directly in the eyes. "So, you can make all of the deals you want. You can ask me to make up stories about how Edward did the horrible things you blame him of and you can try to bribe me with my freedom. But no amount of freedom is worth turning my back on the man who died trying to put a smile on my face."

The room was silent, everyone waiting to see if I was done with my rant. When it was obvious I wasn't going to speak again, Call spoke up.

"So, you're refusing the deal, is that correct, Mrs. Cullen?"

"Yes, that is correct." I snapped.

…rep…

The trial lasted another two months after the incident. I had shut down completely through everything. I never said his name, couldn't think it either. Whenever I had to talk about him during the rest of my testimony I just said _he_. I couldn't handle it.

The jury deliberated for three days. We were called back into the courtroom and I sat with my hands folded in my lap.

This was the moment I had been waiting for. For nearly a year all I wanted was for this to be over, and now that it was I didn't know what to do with myself. I didn't know how to feel anymore.

Jenks and Mark stood next to me as the judge talked to the jury. "Defendant Isabella Cullen has been charged with conspiracy to commit manslaughter and murder in the first degree. What say you, madam foreperson, is the defendant not guilty or guilty of the conspiracy to commit manslaughter?"

I closed my eyes and transported myself back to the island. The first few days we were there so long ago were magical. We were free to finally just be ourselves. We talked about anything and everything. Edward would attack me as I cut up fruit and take me on the kitchen counter. It was my one and only happy place.

"Not guilty, your honor."

My eyes snapped open and I looked at the woman standing among the jury. She was the one who I saw nodding her head with Jenks' opening statement so many months ago.

 _Not guilty. Not guilty. Not guilty._

"Is the defendant not guilty or guilty of murder in the first degree?"

"Not guilty, your honor."

 _Not guilty. Not guilty. Not guilty._

The courtroom erupted in shouts, half of them cheerful and half outraged. All of my breath left me as I looked at the twelve-people sitting across the room. I memorized each of their faces, making sure I would remember them for the rest of my life.

"Your honor, we move to have the defendant Isabella Cullen removed from police custody immediately." Jenks said over the commotion.

I sat back down and dropped my head into my hands. I was free, but I didn't know what kind of life would be waiting for me.

 **A/N: Bear with me, please. Remember, I promised a HEA! So many answers in the next chapter, I promise.**

 **I know a year is very short for a trial like this. But it's fiction. I didn't want to draw it out forever. And I'm sure there are about a million and one legal things I got wrong. I tried my best, but I'm no lawyer!**

 **This is probably my favorite chapter, I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did.**


	14. Call It What You Want

_My castle crumbled overnight. I brought a knife to a gunfight, they took the crown but it's alright. All the liars are calling me one. Nobody's heard from me for months. I'm doing better than I ever was. 'Cause my baby's fit like a daydream, walking with his head down, I'm the one he's walking to. So, call it what you want, call it what you want to. My baby's fly like a jet stream, high above the whole scene, loves me like I'm brand new. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **Call It What You Want**_

…rep…

I stood patiently in my cell. There was a lot of paperwork that went in to getting released from jail apparently, so I spent one more night in my little cell following the verdict. I didn't really mind. I had no clue what was waiting for me outside.

So, there I stood, wearing a plain pair of jeans and a comfortable t-shirt that Alice gave Jenks for me.

Seth walked over, a kind smile on his face. "You ready to get out of here?"

"Honestly? I don't know." I replied. I didn't know much of anything anymore.

I heard the harsh sliding of the door for the last time and stepped out of the cell cuff-free for the first time in a year. Seth walked with me upstairs and had me sign a few release forms. He handed me a bag, but the only thing inside was my clothing I was wearing the day I got here.

"Edward picked up most of your other stuff." Seth told me.

The little fissure in my heart that had been growing since the incident got just a little bit bigger at the mention of his name. I could only nod in response.

I walked toward the front entrance of the precinct but stopped after just a few steps. "Thank you for being so kind to me."

Seth nodded. It was all he could do with people around. It was slow again, like when I was first arrested. There weren't officers surrounding me or anything. I was just handed my bag and told to go on my way.

Carlisle was at the exit waiting for me. He was dressed impeccably in a suit and tie, and I felt completely underdressed. He smiled warmly at me though.

He placed his hand lightly on my back and escorted me through the doors. I remembered taking this walk in the opposite direction so long ago. I could hardly get my legs to work then, and now I could hardly get them to slow down.

I expected the media circus waiting for me. It was a short walk from the door to the waiting car, but it was long enough to hear the shouts.

"Bella, what are you going to do without your husband, now?"

"Bella, how's it feel to know you got away with murder?"

I threw myself in the car and allowed myself to completely relax for the first time in a year. It was surreal to be sitting in a car and not handcuffed to anything.

Carlisle got in next to me and dropped something into my hands. I smiled, my first genuine smile in a long time, when I saw my wedding rings. "Thank you."

Carlisle took me to the penthouse, which confused me. "What are we doing here?"

"Our flight leaves late tonight. There's a doctor here to look you over, just a routine check-up. Alice and Rosalie also arranged a few things for you. I believe Alice said it was to 'buff away the jail stench.'

"We'll only be here for a few hours."

I could hear the subtext of his words. _We're here for a few hours until I take you to him._

…rep…

I watched the news on the flight, which was probably a mistake. But I had been cut off from everything for a year and I was curious. The first channel I turned to was coverage of my trial.

"Diane, do you think a murderer just walked free?" A man asked a smartly dressed woman. From the title on the television, I could tell she was a legal expert for the show.

"There was never any denying that Mrs. Cullen killed Aro Volturi. She willingly admitted to that. The question was, did she and Benjamin Cheney plan it, and was that plan what led to Volturi's death."

"Based on the testimony you heard, what would you have voted if you had been on the jury?"

"Guilty."

I turned off the television after that. My mind was hazy. I had so many things to think about, so many different things to worry about, that I couldn't focus on just one. It was exhausting.

Two layovers and a car ride later I knew exactly where I was. Carlisle dropped me off at the boat. We hadn't talked much on our journey. There was only one person I wanted to talk to. I couldn't help but smile when I saw who was driving the boat, though.

"Long time, no see, Ben." I said as I sat down.

He started the boat immediately as I sat down. I had absolutely nothing with me except for my passport in my pocket. Carlisle told me I could pack up anything I wanted from the penthouse, but I didn't want anything there. There was only one thing, one person, I needed.

The boat ride was short, thankfully, and I enjoyed the fresh air and sea breeze that surrounded me.

"Are you staying on the main land?" I asked Ben as we approached.

"Yeah, I've been there the whole time."

"You like it here?"

"Love it." He smirked.

We were just a few feet from the beach now, but I couldn't wait any longer. I jumped out of the boat and enjoyed the splash of water around my ankles. "See you around, Ben!" I shouted behind me.

I looked around at the island. It looked exactly the same. The house situated in the middle, the small pool right in front. A flood of memories ran through my brain. For the first time since the hug Carlisle gave me at the funeral, I let myself really think about Edward.

The scavenger hunt I planned for his birthday.

The mornings spent eating breakfast together in the sand.

The nights spent floating in the pool, talking about everything and nothing.

He walked out of the house then and leaned against one of the stone columns. I froze in my tracks in the middle of the beach.

I looked horrible and I knew it. The services Alice and Rose set up for me could only do so much. I was waxed and buffed, but I knew the after effects of the last year were still there.

Edward, though… Edward looked as gorgeous as ever. He was shirtless, for which I was thankful for, and had a pair of dark cargo shorts hanging low on his hips. His hair was a little lighter than usual, from all of the sun he's been getting, probably. Seeing him standing there made all of the air leave my lungs.

He walked toward me, slowly, but I couldn't move. My brain only had the capacity to take in his movements. When he got to me we simply stared at each other for a while, like we were both unsure of how to act.

I tentatively placed my hand over his heart on his chest. When I felt the faint thump of his heart I lost it. I looked up at him, the sun shining behind his head like he was an angel. He wasn't though, because he was here. With me. _Alive_.

My overjoyed giggle turns into full body laughter in no time. It's the first time I've laughed in months, really truly laughed. It could probably be confused for an insane cackle, too.

"Jesus, you're really – " I couldn't even think straight.

Edward gave me my favorite smirk. The one that pulled up just a bit farther on the right side of his face and made his eyes glitter with mischief. He cupped my cheek, his thumb running lightly over the dark circles I knew were under my eyes.

This was the kind of reunion that didn't really require a lot of talking. We had a lot to talk about, of course, but right now we just needed the companionship. We just needed to know the other was there, alive, free.

When his lips met mine, it was like the world had been turned upside down. It wasn't the sweet pecks he gave me when he would visit. This kiss was pure passion, full of unadulterated need. My whimper when his tongue slid over mine broke his resolve. He lifted me into his arms, his hands on my thighs holding me up. His hands tensed on my legs, like all he wanted to do was squeeze me as close as he could, but he was holding back.

Edward broke our kiss and trailed his lips along my neck. I turned my head toward the sky, giving him free reign of my neck, and stared at the beauty that surrounded us. The clear blue sky, the bright water swishing around us, it was all amazing. But nothing compared to the man in my arms.

I looked down and buried my face in his hair. A flash of the head of hair I saw outside of the courtroom invaded my brain, but only for a moment.

Edward lifted his head to look up at me, and I smiled down at him. "I love you," I told him.

"I love you," he repeated. He helped me carefully slide down his body until I was safely on my feet again.

"We have a lot to talk about." I said. "But all I can think about right now is that gorgeous shower I know is inside."

I didn't have long enough to truly enjoy the shower I took at the penthouse. The old showerhead in the jail just spat out a few drops of water, and Seth had to stand a few feet away from me while I showered. He was polite, always giving me my privacy, but still.

From what I could remember, the shower inside was nearly half the size of what my cell was. Two heads on the ceiling rained warm water down… and the thought of using shampoo that wasn't from a tiny sample bottle had me embarrassingly excited.

Edward grabbed my hand and led me inside. "Can I make you anything to eat while you shower?"

"No, you can shower with me, though." Maybe I didn't want to be completely alone to shower.

My free hand, the one not clutched in Edward's, trailed over the furniture as we walked through the house to the bathroom. I didn't realize how odd it would feel to be free, to be able to do whatever I wanted. I still felt like I had to wait for Seth to cuff me before I left a room.

Edward started the shower when we got to it, and I stood at the vanity, distracted by my reflection in the mirror. I looked rundown, beaten, and shattered. I was all of those things, but the few minutes I've spent with Edward already made me feel like some of my edge had been taken away.

I jumped when he placed a hand on my arm.

"It's okay. You're safe, now." He kissed my cheek lightly and his eyes met mine in the mirror.

"It doesn't seem real. What if I finally cracked, and all of this is just in my head?" Maybe seeing my husband's bloody body was enough to do me in. I could still be sitting in that cell, huddled in the corner, just living in my mind. Living in a world where I was free and Edward was with me.

My heart started to pound and my hands clutched the vanity in front of me. I had to squeeze my eyes shut and hope that when they opened, I was still on the island.

"It'll take you a while to feel normal. You'll feel like you can't leave a room, or you'll feel phantom hand cuffs around your wrists. It's okay to cry and scream and be angry. But you'll get through this, _we'll_ get through this."

I nodded and finally opened my eyes. He was still there, smiling at me through the mirror.

The room filled with steam and I reveled in it. Everything just seemed so luxurious now, even the soft towel that was waiting for me felt like heaven. I tore my clothes off and tossed them in the corner.

I pushed the large glass door open and looked behind me. Edward was still leaning against the vanity. "Aren't you going to join me?"

He smirked at me and quickly followed me in, losing his shorts on the way.

The moment the warm water hit my skin I let out a moan that rivaled any porn-star's best efforts. It just felt _so good_. Clean. Fresh.

Edward washed my body while I scrubbed my hair for ten minutes. He dragged a small wash cloth over every inch of my skin, washing the last of that cell away from me. Every once in a while, he would follow the cloth with a kiss, but nothing ever got too intense. We had a lot of talking to do, still.

Once my hair was rinsed out and Edward deemed my body clean I turned my attention to him. I grabbed another cloth and took my time washing him. There were slight changes in his body from the last time I saw it. I didn't like not having every tendon memorized anymore.

"Your arms are bigger." I mumbled. I dropped the cloth and wrapped my hands around his biceps. They weren't bigger by much, but there was definitely a bit more muscle than he had before.

"I've got a lot of free time." Edward shrugged.

My hands trailed along his arms, remembering every moment they've been wrapped around me. The first time we danced at the police benefit. When he got to Los Angeles the first time he visited me. The night he proposed to me. All of my best memories happened in his arms.

His arm twisted at just the right angle and I saw a flash of black. I grabbed ahold of him and stared at the dark ink imbedded in his skin. "When did you get that?"

Edward shrugged. "About a week after you were arrested."

My fingers trailed along the script. It was identical, or nearly so, to the font I had on my hip. Except this one says _Mo grá,_ _Bella_ right on his arm. "Why didn't you ever show it to me?"

"There was never a good time."

That was a good point. It wouldn't really have worked to have him whip off his shirt while Jenks was talking about testimony and evidence.

"What does… mo grá mean?" It was Irish, that much was easy enough to guess.

"My love."

" _Oh_." I stared at his arm for a while longer. The more I looked at the tattoo, the more I looked at him, I could feel that fissure in my heart. For so long everything that happened to me made the crack get bigger and bigger. I knew eventually it would tear me in half. But, now, I could feel it start to close up, just a little bit.

I wrapped my arms around Edward's neck and pulled him down towards me. Our lips met in a kiss just as explosive as the one we shared on the beach. The only difference this time was we were skin to skin and it made it that much harder to pull away.

"We have a lot to talk about," I panted once we broke apart. My hands were knotted in his hair and his gripped my waist like a lifeline.

With one more soft kiss to my lips Edward shut off the shower. He wrapped a towel around me before tying one around his waist. He led me to the bedroom and I got momentarily distracted by the big, fluffy bed. I remembered many pleasurable nights in that bed.

"You have some clothes in there," Edward said, pointing to a chest of drawers in the corner.

I opened the top drawer and smiled. _Normal, clean clothes!_ I pulled on a pair of linen shorts and a tank top and gave Edward a shy smile as I got caught caressing the soft fabric.

Once we were both dressed Edward led me to the roof. We sat on the couch right in the middle of the area, the sun beaming down on us. Edward sat in the middle with my legs draped over his lap. His hands caressed my legs, never not touching me.

"Where to start?"

"I'd like to start with the whole faking your death thing. Because I had to spend days thinking you were dead and it was my fault."

Edward winced at my words, and I felt bad for a moment, but I wanted answers. Needed them. "When did Carlisle tell you?"

"At the – the cemetery. I just lost all control when they…" This shouldn't be this hard. _He's alive. He's alive. He's alive_. "When they lowered the casket in the ground I couldn't breathe. Carlisle pulled me to the side, gave me a hug, and whispered, 'He's alive and waiting for you.'"

"I'm sorry you couldn't know before-hand. It was a bit of a last-minute plan."

"Why was it necessary, though?"

"You may have been incarcerated, but you were the most powerful woman in the city while you were on the stand, Bella. You had a lot of information that could have taken down some very powerful people.

"Many suspected that I would feed you information to spill to the prosecutor to reduce your sentence. Half of them were plotting to kill me, the other half you. Carlisle actually came up with the staged assassination."

"But who was it? I _saw_ you…"

"Offer someone the right amount of money and they'll do anything."

"But – "

"It's a tricky business, faking your death, but we did it. The man's family will be very well taken care of for the rest of their lives. You shouldn't worry about that part." Edward sighed and cupped my chin, tracing my lip.

"I watched, you know. I watched the telecast when it happened. It doesn't make up for it, not by a long shot, but I'm _so fucking sorry_ you had to go through that. Seeing you try to fight your way out there… I'm sorry."

I dropped my eyes to my hands in my lap. That will definitely be a day that will haunt me for the rest of my life. "Does anyone other than Carlisle know you're alive?"

"A few. The mayor, he gave us permission to fake my death. It's a criminal offence, but he's an old friend of Carlisle's. Ben, of course. You."

"Esme, Alice, Emmett?"

Edward sighed. "Carlisle will tell them soon. We needed their reactions to be as believable as possible."

"Why did Carlisle tell me, then?"

"Because you, my love, are one hell of an actress." That got me to smile. "That speech you gave Call when he tried to give you a deal… that was phenomenal."

"I wouldn't have taken it, you know. Even if I thought you were dead, I still wouldn't have ratted you out." Every word I said that day was the truth. I never would have turned my back on Edward, even if I thought he was dead. "I just said what I would have if that were the case."

"I know. Carlisle was worried, though. We figured they would make you a deal. He didn't want you to take it, so he told you I was waiting. I knew you wouldn't have taken it, though."

"How did you know Felix and Demetri would do it there?"

"You." I cocked my head to the side, confused. "You found the mole, we just exploited him to get what we wanted."

"Which one was it?" I asked.

"Mike. He's been taken care of, now."

I knew what that meant. Taken care of meant he was _taken care of_.

"How did you know?"

I shrugged. "I'm good at reading people. I spend a lot of time studying people and how they react in certain situations, it makes it easier for me to replicate it. I just told you my list of suspects, you found him."

"It was incredibly impressive, Bella."

There was one thing that had been nagging at me, though. "So, if you're dead, does that mean you're never going back to your life in Chicago?" If it did, it was a bit ironic. I didn't let him run away with me because I didn't want us to be fugitives living in the darkness and looking over our shoulders all of the time. We might still end up like that, though.

"I'll go back eventually. We just need to give it some time, things need to calm down. Like I said, the mayor is on our side. I won't face any legal troubles for faking my death. For now, we just needed people to think you had no interest in ratting them out anymore. Your speech was better than Carlisle and I hoped for."

I smiled at him, and he smirked back at me. The sun was starting to set in the distance, and the breeze started cooling the air around us. I looked around at our surroundings; the calm water, the trees flowing in the wind. We were all alone, as alone as we would ever be, probably.

"I have a confession," I whispered. My smile fell away and gave way for a more serious frown. Edward looked at me, now wearing a matching frown, and waited for me to continue.

I pulled my legs out of his lap and straddled him instead. My arms rested around his neck, my hands tugging lightly at the short hair at the base of his neck. I stared at him, our faces nose to nose. "I did it," I breathed out as quietly as possible. Edward's brows furrowed, so I elaborated. "I planned it."

Edward pulled my head back from his. "What did you do, Bella?" His voice was rough, but his worry evident.

"I met with everyone from the list I gave you that night. Just a routine meeting that Ben said you had with them often, so it wasn't anything unusual. When we were in the elevator with all of them I let them overhear that I didn't want Ben around the house that night.

"I knew one of them, the mole, would tell Aro. When he knew I was alone, he would want to get his revenge. I also knew I had to drag him out of hiding if I was going to get you out."

"Bella –"

"I wanted him gone, and I knew you did too. He sent our lives into a tailspin over and over. He nearly killed me, took away our option for children of our own… I know he's not the only one to blame for the shooting but he was a major contributor.

"And the thought of that man being related to me made me sick to my stomach every time I thought of it. He would have held it over us forever, Edward.

But, I needed to prove to the police that you had nothing to do with his disappearance. So… I took care of it."

"Bella…" Edward stared at me. I could see him go through so many different emotions; confusion, anger, bewilderment, they were all there. He gripped my chin and looked me right in the eyes. "We are never going to discuss this again, do you understand?"

It wouldn't be safe to discuss it again. I knew that. I also knew he needed to know the truth. I nodded and Edward collapsed back into the couch.

"Bella, you…"

"I know."

 _I got away with murder._

…rep…

Thankfully, there was no awkwardness after my revelation to Edward. He kept looking at me out of the corner of his eye as he cooked, but they were sweet looks. Looks of disbelief. Looks of love. Nothing I didn't want.

I sat at the counter while he worked in the kitchen. He poured me a glass of wine while he put together some food for us.

"I wasn't sure what you would want, so I made a little bit of everything for you. A burger and fries, of course. Your go-to. There's some leftover lasagna, and –" I cut him off with a kiss.

"You cook now?" I asked him with a smirk.

"I can get by. I've been here a while."

"Two… three months?"

Edward nodded. "Not quite three."

We sat down to dinner and I couldn't keep my moans at the delicious food inside. I didn't pay much attention to the food I had while I was locked up. I didn't eat most of the time, just because I was too wracked with fear or anxiety to do so. I knew I was probably too skinny, too bony, but I would start eating normally again. Edward would make sure of it.

I tried a little bit of everything, and it was all delicious. "You're going to have to teach me how to cook."

"If you teach me how to make a snickerdoodle. I can't get them right." Edward smirked at me from across the table.

A memory of him coming home one day, eating a whole plate of snickerdoodles flashed through my mind. The way his eyes would light up when he did something as simple as eating a cookie would always make my heart skip a beat.

I dropped my silverware, making Edward glance at me funny, then got up from my chair to plant myself in his lap. My lips were on his before he could stop me, and I could taste lasagna on his lips.

I swiveled my hips against his and let my intentions be known. Our kiss was messy and sloppy, but sometimes those were the best kind. The kisses where nothing was ever enough, where you shared every breath and let your tongues intertwine in the most intimate of ways.

Edward pulled away from me, just half an inch. Enough to tease me with his proximity. "You're sure?"

I swiveled my hips over his in a few smooth thrusts as my answer.

Edward lifted me off of his lap and pushed the plates to the floor with a crash. I sat on the table in front of him and he devoured me. His hands traced every inch of skin they could reach. His fingers spread out over my thighs and down my legs, then he moved them under my tank top and traveled along my stomach and around my back. His hands were so gentle, his touches so reverent.

I wanted to be completely consumed by him. I didn't want anything clogging up my mind but Edward; his hands, his lips, _him_.

I was breathless after our kisses, the air leaving my lungs in harsh pants. I was embarrassingly out of shape. "I need…"

"What do you need, Bella?" Edward asked, his teeth nipping at my neck.

" _Everything_."

Edward hooked his fingers in the waistband of my shorts and pulled them and my panties down all at once. He tore himself away from my neck and sat back down in his chair in front of me. He lifted my legs and placed my feet on the arm rests of his chair. The second his lips touched my sensitive flesh I flinched. It had been so long since I had any kind of physical contact with him other than a hug.

" _Edward_ ," I whined as he slowly pushed two fingers inside. It took so little to make me come, a couple kisses and a few thrusts of his fingers and I was left shaking on the table.

He stood from the table, knocking his chair over, and lifted me into his arms. His hands cupped my ass as he carried me into the house to the bedroom.

I attacked his lips, not caring about the wetness still there. I was dropped onto my feet at the foot of the bed. I let my hands explore Edward's chest, every curve and dip of the strong muscles that covered his body. I kissed the tattoo over his heart of our wedding date and paid special attention to the new tattoo on his bicep.

Edward pulled my tank top over my head and quickly threw my bra across the room. His hands slid up my waist before cupping my breasts. I moaned at the warmth that radiated from him hands, and the slight pinch of his fingers over my nipples. He eased me back onto the bed, and I moaned again at the softness of the bed and sheets underneath me.

My hands spread out over the soft bedding, slightly distracted from the man in front of me. He captured my attention again quickly as his shorts dropped.

His body was covering mine then with every inch of us skin to skin. My legs intertwined with his, our chests flushed together, and his arms wrapped tightly around my back, hugging me as closely as possible.

Our lips met, but this kiss was much more subdued. It was all about lips getting reacquainted, relearning everything they once knew so well. I reached down between us and lined him up with my entrance. The second he could, Edward's hips thrust into mine and we were connected from head to toe.

My hands gripped his back as he started moving over me, his entire body flowing with each of his thrusts. They were slow and deep; my hips did their best to meet each of his thrusts.

Edward pulled his lips away and leaned his forehead against mine. His eyes snapped open, that marvelous green blinding me for a moment and reminding me of the picture I stared at while I sat through his funeral.

Tears started to leak out of my eyes, and Edward kissed them all away. "I love you," he repeated over and over with each thrust. His eyes never left mine, and the intensity of them nearly made me blush.

His thrusts got harder, but their pace stayed slow and sweet. My nails dug into his back as I felt myself start to give in to the absolute pleasure coursing through my veins. I repeated his mantra now, whispering my love to him as I came undone in his arms, and he did the same.

My arms still clung to him, and my heart rate didn't slow down like it usually did as we laid together in our post-coital bliss. I could feel the panic start to take over my body, and I felt like if I didn't hold on to him as tight as I could I would realize this was all a dream.

Edward rolled over on to his side but I didn't let him out of my grasp. My breath started coming in pants and I buried my head in his shoulder, needing to feel him as close as possible.

Edward gently rubbed my back and kissed away the tears as they fell. "Shh. It's okay."

"I'm sorry. I don't…" I didn't know what was wrong with me. Everything just seemed so dreamlike and I never wanted to wake up.

"You're overwhelmed. You're coming down from a year of anxiety, stress, and fear. It's okay." Edward whispered to me. He held me as close as he could, knowing it was just what I needed.

For the first time in months, I got to fall asleep in my husband's arms.

…rep…

It was still dark out when I woke. Edward was snoring softly in my ear, and the familiar sound made me smile. I reveled in his closeness for a while, gently tracing his warm skin and peppering kisses along my favorite spots; the one right behind his ear, the dip in his neck… spots I hadn't gotten to see in a long time.

Edward seemed too peaceful to wake, so I carefully disentangled myself from him, threw a blanket around my shoulders, and went to sit in one of the lounge chairs right outside the bedroom.

I got myself situated and looked around me. The moon was bright and casted an ivory glow along the beach. The dark water shimmered in the distance, and the warm breeze made my hair tickle my bare shoulder.

I didn't really know how I ended up here, at this point in my life. A few years ago, I had finished up working on _Unknown_ with Jacob and was looking for something to keep me from drowning in Hollywood.

Now, I was fresh out of jail and acquitted of murder charges. A murder that I actually committed. I didn't know if it was the fact that I had to come to terms that my husband killed people on a semi-regular basis, but I didn't feel a lot of guilt over Aro Volturi's death anymore.

I did, at first. I planned it, I wanted him to come to me and I wanted that night to end with him leaving this earth. He never would have stopped, he would have held the fact that he was my father over my head for the rest of my life. But, I didn't make him come to me, I didn't wrap his hands around my throat. I baited him, yes, but his actions once he got there were his own.

I thought about the words Edward told me so long ago. When we were at Alice's party and he was talking about how he saw himself and his job. _I'm not a good man, Bella. I've killed people. I happily killed the man who outed you to Volturi, and I'd do it again in a heartbeat if it meant keeping you safe._

I was keeping my family, my husband, safe. Most people would find a million holes in that logic, but it made sense to me. I had to stop worrying about the public's opinion of me. It no longer mattered, there was no way to come back from a murder trial anyway.

But, that was okay. I had more important things going on now.

I jumped a little bit when Edward knelt down next to me. He tucked some of my hair behind my ear and looked up at me with a small smile. "You okay?"

I smiled at him. I may have fucked up everything I touched in the last few years, but I didn't screw this up. I ran my fingers through the birds nest of hair on top of his head. "Yeah, I'm good."

 _At least I did one thing right._

 **A/N: The response to the last chapter was insane. Thank you for all of the kind words. I hope you all enjoyed this one as well!**

 **I'm leaning toward doing a separate companion piece for the EPOV outtakes. There will definitely be some new moments in there, so I would recommend having me on author alert for when it gets posted.**

 **If anyone is curious, the island they go to is modeled after an actual private island. Google** _ **Gladden Private Island**_ **if you'd like to see it!**

 **The last line is another lyric from Call It What You Want.**


	15. New Year's Day

_Don't read the last page, but I stay when it's hard or it's wrong or we're making mistakes. I want your midnights, but I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day. Hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you. ~ Taylor Swift,_ _ **New Year's Day**_

…rep…

I was in heaven. I had to be, because I was so unbelievably comfortable. The bed underneath me felt like a cloud and the light sheet covering my body was smooth like butter. And the bed… the bed smelled like Edward, so that was a definite check in the heaven box.

I sighed, unable to put of the inevitable. When I opened my eyes, I took in the room around me; the dark wooden ceiling and the bright sun shining through the open doors surrounding me.

 _Shit. It's real._

I patted the bed next to me, but it was cold. I sat up and looked around me. The house was very open, and there were sliding doors behind me that cut off the bedroom from the rest of the house. They were open, and I could see the back of Edward's head as he sat at the couch.

"Hi," I said, my voice gruff from sleep.

Edward's head turned toward me, and a smile lit up his face. "Hi," he said. His voice was so much smoother, absolute velvet compared to mine.

I wrapped myself in the smooth sheet and stumbled my way over to him. I plopped myself down on the couch next to him, but I guessed it wasn't close enough for Edward because he pushed the sheet away from my legs and planted me on his lap.

Edward wrapped his arms around me, pulling me as close as the sheet allowed. "How are you feeling?"

I shrugged. "Good, I think," before I could elaborate my growling stomach interrupted me. "Hungry, I guess."

"What would you like for dinner?"

"Dinner? What time is it?"

"Six."

"What?" I looked around me, looking for a clock or a clue that Edward was just messing with me. The sun was already low in the sky though.

"You were exhausted, it's expected." Edward kissed my bare shoulder before he stood, carrying me with him. Instead of heading to the kitchen like I expected, he carries me to the bathroom and drops me in front of the shower. "Take a shower, or soak in the tub. I'll make you some food for when you're done."

"I can help –"

Edward interrupts me with a quick kiss. "Let me spoil you, please?" There is a quiet desperation laced in Edward's voice. I can see a hint of it in his eyes, too.

The last year was hard on me, but I never really thought too much about what Edward had to do. We talked about it a little bit, that day I was in the hospital, but that was it. I imagined a world where our roles were reversed and I could picture myself wanting to do anything for Edward once he got out. Wanting to make his transition as easy and comfortable as possible.

I smiled up at him and nodded. "Thank you."

My mind was a jumbled mess as I showered. As I washed my body I remembered the reverent touches from Edward last night. But then, my mind flashed back to the desperation in his eyes just minutes ago.

He probably blamed himself the whole time. He didn't know I planned everything, so he must have thought Aro was after me mostly because of him. The brave faces he put on for me when he visited me probably vanished the second I wasn't in the room.

The last year had been hell for me, but it was hell for him too.

I finished up my shower, suddenly needing to see Edward again. Just to make sure he was real. I hated to get dressed again, considering it was already getting late, so I slipped on another pair of soft cotton shorts and a t-shirt.

I got distracted on my way to the kitchen. I dipped my feet in the pool, just standing on the top step, and got lost in the view around me. The view from every side of the island was just the sky meeting the water. There were no skylines in the distance, no other islands disrupting the view. It was like Edward and I were the only people on the planet here.

Arms gently wrapped around my waist, but I didn't flinch this time. _Progress_. I was standing a step down in the pool, and Edward a step up, so he was even taller than me than usual. He leaned down and kissed my cheek. "You're beautiful."

I giggled at that. "I'm a mess, actually."

"No. You're strong, resilient, magnificent…" His hands trailed down my sides and he played with the hem of my shorts. "I love these little shorts you always wear here."

"I love you." I replied.

"You shouldn't."

I spun around so fast at that I nearly lost my balance and fell in the pool, but Edward grabbed me around the waist before I could fall. I looked up at him, a frown on my face. "Why would you say that?"

"You could've had… everything, Bella. You're so fucking talented, and because of me you had to use that talent to commit perjury instead of going on to win a few more Academy Awards. I ruined you." His last words were whispered in anguish and they made my heart nearly tear in two.

I stepped out of the pool and made Edward switch places with me so we were eye level. Gripping his chin in my hand, I forced him to look me in the eyes. "I was drowning before I met you. I let everyone work me until I was so worn down I ended up in the hospital. I let people walk all over me and did whatever I was told. You freed me, Edward.

"You showed me what really mattered in life. I don't care if I never win another award. I don't care if I ever act again, because I have you. For the first time I have a family that truly cares about me.

"I love Charlie, but things will never be able to go back to how they were with him. I haven't talked to your family much, but I know they're not going to tiptoe around me or make me feel bad for what happened. My father didn't even go to your funeral, but Jasper didn't let go of my hand the entire time. They were there for me when I had no one else.

"I was scared and alone before I met you. You didn't ruin me, Edward. You saved me."

Edward gave me a tentative smile.

"Besides," I said. "I'm already one of the most awarded people at the Academy Awards. The only person that has more than me is Katharine Hepburn." I smirked, hoping my attempt at humor would lighten the mood a bit.

"Really?"

I took advantage of my rare height advantage and kissed his forehead for a change. "You're really clueless when it comes to pop culture, aren't you?"

I finally got that smirk I wanted from him. "Not when it comes to you. I spent a lot of time on Google before our weekend in Los Angeles."

"Yeah? Find out any juicy gossip?"

Edward stepped out of the pool, causing me to step back to make some room for him. "I found out that I was a lucky bastard that someone like you would want me."

"I always want you, but right now I want you to tell me what's for dinner because I'm fucking starving."

Edward lifts me over his shoulder, one arm securing my legs and the other resting his hand over my ass. He gives it a light squeeze, so I reach down and do the same to him through his shorts. I get a hearty laugh for it.

Edward watches me closely as I eat, and I don't have to ask him to know why. I took a closer look at myself after my shower today and I could tell the stark difference between my body now and what it was a year ago.

I had never been one of those actresses that was a stick figure. I ate what I wanted, but I also worked out. I was healthy and in shape, especially after Edward and I started to work out together. I had gotten more muscular, but all of that was gone now. I was one of those stick figures.

I stood at the sink, washing the few dishes we had, and Edward stood next to me, towel in hand ready to dry. It was very domesticated for us. It made a laugh bubble up in my chest.

"Want to let me in on the joke?"

"It's just… we're quite the pair, aren't we? I just got off on murder charges, and you're supposedly dead, but here we are. Just doing the dishes like nothing is wrong."

Edward smirked at me as he dried the last plate. He grabbed my hand, pulled a bottle of wine from the rack behind him, and led me into the living room. He handed me the bottle and started pulling the cushions off of the furniture.

"What are you doing?"

"I seem to recall someone saying her true passion was making forts." Edward smirked, tossing a throw pillow at me lightly.

"I did say that… about four years ago."

"Well, you get started with these and I'll get the cushions from the roof."

An hour later we had our masterful fort made. There were so many cushions from around the house, what with all of the lounge chairs, that everything around us was padded and comfortable.

Edward laid next to me and I rested my head on his outstretched arm. Everything was so peaceful.

"I think…" I hesitated, because I didn't want to be wrong. But I was pretty sure I wasn't. "I think this is all real."

Edward looked over at me. "You think?"

"Yes. Even this morning I was fairly certain I had gone insane and was living in my mind. But, I'm pretty sure I'm not now." I nodded.

Edward kissed my forehead and pulled me over to him, my head on his chest. "I love you, Isabella Cullen."

…rep…

 _I couldn't remember how long I had been here. All I knew was that my clothes were soaked from the rain and the grass was muddy under my feet. I sat on the ground, not caring about getting my clothes dirty. Nothing really mattered to me anymore._

 _I crossed my legs underneath me and read pristine headstone across from me. EDWARD ANTHONY CULLEN: Beloved son, brother, and husband._

 _Karma was a bitch. I deserved it, but it was a fucking bitch._

 _Once Edward was gone, I didn't care about the trial anymore. I wanted to be convicted, I wanted to spend the rest of my life paying for my stupidity. I deserved to be locked up for everything that I had done._

 _I killed my husband. I murdered the man who would do anything for me, I was the reason my best friend was dead._

 _But, here I was. Free and alone. Like I said, Karma was a bitch._

 _So, I spent all of my time here. Rain or shine, I was sitting across from my husband's gravestone because I didn't know what else to do. I didn't know how to move on._

I jerked awake when there was a light tugging on my arm. I was disoriented for a minute, before I found sparkling green eyes to calm me down and bring me back to reality.

"Bad dream?" Edward asked me. His arms snaked around my waist and he pulled me on top of him.

I yawned and stretched my body out over his. "Yes."

"Same thing?"

I sighed and nodded. They were always variations of the same thing. Edward dead. Sometimes there were nightmares where I was found guilty, but those rarely happened these days.

It had been about five months since I got to the island. I was still adjusting, but things were getting better.

Edward's family, our family, was visiting soon though and I think that will be the reality check I need to really believe this is all real. They didn't give us an exact date when they were arriving, but we knew it would be any day now.

Carlisle told everyone Edward's situation and they all wanted to see him for themselves. I couldn't blame them. I didn't truly believe he was alive until I saw him for myself. I had hoped, of course, that what Carlisle had said was true, but there was always a seed of doubt in the back of my mind.

We laid there for a few more minutes. Edward stroked my bare back and helped me forget all about my nightmare. "Ready for our run?"

I nodded into his shoulder and sat up. Edward gripped my hips, keeping me in place when I tried to get up. When I looked down at him I saw his eyes glued to my bare chest. I chuckled and leaned down to kiss his cheek. "After."

That got him up and moving. We both changed. Edward just pulled on a pair of shorts and called it a day. I pulled on shorts and a sports bra.

We had gotten into a good routine the last few months. I started working out with Edward again, and now every morning we would go for a run. This island really wasn't very big, and a lot of it was covered in thick vegetation, so we ran laps around the house.

We started working on building my muscle back up, and Edward even taught me some self-defense moves.

Edward spent a lot of time working still, though I didn't know what exactly he was doing considering he was supposed to be dead. I sat outside and thought a lot while he worked. I loved floating in the pool and leaning over the edge to look out around me. I had a lot to think about.

I started writing to Charlie a few months after I got here. It took a while for our letters to get to and from each other, but at least we had some form of communication. Our relationship would never be what it once was, but that was okay. I knew he was there if I ever needed anything.

The only other person I had any contact with was Kate. She stayed true to her word and came to Chicago for my trial, but she didn't stay the whole time. I didn't get to see much of her then, but I appreciated her support.

I couldn't let either of them know Edward was alive, of course, so I had to play the role of mourning widow in some of my letters. After I had to write those I would always seek Edward out and distract him from his work for a while.

When we returned from our run we both collapsed on the couch. Well, I collapsed. Edward was hardly panting so he walked over and got us both a bottle of water before he sat next to me.

"I hate you, you know."

"What did I do, now?" He asked, mock horror on his face.

"You can run five miles without turning into this," I waved a hand over my sweaty, tired body and gulped half of my water.

"You're getting better."

A few minutes later my breathing has finally slowed down and I looked over to see Edward's eyes greedily roaming over my body. "I suppose I did make a promise about after earlier, didn't I?"

Edward pulled me into his lap and situated me right over his already hard erection. I wondered how long he had been staring at me.

I pulled my bra over my head and the second he was able, Edward latched on to one of my breasts, his tongue enjoying the stiff peak of my nipple.

I started to rock my hips over his and Edward abandoned my breasts to kiss me. Our tongues tangled to the point where it was hard to tell where he ended and I began.

"I told you we should've called."

"They don't have a phone, smartass."

Both of us snapped our heads toward the front entrance where our entire family, Carlisle and Esme included, stood.

Edward pulled me closer to his chest, covering me as much as possible. He stood, keeping me in his arms, and I clutched myself to him. _God, this is humiliating_.

I buried my head in his neck, unable to look anyone in the eye.

"We'll be with you in a few minutes." Edward said as he passed everyone and started taking us toward the bathroom.

"Nice tattoo, Bella!" Emmett shouted as we left the room.

I assumed he was talking about the tree on my side. "Thank you." I shouted, just out of habit even though all I wanted was for a hole to swallow me up.

Somehow, Edward managed to maneuver us both into the shower and get it started without having to put me down. I waited for him to put be back on my feet when we were safely locked away, but instead he resumed his previous activities. Him attention to my breasts as the water fell around us.

"What are you – ah – doing?" I asked.

"We'll be quick." He muttered, his hands roaming along my back. He finally set me on my feet but it was only to rid each of us of our shorts. I was back in his arms in a few seconds.

"Edward, we can't –"

He adjusted his hands, holding me up easily with one arm, and used his free hand to cup me between my thighs. "You want it just as much as I do, baby."

"But that doesn't mean… fuck." All fight leaves me as soon as he's inside me. There is nothing slow or sweet about his movements. We both see this for what it is, a quick fuck.

Edward kisses me, though I think it's mostly to keep me quiet. My hands grip his back, trying to find some traction on his slippery skin.

My orgasm takes me by surprise and I swallow a few of Edward's grunts shortly after. Edward sets me on my feet carefully and gives me a satisfied smirk.

We quickly clean ourselves up in the shower before pulling on the first clothes we find in our room. Edward grabs my hand and leads me back out to the main room.

Everyone stares at us for a moment, but then I realize they're mostly staring at Edward. He's the one they thought was dead. Esme comes over and throws her arms around him and I quietly step aside.

Everyone takes their turn greeting Edward, and I can tell how much he hates the attention. He puts on a good smile though, he knows what he put them all through.

"Bella? I believe this belongs to you." Jasper comes over, holding the sports bra I was wearing earlier up.

I quickly snatch it from his hands. "Well, this is sufficiently mortifying."

"No, mortifying is admitting to sucking dick and fucking in an office while under oath." Emmett laughed, then Rosalie smacked the back of his head.

I frowned, looking at him in confusion for a moment before it clicked. "Shit!" I had repressed most of my memories of the actual trial. My testimony was hell on earth, and I had no desire to remember any of it. "I said that, didn't I? _Shit_."

I collapsed in one of the chairs and leaned my head back. "At least I didn't say anything about it being during a meeting." I mumbled and the room went silent. " _Fuck_. I don't know how to be around actual people anymore." I was used to either not talking to anyone for days or only talking to Edward, who didn't care what crazy shit spewed out of my mouth. I covered my face with my hands and hunched over in embarrassment. "Someone else needs to start talking."

If no one started to talk I would fill the silence with my inappropriate rambling, and that was dangerous.

Emmett slapped Edward's arm and glared at him. "During a meeting? How'd you get her to do that? I asked Rosie once and she – "

"Okay, we really don't need to talk about this anymore."

"Edward gets to have all the fun," Emmett sulked, flopping down on the couch where just minutes before Edward sat with me in his lap. "Meeting blowjobs, faking his death… when do I get to fake my death?"

"It wasn't fun, Emmett. Your brother could have actually died!" Esme scolded him, her arm wrapping around Edward's.

I never quite understood Esme Cullen. She was polite to me, for the most part. She was kind to me on my wedding day and never said anything untoward. But I always had this feeling she never liked me.

She loves her children, that much is obvious. She adores Jasper and Rosalie, but I've never gotten that same attention. Maybe Carlisle poisoned her mind with stories about me, or maybe she just always wanted a woman more suited to their lifestyle for Edward.

I just wasn't good with moms, apparently. Adoptive mother: hated me. Biological mother: wanted to use me for her own personal gain. Mother-in-law: refused to acknowledge me most of the time.

Hugs from Alice and Rosalie pulled me out of my thoughts.

"How are you doing?" Rosalie asked me. They both pulled up chairs next to me and looked at me expectantly.

"I'm okay. I have nightmares a lot, and some little things still freak me out sometimes, but I'm working on it."

"I wish we could have gone to the trial. Edward and Carlisle thought it was best we stayed away."

I nodded. "Yeah, the trial… wasn't a good place to be. I think I've repressed most of it in my memory."

"We watched you though, every day." Alice said. "You were really brave, Bella."

I didn't really know how to respond to that, so I didn't. "I'll get us some drinks." I went over to the little outdoor kitchen and grabbed a tray of glasses and a bottle of wine. Edward knew more about wine than I did, and I was sure he hand-picked every bottle in here, but I just grabbed the first one my hands touched.

As I was carrying everything back to everybody, Emmett came over to me. "Long time no see eh, Hollywood?" he asked, before he playfully shoved the back of my head. Then, I was back in an interrogation room.

" _You're a great match for Cullen. Both cold blooded murderers, willing to do whatever it takes to get what you want." Riley stopped right behind me and I could feel his hands resting on the back of my chair. It made the hair on the back of my neck stand up. "So, tell me, why did you want Volturi dead?"_

" _I'd like my lawyer." I repeated. I didn't see it coming, I couldn't have with him standing behind me. He gripped the back of my head and slammed it into the table._

The tray fell from my hands. "I'm sorry! I didn't do it! I'm sorry!" I screamed. I backed away from the situation until my back hit the wall. In my mind, it was the cold, stone wall of the interrogation room that I slid down until I was sitting there with my hands nearly pulling my hair out.

"Hey, it's okay." A velvety voice whispered to me, and I wanted to believe it. A warm hand cupped my cheek but I instinctively flinched away. "It's just me, Bella. Edward."

My eyes slowly opened. With our eyes locked, Edward reached up and pulled my hands away from myself. I could feel strands of hair between my fingers still, so I knew I had pulled some out.

"You're okay." He told me again. He cupped a hand around my cheek and I couldn't help but lean into his touch.

"I'm sorry," I whispered to him.

"It's okay."

"I – I'm going to go sit outside for a few minutes. You should stay with your family." I told him and quickly slid out the door right next to us. Thankfully I didn't have to walk through the room filled with his family.

I walked down the beach and sat so my feet were just barely in the water as the tide came up.

Flashbacks were nothing new to me. My first few weeks here with Edward I had them a lot more than I did now. We had our routine and I knew I was completely safe with him here. I knew I was safe with all of the Cullen's as well, but I think the introduction of so many people at once just put my body on edge.

Edward's been able to touch the back of my head before, but the first few times he did I had similar reactions. We've worked on it, though.

"May I?" A calm voice came from behind me. I looked up to see Carlisle next to me. I nodded and he took a seat.

He pulled off his shoes and socks, and I noticed he was wearing a suit. "Edward doesn't even wear suits here."

Carlisle chuckled. "I came straight from a meeting in Chicago. I have more appropriate clothing for later." He rolled up his pant legs and stuck his feet in the shallow water next to me.

I nodded and looked back out at the water in front of me.

"We've all been arrested at one point or another, me and the boys. No one has ever gotten charges to stick long enough for it to go to trial."

So, I was the only one stupid enough to get caught.

"None of us were ever treated as harshly as you were, though. Biers has been fired and is under investigation for mistreating suspects. The man who attacked you has been dealt with as well.

"They thought you were our weak spot. They thought they could scare you into turning us all in. I owe you a great deal of gratitude for what you did for my family, Isabella."

I shook my head. "You don't owe me anything."

"None of the other women in this family would have been able to handle the situation like you did. I wouldn't have trusted any of them to take over for the boys while they were locked up. I know this probably isn't what you want to hear, but this life is in your blood."

I flinched at that. It was in my blood because Aro was my biological father. "I think you're giving me too much credit. I didn't do much at all."

"But you did it. You trusted your husband when he told you he believed in you, and you trusted your instincts while he was gone. You could have very easily turned your back on us to set yourself free."

"I never would have done that." I snapped. That thought never even crossed my mind. It wasn't an option.

"I know. I was skeptical at first, but Edward trusted you implicitly. That speech you gave Call when he tried to give you a deal is what made me realize it, too. It earned you the respect of every crime boss in the city."

"What?"

"They were all watching, of course. They were scared shitless that Edward would feed you information to reduce your sentence. I have no doubt that my son would have, too, if he thought you were going to be convicted.

"But you didn't budge even when you could have to save yourself. There are some high-ranking people in this business who wouldn't have been so brave. I've gotten many calls about you and your loyalty."

I shrugged. "I just said what I would have if… if he was actually gone."

"That is exactly what makes it so special. You knew he was alive, yet you still risked your freedom to protect him, and the rest of us as well."

Carlisle sighed and looked out at the view in front of us. I rested my head in my hands and did the same.

"Thank you for protecting my family when I could not, Isabella. I'm sorry for the after effects of your time in the jail, but they are nothing to be ashamed of. The longest any of us have been locked up is a month, so I'm afraid we can't understand what you're going through. Edward seems to be taking good care of you, though."

The mention of Edward makes me smile. "Yes, he is."

I could hear the squish of the sand under his feet. I didn't have to look behind me to know it was Edward joining us, and I didn't flinch when he placed a light hand on my back. "Everything okay?"

He sat next to me and I rested my head on his shoulder. "Yeah, I'm okay."

"I'll let you take over from here," Carlisle said, picking up his shoes and heading back toward the house.

"I'm sorry I made a mess." I was sure the glasses and bottle shattered when I dropped them.

"That's not important. Do you want to talk about it?"

"I just… I flashed back to that afternoon with Biers when Emmett touched the back of my head."

"I've touched the back of your head. Were you scared then?"

I blushed, remembering the last time he had his fingers laced in my hair as he pushed and pulled my mouth along his cock. There was definitely no fear then. "No. I think it was just a bit of a shock to suddenly have all of these people around. I'm not used to being around everyone again."

Edward placed a gentle kiss of my temple. "Do you want to stay out here, or come inside for a drink and some invasive questions from Alice?"

He was joking, but I knew it was probably a pretty accurate description of what we would face if we went back in. "We should go back in."

Edward and I rejoined the party inside. We sat on the couch together and Edward never took his hands off of me, always rubbing soothing circles into my shoulder or hand, always comforting me.

Thankfully, the Cullen's didn't stay longer than the late afternoon. They had a long day of traveling and wanted to be well rested for tomorrow's festivities. I didn't know what festivities those were, but Alice and Rose just smiled at me when I asked.

Later that night, when it was finally just Edward and I left on the island again, he pulled me out to the beach. He had soft music playing in the background and spun me around in the sand.

"Do you know what tomorrow is?" He whispered to me.

Honestly, I didn't even really know what month it was. I was pretty sure I had turned 25 at some point in the not too distant past, but I told Edward I wasn't in the birthday mood around that time. "No."

"Tomorrow marks two years since you did me the honor of becoming my wife."

That couldn't be right. Two years? We had been married about six, maybe seven months when Edward got arrested. I spent our first wedding anniversary in jail. I guess it did add up.

"I don't know if the second year counts, considering I was incarcerated for most of it."

"Oh, it definitely counts." Edward said. "If we can get through a year where both of us are in jail and one of us is on trial for murder, I'd say we can get through anything."

"Well, here's hoping there are no more murder trials in our future."

The next day the Cullen's arrived with two boats full of things. Alice had decided that we were celebrating every holiday I missed for the last year.

We spent the morning celebrating Edward's thirtieth birthday, and my twenty-fifth. The afternoon was filled with a miniature thanksgiving lunch and a necessary batch of snickerdoodles. Hot chocolate was made and holiday music played as the sun set.

We watched actual New Year's Eve fireworks from the distance on the beach. It was the perfect end to a year that was anything but perfect. But, things were getting better. Every day was better than the last, and with this group of people around me I knew my life would never be dull or lonely.

Edward held me in his arms as Emmett and Alice shouted the countdown to the new year. He cupped my cheek and smiled down at me. "No matter what, you're my girl?"

"Always."

 **A/N: This one was so hard for me to write. I hate endings. Absolutely hate them, which is why I'm making the companion EPOV piece. We do still have the epilogue though, but that will likely take me a few days to write.**


	16. Paris (Epilogue)

_If we go down then we go down together. They'll say you could do anything, they'll say that I was clever. If we go down then we go down together. We'll get away with everything, let's show them we are better. ~ The Chainsmokers,_ _ **Paris**_

…rep…

 **TWO YEARS AFTER RELEASE FROM JAIL**

I looked Embry Call directly in the eyes. "So, you can make all of the deals you want. You can ask me to make up stories about how Edward did the horrible things you blame him of and you can try to bribe me with my freedom. But no amount of freedom is worth turning my back on the man who died trying to put a smile on my face."

The room was silent, everyone waiting to see if I was done with my rant. When it was obvious I wasn't going to speak again, Call spoke up.

"So, you're refusing the deal, is that correct, Mrs. Cullen?"

"Yes, that is correct." I snapped.

"Cut!"

I slunk back into my chair and wiped the tears away from my face. Reliving this moment was not something I had been looking forward to, and I was so emotionally drained I could hardly keep my eyes open.

I walked over to the monitor and watched a quick playback of the scene we had so far. We had already done it about ten times, but it looked nearly perfect now. Thankfully, because it was nearly three in the morning.

"We're good." I said to everyone around me. They all agreed and started packing up for the day.

By the time I got back to Carlisle and Esme's home it was four in the morning and I was dead on my feet.

Edward and I came back to Chicago a few weeks ago. I had a few things that needed to be filmed here, and Edward didn't want to be left on the island alone. It was risky, but that was why we were staying with Carlisle and Esme. The younger Cullen's didn't even know Edward was here, it was just easier to keep it a secret that way. They knew I was in town filming, but that was it.

No one outside of the family had gotten word that I was here either, which was a blessing. I had gotten pretty good at sneaking around the city.

I snuck into the house as quietly as I could. I was expecting to see Edward asleep in our bed, but it was still made. I sighed. I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep until I saw him, not after everything I just had to relive.

About a year ago, Edward convinced me to make another film and album. I wasn't going to, I was done giving the public so many parts of me only to have them tear me apart. But, Edward told me I needed it, and he was right. I needed my side of the story to be out, and I could let them do with it what they wanted. I would get the last word on the subject at the very least.

The trial scenes, the scene where Edward was shot… those were the worst to shoot. They're nearly exact replicas of what I lived through three years ago and they were slowly draining the life out of me.

I snuck around the house until I saw a light on under the door to Carlisle's office. I knocked quietly and stuck my head through the door.

"Come in, Bella." Carlisle said kindly. He and I had grown surprisingly close. I never forgot what he did to me early on, but I knew that wasn't really him. He was sick. I had to separate the two people in my mind; this Carlisle was nothing like the man I first met.

Carlisle sat at his desk and Edward in a chair across from him. I was surprised to see Emmett and Jasper sitting next to him.

"Busted, huh?" I asked, smirking at the other two boys.

They all smirked at me, but I only had eyes for Edward. He stood as I walked over and cupped my cheek. "You okay?" Edward knew what we had filmed today, and he knew I always needed to see him after.

I turned my head and kissed his palm. "Yes. I just wanted to say goodnight. Or, good morning?" The sun was about to come up, so saying goodnight seemed a bit stupid. "Sorry to interrupt, I'll leave you alone now."

What I really wanted was to drag Edward out of there with me but I didn't want to take him away from their conversation. It was work related, I was sure of it, and I knew he missed his work. He would get back to it soon enough.

By the time I was showered and changed Edward was sitting in bed. "You didn't have to leave because of me."

He shrugged. "We were done."

I got into bed, glad that I wouldn't have to try to fall asleep alone. With my head on Edward's chest and his heartbeat in my ear, I was asleep in seconds.

…rep…

Eight months later we were back again. For good this time. Tomorrow at this time, on New Year's Day, the whole world would know Edward had faked his death three years ago. I couldn't wait to see the whole world panic, and I couldn't wait to see people's reactions to _reputation_. It was my favorite thing I had ever created.

We were in our new home in Chicago. We demolished our old one. There were too many bad moments there. Our new home was just as luxurious, if not a little more homey and a little less stuffy than the other one. I loved it.

We got in late last night and were having everyone over tonight. No one, not even Edward, had seen the completed film. Edward was the only one who had heard the album yet, too.

When I woke up I had seven texts from Alice about how excited she was for tonight. Tonight, was also going to be the first time Edward and I met some new additions to the Cullen family.

Two years ago, Alice and Jasper adopted a pair of thirteen-year-old twins, Maggie and Jared. Jasper had been adopted, so it was always something they wanted to do. They were still planning on having children of their own, but Jasper ran into Jared when he got himself into some trouble with the cops after running away from a foster home. One thing led to another, and they adopted him and his sister not long after.

Rosalie and Emmett also had a new baby. Well, he was nearly two, so I didn't know if that meant he was still new. His name was Alec Edward Cullen, and Edward and I were his Godparents. I also knew the significance of his middle name. That little boy would be next in line to take over the Cullen family when he was old enough. The thought sent a shiver down my spine.

It was stupid for me to be nervous about meeting the new kids. I was twenty-eight, I shouldn't be intimidated by a couple of fifteen-year-olds and an infant. But, I still had my moments when I was wracked with guilt that I couldn't give Edward that.

Everyone would be here within the hour, so I sat at my vanity to get ready while Edward showered. I smiled as I looked at the three velvet boxes lined up on the table in front of me. Tonight was the release of _reputation_ , but it was also our fifth wedding anniversary.

I had received four gifts so far. When I woke up I had a diamond studded snake bracelet that wrapped around my wrist three times. After we had breakfast Edward gave me a ring, very similar to the bracelet in that it was snake-themed and slithered around my whole finger. Then, just before I took a shower, he gave me an earring that wrapped up my whole ear, covered in diamonds of course.

His snake theme made me smile. Ever since the trial all of my social media pages had been flooded with the snake emoji. People thought I was a snake; they thought I was shady and money hungry and decided a snake was the perfect representation of me.

So, I decided to take back the narrative.

Early this morning all of my social media was deleted, with nothing but a video of a snake slithering around and striking to replace it.

Technically, I had gotten my first gift a few days ago, before we left the island. Edward sent me to a tattoo parlor on the mainland with a piece of paper I was forbidden from looking at. I was to only show it to the tattoo artist and I couldn't look at it when it was done. I haven't seen it at all since.

It should be healed by now, and Edward promised after his shower he would show it to me. I had a feeling there was one more gift. Five would mean one for each year of marriage.

I didn't really care about the gifts though. I cared about the life I got to have with my husband. I just knew giving me gifts made Edward happy so I never said anything about how I didn't need jewelry or fancy clothes. I just needed him.

There was a garment bag sitting on our bed, so maybe that was the last gift.

The shower finally stopped as soon as I was finished getting myself ready, minus my clothing. I kept my robe on, per Edward's explicit instructions.

I joined him in the bathroom but was disappointed he was already wrapping a towel around his waist when I got there. It was probably for the best, we didn't have much time before people would start showing up. Edward grabbed a handheld mirror and wiped the steam off of the vanity mirror.

"It better not be something stupid like a portrait of Emmett's face." It was big, I knew that much because it took for-fucking-ever. I was used to the sting of a tattoo but having it go right over my spine hurt like a bitch.

"I promise, it's not Emmett's face."

I nodded. "Okay. Can I look now?"

Edward pulled my robe down my back and held the mirror in front of me. I could feel his eyes on me, but I only stared at the reflection of my back.

" _Oh_ ," was all I could get to leave my mouth.

It was the Cullen crest. Just like Edward's. I knew Jasper and Emmett had similar tattoos, and I figured Carlisle did as well. I thought it was a mafia thing, a sign of solidarity amongst members.

"You're one of us. After everything you've done for this family…"

Oh. It was a sign of solidarity. This just meant I was one of them now.

"Edward, this is…"

"Do you like it?"

"Of course."

"Fucking sexy is what it is." He turned me around and set the other mirror down. Edward's hands trailed along my exposed back, tracing the new ink and rubbing along my shoulders. His lips started peppering kisses along my neck. "We should've just had everyone watch it at their own homes. Our anniversary is no night to be hosting a party."

"It was a good opportunity to meet everyone." I mumbled, hoping my nerves weren't evident. Of course, Edward saw right through me though.

"You don't need to be nervous. I hear Maggie is your biggest fan and Jared has had a crush on you for years."

I grimaced at that. "That definitely doesn't make me feel better. I just…"

Edward sighed and lifted me so I was sitting on the counter with him standing between my legs. "We've had this conversation before, Bella."

"I know. I'm just sorry it's not us with a new baby named after you."

"Don't apologize for something you had no control over." Edward lifted my head to meet his when I tried to bury it in his neck. "I never wanted children. It was expected of me, but I never wanted to have another person to worry about, especially with the life I lead."

"You looked happy, though. When I told you I was pregnant, you looked happy for a second before I told you what happened."

"I was happy because, out of all the scenarios that would have had you so sad, that one was easily solved. If you wanted children, I would have happily become a father. It isn't something I needed, but I would've done it for you. You never wanted children though, right?"

"No, not really. But – "

"Then we don't have an issue, Bella. Please stop worrying about this."

I sighed. "Fine."

Edward lifted me off of the counter into his arms, and my robe fell to the ground around us. "Now, I believe someone has another gift to open."

I peppered his face with kisses and used my feet to try and get the towel around his waist to fall. "Are you my last gift?" I breathed in his ear.

"Keep that up and there will be no party tonight, Isabella." Edward said as he set me on the bed next to the garment bag.

I reached for the bag, assuming it was the gift, but Edward thrust another velvet box in front of me. I flipped open the lid and was met with blinding diamonds. The necklace was a few inches thick, and all diamond. It was a snake, obviously, and it had its tail wrapped around near the head which would rest heavily on my chest. It wasn't overtly a snake, but if you looked long enough you could tell.

It had to have cost millions of dollars. "Edward –"

"Wear it, please?"

I looked into those sparkling green eyes, the ones I loved more than any diamond he could ever give me, and gave in.

Edward secured the necklace around my neck and pushed me so I was lying back on our bed. He hovered over me and kissed his way from my stomach to my lips. "Tonight, I'm going to have you just like this. Nothing on except for that necklace."

His lips trailed to my bicep where my own anniversary gift tattoo to him was located. We had similar ideas, but I got mine done a few weeks early. Edward didn't care about material things, so getting him gifts was a challenge. One thing I knew he loved was seeing tattoos covering my skin, so I had a lyric I wrote that I thought perfectly summed up our relationship put on my inner bicep. _If we go down then we go down together._

Just as the flat of his tongue met my skin the doorbell rang.

Edward was ready in about forty-five seconds, after he pulled on a button down and a pair of jeans. He left me with instructions to wear the dress in the bag. The dress was surprisingly simple; black, layered, and lacy. But, it did have the perfect cutout in the back to show off the new tattoo he had inked on me.

I shoved my feet in a pair of heels because I didn't want to hear Alice berate me for walking around barefoot and hurried downstairs.

Alice and Jasper stood in the living room flanked by two teenagers. They were both blonde, and had striking blue eyes, but that's where the similarities stopped. The girl, Maggie, had long hair and a petit body. The boy, Jared, was lanky but not too awkward. They stood slightly behind Alice and Jasper as they talked to Edward. I wouldn't be surprised if they were a little intimidated by him. He had a habit of scaring people off.

"Bella!" Alice squealed as she saw me approaching. I got a bone crushing hug from her as soon as I was within reach, and then a much calmer hug from Jasper.

Edward wrapped an arm around my waist and Alice and Jasper reached behind them for Maggie and Jared.

"Whoa, _hot_ ," I heard Jared mutter. His eyes were locked on me and there was no disputing what he was thinking about. It made me more than uncomfortable, but Jasper lightly knocked him on the side of the head.

"That's your aunt," he grumbled. "Sorry, Bella. We're still working on some… issues. Jared thinks it's cool to be the bad boy. He's been arrested twice in the last month for shoplifting."

"You think it's cool, getting arrested?" I asked him. I got a typical indifferent teenage shrug. "It's fucking stupid. It's cool until you're on trial and you don't know if you'll ever be free again. Then you're just the fucking idiot who threw his life away."

Alice called me earlier and told me about Jared's issues. They asked me to scare him a little bit, seeing as I was the one with the most experience behind bars. _Ironic, huh?_

Jared had the good sense to look a little embarrassed and backed up to find a spot on the couch.

"Was that okay? I did my best Edward impression." I smirked. Edward looked down at me, obviously questioning my choice. "You can be very intimidating. I'm not, I needed inspiration."

He shook his head at me and kissed my hair.

"H-hi, Bella," a small voice interrupted our moment. I looked over and saw Maggie peaking at me from behind Jasper.

I gave her my best smile and a little wave. "Hi, Maggie."

"I really love your music and movies," she said, a light blush covering her cheeks. She pushed herself away from Jasper a bit and moved a little closer to me.

"Thank you. Do you wanna see my music room? Edward built it just for me." I whispered to her, like it was a secret shared between just us.

Maggie's face lit up and she nodded eagerly. I took her to the room just off of the living room and showed her around. She eyed the awards lining the wall and I handed her a few to hold. We were only in there a few minutes before the doorbell sounded again.

When we got back to the living room Emmett and Rosalie were just walking in. "Hollywood! Look at you all free and shit. Three years clean, eh?" Emmett joked. He loved cracking jokes about my incarceration. It pissed me off at first, but after a few years I learned to laugh at it. Most of the time.

I held my hands out and did a little twirl. "I also haven't made any awkward sexual confessions under oath in _years_. Aren't you proud?" I heard a cough from behind me and saw Jared sitting on the couch. _Shit, I've got to be careful about what I say, now_.

Rose was walking in, holding the hand of a tiny little boy already dressed in pajamas. "His babysitter is coming to pick him up in an hour, but he wanted to meet his aunt and uncle."

Edward was next to me in an instant and squeezed my hand. I looked down at Alec and he was already a spitting image of his father. He was getting some curls on top of his head and had that look of mischief in his eyes that was constantly on Emmett's face.

"TV!" he said as Edward and I knelt next to him.

"He's seen you on the television before." Rosalie laughed.

"Hi, Alec. I'm Bella." I whispered. I had no clue how to talk to a child this small. I had never really interacted with one before. But, before I could say anything else he wrapped his arms around my neck in a tight hug. I froze for a moment, but he never let go. My arms wrapped around his tiny body and he laughed in my ear.

"No more cry," he told me when he pulled back.

"There was a segment about you on the news the other day, they showed clips from the trial." Rosalie said. I didn't have to ask to know what clips they showed if I was crying.

"No, no more crying."

Alec noticed Edward then, and gasped. "You gone!"

Edward smirked at him and whispered something to Alec that made him giggle.

I stood up and gave Rosalie a hug while Edward and Alec sat together on the ground. "He's adorable."

"Yeah, he's something. Already too much like his father."

"Oh, God, good luck with that."

I went to the kitchen to grab a bottle of wine and some glasses and saw Jared standing at the refrigerator, a bottle of beer in his hand. I walked over and snatched it from him. "Thanks."

Putting the bottle back in the refrigerator, I shut the door and went about getting what I needed. Wine, glasses, tray. Then, there was a hand on my ass and it sure as hell wasn't Edward's.

"Hey," I growled at him, but he was gone. Edward had him pressed up against the refrigerator, his hand around his neck.

"If you touch my wife again it will be the last thing you ever do. You need to learn some goddamn respect if you're going to be part of this family."

"I-I'm sorry!" He choked out once Edward let go of him.

"Jesus, Jared," Jasper grumbled as he came in and took in the scene around him. "I'm sorry, Bella."

"It's okay."

Everyone dispersed. Edward and I went to the living room. I sat next to Alice as she looked at the physical copy of the album I had on the coffee table. It was just a plain black cover with the word _reputation_ in white in the center.

"Bella, these titles! Getaway Car… I Did Something Bad… amazing!"

"I didn't hold anything back this time," I smirked. I reached forward for the remote to the television and heard Alice gasp next to me.

"What is that?" She asked, and I felt a finger trace the new ink on my back.

"One of Edward's anniversary presents to me. He had me get it but didn't show me what it was until today." I smiled.

Alice looked completely shocked though. "Bella the only people who – it's an old family rule that no one can get that tattoo unless they've killed for the Cullen family."

"Oh," I shrugged, attempting to play it cool when I felt anything but. Edward failed to mention that earlier. "Well, I guess _technically_ I have." More than technically, but only Edward knew that for sure.

I looked over at Edward, sitting all smug in a chair across the room. He patted his lap and I went to sit with him. "You didn't tell me this was the mark of a murderer," I whispered in his ear.

"It's a mark of loyalty."

The night progressed without much more drama. Jared stayed as far away from me as possible, his eyes constantly on anything other than Edward. Alec got taken home by his babysitter but made Edward and I promise to visit him soon.

My phone started ringing non-stop about thirty minutes before the movie was set to go live on Netflix. Kate called me to congratulate me, but it left a bittersweet feeling in the pit of my stomach. She was married and pregnant now, and no longer my assistant. She was always more than my assistant though, and I missed her terribly while filming.

Carlisle called, giving me his condolences that he and Esme couldn't make it tonight. She was sick, or so he said. She just didn't want to come. I got calls from some cast members, producers, and Netflix executives.

With the clock just turning to midnight, Edward pulled up Netflix on the television and clicked on the new ad for the film that was at the very top. Just like the album cover, the opening screen was completely black and the word _reputation_ slowly appeared.

I pulled up the newly re-installed twitter app on my phone and typed out a simple message.

 **Ooh, look what you made me do.**

Two hours later everyone sat, completely silent before a million questions were hurdled at me. An hour after that, the house was finally quiet again and Edward carried me upstairs. He had been relatively quiet after the movie, and it made me a little nervous.

He said nothing as he set me on my feet at the foot of our bed. Warm hands trailed along my arms up to my neck. When the tips of his fingers trailed along my lips I sucked his thumb in, wrapping my tongue around it.

"Strip," Edward hissed at me. He switched our positions quickly and sat on the edge of the bed, looking at me expectantly.

I didn't have much to strip off, so I slowly lifted my arms out of the sleeves of my dress and let it fall to the ground at my feet. I had no bra to get rid of, seeing as the dress was completely backless, so I hooked my thumbs in the lace covering my hips and let it slide down my legs. I left the heavy necklace around my neck, knowing he wanted it on.

Edward's hands circled my waist and he kissed the skin that was face level, my stomach, my hip and the tattoo there, and the tree covering my side. "I had no clue, that night. You were just this gorgeous woman I was sitting next to who let me whisper dirty things to her all night. I had no clue how extraordinary you were.

"I don't know much about filmmaking or what it takes to win all of those awards you've got, but that film was spectacular. _You're_ spectacular," Edward's hand started to roam again, this time they ended on my thighs and slowly pushed my legs apart so his hand could stroke my center.

"I didn't understand it at first. When I found you were working on _Hopeless Kingdom_ I didn't get why you would want to let people know so many personal things about us," Edward's voice was soft but the hand between my legs started getting rougher as he spoke.

"But then I realized what it was. It was a chance for me to get in your mind, to know your deepest secrets and how you truly felt about what you went through." Two fingers started to steadily thrust into me and I had to grip Edward's shoulder to stay standing.

"I fucking loved it. The way you told our story was beautiful even though it was a rocky beginning." His thumb started rubbing rough circles over my clit while his fingers kept their rhythm.

"But this one… Jesus it was like the ultimate love letter. It was the best gift I could have ever received, knowing that was how you saw me. I know how many sacrifices you've had to make for us and I know the hell you went through for us to get to this point. To see it like that, from your perspective, was a gift I'll cherish forever.

"You are a force to be reckoned with, Isabella Cullen. Thank you for being mine." His fingers curled at just the right angle and my entire being clenched around him and white-hot pleasure coursed through my veins.

"You and me, Bella," Edward said. He stood in front of me and quickly deposited me on the bed. His body covered mine, unfortunately still fully clothed, and his lips consumed mine. "We're going to own this fucking city."

Edward stood and removed his clothing; his pants fell to the ground with a clash as his belt hit the floor. It made a shiver run up my spine.

He stood at the foot of our bed and pulled my legs up in his arms. "We're perfect, Bella," he grunted as he entered me. "You're fucking perfect."

I had no leverage what with my legs hooked around Edward's arms. I could do nothing but lie there and moan as Edward thrust and gripped and brought both of us unparalleled pleasure.

We didn't sleep at all that night. It seemed like Edward felt the same sense of freedom I always did when I released these films. It was as much release for him as it was for me. He had been hidden away for so long, but he was free now.

Hours later Edward had me on my stomach, his entire body pushing mine deep into the mattress with every slam of his hips when the alarm started to go off. Thankfully I was angled in the corner of the bed and managed to reach the clock. I only meant to hit the button to stop it, but Edward pushed my body further up on the bed with a particularly hard thrust and I ended up knocking everything off of the nightstand.

I buried my head in the pillows, muffling the long, loud moan that escaped me after I don't know how many orgasms. I heard Edward's groan loud and clear as his lips were at my ear.

After a few moments slumped against me, Edward got up. Though I didn't know how he had the energy to move. All I could do was bury my head in one of the pillows that survived the night. A soft blanket was wrapped around me, and a gentle kiss placed on my forehead.

I was exhausted. I wanted to sleep but then I realized it had been long enough for people to watch and listen to everything, for people to start posting articles and reviews of what I've worked on the last two years.

I sat up with a groan, wrapped the blanket around my bare shoulders, and reached for my laptop. Thankfully it was on the other nightstand and not the one that I demolished. I had about 200 new emails from the last six hours, but I ignored those for now. Once I started reading reviews I couldn't stop.

Edward emerged eventually, already dressed in a pristine navy-blue suit.

"Listen to this! _Musically, Cullen's third LP takes listeners on a journey unlike any other full of love, sex, and tragedy. Visually, the film leaves you wondering just who Isabella Cullen really is and whether she did, in fact, get away with murder three years ago._ Oh! And then there's this. _Was Cullen's husband truly waiting for her on that island, or was it a dream? Did Isabella really confess her guilt to the planning and execution of Aro Volturi's murder, or was that part of her dream-world? While we'll never know what was whispered, time will likely tell if Cullen did, in fact, fake his death."_ I laughed at all of the theories. This was exactly what I wanted.

I wanted to leave the public with more questions than answers. I wanted them to wonder what I whispered to Edward in the last scene. I needed to see them squirm.

Edward leaned against the doorway and stared at me. He had his signature smirk on his face and I blushed at the way his eyes raked over me.

"It's a little late for the blush, sweetheart," he said, coming over and sitting on the edge of the bed next to me. Edward cupped my cheek with one hand and kissed his way down my other, nuzzling his head in my neck. It sent a flash of memories from just hours before through my mind. Edward's head in that exact same spot as he lost control of his body and he could do nothing but let it take over as he brought us both to the edge.

"I love you," I whispered to him.

Edward pulled back and looked at me with a smile. "I'm really fucking proud of you."

I smiled back at him and pushed my computer off of my lap. "Are you nervous? Is it kind of like your first day of school all over again?"

Edward chuckled, but shook his head. "I don't get nervous."

It was true, for the most part. Edward was a confident man, nothing shook him. Except for me. "I seem to recall someone anxiously watching Oscar nominations with me a few years ago. I sensed some definite nerves then."

"Those were nerves for you, not for me."

I freed my arms from the blanket around me and straightened his already perfect tie. "Be careful today, okay?"

Edward nodded and stood from the bed. "Would you like to meet me for dinner?" He asked as he picked up his phone and wallet from the floor. They must have been on the nightstand.

"Sorry about that," I said, a deep blush returning to my cheeks.

"Mmm. I'm not. So, dinner?"

"Okay. Are you actually going to show up this time?" The last time he asked me to meet for a meal in the city I was surrounded by guards and given a note that I was to take over everything. Not a very fond memory, nor one I would like a repeat of.

"Yes, I promise."

…rep…

A week and a half later I was sitting on the couch in our living room across from Oprah. This was going to be the one and only interview I did for the foreseeable future. A camera crew surrounded us, and I could see Edward glaring at every person who looked at me skeptically. Which was nearly everyone in the room.

We started off with simple questions, just warming up really. Then she got to the good stuff.

"There are questions that the entire world would crucify me for if I didn't ask."

I laughed at that, because it was true. "Of course."

"Did you do it?"

I shook my head. "No." I understood the need to ask that question, but there was no possible way I would, or could, say anything else.

"A lot of people think that speech you gave the prosecutor was what saved you in the eyes of the jury. Did you know your husband was alive during that time?"

"No. I didn't know he was alive until I saw him once I was released." Lie, lie, lie. That had become my life.

"The scene of you the day your husband was supposedly murdered was heartbreaking. How much of that actually happened in reality?"

"This movie was the most… intense one I've done. You would think with all of the random twists and turns it would be the one we fabricated the most on, but it was the complete opposite. Very little had to be added to make that time in my life exciting enough to make a movie out of.

"That portion of the film was the most difficult part for me, but also the part I'm most proud of. It was the most emotionally draining thing I've ever had to do, going back to that place."

I took a deep breath before I continued. "Sometimes, when I close my eyes, I still feel like I'm in that cell. It's always that night, and it's like I can still hear the echoes of my screams."

I looked up and found Edward across the room. He looked furious that I was having to talk about this, but I expected it. His face softened as I looked at him, though.

"It was the most heart wrenching scene I've seen in a film in a long time. It's Oscar stuff," Oprah smiled at me. "They just recently re-activated your Academy membership, correct?"

"Yes. I was blacklisted for a while, understandably. As soon as I was released they got me back to my original standing in all of those organizations."

"This one will surely make an appearance on some nominee lists next year. Would you attend the shows, should you be nominated?"

"Yes, of course. I'd be honored if it was nominated for anything, but I don't really expect it to. I know a lot of people seem to think it was… insensitive to make a film about this. It was important to me, though. To let people know that they shouldn't be ashamed to protect themselves."

We talked more about the upcoming tour and about our life now that we were able to come back to Chicago. Edward and I had a new routine. He went to work in the morning and I went to rehearsal. I met him for lunch or dinner, whichever we could both manage. Our deal was to have one meal together a day unless someone was out of town.

We were both busy, but we were making ourselves a priority which was something we failed to do in the past. We would both get busy and we would only see the other asleep, but we weren't letting that happen now because we knew what it was like to think we lost the other forever.

"I have just one last question for you. If you had known what your life would become that night you met Edward, would you have done anything differently?"

I didn't have to think much for this one. "No, not at all. Our life has been tough, there's no denying that, but I don't regret a second of it. Everything that happened got us to this point where we're stronger than ever."

…rep…

It started pouring in the middle of the show, but no one left. It was the last show, maybe my last show I'd ever do of this size, and the rain made it that much more memorable.

I had been on tour supporting _reputation_ for the last seven months. We mostly went around the states, but I also did a few European shows. Edward visited when he could, but he was busy getting his footing back in Chicago. We had spent the last three years straight constantly with each other, and it was an adjustment to not see each other every day.

The last two shows of the tour had been here, in Chicago, and I couldn't have been happier about how they turned out. I got to have Edward and our family there and it was the perfect way to end this phase of my life.

I didn't think I would ever make another album or film about my life. I was done being so forgiving with the media. I was going to actually take time off now. No more writing music or scripts. I was going to settle into a life in Chicago with Edward.

I would act again, I was sure, but not for a few years. I needed a break, and the right movie to come along to get back into acting in a film that wasn't about my life.

Edward was already waiting for me when I got off stage and lifted me in his arms despite the fact that I was drenched from the rain.

"Amazing, Bella. Just… amazing," Edward whispered to me.

We were surrounded by people but it was like we were the only two in the whole stadium. He looked at me, his hair wet and sticking to his forehead, and I fell in love with him all over again. I was in love with the man who whispered dirty things to me the first moment I met him, and I was in love with the powerful businessman and family leader that I knew him to be today.

Maybe I was stupid, or even a little insane, but I couldn't bring myself to regret anything when it came to Edward. If I were a normal woman I might have grown to regret all of the issues we've faced, maybe blamed him for some of them, but I didn't.

We had both fucked up a time or two where our relationship was concerned, but we never held grudges against each other. There would never be anyone else for either of us, that much was certain.

Our family found us then, and I was pulled out of Edward's arms by Emmett who set me on Jasper's shoulders. I got high-fives from people as we walked back to my dressing room. Some were crew members, band members, and other people I had absolutely no clue who they were but I didn't care.

Jasper dropped me off at my dressing room and the rest of the family dispersed. I was pretty sure they had some kind of party planned back at our house, but I kept my mouth shut.

Edward waited with me while I changed and packed up a few of the things I had here. I didn't really have another assistant after Kate left. I had Ben and Eric with me constantly, and if I ever needed anything they would take care of it for me. I did miss traveling with my best friend, though.

I threw my bag over my shoulder, but Edward immediately slid it off and carried it himself.

"Sad?" He asked, probably seeing the bittersweet expression I could tell was on my face.

"I don't know. Are you still going to love me even when I'm not all of… this?" I waved my hand at the stadium around us.

"You'll always be all of this. You're talented, passionate, and driven. That's part of what I love about you. Maybe you'll never tour again, maybe you will in a few years. You can do anything you want. This doesn't have to be the end."

 **...rep…**

 **A/N: Get ready for a monster of an author's note. First, I wanted to say thank you to everyone who has read/favorited/followed/reviewed this. Hearing what you all thought about this story lifted my spirits every time I got a review. You have no idea how nervous I was that no one would ever find this, but I'm so honored you all took the time to read this story. Thank you.**

 **Second, an EPOV companion piece is coming – soon! It'll be snippets of his point of view of various moments from HK and rep. If you have any requests, feel free to PM me or review with them!**

 **Third, I know I said this was the end, but a little plot bunny hopped into my head the other day. I kept feeling like this wasn't the end for these two, and I think I might have another little journey to take them on. I have a poll in my profile – would you guys want another sequel focused a little less on Hollywood and a little more on E/B's mafia life? It probably wouldn't be as long as rep, more likely closer to 50k words. I purposefully left a few stones unturned in the epilogue because I plan to dig deeper in this possible expansion. I'd love to hear your feedback.**

 **Again, thank you.** _ **For everything.**_


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